| How do YOU know when it's over?
Posted: 7/30/2009 9:27:31 AM | I think changing the relationship to landlord/tenant is the best option. But you hopefully have learned something from this, relationships when you are in your early 20's are best kept casual. Sharing property can gets very ugly if the relationship cools down.
Hopefully you can be friends but I would be prepared to move if he changes his mind. If he is the Mama's boy you say he is don't be surprised if she decides you need to go. | |
|
| How do YOU know when it's over?
Posted: 7/30/2009 9:32:13 AM | | You do not like your SO maybe that is why you are mad at him all time? You don't like anyting about your life but you don't want to change it either because then you will be lonely. If I was in your situation (and I have gotten to the point where I was irritated by all the little things) I would pack up my stuff and move out because the day I treat a man like you are treating yours, I would be ashamed. | |
|
| How do YOU know when it's over?
Posted: 7/30/2009 9:41:45 AM | First, if you're capable of walking all over a guy and even BEGINNING to settle in with him, you've got problems. Also, after time passes, he's being an a$$hole -- he has every right to be. It's not supposed to be the manly-trucker-i-do-what-truckers-do-a$$hole type, it's being pissed off, of course.
Not that I have much sympathy for him, but hey, he's entitled to be that way. His persona is far from attractive to most women, fine, but that in no way gives you clearance on being a b!tch and mooching off him.
Women should not be like kids and trained. You can't say, "I'll walk all over you and treat you like a b!tch if you let me." Then you're a child. Does a guy have to potty train you too? It'd be like saying, "I'll sh!t on your floor if you let me!" Come on.
Real women, when they see a wuss, they don't become attracted, and they walk away before anything really formulates. They just don't want to deal with it. Hell, many women err on the side of sensing whether a guy may be a little like that, and walk away within the first few minutes. Mooching-women, when they see a wuss or potential wuss ("Mr Nice Guy"), if the timing's right, they may see an opportunity if he's physically decent.
I hope he kicks you to the curb and cuts you off from communication. :) | |
|
| How do YOU know when it's over?
Posted: 7/30/2009 9:42:17 AM | Somehow I think you have as many issues about yourself and your decision making, as you do about your current relationship.
You need some serious counseling, and need to grow some balls and live life on your own. Why is it that you want your man to do what you should for yourself? Why would you expect him to act a certain way, when you do not act a certain way either?
Seems to me that you saw an opportunity that was financially beneficial to you, and he became your mortgage company because he could afford it and you could not, and now you want to change the conditions of the agreement, and the interest you must pay in order to stay where you are.
For people like you, we have certain words that we use, and I will not insult everyone here by using them, but maybe, just maybe, you and those men that you have relationships with, should carry a briefcase with them containing a prenuptial....... or at least template contracts to protect themselves from you......
You are mad at him because you are not mature enough to be mad at yourself, and you are denying the real reasons why you are where you are, and what that makes you.
Just my opinion........   | |
|
| How do YOU know when it's over?
Posted: 7/30/2009 9:58:18 AM | | Well jus' goes to show ya that women do not want nice guys......I have made the same mistake in the past....So w/that bein' said darlin'.....GET OUT .....You dont respect him & frankly at this point you don't respect yourself either...Go find someone who will treat you like a b!tch .......For get Mr. Nice Guy...... | |
|
| How do YOU know when it's over?
Posted: 7/30/2009 9:58:29 AM | | the duck is burnt, get your stuff and dipset out the house and find a man that will man up when he needs to and put you in check when you're being a bitch. | |
|
| How do YOU know when it's over?
Posted: 7/30/2009 10:42:37 AM | This is an example of what happens when people are not a good match. Good people can still be wrong for each other. I think you are seeking validation for what you've already decided: to leave.
It sounds like you suspect you should find someone more compatible. I agree.
Seek someone next time who matches your energy and ambition levels. Otherwise, you will end up being the "mom" taking care of a man's details the rest of his life. I have some older girlfriends who have done this. It's exhausting and leaves you without any respect for your partner.
Who you align your life with in a partner has more to do with your life's happiness than any other choice. | |
|
| How do YOU know when it's over?
Posted: 7/30/2009 11:18:39 AM | wow. Im just blown away by this posting.
Have you had your hormones checked? I say that for 2 reasons. A girl I work with has been married for 20 yrs and recently started ranting at work and said she hated her husband and the kids and that life sucks. We were shocked... turned out her hormones were off ALOT. She's doing better now that her estrogen/testosterone levels are normal for a female.
Second, I was having some "hate everything everyone" issue when I found out my thyroid was messed up. Now?..Life is great and I feel terrific and I love everybody.
It doesnt sound to me like its Him or the place or bills..etc. It sounds like you are miserable inside and just ranting because that's all you can do when youre off balance hormonally.
..my 2 cents. | |
|
| How do YOU know when it's over?
Posted: 7/30/2009 8:27:01 PM | I cry as I write this to you. I come from a relationship mutch the same as what you are going through. I loved this girl with all my heart but something went wrong. I made a lot of mistakes but I never stopped being in love with her. I tried to make things right but every time I failed in some way. What you wrote crushed my soul because the man you describe sounds like me and the girl sounds like you. She would talk down to me something bad and I took it on the chin. You need to know that because someone doesn't just stand up and tell you to stop treating them poorly it doesn't mean they have no balls. It means that maybe they are hoping that a miracle will happen and that the fire, that love you felt at one time still lives. My love story is over. Unfortunate but true. Yours sounds like it's been over. Just give the guy one last show of love and set him free. He may seem like he is weak but you don't know the strength that it takes to love someone when you know in your heart they no longer love you and they talk down to you. Put yourself in his shoes and do what's right. If you ever cared for him give him that. Let him go.
Tomy | |
|
| How do YOU know when it's over?
Posted: 7/30/2009 10:38:40 PM | hmmm .... my assessment is....
move on
don't shack up so quick, you are young, get your own life going, you need to find another place, get the hard part over and break up.
Thank you, drive thru... | |
|
Home
login 
