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Posted: 8/2/2009 12:40:54 AM | ^ I agree with Spikey Fridge.
I take it one step up and ask the guy to call one day ahead to confirm. If he doesn't do so, I take it as cancelled. | |
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Posted: 8/2/2009 1:18:26 AM | OP I had a date once from another dating site, that was not there when I arrived. I waited a few minutes and went to the ladies room. When I came out he was pacing the floor outside, very anxious. I walked up to him and he told me he couldn't stay because he was an inspector and called to a water break in one of the major city lines. He was sorry and had to go. I told him no problem. But then he looked at me for about 60 odd seconds, just staring at me. "Don't you need to go" I said. He said he had time for one drink. I thought that was odd whilst an entire city was waiting on him that he should take the time to have a drink. While we were having that one drink ( me a coke) his phone rang off the hook. He finally turned it off. Again I found this strange. Finally, I told him he HAD to go. He walked me to my car and tried to kiss me. I actually pulled away. He apologized saying it was his culture to kiss someone goodbye. He was Peruvian. He was also married, my guess, and his wife wanted him home.
When a guy doesn't show, it is because he is either married, has a SO who was wanting their time, at that time, or he actually did show up but saw you, didn't like what he saw (my guy friends have done this to several women) and bailed before you could see him. He could also have received a better offer moments before the date. Yes, some men do this. I am serious OP. I have had my guy friends call me and ask what they should do claiming the "chick" was too fat or too ugly. I always tell them to go inside, spend five minutes and let them know it is not a match for them but they never listen, they bail. One of my friends atually told me he was hiding behind a tree so she wouldn't see him.....geesh!
Consider yourself forwarned about his personality and don't attempt anymore contact...to engage with him any further means you are disrespecting yourself. | |
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Posted: 8/2/2009 8:57:47 AM | I would never wait more than 30 minutes for a guy to show up. Around 15 minutes and I would think they should have called if they were coming. However, not everyone has a cell phone. I don't have a cell and it stinks when you're going out, not knowing what's going on. Then have the person's phone number on hand so you can call them from a pay phone or if you're the one late, call the restaurant and have them look for the person and let them know. If someone can't do this for you, they aren't very interested.
I would not call or email if they don't show up. Just move on.
People get nervous, have no manners, are too scared to call and say anything, who knows. It doesn't even matter once you've been stood up. There are very few real excuses that would make up for being stood up. | |
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Posted: 8/6/2009 10:03:33 PM | If a guy and I have plans to meet, regardless of whether or not it's a first time, I wait only 15 minutes, tops. If he shows up after that and I've gone, he can try reaching me to explain why he was late. Some might complain I didn't wait, but I then say "sorry, I don't wait longer than that."
If he doesn't try to reach me at all, I've lost nothing. | |
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Posted: 8/6/2009 11:00:14 PM | I think you did well by staying and waiting for about 20 minutes. You never know what could of happend.
Now that you do of course. | |
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Posted: 8/7/2009 1:20:01 AM | | regardless the reason, WHATEVER it was, actions spoke louder than words, dont call, dont email, dont anything hun, not worth ur energy, plenty of fishes in the sea ;) | |
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Posted: 8/7/2009 10:25:49 AM | His Wife/Girlfriend probably wouldn't let him go out. 
Seriously, there are a number of reasons one can't show up, but not calling if it wasn't a medical emergency is inexcusable.
This is NOT the way you want to start a relationship, so I'd move on until you find someone that will treat you like a lady. | |
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Posted: 8/7/2009 2:35:58 PM |
Oh my...he was in a car accident on the way there. I am glad I got an explanation but sorry he got hurt. Thanks for all of your help.
^^^^^^ It's amazing that people are still posting about the original post without reading the full thread.
The OP just posted that he was in a car accident on the way to meet her and he got hurt.
And he gave her an explanation...
People please read the entire post before making a judgement. | |
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Posted: 8/7/2009 3:51:42 PM |
GeminiMan66 :^^^^^^ It's amazing that people are still posting about the original post without reading the full thread.
It's not amazing at all. Especially with multipage threads.
I tend to read the Op (original post), and then skim through the rest of them, sometimes skipping entire pages if it's more than say, a half dozen pages long, and add my comments.
Who has the time to read every post?
This forum software is limited in that you cannot edit posts once the 15 minute (approximately, thats a guess) courtesy edit time has passed, therefore there is no way to modify the original post.
That might be a good thing to have... | |
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Posted: 8/7/2009 5:19:04 PM | 1. If someone stands me up, and i hear nothing back from them in a day (yes, give it a few hours to see if something really happened thats legit, sometimes it does), then i move on. Sorry but if i don't hear back after a day im going to assume they took one look at me and was not interested. But don't take it personal if thats the case, because a lot of immature guys have a lot to learn about how to RESPECT another human being. Sadly, some guys are egotistical that way, and go after the chase of getting a number, not to really be interested in it. Maybe it was a joke, a mean one if that!. But another reason could be 1) do they secretly have a girlfriend and they couldn't find the time...or 2) did they chicken out?
2) I would not hesitate to call within the hour and see if something is wrong. If you get no reply within 10-20 minutes, then its safe to assume they aren't coming. IF someone is really that interested in seeing you, they will let you know.
3) A sane person would not make plans and stand you up, unless an emergency but they would have the decency to tell you before hand. It sounds like you just contacted an immature idiot. You are worth far more than that. He is not worth your time.....your time is more precious. | |
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Posted: 8/7/2009 5:20:33 PM | | BTW i just now read he was in a car accident. I am sorry. But either way, never know.....just warning some other people incase they do get stood up by idiots. | |
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Posted: 8/7/2009 6:29:32 PM | This happened to me Sunday. We made plans to meet at a 2:30 movie. He was to call me before he left his house. He didn't call. I called him at 2:00 went straight to voice mail!. At 10:00pm I get a text that said "sorry about today I feel asleep". WTF I understand people fall asleep but a Text!! Not even a phone call to explain?
Too bad about the accident tho. That is an excuse that would work. Hope he didn't text it to you. lol dee | |
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