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 Author Thread: sex drive in women over 40
 totoman

Joined: 12/12/2008
Msg: 76
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 8/31/2009 8:22:37 PM
This is a hard thing and I don't mean to make light of it... because nature was cruel. But now you know what it was like being male in our late teens and early twenties .
 Sapphireeyes

Joined: 1/13/2008
Msg: 77
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 8/31/2009 8:27:55 PM
I think the sex drive I have is definately related to who I am with...the more I care the more I want them.
 Mtn.lover

Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 78
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 8/31/2009 9:57:43 PM
Well, I'm glad all you older ladies have such a high sex drive....at least the sex toy industry is benefiting from it......if they sell stock, maybe us men could benefit too. It could be the first time in history that a womans sexuality has put money in our pockets instead of taking it out.
 afashionlady

Joined: 4/19/2008
Msg: 79
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 4:44:41 AM
^^^^^^^^^^^

OK "mtn.lover"...that's twice you've mentioned BOB's...dude doesn't your****work? Or who ticked you off? One of us "older ladies" tell you no?

You're constantly going on and on about sex toys...you SHOULD be trying to tap one of us "old, horny broads" instead of whining about BOB's. Nothing worse than a bitter man who either can't or won't get it up. You might reconsider your bitterness and rechannel some of that energy into getting LAID.

As one of these women you're whining about, I am GLAD that my sex drive is in high speed. At least if I find a younger man who can keep up (obviously YOU can't or you wouldn't be whining so hard) I know I'll be satisfied.

OP--rock that sexual energy for as long as you can. One day you'll wake up (like this guy) and it'll be gone.

I hope when that happens to me I'll already be dead!
 whytwater

Joined: 8/7/2008
Msg: 80
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 5:13:14 AM

OK "mtn.lover"...that's twice you've mentioned BOB's...dude doesn't your****work? Or who ticked you off? One of us "older ladies" tell you no?
You're constantly going on and on about sex toys...you SHOULD be trying to tap one of us "old, horny broads" instead of whining about BOB's. Nothing worse than a bitter man who either can't or won't get it up. You might reconsider your bitterness and rechannel some of that energy into getting LAID.
As one of these women you're whining about, I am GLAD that my sex drive is in high speed. At least if I find a younger man who can keep up (obviously YOU can't or you wouldn't be whining so hard) I know I'll be satisfied.


LOL! Yep, this mating dance is a contact sport!! So's posting in these forums.

MtnLover, meet Earth woman, aka AFashionLady. Lol Hey, AFL, crank up the volume on that message, loud enough for both genders to hear clearly. And btw, it's not the age of the dog in the fight that determines the "winner". In fairness, MtnLover's carping comments about women resorting to toys is not all that inconsistent with AFL's admonishment to "git after it". I've seen lotsa folks advising women to break out their Black & Deckers when the going gets tough, or sparse, and lots of others, not always tongue in cheek, compare their toys favorably to a man. lol

OP, 60 is the new 40, just as 30 is the new 17. imho

AFL, pancaking your opponent is really good in football. In the man/woman mix, not so much.
 LondonTonic

Joined: 8/29/2009
Msg: 81
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 7:41:31 AM
That is too funny Wolftxus.

 Mtn.lover

Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 82
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 9:22:53 AM
AFL, Sugar...before you take the bait, you should always check for hooks. We just found out who has the biggest rubber willy collection on POF. Don't feel bad dear, most older womans top night stand drawer look like the sausage cooler at the grocery store.
 Fl_09

Joined: 8/3/2009
Msg: 83
sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 1:39:07 PM
Wow well i can say some things about this one. IM 24. i have gone with a few older women. Of the ones ive been with. A few were 45 or so. The 45 yr olds were about a million times more sexual then any 21yr old.. Women hit their peak when they are in their upper 30's and 40's. Which is odd. Because most women hit their peak for beauty around 21. But thats nature for you. But anyways. Women tend to learn things that they didnt know when they were in their 20's. It takes a bit longer for them. Thus this is the reason why alot of younger girls drink. So that they can feel sexual and lower their inhibitions. Because its not coming natural to them. Who really knows why women hit their peak so late. Nobody really knows. I mean most guys say all the time why doesnt a female hit her peak in sexuality when shes in her 20's and hot.
 northernexposure888

Joined: 2/3/2009
Msg: 84
Unkempt Husbands
Posted: 9/1/2009 2:12:22 PM
I don't doubt many women feel a reduction in sexual desire when they age but based on what my friends told me its more a factor of no longer being attracted to their sloth-like, selfish, unkempt husbands than plummeting hormones.


From what I see, most of the sloth-like, selfish, unkempt husbands are married to sloth-like, selfish, unkempt wives.

tu quo·que

 outdoorgirlsunshine

Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 85
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 2:27:33 PM
Just a minute here Mr. mtn.lover. My Bob has a cord and 3 prong plug in. None of these cheesy double a battery thing for me!. Na. Only the best! But I sure don't have a collection, don't need one. Speaking of Black & Decker, it could be a belt sander.

outdoorgirl
 Mtn.lover

Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 86
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 2:54:03 PM
Outdoorgirl, Now you're talkin.....always buy the best first. I'm getting ready to retire another ten million men with my latest invention..."The turbo magnum muff buster". I used the motor out of my lawn tractor. My first test subject just left for the dentist office. She had a great time, but all the fillings came out of her teeth.
 Highflyingadored

Joined: 3/18/2006
Msg: 87
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 3:02:29 PM
^^^^^^^^ mtn.lover thanks for the laugh - you just made my day rotfl.
 kthyg

Joined: 11/24/2006
Msg: 88
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 4:21:33 PM
I have not hit my 40's yet but I do know that 30 kicked it up a bunch of notches and frankly, I'm a little scared if 40's are more sexual. I'll have to quit my job to have sex full time. Guess I better make a few million by then.

I do have to say I am skeeved out by the guy who said women hit the peak of their beauty at 21. Makes me wonder when he thinks they start their peak, 13?
 sweet lady Lori

Joined: 3/19/2008
Msg: 89
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 5:25:37 PM
Ah, I love this talk about women peaking only at a certain age....so funny.

Trust me, there is no age limit ~ all we women need to (continue) to peak is a man who knows how to get us there!!
 afashionlady

Joined: 4/19/2008
Msg: 90
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 5:35:15 PM

We just found out who has the biggest rubber willy collection on POF. Don't feel bad dear, most older womans top night stand drawer look like the sausage cooler at the grocery store.




Honey...I like it LIVE...hard, breathing, sweating, and hard...HARD...!!!

I don't own a BOB baby...they can't compare to a real, breathing, hot man...BOB's aren't sex in my book, and they're not even a damn good replacement!

Sweetie...just cause someone calls you out doesn't mean that they are guilty of whatever you're blathering on about. I just happened to notice that you, in particular, seemed to think that women were stocking up on D cells and the like, just because our sex drive was higher. That's so not always the case. Maybe if you could take a "test drive" you'd find out for yourself.

Whytwater baby...now you know I walk my talk...


AFL, pancaking your opponent is really good in football. In the man/woman mix, not so much


And MY idea of "pancaking"...honey...comes with a big ole jug of sweet, sticky, warm syrup on a nice-sized plate...ready for eating!
 Hang2HeartU

Joined: 8/16/2009
Msg: 91
sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 8:06:35 PM
Show me one that isn't "...Too Far Away..!" and I'll care for her like there's No Tomorrow...!!!
*Distance* has killed a LOT more Good relationships than ANY other 'excuse'...!!!
 85032Luck

Joined: 3/16/2006
Msg: 92
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 8:27:57 PM
As young lads we've always had the hots for older women
(probibly caused by finding those poorly guarded playboy magazines, at our young age)
gathering in the dugout, dropping our mits, baseball cards and bubble gum, to sneak forbidden looks at a fully developed twenty something centerfolds (nearly twice our age)
"sooooooo thats what a grown woman looks like,,,, neeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaato"
somehow through our growing up, we've become intrigued with those hot older women. makes you wonder? are women getting sexier by age or sexed up 'cuz they still turn heads?
 Mtn.lover

Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 93
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/1/2009 9:47:47 PM
AFL, Sugar.. you completely missed my point. All you hot, high sex drive women out there just bragging away, and twenty million men still have to choke their chicken. Something's taken care of business honey...but it sure as hell ain't us! You know the term "strings attached" right?.....when it comes to you older women, you don't play with strings.....it's ropes! I've never dated an older woman more than twice before I was ask about my feelings toward future marriage.....I might have to handle one eyed willy myself for the rest of my life, but I'm not going to be sized up for a womans security. Another thing Sugar, you older gals are just too damn expensive. You gals have got houses, cars, lawn mowers, appliances, and every one of them is falling apart and waiting for some dumb goober to do ten thousand dollars worth of labor and materials for fifty dollars worth of lovin. I've never had a woman that I was dating, ever lift one finger to help me in my house. As Bob Dylan says.....it ain't me babe! Your mama and Jesus has put it in your pretty little heads that your fuzzy thing is power and power is money. Somehow us poor men got dupped into thinking old "one eyed willy" ain't worth nothin....and if that's the case, I'll just keep him to myself...and my time and money too. Oh..I know, that fuzzy thing doesn't always have a price on it, but when it's "Even Steven".....that seventeen year old bag boy down at the grocery store is about to get seduced, so the secret doesn't get out. You see Sugar, what you call bitterness, I call wisdom and freedom. Would I like a nice set a mammaries flattened out on my chest....you bet!....am I willing to pay for everything, be responsible of all your intertainment, get called at 2:00 am about your busted hot water heater, listen to hours of drama about your kids and grandchildren, put up with your dogs and cat's? Sugar, that's a damn high price to pay for a tiny bit of sack time. I think I'll just suffer the misery with my like minded buddies, hunting, camping, fishing and traveling, while you hot blooded ladies feel sorry for us. You might have been closer to a fair deal in your twenties before all the baggage, but you gals have priced yourselves out of the market with your priorities. Here are the facts, you women get all the love and attention you need from your, kids, grandkids and pets....men are nothing more than a free source of intertainment and free home repairs. You also get your sex and think it serves as payment to us... I don't see it that way. I put as much value on my body as you put on yours....so we are even when it come to sex IMO. In all the other areas, we come out with the short end of the stick. Is there a solution to the problem?.....well, there might be. After we've spent a thousand dollars winning and dinning you spoiled rotten women, you might try to tear yourself away from your grandkids and mini zoo long enough to cook us a home cooked meal once in a while to show some appreciation. THIS HAS BEEN A POF PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT...just in case some of you high sex drive ladies are wondering why we're not breaking your door down to get in your panties.
 afashionlady

Joined: 4/19/2008
Msg: 94
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/2/2009 12:33:39 AM
Mtn.lover...

No, it IS bitterness and disappointment that keeps you going. Perhaps a younger woman like me who doesn't have those issues would be more your speed...as long as you can keep up!

After almost going blind trying to read your wall of text (paragraphs are you friend...), let me keep my response short and to the point. I'm 15 yrs younger than you and don't have that baggage (you're assuming a lot) you're claiming I should have.

1) I am not one of your females that thinks a man has to spend money on me to get my time. You have to spend TIME with me to get my time. In fact SUGAR, if a man starts trying to take me to expensive places right off the bat, I shut him down--there's not going to be a steak and a blow job for dinner for him that night.

2) I don't go after anyone 17...or anyone under 35 for that matter. I'll be 46 shortly and have some sense. I'm not some mindless sex twit floating around. I'm not a cougar--I don't believe in sexing up some child for my entertainment. Please...that's not entertaining. The men I date are intelligent and know what they want and like--and they're MATURE, grown ass men who don't whine about their past relationships and spend time comparing me to the women with the repair issues. I'm not some Mrs. Robinson who has no filter on herself SUGAR.

3) Having never been married AND never having kids, I don't qualify for the grandma with grandkids thing nor the mom with whiny kids thing. And if I did have kids, I would damn well know where their dad was, he'd be supporting them like a real man should, AND there's a whole village of people behind me to help me out. I can't help it that you're meeting women with no help SUGAR.

4) Anything I own, SUGAR, is repaired by or taken care of or paid for BY ME. Car, house, bills...as I told another man recently, "I didn't ask you to pay a bill nor will I EVER ask for it because then I'm owing you." It works this way--if I can't pay for it, then I don't have it. SOME of us don't sell our "fuzzie thing" to the man who'll pay for it SUGAR. I believe that's called scruples.

5) The men who've managed to make it to "sack time" with me don't call it that and have earned that time by being themselves. They show up on time, treat me with courtesy and respect, and are attentive to me--and not worried about me trying to get into their wallets because I've shown myself as better than that. And SUGAR, they don't get it to hit it right off the bat--I might have a high sex drive but I've got more than enough sense to not give it up just because some guy took his Viagra and thinks that a dinner and a movie gets him laid!! None of this "fix my stuff and I'll screw you" crap either--that goes back to the paying for crap thing that doesn't happen in my world.

6) I cook--all the time. A man who gets a homecooked meal from me knows good damn and well that I'm doing it because I LIKE him and want him to in my world and in my home. And MAYBE, if he's lucky, in my bed.

7) My 20's sucked. I had no clue of who I was nor what I wanted with myself, much less with a man. And actually I'm better looking and BETTER overall at 45 than I was at 25. I'm not one of your smoking, drinking, barstool hugging old hags that needs an old guy to take care of me SUGAR. If I didn't tell people my age, they wouldn't believe me.

8) My FATHER is the one who said that you need to be your own woman--the first time you let a man "take care of you" is the last time you have any self-pride. A real man doesn't want a woman who depends on him for things. Last week my car broke down. You know who I called? The tow service. There's at least 3 men I could have tried to reach but didn't--they wouldn't have been able to help anyway, and I don't abuse my friends like that. Oh and I paid for that with my OWN money SUGAR.

Your POF public service announcement MIGHT hold some water with me if I were your age mtn.lover, but as a 45 yr old woman with none of the baggage you've run across...baby you don't know me. I'm not one of a dying breed--there's a BUNCH of us out here and you SUGAR are the type of guy we avoid like the plague. You don't see a good thing right under your noses--a single woman with no kids and no exes floating around should be a gem and a jewel to the right man. Instead, you all will chase after that woman that DOES have that baggage, waggles her "fuzzie thing" at you--then get pissed off when she mistreats you (aka takes your woefully tired money).

If you spent more time with women who had some pride about themselves and were willing to give of themselves freely, with NO strings attached, you'd understand what I mean.

MY "fuzzie thing" doesn't have a price tag stamped on it SUGAR. You and your public service announcement need to move on.
 Mtn.lover

Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 95
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/2/2009 2:34:00 AM
AFL, "Public service message" meant that it was a generality and not pointed directly at you Sugar. Yeah honey, I know there are a few women that don't fall into that catagory....about one in a hundred thousand. My problem is, I've been culling through that hundred thousand for 61 years, and I'm going to be worm food before the math works in my favor. My old bachelor buddies feel the same way, and we joke about it often. The long and short of it is this, men my age have had our share, we grew up in the free love years before aids and didn't miss a thing. My willy works the same as it did when I was twenty, but so does my four wheel drive, fishing rods and rifles. That fuzzy thing doesn't hold any mystery that us older guys haven't experienced many times. It's actually comical to us when we see profiles of 50 and 60 year old women posing like a Penthouse centerfold. That's the equivalent of Don Knots doing a Mr. Universe pose. No matter how old a woman is, she still thinks that coochie is her bargaining chip.......better throw them damn cats out of the house and find some pots and pans. None of this is of your concern Sugar....you're still young enough where these joking comments don't apply.
 widowsdesire

Joined: 4/7/2009
Msg: 96
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/2/2009 7:13:42 PM

It's actually comical to us when we see profiles of 50 and 60 year old women posing like a Penthouse centerfold. That's the equivalent of Don Knots doing a Mr. Universe pose. No matter how old a woman is, she still thinks that coochie is her bargaining chip.......better throw them damn cats out of the house and find some pots and pans. None of this is of your concern Sugar....you're still young enough where these joking comments don't apply.


Mtn. lover, I happen to be 54, will turn 55 this month. I too take offense at your generalization about women. I have never used sex as a bargaining chip. I am not "in" to casual sex, at this stage in my life I want an emotional connection as well as a physical one. That does not mean a man who gets involved with me is being suckered or taken advantage.

I am not looking for a meal ticket, I can take care of myself, pay my own bills and am debt free.

I know how to cook, and am quite good at it thank you. I make my boyfriend a homecooked meal weekly. In fact we prefer to eat at home rather than going out.
I make dinner, he takes me out for breakfast. It seems an equitable exchange.

If he happens to do a handyman chore for me it is appreciated. You do things for people you care about. We do things for each other. Its an even wash.

Only one in one hundred thousand women does not fit your generalization? I find that hard to believe. I wonder what it is about you that this is the only type woman you seem to encounter. There are plenty of great women out there that don't fit your description. You just aren't looking in the right place.
 whytwater

Joined: 8/7/2008
Msg: 97
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/2/2009 7:48:31 PM

I know how to cook, and am quite good at it thank you. I make my boyfriend a homecooked meal weekly. In fact we prefer to eat at home rather than going out.
I make dinner, he takes me out for breakfast. It seems an equitable exchange.
If he happens to do a handyman chore for me it is appreciated. You do things for people you care about. We do things for each other. Its an even wash.


From each according to his/her abilities, to each according to h/h needs. Marxism doesn't work that well as a political construct, at least in our current developmental stage, but as a purely domestic policy, between just two humans, partners, it works swimmingly, imo.
Nice to read your posts again, WD.
 eyeofthecamera

Joined: 4/17/2009
Msg: 98
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/2/2009 8:11:32 PM
@widowsdesire

The problem comes from the 20-30% of women who dont think like you do, and are using the fuzzy patch like its a credit card or carrot. Then again having dated women like that you realize how much the sensual aspects mean nothing to them ( and yes sensual does mean a lot to men as a definition of a healthy relationship).

Doing things for people we care about is natural. Doing something love related because it feels like a chore is not. Mtn sounds like he has run into some of the same women that I have. It does serve to turn you off the female mindset when you see it too often. Just bad luck on the draw I guess.

On a side note -- I think having some 50 and 60 year old women in playboy would probably do more for the face of humanity then that other poster thinks. Why should a woman stop celebrating her sexual appeal just because she is not some 20something cheerleader?

 ripley65

Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 99
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/2/2009 10:33:15 PM

I am just wondering about how a womans sexual drive changes after 40


My sex drive really started taking off in my mid 30's and now that im 43, its still soaring. Being comfy in my own skin, with my body, and not being afraid to speak up! I know exactly what i like and how i like it. ;)
 Mtn.lover

Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 100
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sex drive in women over 40
Posted: 9/2/2009 10:57:06 PM
eyeofthecamera, I'm glad you did the "side note" because I think it's the root of the problem. The exploitation of women sexually in magazines and cinema is probably what's responsible for their attitude today. Where you think 50 -60 year old women should be featured.....I think all that crap should be trashed. I'm probably the only living straight man that's never had those magazines in my house. I never saw the point in drooling over pictures of women that I wasn't going to be with. My wives and girls friends were always attractive enough that nothing in those magazine really put them to shame anyway. If women are exposed to the fact that many men will pay just to look at them.....what message does that send?
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