| Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 7/6/2005 10:27:37 AM | Nothing wrong with being on your own......gives you space to find out who you are.
And once you know yourself better, this question would be moot...as you would know inside if the person would be right and whether it will work. And if not, you would avoid getting involved with them. To get involved with someone you know is wrong leads to problems....someone will get hurt...and 9 times out of 10, the "right" one shows up at 10 minutes past the beginning of the wrong relationship.
Hang with yourself and some good books. A beautiful sunrise. A couple of movies you haven't seen. Whatever...just don't get involved with the wrong one cuz the right one ain't there yet. Wait it out.
Squeak | |
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sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 29 | |
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sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 30 | |
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| Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 7/6/2005 10:43:53 AM | Sorry sddude,I knew I was gona put my foot in my mouth and I feel so
awfull for saying that!
I understand what you mean,but I sure rather be alone,can't handle a relationship
right now!Once again sddude,I'm sorry if I overstepped my bounderies!
Knight Rider! | |
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poor
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Joined: 6/6/2005
Msg: 32 | |
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sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 35 | |
| Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 7/6/2005 11:08:32 AM | That is okay knight rider , it has been two years , a little far now .
What I seem to hear here , is that most people have had very bad experiences with relationships that were on going and prefer to be alone , fighting and stress , evil deeds abounded and added to unhappiness and disatisfaction ,
sorry , I cannot relate to any kind of tumultuous relationship , my pearents never had any fights or problems that I have known.
sorry for not understanding your delimas , maybe I am a virgin at fighting or serious anger .
Maybe I am too much of an "angel" to understand how you guys feel . I have been treated badly by women , ALOT but not in a relationship setting , when I was treated badly I never ever mean or angry just , respectful and feel hurt inside .
I would rather be with someone because I KNOW how to make things work , maybe I am an odd or weird . I am kind of the type of guy that can make a happy marriage out of an arrnged marriage with alien from another planet , hahaha | |
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| Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 7/6/2005 11:12:14 AM | So you are saying you can learn to love and be attracted to someone you otherwise wouldn't be?
I can't do that, and would much rather be alone than have to sleep beside someone I felt was sexually incompatible and/or I felt was a complete louse.
I'm definitely not knocking your perspective, SD, far from it. But I've tried to get that 'feeling' back for someone when they've really turned me off (attitude or physically) and I just couldn't - not even for the life of me. | |
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sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 37 | |
| Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 7/6/2005 12:20:45 PM | I am not saying , getting to love garbage that has no soul . both people have to have the same outlook both people have to know how to love , know how to give , it is not about quality but about both knowing how to love , deny themselves , be for the other like the other be for you ,
I never did sports but my wife anted a well built guy that did sports even though she was overweigfht and loved to do nothing , I got into surfing and alot of stuff cuz she wanted it , it became me , I love surfin and extreme sports , I was always the guy kids teased and beat up after school cuz I was a geeky weekling , she changed me for ever , for the better , I did the same for her , I wanted her and motivated her to do things with me , participate in may car show stuff , she even painted and upolstered, I helped her with her fashion show stuff that I motivated her into cuz I love women who are flashy into fashion , there so pretty , it became her . She even let me into the models big dressing room cuz she new I liked to see pretty naked ladies apart to get me reved up for sex in an odd place in there.
It is about helping people find themselves , get better every year , every year being fabulous for yourself and the one you choose to love ,
Sexual attraction at first was quite boring , like having sex with a best friend or a sister type , we learn to give and take so much that people thought we were deprived or perverted
becuase we were so curious and creative , we even did it on the plane several times , what guy would not want a woman that does EVERYthing in the porno movies he chooses in exchange for her own fantasies ?
To have a relationship is not static and down hill like most of you seemed to have had it is having a crazy fun life , that gets interesting day by day .
Ever had a best friend that you never ever had a fight with and every moment was cool and enjoyable but you felt they were not your type for any relationship ? that is the way I felt at first ...
I think you people limit yourself and want the person to already be made for you at exactly your specifications , when a person is giving and forsakes some of their wants or the lack of they can be as maleable as you yourself want to ,
selfishness and inflexibility is a sign of immaturity in my book at least in my world , maybe that is why relationships fail , people want it al lfor them selves one or both do , they claim they do not want or need to change but they always do , why change worse and worse as times pass , worse foryourself , family and your spouse. Instead of moving foreward in a relationship , it moves backward . Must strive to be better and better everyday , without becomming a slave to it , it is like striving for sainthood but withing the relationship , if both do it is is a great thing , if one does it only , it becomes slavery for one , if no one does it it just becomes a boring or conflictive relationship. That is why most people take vacations to rekindle the relationship , because they did not go foreward , they want to forget who they are for a little while to pretend they are someone else other than a couple , a little fantasy ,
What if everyday it were like a honeymoon , something new or something funny or even stupid , never a dull moment ... I guess I am a dreammer that actually lived the dream and wants another one . I have so far have two friends that are candidates I have not told them but they are interested in me , I resist still because it is still a scary thing , that is why I ant to know more women and have some dates , the more I know the more I can have fun now and see what more is out ther , this year so far , no dates. | |
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ksue44
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Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 40 | |
| Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 7/7/2005 4:49:43 PM | Alone.
Real love can't be forced, it has to be mutual and it should give you great joy and is not something to be questioned. If you settle, there are always those nagging doubts that will haunt you. Eventually the relationship will fizzle and be no more. | |
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| Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 7/7/2005 5:19:14 PM | lol all these people wanting to be alone..... what does "not your type" mean anyways. i would date a chick even if i new it could never progress beyond a certian level. like when a chick has terrible spending habits. i would never move in with a chick who was a shopaholic or marry one. most times when people move in together their incomes sorta merge, and if my girlfriend blows her money on frivolous things when she has bills to pay, well thats none of my business, LOL shes a big girl, she can do what she wants. if my girlfriend spends OUR money on frivolous things when we have OUR bills to pay im may get a little pissed. so if i recognise this in a girl im dating i know i wont be moving in with her but i dont see any reason to break it off. if things are good let them ride, move on if things go sour.
lol "settle for someone that is not your type." of what? of girlfriend, of wife, of good friend with benifits? because someone isnt your type of wife/husband, does that mean u cant enjoy each others company while your lives travel the same road? as long as both people are upfront about their intentions, no one will get hurt. | |
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| Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 7/7/2005 6:14:34 PM | | so instead of friends first what happened to at first glance fate destiny everything is guided and happens for a reason take your gut instinct and run with it. life is boring unless you fly by the seat of your pants. if i see and like i go for it what is wrong with love at first sight. shit i am still alone. | |
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| Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 7/7/2005 6:34:06 PM | That depends on how compatible you are, even with having not much in common. I've known many couples who don't have much in common, but they're great together.....and seeing as they're technically not each other's "type", they have some good debates that provoke some thought. I think if someone is too much of your own type, it's easy to be co-dependent and have them support everything that you want them to. So it depends entirely on the person. If a woman is not my type, but challenges me to expand my intellect and way of thinking, i'm all for it. Sometimes you don't want to preach too much to the converted, 'ya know?  | |
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| Is it better to be alone Or settle for someone that is not Your type.
Posted: 7/7/2005 6:34:50 PM | | euro..it's a tough call and depends on a lot of things. But I do believe some are not fit for a mate. I happen to be one, but learned it too late. It may not make much sense, but I do love my wife,,but just wasn't a good man for her. I was alone for a long time, and should have stayed that way. But we are all different. | |
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