| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/17/2009 10:23:29 PM | Hey man u not the only single dad going through this thing, im a 44 year old single dad of two under 5, i also have found that it is very difficult to find someone that is willing to accept that at my vintage, i am looking after little people and love doing it, but to be realistic most woman my age have older kids and dont really want to get involved with a man who has taken responsibility of caring and raising his children for what ever reason, but the most important thing to remember is that no matter what else happens the kids will always love u, just look at their smiling faces,
hang in there brother | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/17/2009 11:04:21 PM | Jenn8800
I don't feel sorry for myself
my ex chose to leave him
courts gave me custody because she didn't show (no she wasn't hurt she was talking to her bf in california on the phone
the only reason he is still in her life is because I keep it that way but he is getting older and starting to see the truth for himself
I don't get nor did I ask for child support
Maybe you've had a really bad experince with these matters yourself or not but your logic on this is extremely flawed . | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/17/2009 11:56:30 PM | Gday mate,
i can relate to what you say as i am also a single dad with 4 at home.
woman say your so wonderful and caring you must be a good man to do that and put life on hold for your kids, and then when you ask them to would they like to go out it is like you asked them for a million dollaers and we answers like :we have rared our kids or not going throught that again: and no body ever mentioned getting married only a date . my sypathies lie you mate! i post an artical similar recently on her. im in australia and the same here
ian | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/18/2009 12:07:40 AM | | I think a lot of women consciously or unconsciously fear being seen as the wicked step mother. Also, they might assume your children are close with their mother, and a new woman might be seen as an intrusion. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/18/2009 6:22:06 AM | | There are lots of reasons some women will not date a single father and for the group of women that do not want to date a single father that is up to them, because lots of the reasons are valide. Now there are women that will still date single parents, but it is a smaller pool. Men and women both want some quality together time, be sure you can provide some of that. Also keep doors open. I find married women have the least probles with the fact I have kids, as long as they get some together time we are both happy. Also stay fit and thin, I see lots of people posting about who will or will not date a single parent and when I look at the pic I think "is being a parent the real problem". Look good or have a big bank account. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/18/2009 11:52:10 AM | | Just because I have full custody of my daughter doesn't mean I don't have to give my ex money. I still have to give her almost 700 a month for only having my daughter 8 days. Why don't you tell me that is fair because it is not it is bull sh.. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/18/2009 12:07:26 PM | I'm amazed how many full time dads are out there. Think I've only come across one and that was a friend I've known from the past.
I would consider dating one. I think it's quite sweet.
Guess it's just harder to get out there. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/19/2009 10:31:14 PM | | Hmmm maybe you are meeting the wrong women. Yes I thing haveing an attraction is very inportant when trying to date someone. But to me I would date a full time single father. My x was a full time father it didnt work out because he didnt want to involve me with his children so how were we sapose to grow. But either way I think the ladys should get use to the idea of single fathers being around because there are more then what there use to be and its hella hard work.(being a single father or mother) | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/21/2009 4:42:35 PM | Well I just finished reading the whole three pages of threads, and wow first time on forum, the anger is wild.
OP, just a fact of life, keep your integrity in check and the right woman will be there when you're ready, we attract our reciprocal.
As for me I'm on here to meet people (women), to interact because I have limited social network because between my boys and work I don't have time to hang out!!!
I'm in a similar situation, my ex left moved to a city 5 hours away, I shoulder the matrimonial debt, she sees our boys 3 days a month which I have to provide transportation for. She's never paid a cent in child support, yet I pay $2000.00/month in spousal allowance!!! I'm not whining I'm making it work but it's hard not to think WTF!!!!
As for that Jen character!!!! What a ****, sounds like some kind of rightious, my shit don't stink, person who's is so close minded I'm amazed she still is happily married or is she, ask her husband!!!!
That's my rant, keep your chin up dude!
P.S. Oh! And my kids are honor roll, active in sports and disciplined(unless they're with their mom, then all he'll breaks loose and I have to referee), and they come to me as a friend concerning sex, alcohol, and drugs!!! | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/21/2009 5:03:23 PM | | excuse me, but my ex was a drug addict that lived with a convicted felon after our divorce!it took the judge 15 minutes after hearing the social workers case file on living conditions at home.i got custody of my son when he was 11 and took full responsibility for raising him alone. yes, i dated and yes most of the women didn't take to my son. thats their loss. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/21/2009 5:52:50 PM | | My sons father chooses to see him 4 nights a month, I want him to see him more. But he doesn't want to. I prefer guys that take the responsibility for their children, rather than the ones that run miles away. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/22/2009 1:33:01 AM | Jenn the troll finally left the building...........
OP-I'm currently dating a single father who is a widower. One thing I've noticed is that when you both have children, you have responsibilities and it is not feasible to spend as much time as either of you would like to spend with each other. Thank God for the phone...lol.
Be patient and it will come but it does take longer to cultivate a relationship when one or both people have children but in some ways that is not a bad thing. It gives one time to think and assess the relationship and how content you are....in other words, the honeymoon phase is less intense. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/22/2009 6:07:38 AM | to the OP - easy answer.
Women do not really mean what they say...surely you have noticed this at some point in life...?
As to why they don't like it, there's a lot of women enamored with the Prince Charming fantasy. The prince didn't have kids. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/22/2009 6:32:45 AM | I doubt it has much to do with your kids, OP.
Because I know if I were a single father, women would still be throwing themselves at me.
The people without kids post threads like this fairly often in the other forums as well.
One of my gorgeous friends right now is dating a single father. Why? Because he's attractive and funny.
She didn't like dudes with kids before him.
While I would never date a woman with kids, not everyone is as adamant about it as I am.
What it really comes down to is - what do you have to offer?
Seems like your self esteem sucks azz.
I'm not modest. Modesty is boring. I'm crazy, and interesting, and fun. As a result, I get propositioned everywhere I go.
Don't blame your kids for not having an attractive personality. That said, it will just take patience.
There are ALWAYS compatible people out there for every personality type. For those with less attractive personalities, it just takes more time to find them. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/22/2009 9:48:09 AM |
Because I know if I were a single father, women would still be throwing themselves at me.
Don't go making any bets on that one 8sf8......there are plenty of attractive, confident single dads (without your arrogance  ) who find it difficult to do more than simply date a woman because of their status as single father.
I'm not sure where you get the impression that the OP doesn't have an attractive personality....do you know him personally? Besides which attractiveness is very much in the eyes/ears/heart of the beholder of another. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/22/2009 1:20:39 PM | As for me and what seems to be a common sediment amoungst single women who don't have children but want a family...we do not want our future children to have to share their father or his resources with another women's children....simple as that.
If you decided to go ahead with the having of the child then the parents should be married, otherwise there are other options out there. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/22/2009 3:35:46 PM | | I was a single parent for 15 years, so I do understand. It's hard work, exspecially when the kids are younger. I found that dating guys who had kids (fulltime or not) worked better as their was an understanding. I have three kids from a previos relationship that I still keep in contact with. They have a mom and my boys have a dad. If you are going for the relationship you need to find someone who can be their friend and help with guiding not someone who feels that they have to be mom. Your kids look old enough from your photo that they know and understand what is going on. And any woman who can not see you for who u are, was not the right one in the first place. Don't give up!! | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/22/2009 5:40:25 PM | | I often include "has children" when I search. I can not help but think such a guy will understand my lifestyle better. You are much younger and I suspect younger women (especially those with no children of their own) may be more likely to shy away. They don't want to be a step, they may fear you will not want more kids, they may want the flexibility of a relationship with someone without kids as well. The older you get the fewer people there are out there who don't have kids! I know you are talking specific to full custody dads and in your case apparently the ex does nto ever take the kids for visitaiton even-- I suspect it is about as hard for you as it is for women who are full time mom's with no visitation arrangements. You will no doubt meet the right person eventually. You don't want to date anyone who has issues with your family. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/22/2009 7:29:30 PM | Jenn8800. take it easy! you just torched the poor guy without even knowing the details of his divorce and custody experience. i can only speak for myself: i just procured custody of my son just last summer. he was 17 and he had tired of his mother behavior and the mismanagement of the chid support i was paying her. i was paying
$700 a month and over a 13 year period i paid over $90,000. i cant verify it but i doubt that 10% of those funds went to the care of my son. i paid for his clothes, shoes, toys, games, dinners etc. Rather then take her back to court and have my son tell a judge that he wanted to live with me, i just focused on keeping his self esteem high, giving hime direction, guidance and most importantly, love. he just graduated from high school and will be starting college within the next month and not a day passes without me telling me that i love him a many times a day. now i myself am hoping to meet someone special myself, it just takes time. i guess that i'm just asking you not to lump all of us together. some of us are really good guys. we're just looking for happiness just like everyone else. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/22/2009 7:41:13 PM | | Dating a single parent is work. They don't have the same time as a childless person does. This would be true, with a work-a-holic. OP how are you putting yourself out there? I don't think your screen name helps any to be burtally honest. It says I'm either desperate or clingy. Both are bad. Do you think it might be yourself confidence that is shaken a bit and this is what women are picking up on. I notice when I'm confident and happy with myself women graviate to me. When, I become bashful, a state that I'm in now, women are repulsed by me. I wouldn't worry about it too, much, enjoy the roller coaster, because you'll be heading up hill again soon. | |
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| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/22/2009 7:45:48 PM |
I miss Jenn, although a bit harse, there was truth to be in what she said, I am sure she will be back
There wasn't any real truth in what she said. She made blanket assumptions, insulted people and called posters derogatory names. I'm not glad she's gone, because I really wanted to debate with her and do something that the others here might perceive as a good use of my "negative personality traits". | |
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