| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 7:36:43 PM | Hello Liveletlive,
I noticed something pretty strange in my time on these forums, mainly men calling women gold diggers for demanding that a man have a job and/or a car. Since when did looking for something other than street bums start to mean that these women are gold diggers.
Being a man myself, I am embarrassed by all those on these forums that refer to these women as gold diggers. Get off the couch, get on the bus, and go get yourself a JOB! It doesn't make her a gold digger, it just makes you a moron for calling her that.
I think some of us need to meet some real gold diggers because we have lost touch
No, no, no buddy,
I am not a bum, I own my own house. By "own" I don't mean the bank says it's mine. I mean I hold the double-damned deed in my hand. Sure it's in Mexico next to the beach but owning a home at 26 anywhere in the world is definitely not a bum. Even if I loose my job I will never worry about a roof over my head.
Secondly I don't have and never will have credit. So by me having just one penny in my pocket make me richer than 89% of the population in America who is in dept.
If you look up bum in the dictionary you will not find what I have posted above as the description.
So I don't have a car. And I just so happen to believe that a girl who has a job, who has money, who has a car and says she is over the top trilled about me and asks me "Are you to good to be true?" but stops talking to me the second I apparently convince her that I am by informing her that currently I do not have a car a gold digger. Well maybe not a gold digger but definitely a person who puts money before compatibility.
I can totally understand a girl not wanting to shack up with some car-less guy at first glance but to just drop some guy she likes over it is not really all that honest now is it.
There is more to people than what they drive. And not owning a car has nothing to do with being a bum.
I'm sure you will change your mind once this economy gets a little worse and your credit is cut.
TA!!
Izzy. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 7:37:37 PM | A woman wanting a man to have a car and a job does not equal gold digger
but if she insist he have a 2010 Mercedes E Class and a 7 figure income on the other hand.....she might be a gold digger. I'm just sayin'  | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 7:44:26 PM | I've never actually heard that at all by guys. I think that's the impression you get when guys are too hasty on calling girls gold-diggers. Yes, they can be hasty, but no, I've never seen it to that degree at ALL on here.
Hasty = Women are gold-diggers when they want a guy who makes over $50k/yr, a decent car, and has zero debt.
Those aren't gold-diggers. However, guys sour about that will call them out as such. But heck... a poor college student can have a summer job and a car. If you haven't had a job for a while, you're not ready to date. Focus on finding a job, not a date (unless you have a lot of money saved up or inherited). If you live in a non-metropolis (99% of places in the country) where a car is a standard necessity, and don't have one, that cries financial instability. If you can't drive, that's a dating handicap. That's not gold-digging.
With that aside, I will say this...
A woman wanting a guy with a Lexus or better car, living in a $250k+ house at least, some expensive toys, making over $100k/yr, she may NOT technically be a gold-digger.
She may be a status-digger. It may not be that's trying to suck MONEY out of you -- she's "going out with you because you're popular". So when some women defend gold-digging on this level, they could have a point that it isn't about the MONEY directly.
It's also not about financial stability -- they want more than that. They want the status. Status-diggers, some are. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 7:57:10 PM | YEAH!! There's a man out there who gets the fact that I don't want his money, I just want to make sure his butt isn't on the couch doing nothing except waiting to spend mine! I've know a few golddiggers in my time (of both sexes, thank you) and the reality is, they are easy to spot and even easier to avoid.
I'm a woman and I don't care what my "other half" does as long as he's happy and contributes to the household. (If he doesn't have a 'straight job' and wants to do the cooking, cleaning, yardwork, staying home with the kids then MORE POWER TO HIM!!!!) The less of that domestic crap I have to deal with the better.
I do agree with lifeletlive 09, too many people assume women are golddiggers when in reality we just want somebody who isn't a total bum. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 7:57:33 PM | I am all about the status! That's right, I love guys with trucks and motorcycles!Something fun about having to get a boost to get inside of a nice size pick-up truck. LOL Well, I do like trucks and motorcycles.  | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 8:10:47 PM | Most of you have great arguments. The only thing I have overlooked is that some people live in large cities where an automobile is not necessary. Nonetheless, even I still need my car for "entertainment purposes" even though I live in an urban center. It really is up to both people involved if they can make it work with public transit.
In regards to jobs, I stated in my second post that I wasn't referring to people who are in between jobs. Most of us have quit a job or two, been laid off from one or two, and have spent a small period of time in between jobs once or twice. The point is that if you do not have a job you better be spending 8-12 hours a day looking for one. No excuses, no complaints, what women want to see is that you have a long steady employment history and that this is only a blip in your life. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 8:42:00 PM | Hello Liveletlive,
No excuses, no complaints, what women want to see is that you have a long steady employment history and that this is only a blip in your life.
Yea well I want to see women cook, clean if they expect me to have an 18 a day 50,000 dollar a year job.
WTF?
I'm expected to be that old time hard working man but a girl gets to be this new aged "I'm 100% independent" Female version of Richard Simmons? Foock that.
Hell I'm actually learning to cook from my mother just in case I do meet some girl and start a family the kids won't have to eat fast food every day.
Women need to realise that things go both ways in a relationship. I don't care where to people start off financially if they love each other and work hard together they will have anything they want in life.
And they better hope that good man has a car because if he does not they will just pass his bum asss by.
TA!!
Izzy. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 9:58:58 PM |
A woman wanting a man to have a car and a job does not equal gold digger
You still haven't said why any of that should matter if she is getting her dates paid for and she isn't playing taxi. If it doesn't affect her, it's none of her business. As soon as she wants to know about things that don't affect her, her motives are questionable. Since I have paid 100% of the cost of the dates I've had since coming here, even asking me those questions is being too nosy.
but if she insist he have a 2010 Mercedes E Class and a 7 figure income on the other hand.....she might be a gold digger. I'm just sayin'
Oh, now I get it. A woman is only a goldigger if she expects more than you currently have in the way of a car and a job? | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 10:12:39 PM | | To Pashune ... It may be almost impossible to get the job you WANT (or the ideal job) but it's not all that hard to find SOME kind of job. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 10:14:43 PM | | well the econemy has got worsen and people are losing jobs and jobs are getting hard today as people are losing homes or either on the streets and woman want this from like having to live in a mansion or ferrai or dogge viper if thats the way they are they are not worth the time and day most people move backhome to look for work or have fallen hard times as umployment is on the rise and the worse of its going worse at least for the next few years | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 11:30:48 PM | and seriously whats it to people if women ARE gold diggers? if you don't wanna be with one, just move the hell on. everyone has different views. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 11:42:03 PM | Hello Alex1988,
and seriously whats it to people if women ARE gold diggers? if you don't wanna be with one, just move the hell on. everyone has different views.
There is nothing wrong with being a gold digger hon. As long as, like you, they let a bum know about it.
That way usless homless people like me with no car don't waist their time.
So I guess I should say I have a problem with hypocritical wenches who claim not to be Gold Diggers when they really are.
TA!!
Izzy. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/23/2009 11:55:05 PM | YUP! He must have a car and a job.
I have dated men who had neither and almost always it was because they were bums.
I understand that big city theory but most places...I don't want to have to go pick up my date, pay for the date and then return him home knowing that is how it would be every time we went out.
My g/f only dates what I call..."no loads". They don't have jobs and suck every ounce they can from her. They don't have cars because they can't per the law.
Yea..it is her own fault. I can guarantee you that if I ever came across one of them I would turn tail and run. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/24/2009 12:05:02 AM |
To Pashune ... It may be almost impossible to get the job you WANT (or the ideal job) but it's not all that hard to find SOME kind of job.
Alright, that's sorta true, but I'm growing weary of jobs that might last one or two weeks at max. I'm not picky on jobs at all. I'll work at McDonald's flipping burgers if I had to.. if they'd just effing hire me! It's probably unnecessary to discuss this, but my parents are really encouraging too. (sarcasm) They've been unemployed for nearly a month now for whatever reason I can't keep up with. Not even my girlfriend can find another job where she lives and she's able to apply at many other places than I am due to her location. She's employed, yes, but usually working 2 days per week because of too many people working there/her manager being biased isn't so great. But the good news is that she was need for 4 days this week. Hopefully it'll stay like that and improve. I'm really happy for her.
I wish my neighbor still had computers for me to repair. Damn, it was great making $50 for a 20 minute job.  | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/24/2009 12:09:02 AM | Hello Forumnite,
I understand that big city theory but most places...I don't want to have to go pick up my date, pay for the date and then return him home knowing that is how it would be every time we went out.
Why not?
I don't have a problem with it. Most men have been doing it for ages and ages since the first car was ever invented.
And before that, you might have heard the saying "you chariot awaits my lady".
I can understand men being the bearer of such deeds as long as there is a nice home made dinner in it for him once in a while. But this double-damned standard bull crap where Women get to act like drunken sailors yet "actual guys are still expected to be knights in shinning armor is stupid.
TA!!
Izzy. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/24/2009 12:47:35 AM | | I have met my share of gold diggers. I am rather well off and can afford all the toys but in general don't like to flaunt and have always believed keeping a low profile. Funny enough I own a honda and one of my assistants has a lexus. We went out and it was hilarious how many women flocked to him and thought he was my boss. We got a kick out of it. Anyway, nothing wrong with a woman looking to invest in a rich counterpart. Her payment is her looks and talents and she should be ready for the wealthy gent to dispose of her once her end of the investment begins to carry less value. If you want to approach it as a transaction, disclose all and treat it as a giving of value for value. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/24/2009 12:54:02 AM | Whats with not having a job? I mean even in these tough times, there ARE jobs available, they just might not be your high flying high paying type. I see NO excuse for being out of work, especially extensively (I know one person no job no car no place of his own for over 2 yrs, WTF?) when Whataburger and Wendy's always need people. So maybe its not the job you dreamed of, but its still work experience and a paycheck. Go get one for god's sake. Go to the burger joint on the corner by your house and fill out an application. Tell the mgr you can work whenever and start tomorrow if they want. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/24/2009 2:22:38 AM | Yep I had this too....and i am quite the opposite of gold digger !!
I was chatting to a member...and tried to be 'Interested' in his interests....so asked If he worked offshore ( as he had hinted ) and asked about his interests in extreme sports.
Well I got this HUGE reply...ranting on about I should go find myself someone who can supply me with the Luxurious lifestyle I was after, WITHOUT having the inconvenince of an offshore worker ! And the reply went on....and on. I was quite mystified to this. So just sent a polite reply stating I was only asking a question....and that I worked for a living too, and maybe he should 'Lighten up a bit'
Strange ? | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/24/2009 3:57:50 AM | I remember the tread where some guy was calling a woman a gold digger for expecting him to pay for coffee.
Since I don't live in Chicago, NYC, or even DC - I would want to know why he doesn't have a car. There are an increasing number of people who are giving up their cars in favor of bicycles or mopeds because not having a car is a way to save money in a bad economy. But, there's also a stunning number of people around here who are on bikes/mopeds because of DUI convictions. I would really want to know which it was.
I would accept "student" as a job, but if he's not a student - in my age range he'd better have a job. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/24/2009 4:28:20 AM | Yeah, we just don't wanna be someones caddy nor do we want to be their sugar momma.
Sheesh sorry for askin you guys to be self sufficient. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/24/2009 5:05:58 AM | Real gold diggers don't really do the online thing.
Men with 7 figures in their bank account don't really do online dating. It's not necessary.
So it stands to reason that the women who prey on them would not be on here either. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/24/2009 6:05:03 AM | ^^^8soldierfalcon8, an educated and realistic comment. Refreshing. I totally agree with you, neither of those categories in reality would be hanging out on POF.
Why not?
I don't have a problem with it. Most men have been doing it for ages and ages since the first car was ever invented.
LMAO of course you don't have a problem with it. I don't care what men have been doing for centuries. In my lifetime, I've always driven myself places and paid for my own stuff unless I was in a long term thing where we both. So if I can do it, they can do it. Period. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/24/2009 7:13:00 AM | I know I would not be interested in a woman that was not financially stable and had a job, so why would I assume women would be interested in a guy who was unemployed and did not have transportation? The car might be negotiable if I lived in NYC, but almost every where else you need a car. Unless it was a recent lay off, then the job raises all kinds of warning flags.
But I have met my share of women who are looking for a human ATM. Just press a few buttons and it spits out money, or they want a guy who drives a really nice car, has a really nice house, expensive lifestyle, etc. Just not for me at all. | |
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| Must have car and job=gold digger?
Posted: 7/24/2009 9:00:34 AM | The guys that call women gold diggers are the one that don't have any gold to dig for. They are soooo worried someone is going to steal their pin number and bankroll them for the $50 in their checking account. These are the same guys ****ing about a cup of coffee and why he didn't get a bj for his pleasant company. Of course, if the guy is a douche, the reason the woman doesn't want to have a second meeting must be his lack of finances. It's not him being a jerk or she's just not into you for a myriad of reasons besides money, right?
Anyway...If you don't have a job, why are you dating? I suppose it's for the sex, but you still need condoms and they cost money. And where are you having this sex if you don't have a job. If you don't have a job, you ain't paying for a motel. Are you in your parents basement, your friends couch? In the car that's about to be repo'd? No wonder there's a recession...people more worried about getting off than getting employed! | |
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