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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > She WON'T DEFINE US...... how much MORE time should I give her?      Mod Threads Home login  
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 Author Thread: She WON'T DEFINE US...... how much MORE time should I give her?
 packleader

Joined: 8/18/2006
Msg: 99
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Let go...Move on
Posted: 7/23/2009 10:38:53 PM
Here is a novel thought................you already know that she is a nut case right..? You already know that this is not going to work for you right..?....You already know that her word is no good right..?....You already know that when you ask for your stuff back that it will end in confortation right..? SOLUTION.........Leave her and leave your STUFF and do it now and never look back and never talk to this nut case again....Do you have the guts to do this..?
She WON'T DEFINE US...... how much MORE time should I give her?
Posted: 7/24/2009 4:30:38 AM

Should I just enjoy it for what it is? (we're a couple, but she won't acknowledge we are) In the back of my mind, though, I know this could be a set-up for disappointment for myself, in the long-run. because my heart is invested already. I want a LTR, not a temp thing.

Should I give her more time in the meantime, with hope she may eventually acknowledge us?

Or should I take her non-answer as a deal-breaker and move on? (I don't want to be strung along if I'm just being used as temporary attention).


what the heck, OP. that was a long ass post! geeeeze!

you should dump her! you're just the guy she's hanging around with until a better guy comes along. that's why she hasn't defined the both of you and that's why she didn't introduce you to her family/friends!

tah dah!!!!!
 granz

Joined: 6/22/2009
Msg: 101
She WON'T DEFINE US...... how much MORE time should I give her?
Posted: 7/24/2009 4:51:30 PM
I'm pretty sure you should terminate this and move on, if only to spare yourself any further pain of having your expectations crushed. Someone who is this indecisive about a relationship clearly doesn't know what she wants, and needs more time (alone) to consider it before she attempts to date anyone else.
 dreamcandi

Joined: 2/17/2009
Msg: 102
She WON'T DEFINE US...... how much MORE time should I give her?
Posted: 7/24/2009 5:04:34 PM
Move on, she will NEVER change. Trust me. The longer you stay with her, the more hurt you'll be in the end. She is using you to feed her ego, and you will never get what you want from her. She likes you a little, but not nearly enough to form a relationship. The fact that she likes you more when you back off is proof positive of that. This all is glaringly obvious, to think anything else is idiocy.
 Wiyan

Joined: 12/8/2008
Msg: 103
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She WON'T DEFINE US...... how much MORE time should I give her?
Posted: 7/24/2009 5:26:44 PM
my apology for getting personal here but...If you are still having a physial relationship with her, that is only adding to your pain, bc you associate her with pleasure that is never totally fulfilled on all levels emotionally. Secondly, since she is not clearly choosing you as the one, it would be a good idea for you to get out there and hang out with other friends, and even (gasp!) be willing and open to meeting a new woman. On some level, she surely must know that would be an inevitable result of her indecision and lack of commitment towards you. It's possible she is not capable at this point of being on the recieving end of true love, due to her belief that she is unworthy of the real deal. Of course based on this story, it would be a good idea to look at that dynamic within your own self concept as well, and redetermine if that is the ceiling which limits you in realtionships. Good luck to you treuanon :)
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