Don't mind futureshock...she is trying to make you feel like a piece of shyt for having a child out of wedlock and possibly using her tax dollars to pay for you and your child.

On Topic - having my children out of wedlock was the best thing I ever did to date with my life. Becoming a mother, responsible for a child, forced me to grow up and refocus on improving my life so I could be the best parent I could for my son (and now daughter). It is at times lonely and you will feel rather unappreciated and even like a leper (if you stay on POF too long in these forums) but you know what.....it is a beautiful and wonderful experience being a parent. Read all you can about parenting and caring for children because they do not come with manuals.

Like you, I share my opinions. Some people take offense to my opinion, well isn't that the argument you make frequently? Don't ask if you don't want an honest response? Just because you don't like what someone says, doesn't mean they are wrong....etc...?

Hmmm...you mean I am human too? Yeah, I admit I get annoyed and pissed sometimes with the way some people cling to their stereotypes and don't even want to see comments that do not support their stereotypes and I react negatively. I also get upset when I hear of children being physically hurt by their parent (s). I'm an advocate for the rights of children and that will not change ever.

I am as entitled to my opinion as you are. Contrary to what YOU and others may think, I don't need to validate my opinions to you or anyone else. They are mine and if I choose to alter my opinion, I will do it, not because YOU want me to but because I see value in the arguments or I experience in my own life something that makes me rethink my position on something.

Was this supposed to hurt my feelings? I am just checking because I wouldn't want to jump to any assumptions....lol. Bosox, you are very entitled to think I have no integrity if you wish to. Your opinion of me matters so very little to me personally. I know I have integrity but I also know that I am human and make mistakes also.

Not that my opinion of you should matter to you, but it seems that it does since you are in a snit now.

As for the rest of what I wrote, I shared my own personal experience becoming a mother. It is not my personal mission in life to tell anyone they do not have the right to be a parent. What I try to do is advise them to be good parents by educating themselves (especially young moms) on children and parenting. Knowing and understanding the developmental stages of a child can go a long way to helping one be an effective parent. Do you honestly think that a woman weeks away from delivering a child will suddenly think "I should give this child up for adoption?". If you do, you really are delusional or overly optimistic.

Really? Is it better for me to say, "You are an idiot to be having a baby at your age and even thinking you can raise it yourself. Statistically speaking your child is likely to grow up messed up because most single parents don't do a good job at raising their children. If you have this child and try to be its mother, you will live to regret your decision? I don't want to have to pay for your choices so if you can't afford to care for your child without my tax dollars, you should be giving it to a loving family who can provide for the child better than you can."

When a poster has become the topic, instead an idea, choice, or way of life, then it has gone too far.

I don't understand at all why so many posters here would take opinions of ideas or anything that circles them as an attack on themselves.

You are probably bringing down on me everything you feel toward a multitude of people who you feel have attacked you, and it's so sad to watch.

Now, I've obviously struck a nerve in you with what I said. If I hurt your feelings, I apologize. I don't know any more about your life than anyone did of the life of that young mother who was out to prove the world wrong...and people jumped all over her. Since you seemed not to "get it", I thought maybe it might be useful for you to get a taste of how it feels to have someone dissect your life based on a few comments they've read of what you've written. That is the point the OP is trying to make and one which you stated quite eloquently.

When someone posts a comment about their age and status as a single mom, you don't see how they get upset when the comments starts about how young women shouldn't be having babies? Really? That is one example but one that should hit rather close to home for you because you were young when you had your child.

With respect to soldier, I have not read everything he has written. What I have read were his personal feelings about his not wanting to date a single mom. He didn't go on to say that single mothers were scum or perhaps I missed those posts. His poptarts analogies illustrate quite well how silly some single parents sound when they talk of their children....the ones who don't accept that being a single parent does make it harder to date them.

Honestly, I have been in dead-end relationships as have many other men/women. Not to say that you are in one but if you were, most of us have been and understand how difficult it can be to drop out of it and move towards something that might just be healthier for us. It makes us human, not spineless.

Honestly, I have been under attack a handful of times in over 5 years on these forums so no, I have no ax to grind on anyone. Poor assumption on your part. What I have seen in the past 5 years is a multitude of people, especially single mothers being attacked for no reason other than the label of single mother. What I have also seen is fathers being put down, their value to their children being minimized by women. What I have also seen is parents openly admitting to being physically abusive towards their children. I have seen a lot of people in denial too. Fortunately, with the exception of the last 3 months or so, this forum topic has been more positive than negative and I've learned a lot from other parents and shared a great deal of my own personal experiences with others. This forum used to be a source of support for single parents. It is now filled with a tonne of negativity and that is truly sad.

But that's only if/when I get to tame bosox. Until then, my life will be a sad and empty thing I need to write bad poetry about.

It is alllll about the 8sf8.

I have read more than a handful of articles of women making up a babysitter in the past year or so and leaving their infants, toddlers and children at home alone. My mom did the same thing. The explanations these women give about how the kids were safe and it was better they go out of their own sanity than dealing with parenting is really scary.
Not everyone is getting caught doing this, as you can tell from how long these young women got away with it.

Don't remotely agree with that, yes it seems more irritating when a person without kids is on here being a douche but that is because they are an asshat not because they have had no children. And the no box in the children category doesn't also necessarily mean that the person has no parenting experience because they may be a step-parent, may even still have relationships with the step-children but may not have felt that marking yes in that box was honest because he/she has no biological children. And color me stupid, even if you haven't raised a child, you have been a child and have had a relationship with your parents or whoever else raised you. Bing comes to mind as someone that is young, has no children, and often adds valuable insight to this forum.

It is a free site and a free country, unless you live in Yemen, so if you don't like what someone says you have the choice to respond and rip them a new one or ignore the bullshit comments for what they are.

Did you ever stop to think that Caylee's Mom killed her daughter because she was one of those moms who ventured into this forum and was told being a mother would negate her chances at love, was attacked for even thinking she could find love in the first place since she essentially ruined her life by becoming a single mother? Most of the stories you hear about women killing their children (aside from Post-partum issues) involve some guy she loved who wanted nothing to do with her children. That is what is sad also...that these women are so tied up in their need for love/a man that they cannot see the value of their children. There are many more stories of single parents too involved in their addictions to provide for their children but mostly social services or the penal system ends up dealing with those children - they rarely make the headlines except when they get in trouble with the law.

Blaming someone like me for a mother killing their own child is really low, itsallinthesoul.

Did you ever stop to think that Caylee's Mom killed her daughter because she was one of those moms who ventured into this forum and was told being a mother would negate her chances at love, was attacked for even thinking she could find love in the first place since she essentially ruined her life by becoming a single mother?