| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/27/2009 6:51:03 PM | | yeah, i'm kinda fed up too- but i've lived alone most of my life and raised my son as a single 'rent since he was 11 .anyway, i do believe there is someone for everyone, just haven't found her yet.i can take care of myself in the meantime. | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/27/2009 8:11:29 PM | | ya I know its a guelling search to find that one out of a million in this world of....... well you read my earier post. | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/27/2009 8:34:32 PM | Okay Mortalez, What are you testifying before a Congressional committee?? I GET THE POINT.
Im thinking you are one of those " nice guys" we read about, always treating your little princess with kit gloves, doing everything for her, wash her feet, do her laundry, chauffeur her around , comes home with flowers and chocolate all because some idiot who told you thats what women like, and you wonder why women get bored with nice guys?
Now I didn't say go out and treat her sh1t. but most of you nice guys cannot for what ever reason understand being a doormat catering her every desire doesn't make for a exciting relationship, its more a puppy dog relationship its soooo cute in the beginning and then the novelty wears off after a while.
Upgrade my man, upgrade and lose the " nice guy" attitude. | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/28/2009 8:42:22 AM |
Okay Mortalez, What are you testifying before a Congressional committee?? I GET THE POINT.
Im thinking you are one of those " nice guys" we read about, always treating your little princess with kit gloves, doing everything for her, wash her feet, do her laundry, chauffeur her around , comes home with flowers and chocolate all because some idiot who told you thats what women like, and you wonder why women get bored with nice guys?
Now I didn't say go out and treat her sh1t. but most of you nice guys cannot for what ever reason understand being a doormat catering her every desire doesn't make for a exciting relationship, its more a puppy dog relationship its soooo cute in the beginning and then the novelty wears off after a while.
Upgrade my man, upgrade and lose the " nice guy" attitude.
Nope I dont cater to every spoiled whim of a so called princess, I dont spend craploads of money on them but I do treat them with kindness and affection and only expect the same in return. oh and being kind or NICE should not be a bad thing it should be expected. I can be an a$$hole easily but my mother raised me better than that and at 6ft5 & 250LBS and training in thai boxing loosing my temper could land me in jail so I control my temper(exept when i was a bouncer). I want a partner NOT a challenge I have a playstation for that I only wish to want a woman that feels the same. | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/28/2009 12:32:39 PM | Mortalez,
Hey...it's your list man. Keep it if ya want to, but it doesn't appear to be working too well.
Just saying...you might want to review your list a little bit.
I've read your postings all over this forum, and I'm with Mahogany Rush here...I think you're a classic doormat nice guy. It's your choice to look into fixing it, or keep getting your heart crushed. Eventually you will accept that YOU are the one with a dating problem here...you are the common denominator.
I'm done with this thread.
Paul ;) | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/28/2009 12:56:15 PM | Sorry to hear that you're single & stressed, mortalez. I have found that as soon as you let go of the need & struggle for something it comes to you when you're ready to receive it. RELAX...... | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/28/2009 1:50:54 PM | Mortalez, The fact that you don't get it tells me something, who said anything about being a ***hole?
And you come back with "you treat them with kindness and respect", oh isnt that sweet, did we learn that from Vogue or Cosmopolitan?
I hardly believe being a " nice guy" got you the boot, and as mentioned earlier if you keep running into women who " change" during the relationship then YOU maybe the problem.
One or two I can see, but a lot of women ? sorry I dont buy it..... being "nice" doesnt guarantee success in a relationship you have to have substance among other things. | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/28/2009 6:53:56 PM |
One or two I can see, but a lot of women ? sorry I dont buy it..... being "nice" doesnt guarantee success in a relationship you have to have substance among other things.
Kindness & Love are the greatest of all things one can have, receive or give.
all else is fragil and fleeting. oh and I dont read cosmo that rag is whet fill the heads of women to want matirial things (How to snag a rich guy in 4 dates) geeeeeezzzzz. | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/28/2009 7:25:17 PM |
Ok here is my choice making criteria.
1.Does she have time to devote to a relationship.
2.Do I find her attractive.
3.Are we mentally compatable.
4.are we sexually compatable.
5.Does she live in my city(dont do long distance)
6.Do we have the same taste in movies, music, etc etc.......
7.Does she not have kids or have older or adult kids..(I avoid those with younger kids.)
8.Does she show affection(not the same as sex).
9.Does she have male friends(I avoid that like death)
10.Does she like to go out all the time( High maintanance)
11.Does she drink alot( people do stupid things when drunk)
12.Is she faithful(go without saying but if the others are in check this is taken care of)
And all the women I enter a relationship with have these qualities AT FIRST!!!!!
only 2 have stayed true and one got deported and another got another job out of state only 3 months into our relationship and I aint movin out of a paid for house.
And I recently broke rule five but never again.
How is it even possible to have the answers to this list before a relationship? You sound very controlling and passive aggressive. Your list is ridiculous. You want to dictate her friends and time out? What you are looking for is you with female genitalia. It doesn't work that way.
Get a dog instead. If you have not figured out why you are struggling with women, you need to go to counseling more often.
It is not women you are unhappy with, it is yourself. | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/28/2009 8:42:50 PM | Kindness & love are the greatest of all things one can give?? where is the puke emoticon  what kind of sappy saying is that??? is that what you say to your potential girlfriend? no wonder they run.
Do you have anymore touching, heart wrenching ,hallmark moment sayings ? | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/29/2009 12:27:27 AM | | I've been fed up and at the end of my rope a number of times; however, after my life's most crushing experience caused by a woman, I very quickly picked myself back up and got with the one who was to be my only wife (so far) and mother of my daughter. Well that fell apart in time, so here I am on POF. A few weeks ago the one who'd dealt me that crushing blow years ago messaged me on Facebook and told me I was only 2nd to her now husband in all the men she'd known, and that I in no way deserved what was dished out. I've allowed myself to feel over and over again, and yes that means being possibly hurt, over and over. Just know that your ability to do that makes you an "Iron heart" that no matter what the world and women throw at, you'll remain decent. There's satisfaction in maintaining that kind of toughness, and you never know what turns life will take and who will realize their former errors. Yes, there a lots of guys that pull that kind of crap on women too, making it harder for you and I to win the hearts of women, so it's a two way street that way.. | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/29/2009 7:24:43 AM | I once heard a really smart guy say that he doesnt show too much kindness right away. Because he felt that most woman think that is permission to become demanding and take advantage of the guy. I think he was right. Its a piss off that we cant be ourselves with people, but we first have to be true to ourselves and not give away all our goodness to a complete stranger. I had to read up for myself on what the red flags are for someone who wont be good for me. Save your specialness for someone who know s you well and can appreciate you.  | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/29/2009 9:03:07 AM |
Kindness & love are the greatest of all things one can give?? where is the puke emoticon what kind of sappy saying is that??? is that what you say to your potential girlfriend? no wonder they run.
Do you have anymore touching, heart wrenching ,hallmark moment sayings ?
OK maybe you are right , maybe I should slap them around a bit, and put them on the street to make me some money, cheat on them and bring home some nasty STD's, and top it off with making them pay my child support for the outside babys I will create.
Would that be more manly in your opinion? | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/29/2009 10:45:07 AM | I have been wondering the same thing about men. This was my 4th marrage. After 15 years of marrage on March 4th 2009 my husband said I want a divorce. He came by last week to RETURN my child support check for my 2 sons ( not his ) had them before I met him. He stold my check out of my mail box after his bank would not let him deposit my check he brought it back just to harrass me, the poliece had to litteraly drag him out of here. Do I miss the kisses and touch YES, but I am about to give up on ever finding true love. I hope you find true love. | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/29/2009 11:48:45 AM | | mortalez, I know this arcane process called " reading" is sometimes difficult for some,so could you tell me where I said to go out and slap a woman around or put them on the street blah blah blah, I could dumb it down for you if youre having trouble understanding what im saying slick? | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/29/2009 4:23:42 PM |
mortalez, I know this arcane process called " reading" is sometimes difficult for some,so could you tell me where I said to go out and slap a woman around or put them on the street blah blah blah, I could dumb it down for you if youre having trouble understanding what im saying slick?
Actually since you laugh at the idea of showing a woman kindness, respect and love I gathered you were suggesting I have a go at the opposite(not that I would).
The opposite of treating a woman in a possitive was is to treat them in a negative way and its clear that you think NICE behavier is wrong so you must feel its better to be MEAN.
hot - cold
light - dark
fast - slow
sick - healthy
alive - dead
good - evil
nice - mean
love - hate
eeeerrrr get the idea? by bad mouthing possitive things you show favor to negative things. | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/29/2009 7:54:40 PM | Mortalez you still dont get it? doesn't surprise me one bit, you come across sometimes as a piece of chicken short a snack pack.
Im really going to dumb it down this time............actions speaks louder than words, I never said not to be nice to a woman, What Im saying is stop emphasizing how "nice" you are and how nice you are to women , most men who says they are nice guys, are usually doormats, insecure, whining losers or con artist.
Mother Teresa was one of the most kindest human beings in the world, I cant find a person who had a bad thing to say about her , the point is her actions dictated who she was, she never went around saying how nice she was or anything
Do you get it this time Egbert???and stop blaming the women because the bottom line is YOU picked them, YOU dated them, YOU, YOU , YOU..... time to take responsibility Jack and say Yeah I picked them maybe I need to learn the skills to meet quality women.
Just like the skill of shredding cheese wont teach you how to make home made macaroni and cheese, but its still a skill, and one of many that you must learn in order to make home made macaroni and cheese | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/29/2009 9:31:23 PM | Seems everything been said not that i makes you feel any better I know been there too but I can't hate women just the ones I know cause me undeserved pain. Just some info might help might not. I have traveled a lot in my life and find that not all people are the same different attitudes toward women and men exists in different areas of our country maybe you need a change of scenery. Where I live most women consider themselves gods gift but when I lived elsewhere women were more open and honest about who they were and what they wanted. I am not saying that all the women in my area were that way but to me that seemed the prevailing attitudes . If this works let me know in the mean time keep your head up looking down you can't really see where your going or where you been.  | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/29/2009 9:42:25 PM | Ok here is my choice making criteria.
1.Does she have time to devote to a relationship.
2.Do I find her attractive.
3.Are we mentally compatable.
4.are we sexually compatable.
5.Does she live in my city(dont do long distance)
6.Do we have the same taste in movies, music, etc etc.......
7.Does she not have kids or have older or adult kids..(I avoid those with younger kids.)
8.Does she show affection(not the same as sex).
9.Does she have male friends(I avoid that like death)
10.Does she like to go out all the time( High maintanance)
11.Does she drink alot( people do stupid things when drunk)
12.Is she faithful(go without saying but if the others are in check this is taken care of)
And all the women I enter a relationship with have these qualities AT FIRST!!!!!
only 2 have stayed true and one got deported and another got another job out of state only 3 months into our relationship and I aint movin out of a paid for house.
And I recently broke rule five but never again.
How is it even possible to have the answers to this list before a relationship? You sound very controlling and passive aggressive. Your list is ridiculous. You want to dictate her friends and time out? What you are looking for is you with female genitalia. It doesn't work that way.
Get a dog instead. If you have not figured out why you are struggling with women, you need to go to counseling more often.
It is not women you are unhappy with, it is yourself. 
Kindness & love are the greatest of all things one can give?? where is the puke emoticon what kind of sappy saying is that??? is that what you say to your potential girlfriend? no wonder they run.
Do you have anymore touching, heart wrenching ,hallmark moment sayings ? You guys are cracking me up tonight lol:) | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/31/2009 11:32:11 AM | | Don't know why, but it seems so common that immature m/f's blame the opposite sex for their woes. The real truth is: people treat us how we want/ and or allow ourselves to be treated. Another thing people don't realize is the mirror principle-i.e. whatever we are not willing to heal or see in our own self is often what we attract someone in our life to show us. This does not necessarily mean Gal a attracts abuser man b bc she is secretly also abusive, but, it could mean that she needs to heal abuse issues from her past or vice versa for a man in relationship with a woman. All relationships are a chance to learn something about ourselves. Sooo, we can either ask the question, "what is my learning here?", or continually gripe and blame and then attract the same until we 'get it' | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/31/2009 3:54:56 PM |
Don't know why, but it seems so common that immature m/f's blame the opposite sex for their woes. The real truth is: people treat us how we want/ and or allow ourselves to be treated. Another thing people don't realize is the mirror principle-i.e. whatever we are not willing to heal or see in our own self is often what we attract someone in our life to show us. This does not necessarily mean Gal a attracts abuser man b bc she is secretly also abusive, but, it could mean that she needs to heal abuse issues from her past or vice versa for a man in relationship with a woman. All relationships are a chance to learn something about ourselves. Sooo, we can either ask the question, "what is my learning here?", or continually gripe and blame and then attract the same until we 'get it'
Wiyan, that is so on target.... It seems the OP, doesn't get that he is picking these women, and they are obviously attracted to him as well, for what ever thing they need to learn...
I have tried to get this very point across, and suggest he take the time to HEAL, because he is oozing so much hurt all over, that he doesn't realize he's splatter every single person with his poisoned, wound...
Those of us who are healed, can wash it off, while others who have big wounds of their own, are getting another dose confirming the hurt they already feel, and then their own hate and discontent swells an oozes more for them...
After an abusive relationship for 3 1/2 yrs I realized I had to get a reality check, and start learning to heal, and love me... This didn't teach me to hate men, or to see men as all bad, and messed up, but rather my picker had to be readjusted...
It doesn't magically get perfect after taking that healing time off, but IT GETS BETTER... Once a person gets the hang of things, then they start picking people to have good relationships with...
There is NO guarantee that a GOOD relationship will be a lasting one, because SH!T happens, however there is positive growth, and the ability to take time to heal some more, and get back out there with an optimistic attitude.
Great post Wiyan | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/31/2009 6:25:10 PM | Ok I already told you I dont thinks its me but for the sake of argument give me a pointer.
How the heck am I supposed to predict that a woman is being real with her emotions or is going to be another bait and switch?
What attracts me to a woman are the things I LIKE but I dont have the ability to read minds so How do I know if they are the type that cools off when the newness wears off?
You are right in the fact that I am picking them but where you fail to understand me is the fact that the problem starts when they NOLONGER show the traits that made me pick them in the first place.
Its like if you go to a diner and the food is great and the service is good and you go to that same diner for weeks, if you go there one day and the service is crappy and the food sucks is it your fault? or you've been going there for a month and they were open 9AM - 10PM and you show one day at 8PM and its closed is it your fault?
Like what grandma said what it takes to get them it takes to keep them.
I dont get with women who are flaky right off the bat, I dont change my script in the middle of the show. | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/31/2009 7:56:50 PM | What the hell are you talking about? is that another one of your Yoda Lingo? where do you come up with this sh1t? is it when your sitting' on the dock of the bay
Watching the tide roll away ...O just sitting' on the dock of the bay.....Wasting' time
Im going to send you a quarter so you can buy your self a clue, because you really don't get it tisk tisk tisk | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/31/2009 9:28:39 PM | | Hmmm so it appears that decent tall well built black guys in New York have the same fundamental issues with women as decent average height well built white guys on the west coast of Canada. I have made the observation that most women do not like well built nice guys but prefer slovenly assholes most of the time? what gives ladies? | |
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| Starting to hate women........
Posted: 7/31/2009 9:36:41 PM | | And why are most women boozehounds and alcoholics that have to go out and slut it up in the bars 4 nights a week anyway? It seems even when they have a decent man they can not break away from that lifestyle, damn shallow biatches. | |
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