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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/11/2009 5:17:06 PM |
Okay, rejection is an interpretation or point of view. Perhaps it's just no for now due to something that has nothing to do with rejecting you (for example?)
- Does not matter so much what the reason for the rejection is... if the other person likes you, it's going against their free will... which will hurt to the degree that they like you/feel that they need you. No getting around rejection, no sure fire way to avoid it when dating (but you can learn to get less rejection)... and yes, across the board, men get rejected more.
It's a real war zone out there. But when you do get a successful relationship and keep it... you are out of the war zone... and you only need to find one good one (see, not so bad!). | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/11/2009 5:51:09 PM |
I think Pure is talking about some women who maybe in abusive-dependancy type relationships? I sounds like he is into some kind of conselling job. These maybe worse case scenerios. I think most women today would leave and abusive relationship pretty quick.
You'd be surprised at the number of women who deal with that type of guy, and stay in the relationship. Trust me. Not all women are as "quick to leave" as they pretend they are. | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/12/2009 12:37:47 AM |
Nah. I've SEEN animals. It's the FEMALE who initiates the mating ritual. Men just preen around until ONE female indicates she's interested in mating, and then, the males fight, until SHE picks one to mate with. If a male tries to initiate foreplay with a female before she's shown she's interested, then in the animal kingdom, she'll BITE him, HARD!
The male is the first to show interest then the female either accepts, or denies.
That's exactly how it works. And I never said anything about "Mating" I was talking about showing "Interest" There is a difference.
Seriously. Lighten up. Don't take anyone seriously till they've PROVED they are worth it, and women's looks and their ability to get you laid doesn't count in that. Good-looking women are like rich men. Many are a**holes, and even though they are rich, and pretend they'll spend their money on you, doesn't mean they'll do it. The only thing rich men and good-looking women respect is men who stand up to them, and will treat them as if they were poor, and ugly. Do that, and they'll be crawling all over you, and if they aren't, you won't care. You'll just get another one to hang with.
I don't understand this paragraph. Can you explain in, oh I dunno, English..? | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/12/2009 4:29:52 AM |
I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
I would agree with you OP - IF we were talking about spiders.
The ONLY thing that Some women may have easier than men in the world of love, dating and relationships is Getting Laid. Even then, Not "all" men are easy.
When you learn how to 'read' the opposite sex - you will learn to read those (Initiation) signals that women put out (Some women).
Some Women DO initiate and Some have even been known to propose!! ergo
Women are just as capable of being rejected as men. And OP - if you really think that all "we" have to do is 'sit there' and he will come to us - Please tell me where that is! I'd love to have it as "easy" as you think we have it!!! lol
Relationships take Work - whether you're male or female.
Love? Men and Women both feel it, therefore both stand the same chance of feeling the hurt of a broken heart.
Dating? - Like I said - you tell me "where" women have it so easy that we just hve to "sit there"
Sex? - Yep - If I want to get laid and have Zero criteria for who I do the horizontal dance with I could probly walk out my door and find a willing coyote!!! lol ..
The "sex" part IS easier for a woman (if that's all she wants) because of biology. Good thing too, as our species has already taken up too much space on this planet IMO! lol ..
That said - Most of us still prefer men who act like Men - Strong, emotionally stable and not prone to whining about women in general. ya know? | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/12/2009 6:18:45 AM | | I think it's a lot harder for women I mean yeah a lot of the time a man makes the first move but not always are his intensions good ones. I find that women find it hard because a lot of men are commitment phobic (not all men just a lot of them). I have heard some men say they have met girls they really like but feel they haven't slept around enough so they won't commit. Women I find tend to look for someone who will compliment their personality and everything men don't seem to be as selective when it comes to things like this as they tend to go looks first. Like i said before not all men but a large amount | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/12/2009 6:58:56 AM | well it must depends on the girl age, and what is she hoping for and a man, and what kind of a man,I think man have easy, because they just look at a woman and make a play and next thing in the bed with her, however..... and this I belive is rare.... if he is looking for a real true friendship frist, then a woman or lover,then yes he will have a time, but time will come, the reason why most girls have it easy, especially the younger ones, they are not yet what the word?... settle, they also looks on the inside and jump right into the bed, or looks at what money he may have in his pocket and jumps right into his bed..... so yes any loose man or woman can get a girl or boy, but a wise woman, she waits.... a old fashion like myself and older... have a hard time.... a wise man and with age will have a hard time...... a fool is easy to get..... they are all in the bars... and other places... with fool written on their butts,chest, and speak it out their mouth, but a pudent woman or man..... who can fine? | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/12/2009 8:15:23 AM | The message that all these woman seem to be repeating is that it's difficult to find the perfect guy that matches your expectation. What most of us guys are saying is that our experience is difficult from the very start. Most men have it bad because women generally have most of the control over the initial stages of the relationship. It is fine that about five percent of the female population are brave enough to approach men. However you still have the 95 percent of women who demand that men approach them. This is primarily because lets face it, rejecting men is easier than approaching men. Some women even use this to kick guys around like trash.
In addition, to this most men have to be focused in life as far as an occupation goes because many see how self-esteem and the general demands of society are interconnected with this. For women their occupational choices are influenced by their personal desires. However, for men this could make or break you socially. In other words it has a greater impact on the lives of most men. Lets face it we live in a materialistic society. So your occupation is going to have big impact on the type of women that you attract. Women don't have this added pressure. Sure some women spend hundreds of dollars to on dresses, make-up, and hair-dos to attract a man, but that can't match the blood and sweat that men have to shed to get to an acceptable place in life.
Also, most men aren't only attracted to just a woman's pretty looks. If that were the case then an attractive prostitute would be an ideal date. However, this is not the case. Most men, if they were not looking just for sex, would like to have someone with a brain as well as a positive personality.
One other thing, I believe one lady made a comment on men whining about women having it easy. Of course women will say this. We both have different perspectives. So many opinions of men will appear to be a complete joke for women. To add to this, let's remember we are living in a society that has lost the social interconnectivity that we once had years ago. This has had more of a negative affect on men than women. | |
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mtw24
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Joined: 7/28/2009
Msg: 417 | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:07:10 PM | Oh wow, just had to get my 1/2 of a cent worth in on this one ...
It never ceases to amaze me the amount of negativity I see people putting out there in these forums about the opposite sex. It makes me wonder why they are even on a dating site to begin with, if they have such a disregard, even disrespect, for someone on the other side of the gender board ... lol
I can only speak for myself, but I have basically been single for over 10 years ... so if that's called getting a date whenever I want it, boy I have been wanting something totally different then. One night I even went out to the well-known pick up bar in my area with the full intention of finding a man, any man, it really didn't matter, to have a one night stand with ... it didn't happen and I came home alone.
It is no easier for a woman than it is for a man to find whatever it is that they are looking for, both sexes always seem to have a coloured version of what the other is going through. | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:15:52 PM | | A man and woman who see only their own difficulties and not those of their counterpart will make it harder for themselves by making it impossible for the other. You need to understand things from the other side in order to get along. Help each other make it easier and it will be. Demand to be accommodated and you'll get nowhere. Work together as a team on this. It's good practice in case when you wind up wanting to have sex, one of you needs to hold the flashlight while the other fumbles with the key to the chastity belt. Work as a team. | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:17:39 PM |
It's a scientific fact that women generally have the upper hand in dating and relationships
I'd love to see the results of that "scientific" research. I googled looking for "scientific" research and all I find are forum posts much like this one. Opinions are not fact nor are they scientific.
~OT~ Like others here, I can only speak for myself. Meeting someone isn't easy, and if you don't meet, you aren't likely dating. It doesn't really matter what venue, whether offline or on, the options are slim, and getting from point A to point B is next to impossible. If it were easy for women ~ I seriously doubt I'd be sitting here in POF forums weekend after weekend reading/posting silliness. I'd be out having it easy, dating like a fiend. I don't think it's just me, I think it's tough for BOTH genders unless one doesn't care who/what they are meeting/dating and just filling time with members of the opposite sex (or the same sex if that's what one prefers.) If you want more than time-filler, it's likely going to take a good deal of patience, some serious luck and a lot of time invested. JMO  | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/12/2009 3:32:41 PM | Brilliant post, Gold_one_in_CT.
A man and woman who see only their own difficulties and not those of their counterpart will make it harder for themselves by making it impossible for the other.
Brilliant post as well.
It's a scientific fact that women generally have the upper hand in dating and relationships
Only with insecure men who are pvssy whipped.
It never ceases to amaze me the amount of negativity I see people putting out there in these forums about the opposite sex.
It actually amuses me to no end...
It is no easier for a woman than it is for a man to find whatever it is that they are looking for, both sexes always seem to have a coloured version of what the other is going through.
I can't tell you how many women I know (either professionally or as friends) who are always asking WTF?...."Why can't I find a good guy?" "All I meet are losers".
A high percentage of them have this really long wish list of requirements, and are entirely unrealistic of how they compare to all the other women out there who want the exact same elusive single guy. I often sit silent and listen, and try to avoid being the one to tell them that I don't think they'll ever get what they're hoping to get.
But I think that's the fault of society that keeps drilling it into people that if you set your mind to it, you'll eventually get it, all you need is patience....
I think there's a lot of sad people in the making, both men and women.... | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/12/2009 10:53:18 PM | Well, it's like a contest that has really f*d up rules, but a big prize to the winner:
A) Do you play the game because of the potential prize, despite the f*d up rules?
B) Do you say 'this game is b-sh-t' and decide not to play because the rules are so offensive to you?
C) Or do you try and find a way to bend or break the rules and get the prize?
Of course C is better than A or B but C isn't always possible. I won't say either A or B is more honorable but you have to go with your heart. I guess I'm in the 'B' mode right now but as Hyman Roth said in the Godfather, "This is the lifestyle that I have chosen" for better or worse.
But don't hold your breath expecting women to feel your pain on this issue. You might get some sympathy but it's impossible to get empathy. It's a proven fact that peoples' reproductive mandates and desires are stronger than logic and reason lol. | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/12/2009 11:58:00 PM | | I have been saying the exact opposite all along on here...No offense to the good guys on here...wherever you may be but....I find that many of my guy friends...they have no problems finding a girl they are interested in and starting a relationship...girls are more likely to want relationships...(me included)...SO...I have found that I have met many guys that aren't really looking for a relationship...they are looking for a hookup or fwb...while there are girls out there who do this...I'm sure the percentage is way less compared to guys...so you say that the guy has to do all the work? Just ask..!!! I have no problem following up on a date with a phone call or text...but then it's not reciprocated...maybe it's just me...but if I'm interested I make sure they know (I'm not real forward about it or anything but..I at least put myself out there a little)....and it always turns into nothing! Maybe it's just not my time...but I disagree with part of your statement.. I think girls have it much harder when it comes to finding a relationship....lets put it that way....but I agree that you have more pressure to make the first move... | |
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| I think Girls have it a lot easier than Guys when it comes to Love, Dating, Relationships, etc.
Posted: 9/13/2009 12:37:41 AM | Good points George. That list pretty much sums up where a guy maybe at in any given time.
The rules, while alot of guys don't know them or like to follow all of them, pretty much are governed by genetics and where people's heads are at in any given time. Guy's generally want to hook up with as many and most visually appealing fertile women as possible, while women want to select a strong male that will protect her and stick around and help raise the kids (subconscious drives quite often.) I think feminism with custody cases divorce settlements or cases where abuse may occur (her word is usually taken over his) some guys maybe even more reluctant to engage in long term relationships. Media, academics and special interest may have propped the expectation for ideal males to such a level that meeting it is next to impossible. Decline in marriages and the number of children is probably related to the new expectations out there.
How to get women generally is pretty much well known. The guy initiates the first contact by asking the lady out. Women generally like men who are confident (don't like whiner's obviously,) they want someone who's funny, someone who's sensitive that listens to them, puts them on a pedestal, someone's that loyal, someone that isn't cheap, abit of a bad boy, good looks help, and someone who'll back them up when the get older or lose their jobs etc... There are more I believe. Anything else?!? So what did they do to deserve all this? I think females tend to outnumber males by 50.1% farther. This varies by region as well.
So a guy goes through all that (follows the rules does everything right or tries anyhow) only to get divorced (half or more marriages end in divorce.) Then he'll probably end up paying all kinds of money in the divorce (common law relationships and half of earnings entitlement is what 3 months now living with someone in Canada?!?) and maybe losing the house and maybe seeing the kids on the weekends.
Heck even the perceptions and comments by the men and women just on this thread are quite different even though everything is supposed to be equal all of a sudden. Studies show women generally reason up to 30% emotionally rather then logically. Even socialization is different between men and women. Security (as some women are worried about the safety of their children) is quite often a bigger deal with women. The media and politicians play on this quite often; civil liberties well, to "iffy" or suspect events and knee-jerk reaction, the cameras are usually on the women some of which want instant clampdowns.
Many people, myself included, bring past relationships into the judgment of the opposite sex. This tends to create biases or unreal or difficult to achieve expectations. It's hard to shut off how a partner burned you in the past and expect it to occur again or to paint all with the same brush. My last two cost alot of money. The final one left me without saying even goodbye after over two years in a relationship after I spent a bunch of money while she was over here recently. So I'm spouting off about money now and I will be really careful with money in another relationship if and when it happens.
It's hard to find the ideal partner. You have to ask or get asked out. You have to go through the dating process etc until you like or find the right person. Alot of outside influences have or will effect the relationship. Dating and life is expensive. And there is no guarantee it will last in the long run after everything. Just hearing men and women's different perspectives sounds like bridging the differences can be difficult. | |
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