| My only suggestion is to keep trying
Posted: 7/23/2009 8:31:48 PM | | It takes longer when as a full-time single father we focus on our kids and fit in dating when we can. As there is no alternative, enjoy your kids and in time you should meet somebody right for you. | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/23/2009 9:01:30 PM | I think that being single in itself is a hard situation for some people. When you are looking for someone to date you find qualities that you are looking for, and them the same..What weeds out the losers and people that just want to use you is the fact that you have children.. I would take that as a blessing and not an issue..Imagine all the bimbos you are saving yourself from..You already have children to raise on your own, I suppose you are not looking for another..
I feel bad that people feel the need to talk trash about anyone on any internet site..Especially when they are very obviously on here themselves..The shocker for me is seeing a happily married woman, with children on here...you know a SINGLES SITE...
I don't think it is fair to put all single parents in one classification.. When you go under a mans post and start trash talking single parents..hmm its pretty obvious you are talking about him and every other single parent....So when your husband divorces you for being on the singles sites are you gonna feel the same? Leave the single parent talk for the single parents, considering you have no experience in this type of situation.. | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/23/2009 10:36:29 PM |
But you're a loser single mother looking for a man on a cheapo freebie internet dating site so your obviously not the sharpest tool in the shed.
I think a lot of us women are here, single mothers, and here because it fits our lifestyle to date from an online stance than to go out into the bar scene. It lets us live a more responsible life to raise our kids.
BTW just wondering- Jenn, if you are so happily married with kids, WTF are you on here,
a cheapo freebie internet dating site . You should be giving your man/kids your attention! Geee, I would have to say that
your obviously not the sharpest tool in the shed.  | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/24/2009 3:18:45 PM | | I have been a single parent for many years now, my kids are all grown up, and the best decision I ever made was putting my children first. It scares me to think of the times I was going to put some else ahead of them, when they were not right for my children. I get a great sense of accomplishment to see them now as young adults. Are they perfect? Far from it, but I think they are going to be ok. As one of my sons just left for his second tour in Iraq, he hugged me looked me in the eye and said thank you for everything you did for me, I know it was not easy. Always, always always put your kids first, and you meet someone great, and if you don't, don't stress about it. | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/24/2009 9:11:55 PM | jenn8800
hi i am not sure who u think you are talking about on your little thread but not all signal parents are whinny or want shit from ppl sometimes all they want is a conversation with an adult instead of a child get a clue and mayb try it sometime | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/24/2009 11:15:14 PM | Wow that is pretty harsh. Look I have two kids by two different mom's. Yeah I made mistakes in my life but I got two beautiful gifts in return. I will say my oldest mom is a horrible mother. She wants nothing to do with my child but collect the child support. I have to fight just to see my child everyother weekend. I do things with my child. I teach her things and take her places that she will learn. Guess what I took her to court and had 22 people including her own family members get on the stand and say what a bad mother she was. Guess what the judge came up with. She gets to keep my child and I still only get to see her every other weekend. Oh and even though I took her to court he figured why not raise my child support even though it gets spent in the bar and not on my child. So I don't want to hear crap about the guy taking the child away from his mother. You do what is in the best interest of the child.
My youngest girls mom is a wonderful mom. She cares so much about our child I would never in my wildest dreams think of taking my child away from her. I give her more then what the child support is set at because I know the money will go to my little girl.
I am not trying to be a jerk but come on. Not every situation is the same. I find it hard just to find someone that will date me just because I have two kids. I say the hell with them. My girls are more important then anything in my life including myself. I don't want a mother for my children I already have that covered with their own mom. I don't even let a girl meet my kids one on one until they have been around a long time and I know they plan on sticking around.
Well have a great day and just know that not every guy is out there to take a child away from their mothers because we don't want to pay child support. My point is if women want their equal rights in life.....give us our equal rights in court. Stop taking us for all we are worth. | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/25/2009 5:05:34 AM | Back to the OP.
My theory is that women want a man to take care of them first, and then their children second. If a guy has his own kids... he's going to put them first. So the women who don't like dating dads are selfish women (more so than the average person).
I could use a lot more descriptive words, but it blurs the point. By "selfish" I mean the worst possible concept of the word. I'm thinking Cinderella here. And by the way.. where was Cinderella's dad during the whole story??
And as to that Jenn8800 idiot.. wtf is a married woman doing preaching on this site? I bet her closet is full of skeletons, or naked men hiding when her husband gets home early. | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/25/2009 5:44:23 AM |
My theory is that women want a man to take care of them first, and then their children second. If a guy has his own kids... he's going to put them first. So the women who don't like dating dads are selfish women (more so than the average person).
Oh Markus, you might get flamed for calling women selfish who don't want to date full-time fathers, even with the disclaimer in the paragraph. When a woman dares say that about a man who doesn't date single moms.....lol.
I do think you hit the nail on the head in the first part though.....when we are in an adult relationship, we want to be a priority in the life of our partner. When the children we have are ours biologically, we don't generally resent the times when the kids become #1 because we are in agreement.
Also, with so many stories out there of children sabatoging their parent's attempt to date someone, it is completely understandable why some people are adverse to taking that risk or have a preference not to date someone who has children.
One thing I have realized over the years on this forum is that a lot of people cannot think for themselves or see people as individuals....they live their life and perceive everyone around them through a stereotype. | |
|
| |
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/25/2009 8:34:23 PM | | not all women are alike. believe me. i think the most attractive thing is when a father steps up and takes care of his children. and i seem to be more attracted to a single father then anyone else, you have to give women a real chance and let them prove to you that we are not all a like. | |
|
| |
| |
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/25/2009 9:07:56 PM | | OP, it says you're divorced?? The Mom isn't in the picture at all? You are a heavy smoker, maybe thats why Moms don't want to date you. Can't have you smoking around my kid........or me for that matter. | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 7/25/2009 10:41:07 PM | I'm not sure that kids are such a lodestone. I mean - I've got way more baggage handling issues and precipices to leap than simply having urchins to step over. People still seem somewhat okay with crawling through the desert of broken glass.
My guess is that all the little things that provide early interest, sustained hope and a dash of fun probably have to be respected. I read someone's blog on this a few years back. He emphasized taking up a sport to provide some fluidity of movement, good dental care, great hygiene, simple and honest communication, occasionally good grooming and fitting clothes. Living somewhere that has a lot of single girls probably doesn't hurt - like move into the downtown of any government berg. I don't know if that all works - . but there are rumours, - mostly from lasses. | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 10/29/2009 8:16:17 AM | Jenn8800. WOW
You are a keeper! Let me guess, the court just decided to give full custody to the man because you had your stuff so together? Drugs or alcohol? Maybe this community can put in a poll to determine what substance you decided was better than your own kids. Maybe it was something else. Complete wack-job? Bi-polar?
Hell you could be in your own category. You really have only two choices here. Fix yourself or just keep partying. Don't be ticked at the other parent wanting their children to grow up without substance abuse and sanity issues.
No really! You are a keeper! | |
|
| |
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 10/29/2009 5:57:41 PM | The logistics of dating someone with kids is difficult enough when they don't have full custody. When they do have full custody if the kids aren't older, it is nearly impossible.
I am not averse to dating someone with kids as I have one myself, but I find it easier to date men without kids simply because it is easier for them to be available when I am available. | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 10/29/2009 6:12:10 PM | | My ex had a child (and full custody) when I met him and I raised her as my own for 10 yrs - even putting up with him much longer because of her. Since then, I have been in 2 shorter relationships and one of those men had a child and full custody. It was never a problem for me. It actually made things a lot easier because he understood so much that someone without kids wouldn't have. Now, I think I would rather date men with kids and if they have custody that would be even better. | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 10/30/2009 7:25:53 PM | lonleydad, I feel for ya, I too am a single dad with custody. Someone said it(dont know who)" people dont date single parents due to unknown variables". Keep on truckin, every dog has their day...
As for that ""exploitative bleep bleep"" Jenn88, I will gladly be put into your category of ripping my kids from my ex, once she started her "vacations" in county for warrants, drugs, drunk in public, HELL YEAH I took them with a F'N quickness!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(sorry for the loud and harshness)
She has been clean and responsible for four years now. And I have watched her closely with the kids and the law, I decided to let them stay with her for this year.
I think we "You fulltime custodial PARENTS who ripped YOUR CHILDREN away from thier loving NON CUSTODIAL PARENTS" who did it for the kids sake or the ones whos "others" walk out should go ahead and pat ourselves on the back, in fact, I salute you all!! Cause we put our lives on hold for our kids and for that.....WE ROCK
Yes it does suck, no life, no significant other, little or no money, but look at it like this. I am willing to bet when our kids grow up, they will realize what we have done(sacafices, hardships) for thier good.I hope!! | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 10/30/2009 7:34:02 PM | Oh, and just to throw in my other twocents, I prefer to date women with kids. It seems most childless women I have come across (no matter how we met, age,mentality) just dont comprehend what its like to e a single parent. I dont know why, and Im not even going to try and figure it out. As the Beatles said "Let It Be"! Thats my preference..
The JimmyJames | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 10/30/2009 7:40:35 PM |
Oh, and just to throw in my other twocents, I prefer to date women with kids. It seems most childless women I have come across (no matter how we met, age,mentality) just dont comprehend what its like to e a single parent. I dont know why, and Im not even going to try and figure it out. As the Beatles said "Let It Be"! Thats my preference..
Seems that way, single parents should date single parents. Better chance of a match that will work. | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 10/30/2009 8:40:12 PM | I've dated men raising their kids and men who don't have kids, and the one thing that seems to hold true is that people are who they are, kids or not. In time their true colors show -- and you find out what kind of person they are inside themselves, and thats where you have to decide if they are the kind of person you want in your life.
As a single parent myself, I do think that its hard to totally get what it means to be a parent if you haven't experienced it for yourself. Like anything in life, we can empathize but its hard to really understand an experience we haven't lived for ourselves. As for dating, I don't really agree that people should limit who they meet based on the fact of whether or not they have children...someone can be a thoughtful caring person without kids and another can have kids but be the biggest jerk you'll ever come across in an intimate relationship. Its really about the personality and values of the person you are interacting with -- another single parent may be able to relate to your circumstances more easily, but whether or not someone has kids shouldn't have more impact than who they are as a person. Its a big world, all kinds of people out there (as evidenced by the posts in this forum. lol) and the best way to find out if someone has the traits you want in someone is to get to know them. I know it can be discouraging and isn't easy -- I'm in the same position -- but if going thru the b.s. and disappointments gets me to something real and amazing in the end, I think its worth it. And at least those bad dates and odd encounters give us something to laugh about with our friends. : ) Hang in there, be true to yourself, and know there are alot of people that feel you and wish you the best! | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 10/30/2009 9:04:24 PM | Did anyone not notice that Jenn8000 deleted her account anyway? Sounds to me like she was very bitter, and probably treats her husband the same way she treats others, so no doubt she will be a single parent on here at some point whining that he divorced her because of her attitude, cuz if I were a man married to someone like that I would be out the door.
People who treat others that nasty, are generally that nasty in real life, not just on the internet. | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 10/30/2009 9:20:46 PM | There is a full time single dad who lives a couple houses down from me and all the single women in my neighborhood ostracise him because he was in a bitter custody battle and took his kids away from thier mother. He spent over $50,000 in legal fees. I know his ex and there is nothing wrong with her. All the women talk crap about him they say that he is evil and manipulative. They look at him like he is a total scumbag creep.
Women have a a strong primal attachment to thier children and they couldnt imagine the thought of losing thier kids, so I can see why they would be extremly reluctant to date a man who took the kids away from thier mother. They would be instinctivly repulsed by him and would be afraid to have children with him because he would do the same thing to her as he did to his ex. | |
|
| Why do women not like dating fulltime single fathers?
Posted: 10/30/2009 9:31:20 PM | | not all single dads TOOK the kids. I for one, had no lawyer and spent no money, she gave them up cause she gave up and decided she didn't want to be a mom, etc, etc. If you've read my post you already know my story, if not look at my post history. But I see your point, most people tthat see a dad raising kids, see a man that ripped them from their mother. My 13 yr old would tell you different, she is hers not mine but I have custody of her too. And if I didn't she would be with me anyway. She even told me, please don't let me have to live with her. | |
|
Home
login 
