| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/14/2009 8:51:09 AM | My impression is that OP believes when she sleeps with a man that he wants a relationship when he really wants a booty call... now I agree that sexual deviants are a different catagory of from what she is really trying to describe.
OP the only fault with a woman in this situation is that she falls for the words and not the actions of a man who just wants sex from them.... just have to take your time getting to know them... and the other thing is sometimes we change our mind about "who" we might want a relationship with. In that situation enjoy what you had including the sex. It is what it is.... but if you are feeling used maybe you need to step back and regroup. Because right now I can see how you might perceive the men out there as just wanting one thing from you. So stop dating for awhile... do things with friends who care about you and will help build you up before dating again... | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/14/2009 9:04:40 AM |
IMO, it's the sense of empowerment and "male animal pride" thing! It's look at how many I have gotten, even if no one else knows about it!
Dear female person; "male animal pride?" Ok, Ill jump in. In my short 10 year career I placed 7 subjects of this matter in jail for sexual assault. 5 of them were women, 1 for molesting an 8 year old female repeatedly, and the others for young boys. I may be going out on a limb here, but I'm quite sure females must also have a bit of your so called "male animal pride." Most have started in the 60's right?? You can always blame anything on the 60's. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/15/2009 11:50:26 PM |
If you fell for one once, then you need to adjust your radar and have better judgment.
No radar in the world good enough to protect you from a sociopath. They're terrific liars -- it's their stock in trade. But the neat thing is: they're very impatient. If you go s-l-o-w enough, they'll out themselves. I believe they're related to Rumpelstiltskin. . . .
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 1:22:06 AM |
What do sexual preditors, perverts, p;ayers, cheaters, get out of this kind of life style? Other than the thrill of the conquest. Isn't it a very empty shallow life with no real fullfillment or happiness?
i have no idea. what do you get out of that lifestyle?
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 1:23:09 AM |
What do sexual preditors, perverts, p;ayers, cheaters, get out of this kind of life style? Other than the thrill of the conquest. Isn't it a very empty shallow life with no real fullfillment or happiness?
i have no idea. what do you get out of that lifestyle?
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 1:24:15 AM |
What do sexual preditors, perverts, p;ayers, cheaters, get out of this kind of life style? Other than the thrill of the conquest. Isn't it a very empty shallow life with no real fullfillment or happiness?
i have no idea. what do you get out of that lifestyle?
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 1:28:31 AM | Ok, whether you define someone as a pervert is highly subjective, similarly with the other terms you use.
If you're talking about someone who is looking for control, power and uses unfair methods to manipulate their conquests, with no regard for other peoples feelings, or responsibiity for the consequences of their actions.....there will always be people like this, you just have to get wiser at recognising them.
If you're talking about consensual pleasure seeking for pleasure seeking's sake, then people do this just simply for that reason....pleasure. Some people get pleasure from no strings sex, some people don't. I don't see any harm in either point of view on consensual pleasure seeking. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 1:35:57 AM | | I believe that it is dangerous to lump them all together, there is no definable characteristic in any lifestyle to support such idealism. The only common denominator is selfishness. Sexual predators, in particular, should be in their own category alltogether. There is no brilliant answer to this query, because its too subjective and case-specific, enough said. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 2:56:02 AM | One of my favourite albums of all time "Greeting from LA" by Tim Buckley sings: "I had to be the hunter again, this little man, had to try, to make love feel new again"
Is it fulfilling for men or women? It fills a need. Their need.
We all have choices, and need to be pro-active in not giving ourselves to anyone that just feeds us a line. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 5:02:05 PM | Sadly jewels the majority of people I come across oh the web are pigs. Let me define pig. Someone who comes on too strong with sexual innuendos. Others pretended to be nice gentlemen until they got what they wanted and then moved on to another victim. I have had friends who have been approached and fooled by the same men. We had to team up and weed out the jerks who were playing us. Please don't assume I am stupid for not recognizing these losers. They are very cunning and masters at what they do. Yes in the end they have nothing to show for their insensitive sexual prowling life style. There is no defense for these type of people.
Two consenting adults who want to play around to get off for pleasure is their personal choice, and they have a right to do that. How ever if they do do that they are sending a message to kids its okay to have sex for pleasure. Where does the morality part come in? Yes there are porno shops, stripe clubs, porno magazines and lots of sexual things out there to entertain people. Its all fine and dandy but those people who prefer that should stick with people who prefer that. Not prey on those that are not into sex just to get off. Some people actually want a relationship that involves love and monogamy and commitment along with great sex. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 5:27:23 PM | There is a HUGE difference between someone who likes to lick shoes in the privacy of their own home while being swatted on the bum for not licking fast enough ( in your mind perhaps a pervert) and someone who wants to sleep with whoever is willing....
Your question asked what do people who areBlah blah blah all the things you listed get out of that lifestyle......
Your answer is ....it isnt a lifestyle. Those groups of people are not related.
Im not in any of those groups you mentioned but its a simple matter for me to not respond or to be politely dismissive to people who are. They make no impact on my life. The fact that you seem to have such anger towards them seems sad to me. And lumping them in with people who take actions that actually do harm others ( cheaters and pedos) seems wrong its self. And thats my personal opinion
Oh ya and if you didnt know women used to be forced into treatment if they actually had orgasms .... that was a sort of perversion at one time. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 6:03:37 PM | Sexual predator: Probably a rapist or molester: I'm not one so I don't know...little or no conscience?
Player: The thrill of the chase I would suspect.
Cheater: Shallow life, shallow partner, a pig...every cheater has their reasons.
Pervert: One person's pervert is another persons slave. Impossible to define. Some people think a BJ is perverted.
all can be miserable, all can be happy. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 6:07:31 PM | "And NO, I don't want to hear your hate speech or justification for thinking that your rape fantasies aren't pathological in nature. We're all entitled to our opinion...you have yours, I have mine."
The shut-up and don't tell people you don't want te hear their justification for their way of thinking. (Not wanting to hear the hate speech is quite valid.) | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 6:09:41 PM | What do sexual preditors, perverts, p;ayers, cheaters, get out of this kind of life style? Other than the thrill of the conquest. Isn't it a very empty shallow life with no real fullfillment or happiness?
Unlike people in a loveless, worthless marraige. Stucke there with a person they used to love but can no longer stand. At least players are honest about themselves. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 6:13:13 PM | Really dawn1114!! So tell me how many women do you see behaving in the manner the OP describes?!? I would love to see where you found the stats on the ratio of men to women who are sexual predators, perverts, players, and cheaters! Not saying women don't do this but chances are the ratio is outweighed by men.
Oh and if your really read my post as it is ment - the word c*ck is subsequently used metaphorically to adjoin the sexual aspect of the subject to the forefront!
Gee...I haven't read about any women teachers being arrested for having sex with their under-age students for several months. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/16/2009 6:18:42 PM | Pixie dust If only it were that easy to keep away from such people. The problem is not that simple. There is not a whole bunch of nice guys nice people to pick from. Besides why is it the womans Fault because there are so many rude people out there who don't care how they act or what they say or do?
Well OP...thread search "Nice Guy" there are planty of them always whining that women want nothing to do with them.
Another thing, unfortunatley a lot of guys seem to think that if you state you are sensual in your profile then that means you like to give it up. I'm not saying they're right, they are not, but there it is. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/17/2009 1:19:30 AM |
What do sexual preditors, perverts, p;ayers, cheaters, get out of this kind of life style? Other than the thrill of the conquest. Isn't it a very empty shallow life with no real fullfillment or happiness?
They are very cunning and masters at what they do. Yes in the end they have nothing to show for their insensitive sexual prowling life style. There is no defense for these type of people.
It would seem you have answered your own question.
Please don't assume I am stupid for not recognizing these losers
I assume nothing. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/17/2009 1:30:37 AM | hmmm... if anyone could come up with a REAL answer, it might be interesting... instead everyone is trying to equate thousands of years of human instinct and DNA programming into politically correct, current-day belief and value systems.
some philosophers have stated that all things in life are sexual in nature... directly or indirectly.
what is shallow to one, is fulfilling to another... only you can decide for yourself what is best for you.
coloring your hair, wearing high heels, dolling yourself up, wearing make-up could also be determined as shallow, right? or is it also sexual in nature? | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/17/2009 3:27:31 AM | How can dolling yourself up with make up , high heels and a trip to the hairdressers be shallow . Women want to look good and feel good about themselves when they go out . We all want to be accepted in our peer groups and be seen to be keeping up with what's in fashion .
The reason that there are so many deviants out there I think the question was . Why this is so first has to establish what is a deviant ? What is offensive to one is fun to another. My advice is if you don't want to get wet , don't stand out in the rain . | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/17/2009 4:41:32 AM | I don't think anyone that isn't a predator, molester, or otherwise sexually charged criminal can ever understand what these types of people get out of it. You can't figure out why they think it's satisfying or "good" because you think it's horrible, immoral, wrong, and evil. And with good cause.
Dunno anything about cheating as I've never done it, although my mind has wandered here and there. Grass is always greener type thinking maybe? I've never really been into sex as a strictly recreational thing, so the whole player attitude is beyond me. I'm a romantic I guess. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/17/2009 5:29:35 AM | Well, starting with the fact that just a few on here might masturbate once or twice would indicate that sometimes we enjoy sexual gratification. If you are not in a perfect relationship or single, perhaps you are still looking for a better mix of Love and sex. Quick thrills with strangers... perhaps but for those who need that aspect it is better than being alone. and to acknowledge that although you are both in search of someone you haven't found, you are afterall consenting adults and it might be nice to spend some time naked and sweaty and hopeful careful about it. I would like to think we are able to acknowledge that although we like a person they may not be marriage material. Many find that out after they are living together. Otherwise we would be married right away to someone we hardly know only to find out she only lies there with no passion of her own or perhaps you would marry someone to find out he has terrble hygiene and are repulsed to be next to him. Personally I think recreational sex is valuable in many ways to many people. whether they are alone or learning to be better lovers or experimenting so they won't get through seven years of marriage and say "I would really like to have a back man for one night...." As for long term, I am in my third serious effort and second marriage... I say it is not about sex at all and all about whether or not we want to stay together. I tell many I have not gotten any better at picking my partners. I am just getting better at understanding them and compromising. She is not the most sexually adventurous although it gets better as we go, but she is the most I ever connected with and have tried the hardest to keep happy even when she is wrong in the argument. That said... She is learning that if I am happy and yes that might mean waking me with a stellar bJ or finding the energy to have a nice ending to a long day it greatly increases the chance of evrybody having a better day the next day and trying harder still to make it all work. Ten years later I think we have it figured out. I surprise her ewith nights out and do my chores and I get laid. She surprises me with naked welcomings after work and well the house could be a mess and I would still love her and I would want to do my chores without being nagged at. Because she wants to make me happy, I want to make her happy... or you can try the common approach of stand off. which frquently ends in divorce or single.
Many are wondering why this is herein this thread... Well I am thinking this thread is very little to do with why you like sex as much as why can't we all fall in love, get married then have sex. I think I rambled a bit. sorry. I should just go masturbate, but its ok . I have a long term relationship going with my right hand.LOL | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/17/2009 7:15:15 AM |
So my questios still stands and yes the forum is mostly deffensive attackers getting their jollies out of ganging up on someone with a ligitimate question.
Your argument, or should I say your question has a huge flaw because it gangs together a whole range of behavior that has absolutely nothing to do together. It's like saying what is wrong with smokers, terrorist and rapist. By association I am turning a smoker into something comparable to a terrorist. | |
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| This is a loaded question but alot of people wonder about this
Posted: 7/17/2009 7:50:45 AM | | My question may seem broad and not seem like the words don't relate to one another. Its more of a question or maybe wondering why it is there are so many that only want to have sex and not feel a connected in anyway. TO me that is so odd. Yes I have had one night stands and had sex for pleasure but after it was over I felt very uncomfortable about sharing my intimate self with a stranger. Maybe I am old fashion or my morals play a part in this question. Instant gradification does not out way the feeling afterwords of this sad empliness that follows. I am not the only on who feels this way, and to blame me is just so not right but its a free speach forum and everyone is entitled to their opinions right or wrong. The reason it bothers me is that its so hard to find a decent person who actually wants more than instant gradification with no attachment. If it were easy I would not be so bewildered by the amount of people who don't want that. The percentage is so high for casual no strings attached sex that I wonder if its worth the effort to be on dating sites. | |
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