| Is it fair to be friends with your ex?
Posted: 10/19/2009 8:25:55 PM | | I am friends with my ex who lives in washington, dc. We turned in to the Ealina nd Jerry relationship on seinfield. Meaning we are friends. He calls me about dating issues and that is about it. | |
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| Is it fair to be friends with your ex?
Posted: 10/19/2009 8:52:18 PM | | Cynical as I am, I cannot see a blanket condemnation of contact between your partner and his/her ex as fair or reasonable. In fact, it is pretty damned controlling and unreasonable. You must be terribly insecure about your ability to hold on to your partner. | |
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| Is it fair to be friends with your ex?
Posted: 10/19/2009 8:56:18 PM | ...Ideally it is better to be able to be friends with your ex....
You may have good reasons to be threatened by this relationship...or perhaps you are bringing your insecurities to the picture.
Sometimes people get along better apart than as a couple.....if you feel secure in the fact that your partner is committed to you- I think you shoul try to open yourself to the fact that this "other" is not a threat.
I think comunication is MORE important than ever when you have kids together....that statement alone makes me think you are feeling insecure- overall....talk to her.....clarify.....let her make you feel better | |
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| Is it fair to be friends with your ex?
Posted: 10/19/2009 9:18:48 PM | If you fully trust your significant other, then you should be comfortable knowing that one is able to love somebody without necessarily *being in love*. You only have a right to step in if you smell something fishy going on (and it's not your paranoia).
I can honestly say that I've never gotten jealous if a boyfriend is still friends with his ex. Then again, my boyfriends have always made me feel extremely special, and I never felt as though they still had feelings for anybody else.
Many people think I'm being naive, though. And maybe I am. But it's never caused me a problem.
Whatever. Who knows. I'm only 22. I have a lot of living and learning to do still. I could be wrong. I'll check back with you in a few decades.  | |
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| Is it fair to be friends with your ex?
Posted: 10/20/2009 1:20:45 AM | | NO NO NO!!! I have a good friend, her and the ex still get together and have dinner with the kids, or meet to take them shopping. Now also her bf does the same with his ex..... they both have an issue with the other doing it. I myself do not do this.... yes there are times that you two as parents will have to be around one another such as school functions but there's no need in going together. There's a reason they are your ex and the new bf/gf will have a problem also i see it as disrespectful. Just being on friendly terms is another situation but getting together and doing stuff.... NO. | |
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| Is it fair to be friends with your ex?
Posted: 10/20/2009 1:24:21 AM | I think the one that is mistrusting is the one that limits friendships from the past, whether or not they are an ex.
How trusting of your current partner and their feelings are you if you can't believe the past is in the past. | |
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| Is it fair to be friends with your ex?
Posted: 10/20/2009 2:17:03 AM | "Is it fair to be friends with your ex?""
I dont think its about fairness or the trust issues.I just don't see the point in remaining friends.
if there are kids there will always be contact and adults try to keep that amicable for clear reasons.
But really, why bother to stay friends with someone when a relationships over, its run its course. End of. | |
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| Is it fair to be friends with your ex?
Posted: 10/20/2009 2:37:49 AM | I want to respectfully disagree with the statement, I believe it is perfectly normal to stay friends with an ex boyfriend or ex girlfriend although many times it is the guy that wants to stay friends and not the girl. I think if the woman your with cannot except you being friends with an ex then most likely they are not going to want to except you being friends with any other female.
Your right about the whole trust thing, but I think for trust to be broken there should be a better reason then simply being friends with someone, if a person has done nothing and has not given any reason to break the trust what grounds are there to stand on?
I think all of this mis-trust in ex's stems from an insecurity created in the past the whole "one guy or girl did it, they all will" if you go into a relationship with insecurities the relationship isn't going to work any way. My best advice to someone working on issues like that is to reevaluate their own self confidence level and work on it those who are very self confident often have less trust issues.
nicholas | |
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