| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/16/2009 10:56:25 PM | Age differences are really irrelevant, most of the time. I dated a 35 year old man when I was 18 & my last husband was 12 years my junior. Age was not a
factor in the end of either relationship, nor ANY relationship I've been in. Maturity, being at different stages in life, yes. But most of those relationships, the
guy was the same age (+ or - 2 years!) If you are both looking for the same thing, whether it be LTR, casual dating, whatever; that is the truly determining
factor. Similar goals, common interests & shared values. Those are the really important criteria for determining compatibility. | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/17/2009 12:18:06 AM | | Doesn't matter within reason....I've fallen for someone 9 years younger and 9 years older then me...the only problem is with the really big age gaps because people could be at different stages in their life | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/17/2009 1:28:14 AM | | It can be too large.Depends on the people involved | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/17/2009 9:18:31 PM | I'm not going to give an opinion, but I do have an observation to make....if you look at the replies on here....and look at the person who made the reply....you can figure out exactly why they said what they said. In other words, for every reply there is some kind of an agenda beneath it that has nothing to do with the OP and her problem, and everything to do with the issues that people have in their own lives.
There might have been one or two honest, helpful, objective replies. | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/17/2009 9:26:38 PM | | I'm 25 and I find that most people who are 22 are too immature for me. I couldn't see being over a decade older and dating someone that young regardless of how mature they think the are. Of course you may be one of the few that actually are very mature for your age. At 22 I had already bought a house, was married and had a kid (in that order). | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/17/2009 10:53:01 PM | Attention: a mature 22 yr. old is very rare. There are very few mentally mature people that are under 35, hell it took me until age 40 to finally begin to think maturely! | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/18/2009 1:55:59 AM | Steph..... Um...yeah....he just wants to get in your pants.... unless that is what you want... that's the bottom line girlfriend..take it from a 40 year old woman.... good luck. | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/18/2009 6:31:57 AM | i dated a 39 year old married woman last Summer when I was 22. I say the older the better. Older women tend to be more caring and more passionate, not to mention kinkier and sexier.  
Also, so long as you're of legal age, I think it's fair for you to date anyone of any age, so long as that person is of the legal age as well. However, it's up to you to use your discretion in deciding who exactly you feel comfortable in dating. That's obvious.
wah-pah eek mon doo doo face!  | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/19/2009 6:25:19 AM | Oh, for heaven's sakes, all these negative posts from people who've probably no experience to back their opinions! I haven't read all the way to the end - lost interest; some of them talk like you're going to be chained to the man for life. Steph - go with your heart and gut. I dated a 40 yr old at 16, had my first serious affair with a 36 yr old at 18, and the greatest love of my life was 33 yrs to my 22. Age is just a number.
At your age, I found like-aged fellows immature and boring. I didn't care then, nor do I now, what attracted them to me - I got what I wanted from the relationships. Agree with Levi501s:
... we've seen a few posts here that prove age (numerically) doesn't equate to maturity.
How true. Dated a 51 yr old today and was bored senseless!
And as vanaheim suggests, you may have a high IQ. Mine was, but their intellectual maturity was not the sole reason I was attracted to older men. You say you've only started chatting to him; meet him and then decide. If you're as mature as you believe yourself to be, you won't need too much advice. Cheers.  | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/19/2009 7:44:53 AM | all through my adult years i've dated men 10/15 years older than me.
i never had any problems with egoists or simpletons...
the majority of my experiences were positive and fun.
if it seems the right fit,
enjoy the relationship...
i will add...
if you feel you need advice from strangers re., your lovelife...
maybe he's not the one for you. | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/19/2009 11:32:28 AM | No Steph, eleven years, at your tender age of 22 is no big deal, probably just the opposite. Most men your age ( boys ) can't find the door without bumping into it with their "business." A 33 year old is starting to mature, one can only hope, and may be better for your ego, self esteem, and your overall physical well being.
Ask him straight out what his intentions are, what he's seeking, what he expects in a female, and why he's interested in you. Is he just there to unbutton your dress or does he have a genuine interest in you as a fellow human being?
I ran the streets as a bad boy for 35 years, so I've seen and done just about everything imaginable with and to the opposite sex. Then it happened ... I grew up! Dang, and I was
having so much fun, but I hurt a lot of ladies along the trail and for that I'm truly sorry.
But I got my come-uppance - a heart broken into a million pieces which is the engine that led to my maturity.
It's OK to have your fun. Just don't do it at the expense of others. Be kind and considerate. Your time on earth is limited, and I believe someday we shall all be judged.
Happy Trails
Larry | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/19/2009 1:00:21 PM | | Go for it Steph... you don't need anyones approval especially from anyone on here. I dated a 31yr old when I was 18, he was my first real love. It didn't feel like a big age gap at the time and it still doesn't... at least not to me. | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/19/2009 1:25:16 PM | haha, who knew this would get so many responses!
thanks again for all your honest opinions.
best of luck on your hunting.
peace. | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/19/2009 1:41:29 PM | its not too big of a gap at all. the parents replying to this thread saying it's too much of a gap is cause they are protective of their own kids, nothing else.
Age is just a number, it's all about being at the same place in life and having a good time together. If youre in the workforce and live on your own (im guessing this is the case as you say very mature 22) then youre an adult with responsiblities just like him. Go for it and don't let age ruin something possibly good. | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/19/2009 4:21:20 PM | I dated a person 20 years older and another 20 year younger.
They had the same level of maturity.
I enjoyed the time I spent with them, but they didn't fit my long term needs.
We had fun. The only way to find an LTR is to date and get to know one another.
If the level of compatibility is strong then I would overlook the age difference. | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/20/2009 6:54:18 PM | Do any of you people giving her all of this advice hear just how ignorant you sound?
All of you are telling her to go for it , as if all of your "age-difference"relationship experience paid off for you!!! Every one of you explained in some form how the relationship failed, for whatever reason...yet you urge her to go for it, telling her "it could work out" when you know damn well it rarely does!!! what a f*cking joke!!I'm sure that all of you can't wait to hear her cryin the blues on here in a month or so when it's over......yes it is true.......misery loves company!! | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/21/2009 12:53:14 PM | | Honesly, I think it is too big of an age difference. I dated a man that was 55 and I am 43 and it was hard for me get pass the difference in age. | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/21/2009 1:22:22 PM | | my mom & dad were 9 years apart with my dad being the elder. met when she was 21 and he was 30. married two years later and were married for 59 years. after a certain age, age is "just a number" as the saying goes. | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/21/2009 7:25:07 PM | OP at the end of the day date whoever you want and whoever makes you feel good; age, race, gender, whatever, notwithstanding. As long as everyone is legally an adult, what business is it really of any strangers? If it works or seems to be working for you, then why ask for the sage advice of a bunch of people chatting on message boards on a (mostly) singles website (myself of course included)??  | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/21/2009 7:36:33 PM |
then why ask for the sage advice of a bunch of people chatting on message boards on a (mostly) singles website (myself of course included)??
Boredom? Nosy? Thrill seeking? | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/22/2009 10:16:21 PM | xxxDINOxxx stole the words right out of my typing finger. Whatever works for you, provided you're both consenting adults.
Internet dating is the only place I know of where people have to wear a tag with their age (or what they claim to be) on it. I certainly don't go walking around with one, nor do I ask people how old they are when I meet them.
And yes, I have had good relationships with very compatible people who were more than a decade older than or younger than me.
It's hard enough to find that combination of chemistry and compatibility as it is: why let a couple numbers worsen the odds????? | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/24/2009 2:31:52 AM | Steph,
At your age it may seem like a lot. And, it may be depending on what each of you are looking for in a relationship. For example, are you both on the same page as far as the timing of marriage and children? Also, keep in mind that as we get older a 10 or 11 year difference becomes less of a difference because we become more similar in our thinking and life stage.
Another way to look at it is that women typically date men that are older than them. Not always, but it is fairly traditional to do so. So, is a few extra years a good reason to keep looking? Or, would you have preferred to stay with him because he was a good fit as far as chemistry and compatability?
I think the biggest decision is whether you are wanting to date more people before marriage or are you ready to settle down? And, what are his feelings on the subject. Are you thoughts in agreement or do they clash?
Probably the best advice anyone can give you is to discuss this question with a few senior friends or relatives that have greater wisdom than most of us on this site.
Best wishes,
Rob | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/24/2009 4:09:50 AM | WAOFM
I think you've summed it up perfectly. You're comfortable with who you're comfortable with...some woman my age have let themselves go and are boring beyond belief, some are fantastic, fantastic intelligent and beautiful women. Some girls a lot younger than me(in 20's) are awful, unattractive and void of any personality, some are beautiful, funny with heaps of persona. Go with who you're comfortable with it's not like you're chained to the sink in this day and age...have fun and see where it goes...
Enjoy
Fisho | |
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| AGE DIFFERENCE?
Posted: 9/24/2009 5:46:41 AM | I am older than 33 and i would like a 22 year old but they would have to be a little bit prettier than steph  | |
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