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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 9:02:15 AM |
Here's another interpretation: Perhaps she felt it was degrading to herself, and that was the turn-on for her; that she's "such a little slut" that her BF has to clean her out or something.
well if this is the reason ..can we agree she has issues ???
Not necessarily, at all. I know people who enjoy degrading sexual partners, or who enjoy being degraded by sexual partners. As long as it's done in a consensual way and with respect, particularly outside the bedroom, then I don't see any problem with it.
this is what I referred to as play degrading ..when everyone involved is on board ..
Agreed, though this post didn't ping on my manipulation radar. It's not clear from the post whether there was underhanded manipulation going on, so in absence of that information, I'm assuming there wasn't.
well certainly he is having issues with having done it ...so that being said ... I am imagining he showed reluctance to her fantasy
If someone's willing to help fulfill someone's fantasies, even if that does nothing for him, personally, then he's being a good partner as long as he's comfortable with what's happening.
clearly he is now not so comfortable with it ..now that it has happened ...and for that reason ..if he was not manipulated and it was simply her expressing a fantasy ..then he is either weak or in the closet JMO | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 9:25:52 AM |
well if this is the reason ..can we agree she has issues ???
Nope. People have weird kinks, and that's okay. Lots of people like playing with control and mild degradation in a sexual context. As long as it stays within a consensual sexual context, there's nothing issue-related going on, as far as I'm concerned.
clearly he is now not so comfortable with it ..now that it has happened ...and for that reason ..if he was not manipulated and it was simply her expressing a fantasy ..then he is either weak or in the closet JMO
That's a really big leap, from "thinking about it after the fact" to "weak or in the closet". Have you never done something in the moment that you thought about afterwards? I sure have. He may be simply processing an experience he hadn't expected to have, or didn't expect to be okay with, and figuring out where that fits in his life or his view of himself. That's healthy behavior.
It's completely possible that he's easily manipulated, and it's possible that he's a closet case, but I find those much less likely. I don't see any reason to default to pathologizing what is probably a very normal response to having done something he would never have seen himself doing previously. | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 9:35:11 AM | If you label it then you will have a difficult time enjoying it, because it brings association with it.
Unfortunately, isn't that what screws up sex for so many people? Instead of just simply exploring and enjoying all kinds of things and then repeating the ones that really felt good, they label certain sex acts as 'good', 'bad', 'dirty', 'forbidden', 'gay' etc. and then avoid them or associate other feelings with them that my no longer allow them to just feel.
So, the way I look at it - if you like it, enjoy it, if you don't like, then don't do it again, but don't let labels make your decisions for you. | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 9:44:52 AM |
Er, did you miss the part where the OP 1) has a girlfriend, and 2) was sucking her p*ssy? Those are rather crucial components, and he's clearly not gay. If this turned him on, he could explore whether he's bi (or simply shares the same fetish), but this doesn't make him gay. At all.
No I didn't miss that point... but using her as a receptacle to drink another guy's juice from is only part of it... Watching Gay porn on your own Japanese TV set doesn't mean you're Japanese, it means you're GAY...
There's often not an alternative when someone has a fantasy like this.
You're wrong... there's this little word, "No..."
That's all the alternative I'd need... I once had a woman I was seeing suggest a threesome with a guy we met.... that was the last conversation we ever had... it lasted all of 2 minutes.... no idea what happened to her....
Aside from which: if he was willing to fulfill his GF's fantasy, what about that doesn't indicate that he's probably a giving lover? As long as he wasn't doing something he was uncomfortable with, he should be commended. So, he posted here BECAUSE he's 'comfortable' with it? Seems to me he's a giving lover alright and willing to swallow his pride, and the other guy's too....
If not, testing would definitely be in order, and only protected sex for the next three months until tests come back clean.
First off, if someone had 'protected' sex with me and then disclosed they may have been exposed to HIV or another STD during a threesome and they didn't know their status, then having an STD would be the least of their problems...
If this was someone they knew, chances are low for infection
Your logic on this escapes me... someone you know could as easily lie as someone you don't know... Just because you 'know' them doesn't mean squat... | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 9:50:38 AM |
Lots of people like playing with control and mild degradation in a sexual context. As long as it stays within a consensual sexual context, there's nothing issue-related going on, as far as I'm concerned.
The problem with that theory is that people who want to be degraded often times have issues with 'consent'. If you beat a dog often enough it will actually come to enjoy the beatings because it craves the attention that comes with it...
People who enjoy being degraded have issues... People who degrade others have issues too.... | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 9:50:45 AM |
I recently did a threesome with a girl I have been dating and she had a fantasy of one guy getting off in her while other guy sucked juices out of her and spit it on her chest and stomach is that gay act. I think I just did it out of hotness to impress her ?
playing with another man's sperm is gay.
NEXT!!!!! | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 9:56:01 AM |
In the cuckolding world it is quite common....A gay act?...I would think only if you sucked him off.
I would consider sucking another man's fluids from a chicks vagina to be a gay act, rather it is her fantasy, or not.
Obviously OP is bothered by this act, or else he wouldn't be asking such a question.
Perhaps he think performing this act now makes him a homosexual? Perhaps he has the impression that he is a homosexual? Or perhaps bisexual? There has to be some type of motive behind him asking such a question. | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 10:06:10 AM | Have you never done something in the moment that you thought about afterwards? I sure have
nope ..nothing against my core values ...yes I have done things knowing i shouldn't do them.. but nothing that made me question my sexual orientation afterwords
I am very sexually liberal ..however I have never done anything that i couldnt see myself doing before hand ..now that may well be because there is not much that is on my taboo list
who am I to say what is normal ..what I will say is that given my association with the swinger community ...(and dont read this wrong ...im not a swinger ...I do security work at swinger clubs ).. which I would say is a fairly open liberal group ...I know that contact of any kind between males in a mfm threesome ..is not the norm... much less something to this extent
i see it all the time ...usually in the form of a guy wanting his wife to do the BI thingy ..and most times he succeeds in getting her to ...but this is wrong .. there is nothing wrong in my book with the BI thing however anyone should come to this on their own
so i still say that if you pull your partner to something if you even suspect that they are unresolved with it ...then your issues are that you are a manipulator
thank you Mchurch we are often at odds on threads but on this one we are on the same page | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 10:07:01 AM |
No I didn't miss that point... but using her as a receptacle to drink another guy's juice from is only part of it... Watching Gay porn on your own Japanese TV set doesn't mean you're Japanese, it means you're GAY...
That's a poor analogy--how else are you going to watch porn but on your TV/computer? On the other hand, if it's the cum he was after, he could have given the other guy a blow job, which is not what happened. How many gay guy do you know who would choose to use a p*ssy as a cum receptacle versus just giving a guy head?!
There's often not an alternative when someone has a fantasy like this. You're wrong... there's this little word, "No..." That's all the alternative I'd need... I once had a woman I was seeing suggest a threesome with a guy we met.... that was the last conversation we ever had... it lasted all of 2 minutes.... no idea what happened to her....
That's not an "alternative", that's a flat-out refusal. There's nothing wrong with saying no to something you don't want, though the way you apparently discarded someone who asked for what she wanted, and the way you're responding to the OP, suggest that you have a tendency to pathologize any sort of kinky or non-standard sexual desires.
So, he posted here BECAUSE he's 'comfortable' with it? Seems to me he's a giving lover alright and willing to swallow his pride, and the other guy's too....
He may be simply trying to process it after the fact if his own behavior surprised him. That's a normal human activity, after-the-fact processing. I'm not sure why you're so insistent on making his willingness to please his lover something bad or shameful to be looked down upon. Nobody's suggested that you do this, right?
First off, if someone had 'protected' sex with me and then disclosed they may have been exposed to HIV or another STD during a threesome and they didn't know their status, then having an STD would be the least of their problems...
First off, all sex is a risk. I'd hope that everyone would have STD risk conversations prior to engaging in sexual activity. "I had an unprotected threesome so there's a risk I've been exposed to something" would cover this situation adequately, no?
Additionally, I was assuming, quite possibly incorrectly, that the OP and his GF would be having sex with each other for the next few months. Protection would keep any infection one might have contracted to that one of them; on the other hand, they get to decide what risks they're willing to take with their own bodies.
If this was someone they knew, chances are low for infection
Your logic on this escapes me... someone you know could as easily lie as someone you don't know... Just because you 'know' them doesn't mean squat...
I'm assuming a trustworthy friend. Knowing someone and their behavior does cut down on risk. Trust is sometimes misplaced; again, this is always a risk. But knowing someone and their history means you have a better idea what you're getting into. It's hardly a foolproof thing, but then, when is it ever? Tons of people have partners they trust who cheat on them. You have to decide whether you're going to live in fear, of take the proper precautions as you feel they're warranted, and go from there.
I have no idea how well the OP and his GF vetted the third in their threesome. Some people are thorough and well aware of risks, others are not. I know polyamorous couples who require STD test results on paper before engaging even in protected play with people they already know, and I know people who'll have unprotected sex with no prior conversation about STD status on the first date. People handle these things differently. To me, the second would be unnecessarily risky to the point of stupid, but as to the OP's situation, we have no idea because he hasn't said anything about that. It's all conjecture. | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 10:16:07 AM |
He may be simply trying to process it after the fact if his own behavior surprised him. That's a normal human activity
I am unfamiliar with the concept of my behavior surprising me ....thats called maturity ..other peoples behavior often shocks the hell out of me | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 10:18:34 AM |
ge:
Have you never done something in the moment that you thought about afterwards? I sure have nope ..nothing against my core values ...yes I have done things knowing i shouldn't do them.. but nothing that made me question my sexual orientation afterwords I am very sexually liberal ..however I have never done anything that i couldnt see myself doing before hand ..now that may well be because there is not much that is on my taboo list
Here, have some context:
Once upon a time, I had a friend who took me home, introduced me to her live-in BF and live-in GF. I got involved with her BF (with her blessing). This surprised me greatly, because I'd always thought of myself as a fairly hardcore monogamist, and I never thought I would have been okay with that. No one coerced me, I instigated the kissing, it was a great night (which led to a five-year relationship with the same boy). Afterwards, I did a lot of processing. I was genuinely okay with what had happened, but it changed the way I thought of the way I conducted my relationships and what I was okay with, so it required some re-evaluating.
This may or may not be the situation with the OP. You keep assuming he's been coerced, and maybe he has; however, he did apparently agree to a threesome with another man, and perhaps he was okay with this aspect of it but just questioning what that means in terms of his sexuality. That's okay. If he was coerced or manipulated, that's another matter entirely, and I agree that manipulative behavior is very much not okay.
Your perspective may also be skewed from your environment, though I do wonder how you see all this manipulation when you've said you work at an off-premises club.
I know of many men who have had much more contact with other men than this during an experimental phase, and are in fact heterosexual. I had an experimental phase and discovered that, nope, I'm straight. Lots of people experiment. Female experimentation seems much more commonplace and accepted than male experimentation is, but that doesn't make one more okay than the other. People should have the right to explore without worrying about labeling. Further, in this instance, there's no evidence that the OP wasn't just being a good lover for his GF and fulfilling a fantasy for her. For that matter, his having done so may mean he's more likely to get fantasy fulfillment from her down the line. Good partners are willing to occasionally do things that don't do a thing for them, but that get their partners off--in a healthy relationship, this will go both ways. | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 10:42:25 AM |
That's a poor analogy--how else are you going to watch porn but on your TV/computer You are young...
Porn can be drawings, pictures, live stage, erotic books, verbal... the list is endless... my analogy was not flawed... the device you use is not the same as the end result... As the say, the media is the message....
How many gay guy do you know who would choose to use a p*ssy as a cum receptacle versus just giving a guy head?! How about one who is undecided as to whether or not he's Gay... Great way to 'sample' it but let's him still pretend to be straight...
That's not an "alternative", that's a flat-out refusal.
You're just playing with semantics... the only alternative to "Yes" is "No"... What other alternative is there....?
Protection would keep any infection one might have contracted to that one of them; on the other hand, they get to decide what risks they're willing to take with their own bodies.
Sorry, low risk factor or not... I would not have sex with someone who may be infected, condom or not... There is no such thing as 'protection', there is 'risk reduction'... the word 'protection' is like 'safe sex' it implies 100% safety. | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 10:51:08 AM |
Porn can be drawings, pictures, live stage, erotic books, verbal... the list is endless... my analogy was not flawed... the device you use is not the same as the end result... As the say, the media is the message....
Yes, and all of those are delivered through media of some sort, whether it's the TV or paper, etc. There's no direct option like there is of sucking a guy off if you want to taste cum.
That's not an "alternative", that's a flat-out refusal. You're just playing with semantics... the only alternative to "Yes" is "No"... What other alternative is there....?
How about some sort of compromise? That's typically what alternative would mean in this context: "No, I'm really not comfortable with that. Can we come up with an alternative that will still help you scratch that itch but not squick me out so much?", for instance.
Sorry, low risk factor or not... I would not have sex with someone who may be infected, condom or not... There is no such thing as 'protection', there is 'risk reduction'... the word 'protection' is like 'safe sex' it implies 100% safety.
EVERYONE may be infected. Do you just abstain from sex entirely? People get cheated on; your GF could be cheating on you. Chances are she's not, but it's possible that she is and that she's contracted something. She may be infected.
There's risk inherent in sex. Everyone needs to decide for themselves what level of risk they're willing to accept. This is why I'm a huge proponent of honest STD status/risk level conversations prior to sexual activity; so everyone can assess where they are and whether or not they're willing to take that risk with a potential new partner. | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 10:55:13 AM | | No I don't think it is gay. You were caught up in a hot moment and you were doing what she wanted u to do which I'm sure turned everyone on more. You wouldn't be gay anyways u would call it bi. Might not sound right to some people but some people are more sexually open minded. As long as u like what u did that is what is important. | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 11:02:45 AM | Your perspective may also be skewed from your environment, though I do wonder how you see all this manipulation when you've said you work at an off-premises club.
I dont know what you know about off premises clubs ..but the ones where I work the sex is the only thing forbidden... couples meet ,make out and discuss what is going to happen ..off premises ..so I see everything except the final act ..and this is where most of the manipulation occurs
I have no problem with experimentation but dont believe it should be done to please someone else ...especially when it involves something that will test you to the core
we can argue fine points till our posting limits are exceed.. I believe we believe the same things but state them differently ...I believe we are reading each other with a bias that clouds what the other is saying ...i think we agree more than we know or will admit ....on this point anyway
but as always... it is a pleasure debating you... i like friends that make me think outside of my box
Hey kaylie ..my friend where have you been ... | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 11:04:30 AM | My turn to weigh in!
I would call it kinky, not gay. If you did it out of attraction to men's semen, then perhaps you are also attracted to men. If doing it made you wish you were taking the cum straight from the tap, yes attracted to men. But if it just plain turned you on to do what your girl asked you to, then I call just kinky.
And not sick.
To me it sounds more about control, not degrading. More control as in being dominated, being told what to do. And, fwiw, lots of us like a little bit of that, me being one. PErhaps not to that degree, but I'm not everyone.
There are men and women who enjoy a dominance/submissive relationship and enjoy being under their partner's control.
I had a guy friend recently say he was going to put his girl on top of him that night when they had sex. I asked why hadn't she done that yet (to me it's a staple). His response? Because he hadn't yet told her to get on top. Is he sick? Is she? No, not at all...she just enjoys being dominated and he enjoys doing it.
Taking anotehr man's cum in your mouth and depositing it on her belly is a little masochistic. A little degrading, sure. And a little gross. And doing that for her, following her instructions to the letter for her pleasure, can certainly be a turn on for a guy or woman. Kinky, yes. A sick person? Naw...not at all. We all have kinks.
We all also have limits and clearly this is a NO for many of you. Would I do it? Well I would not have sex witha female at all...that is a big NO for me. But some variation in a 3some with 2 guys? If I was fullfilling some sort of fantasy of being controlled by 2 men, then I would. I mean, it's just cum, it's not poison. It's all part of the game. I wouldn't do it every week. LOL But if it was a one time thing I don't think it's that far out there.
I'm trying to think of a variation that is similar but less offensive to you males... Ok, i fyou had a 3some w/2 women, what if you came on one of the women's bellies then "made" the other woman lick it off. Would that make the woman sick? Would it be alittle bit degrading? Sure. But sick is carrying it a bit too far. It's just kinky. and a little gross.
And OPie, if you enjoyed it, consider yourself kinky! :) And enjoy the feeling of enjoying a little kinky sex. Not a darn thing wrong with it. And if it turns out it was the cum itself tha tturned you on and you want it next "from the tap", then go for it...hetero, bi, gay, who cares? If you are safe and it's consensual, knock your socks off! | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 12:17:55 PM |
if u liked the taste then it's gay lol
Thanks for confirming my heterosexuality.
But I think that I taste better than sperm so does that make me gay? 
OP: I don't think it's gay unless you got it straight from the tap but I do think it's extremely dangerous.
How well do you know this guy?
How well do you know her?
Did you agree to this beforehand or did you succumb to peer pressure?
clearly he is now not so comfortable with it ..now that it has happened ...and for that reason ..if he was not manipulated and it was simply her expressing a fantasy ..then he is either weak or in the closet JMO
Or he liked it so much he wants to do it again and is advertising here for that same kind of woman.
His profile says he's single.
No I didn't miss that point... but using her as a receptacle to drink another guy's juice from is only part of it... Watching Gay porn on your own Japanese TV set doesn't mean you're Japanese, it means you're GAY...
I enjoy lesbian porn but I've never kissed a girl...dam! There goes my hetero status!
That's the dumbest analogy I've ever heard church!
I watch a lot of things on tv that I find mentally stimulating that I would never do.
Watching a crime drama doesn't make me a criminal. | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 12:18:45 PM | YEAH!!!!!!!!.. I totally agree with what Kaylie said!
And OPie, if you enjoyed it, consider yourself kinky! :)
Finally.....a truly open minded person....I thought they left the planet, after reading this thread.
OP...I assume you had sex with them both without touching him AT ALL? lol
Bummer! That just ruined my fantasy.
And "BI" the way.....what's wrong with being GAY?
My GAWD this place is so repressed sometimes,or is it just latent and homophobic,uptight and closed minded?
Try not to forget the Kinsey scale peeps....there is NO NORM...just variations of sexuality and judgemental people...that's all. | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 12:46:53 PM | OP,
Gotta tell you, unless you're willing to take the full brunt of the collective judgmental( fearful?) types that hang out on these forums, hold your peace. I personally find these forums to be incredibly homophobic where men are concerned. The ladies can fantasize and propose whatever questions to their hearts contentment.
But the rules really seem to be different for guys.
I'm with the poster who suggests that you're attempting to process this experience; as well as all of the other posters who make no homosexual imputations at all. These are the thinkers IMHO, the rest...well you see how they've responded. | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/29/2009 12:55:36 PM | closer I never said he was gay ...and i never said there was anything wrong with being gay
what I said is I got the impression that she manipulated him to do something he was uncomfortable doing ... an act that in his mind puts him in the position of doing a gay act ...which i got the impression he was experiencing anguish for having done it ...so if he did it not wanting to it means that he is either weak to her influence or ...in the closet
the exact same as women who do the bi thing just to satisfy their man ...they are either weak to his influence or secretly bi ...and i still say that manipulators have issues
Try not to forget the Kinsey scale peeps....there is NO NORM...just variations of sexuality
that may be but there are stages we cross stages from straight to bi to gay ...we may have the disposition to be gay but never crossing the line we may never know ...hell I consider myself straight as an arrow ...but I may have some gay thoughts/tendencies... and I will be damn if i cross that line to please a woman ... if i did and liked it I might just find out I am gay ...and thats something if it exist im just as happy not knowing
its like the several men that I have known that have convinced their wives that they were bi and then ..the wife found out she liked women more than she did manipulative men and left the husband for another woman ...if not for him and his fantasies she would or may have been perfectly happy being completely straight
the politically correct opinion and the way most people believe is that if you are gay you are gay ...and if straight you are straight ..and for some this is true ..but I believe that today there are situational gay and bi people ...especially women ..because it has become popular for a woman to be BI ..i believe there are many ,who if not for the popularity or for some manipulative man ...would have been perfectly happy being completely straight | |
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/30/2009 6:14:30 AM | closer I never said he was gay ...and i never said there was anything wrong with being gay
lol...i never said YOU said he was gay or that there was anything wrong with it.
Alot of OTHER people said that. I am not trying to be "Politically Correct"
I just know there is no way there can be a norm when people come from so many different back grounds and ways of thinking and acting and experimenting and growing into themselves sexually.Sometimes we cross lines we never thought we would and I see no shame in that.
If HE feels odd after the fact he knows not to go there again.
But to feel the need to ask if it's GAY or label himself gay because he did what he did is a waste of worry if you ask me.
Sh*t happens.
I have done some things in my life that I look back on now and think...WTF was I thinking!But I never feel ashamed or afraid or label myself the way some feel the need to do, because it doesn't define me so rigidly.
I do believe in Bi-Sexuality and leaning towards one sex or the other more.I find people who are 'kinky' or who live "outside the box" to be enlightening,evolved and open-minded.That's all I meant.
Maybe i just take issue with labels is all.
that may be but there are stages we cross stages from straight to bi to gay ...we may have the disposition to be gay but never crossing the line we may never know ...hell I consider myself straight as an arrow ...but I may have some gay thoughts/tendencies... and I will be damn if i cross that line to please a woman ... if i did and liked it I might just find out I am gay ...and thats something if it exist im just as happy not knowing
Hey now...don't make me renig my statement about your sexual evolvement~ lol
I have crossed the "line" and I can tell you one thing........best line I ever tasted!
Just another experience I in my book.I still love men.But had I not crossed that line I would never know what I was missing.
To each thier own.No one really has the right to label anyone is my contention.
Defining ourselves on ONE out of the norm act is just silly.Even if he had sex with the man who came in his chick,I would not call him GAY.
I would call him Sexperimental.
Or TRY-Sexual.I think it took GUTS to do what he did AND to come here and tell us.
Whatever floats your boat and all that, but this thread is just some guy seeking attention.
THAT could be said about every single thread started here...or he simply needed some VALIDATION.Poor men.....slip outside the box and every societally conditioned thought is a force to reckon with.
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| I had girl ask me to suck anoher guys juices out of her is that gay act
Posted: 7/30/2009 6:29:07 AM |
Message: blew load in her then I got it out of her
You let another man **** your girl without a condom on? And people wonder how they get STDs even after they test clean!!!!
Now, to answer your question....No, it's not gay. It's erotic for some men I guess and for some women apparently because this was your gf's fantasy!
OMG, did you do it? If so, how did it taste? Does the guy eat a lot of pineapple? | |
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