| MAIL (MALE) ORDER BRIDE!!
Posted: 7/18/2009 4:53:13 AM | I don't know what a Romance Tour is to be honest. Personally I wouldn't want to have to BUY myself a wife. Also, I have had girlfriends from Africa, Jamaica, America and a few other places (that I have met legitimately as they lived near me - not mail order) and I can't rightfully say that any of them had inherent traits due to their nationality that made them overwhelmingly different from English women. Of course everyone is an individual, but globally people probably have more in common than they do differentiating them.
A woman who you buy and "rescue" from poverty might be grateful at first, but after a while of being together a woman is just a woman, a man is just a man. Everyone gets angry, annoyed, bored, irritable etc. You are going to have all the same tiffs and problems (and hopefully joyous occasions) as you do with someone from your own country. I think to imagine that people of any nationality are one homogeneous group who all act the same is a recipe for disaster. Ultimately it's going to come down to chemistry and whether you love each other.
I have heard from people who advocate arranged marriages (men and women) that even if you don't know someone you can grow to love through being together, even if you didn't initially marry for love. It's a theory, and it might be true, but I can't say it sits comfortably with me and I wouldn't particularly like to test out the theory in my own marriage.
On a lighter note: If any rich women want to buy me, I am happy to oblige and I promise that I will be grateful to you from rescuing me from my current state of poverty and I will be a gentleman and the perfect husband. Any nationality can apply! | |
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tm1971
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Joined: 5/22/2009
Msg: 27 | |
| MALE ORDER BRIDE!!
Posted: 7/18/2009 4:58:40 AM | My ex husband is marrying a polish girl this year and she is lovely. But it has come to the point where she would prefer him not to have anymore contact with me or my daughter, I have no qualms about that. But I will never have a bad word to say about her she is lovely.
I guess that to a degree you would find both types of women from Eastern Europe, the problem with men (majority of men) who tend to date and marry these girls see only one thing, a pretty girl who would idolise them. lol mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!
I am south african and would never date or marry south african men as quite frankly they are brutes, but that is my personal choice. | |
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| MAIL (MALE) ORDER BRIDE!!
Posted: 7/18/2009 5:01:21 AM | There are guys who seek out women to "rescue them from poverty" - gold-diggers are not just of the female persuasion.
Woman also need to radar out gold digging men, so, guys, don't feel that you are the only ones. | |
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Posted: 7/18/2009 5:05:46 AM | Well sure as long as he is happy what odds.........life is short to be lonely.
This seems less distasteful than some of the stories I have heard. She is of a broadly comparable age, they dated for a year, why could it not be a love equal to anything with a English woman?
I always think these type of relationships fall broadly (not exclusively) into 3 categories
1 - he is a bit pervy / mad/ mean fiscally and no woman over here would be bothered with his oul shite and the poor wife becomes like a slave
2- he is a bit vulnerable and she looking for a way out and he provides it and gets his heart broken along the way
3- they meet and a genuine mutual love and respect develops much like successful arranged marriages (where there is no coercion)
I know an English guy married for the 3rd time to a Filipino woman much younger and he brought her 4 kids and his 3 to Ireland to live so they could go on the dole as it is much better here.................that is just scummy IMHO, poor woman........... he makes my skin crawl and my blood boil in equal measure. He sits on his arse all day and she tends to his every whim. ggrrrrrrrrr
Besides is it not just an updating of the old match making or arranging of marriages. There have always been different ways of meeting potential mates, this is just another one.
And not all western women are very materialistic or driven by looks, that is a bit of a misnomer I think. | |
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sjxx
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Joined: 4/9/2009
Msg: 30 | |
| MALE ORDER BRIDE!!
Posted: 7/18/2009 5:06:40 AM | Tracey is your ex husband Lili's dad? If so how can you let his new partner stop him seeing his child? I would certainly have something to say about that if I were you. Believe me, little girls who dont have a relationship with their dads crave it. My daughter didnt meet her dad till she was 17 and always wanted to. Dont let this new woman come between your daughter and your ex. She sounds like a jealous control freak to me.  | |
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| MALE ORDER BRIDE!!
Posted: 7/18/2009 5:09:36 AM |
I am south african and would never date or marry south african men as quite frankly they are brutes, but that is my personal choice.
Howzit TM!! I grew up in SA, but would not rule out being with a SA guy. Most SA guys have bigger kahunas (meant in figurative term, as do not do measuring of nether regions!) than most UK guys I have met - but I would not want to get blasted for generalising.
I like a bit of brute, but, hey, each to their own x
Veels geluk met jou soek TM! x | |
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Posted: 7/18/2009 5:10:11 AM | Can I just ask, what IS a Romance Tour? Is it where you go and purchase a wife, or is it just like a regular singles night but in another country?
If it is the latter then I don't see how it is any different to a singles night in your own country, or to a PoF meet. | |
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| MALE ORDER BRIDE!!
Posted: 7/18/2009 5:14:14 AM | ^^^^^^^^^^
Could be just like a POF night - most of the people not speaking very good English. | |
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tm1971
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Joined: 5/22/2009
Msg: 34 | |
| MALE ORDER BRIDE!!
Posted: 7/18/2009 5:21:41 AM | SJ unfortunately not but he is her godfather, which is bothering me a bit as Marketa wants to have children of her own and is feeling that at the moment Lili is basically covering that need for Robert. She is a bit threatened by our relationship as we are very close. But I have reassured her time and time again that she has nothing to worry about when it comes to Robert and me.
I have met Eastern European girls from both sides of the coin, the golddiggers and boy are they ruthless and the nice ones, I have no grudges against the girl, she is lovely and the times that Lili has spent weekends with her and Robert she has been fabulous with her, she absolutey dotes on her but she wants a family of her own and feels threatened and worried that Robert would want to come back. I can not blame her for that but my only concern is that if something happens to me, Robert is Lili's guardian.
CAZ baie dankie, hoop dit gaan goed met jou visvang ook! I just, I don't know SA men are brutes, there are some really gorgeous SA men I have to agree but they are just set apart from the rest very similar to AUS men. | |
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Posted: 7/18/2009 5:28:37 AM | Theres a lot of forums out on the 'net about this very subject. From men who have found and failed. Others (much less of these) who have found and succeeded.
Theres a zillion female Slavics out here all with different backgrounds and personalities, so heres my take of the whole game from these states. The city women generally are aspirational, strong willed, feisty, money minded (yours in mind too), hard working but if needs must, if they 'have to' find a way to bring in some extra cash. They do. So be warned.
On the other hand. There are those who are not precocious and are very much like our OP's friends wife. These have the values of the girls of 40's and 50's Britain. Here we have a guy who wanted a good old fashioned wife with a good old fashioned marriage. I applaud him fully and respect his choices in life.
The EU is doing Hitlers job in regaining his patch. So in the future we will see Turkey and the Ukraine joining up. This will make things easier to find a wifey until Ukraine has sensible men and becomes richer.
Myself, I'd leave tomorrow if I got caught up with a Slovenian lady who lives in Tolmin and paraglides  | |
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Posted: 7/18/2009 6:07:26 AM | 30 years ago a freind of the family,got himself a tai bride............and they are still together.....she has always worked,(so has he).................she was a beautiful,example of tai brides all them years ago.......jasmine in her hair.......and a smile that could out shine any english woman..............so it can happen................
come on.own up who wants a ting tong............................of even a pete tong
love you long time xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx | |
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Posted: 7/18/2009 7:20:56 AM | My father's been in a relationship with a Russian woman for about 5 years...he didn't meet her over the internet tho, she's been living in this country for some time and was working a professional job up until a couple of years ago which she left due to illness. One of the things that he really likes about her is that she's really easy going and laid back - his last girlfriend before her was a right bunny boiler, so i think it was a huge relief for him to meet someone normal  | |
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Posted: 7/18/2009 4:23:13 PM | Can I just ask, what IS a Romance Tour? Is it where you go and purchase a wife, or is it just like a regular singles night but in another country?
Right I found out how this works - you choose several women from a Database who have registered to meet a western man (you must fall into their requirements) you provide your details and pics etc to the agency.
An agency contacts the women with your details and if they agree to meet you, you book a holiday and spend one day with each of the women (she will show you around her city or whatever). From this point you get their personal detail and the rest is up to you as the agency side is complete. I suppose you keep in contact with the one you get on with best
don't know how much it costs and it appears to more of an introduction agency rather than a mail order bride so I got that wrong.
I can imagine there are many rip-off agencies about as this appears open for abuse | |
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Posted: 9/7/2009 11:56:27 AM | Corrnucopia ,could you have been talking to the guys at Newcastles pof night out ? | |
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Posted: 9/7/2009 2:08:50 PM | | I agree with Really Blue Eyes.. I know a few Thai mail order brides that have worked hard to keep their marriage harmonious and take care of their man, while remaining graceful and fragrant into their middle age. I also know a few decent younger girls who have married an older man in order to be a cash cow for their families. They are very courageous in a strange way - this is not a love match, but can become one of mutual respect. However, if a guy marries a bar girl he will eventually be crying into his beer. (You can take the girl out of the bar, but you can't take the bar out of the girl) | |
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Posted: 9/8/2009 2:57:08 AM | don't really see what the big deal is .... it's just another way of finding a partner.
does it matter whether you meet someone at the local pub, on an internet dating dating site or a romance tour ...... what's the difference ... | |
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Posted: 9/8/2009 3:59:12 AM |
does it matter whether you meet someone at the local pub, on an internet dating dating site or a romance tour ...... what's the difference ...
The difference is that in most cases someone you meet on a "romance tour" or whatever you want to call it will be interested in a ticket to a more comfortable life. If you're happy with that, fine and I'm sure there have been successful relationships of this type, but you are naiive if you don't recognise the major motivation for women from places like Ukraine. | |
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| MALE ORDER BRIDE!!
Posted: 9/8/2009 5:15:09 AM | My ex husband is marrying a polish girl this year and she is lovely. But it has come to the point where she would prefer him not to have anymore contact with me or my daughter, I have no qualms about that. But I will never have a bad word to say about her she is lovely.
let me get this straight, your ex husbands new girlfriend has stopped your child from seeing his dad and you think she is "lovely" and have no qualms?! What about the child!? | |
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| MALE ORDER BRIDE!!
Posted: 9/8/2009 9:02:28 AM | Read msg 34 ^^,the child isnt his.He is her godparent
OT
No i wouldnt.Reason being i'd rather meet someone i can spend time with from day one | |
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Posted: 9/8/2009 3:40:48 PM | Ok, granted that the vast majority MAY indeed be very materialistic, however as always, there is ALWAYS an exception to the prior,
I have recently moved to Lincolnshire, before hand I was living in Folkestone, and I worked at a place called SBE in Ashford.
Out of some 1000 maybe more, on shift at once, I was included in the 3% English statistic of workers, the vast majority were Eastern Europeans, an I did encounter a Slovakian woman who was only materialistic in the form of collecting "paper notes" as they were very precious to her, sounds crazy, but she was very in-tune with what she wanted from life and what she didn't require.
She wanted the prior for keeps memory wise.
If anything, she was all give, so there are "diamonds" to be found out there.
They just might be very hard to find...
And equally, there aren't that many people up here like that, many seem hard faced, afraid to demonstrate how they feel, etc.
But either way, that's my opinion.
Regards,
Cal | |
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| MALE ORDER BRIDE!!
Posted: 9/8/2009 4:19:12 PM | I see this not the same, but as similar to arranged marriages...
You don't REALLY get that much time to get to know one another first
The other person isn't someone you've chosen, or fell in love with. ( I say you haven't chosen them because the pool is limited, and certainly in the case of a romance tour I imagine your time would be too).
What you do have in common (hopefully, providing it goes as intended) is a wish to find someone you think you can rub along with, and then MAKE the rest happen.
I would say someone going in to this would probably be more likely to be willing to stick around through the rough times, as they're more likely to expect them, than a lot of people who are shocked when the novelty shine wears off falling in love.
However, it does leave you wide open to someone who wants to abuse the process.
I also think I'm just too picky anyway! Maybe I lack the right level of commitment if you look at it that way.
Personally, for me it would feel like settling. If I have to settle, then it will be for single life. I like a much greater role in choosing my own destiny than to think I'm going to make a commitment to someone I didn't know well. Plus the chemistry thing, perhaps even the romance thing is too important to me. | |
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Posted: 9/9/2009 1:24:43 AM | I have read about the "how Rich are you" thing with Ukrainian brides - not very subtle are they heheh
BTW she's now pregnant and they could not be happier. I wonder if this is just an isolated case or they just chose well | |
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Posted: 9/9/2009 2:36:28 AM | | Soupaman, I don't think anyone is saying anything about Eastern Europeans in general, just that those who advertise themselves to Western men on "romance tours" (or whatever you call them) are likely to be only after the money! | |
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Posted: 10/11/2009 2:55:56 PM | | Sorry Andy, I didn't mean to sound 1 sided on my behalf , yes, I fully agree that the majority may only be after one specific thing, as I have often read horror stories regarding the subject. | |
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| MALE ORDER BRIDE!!
Posted: 10/11/2009 4:42:49 PM | | I wouldn't buy a bride, but I would date someone less fortunate financially. I agree to a certain extent that us British are materialistic, we have the media and TV to blame for that, we are obsessed by other peoples wealth and looks, hence why it would take EVERY single one of the 61 million of us in this country to pay £100,000 each to clear this financial mess. So I guess a less materialistic foreign girl who didn't take things for granted would appeal too me, but I wouldn't buy her! | |
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