| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/16/2009 9:51:51 PM | READ JOHN..the first date should be a call, the second could be a text. I never said second date..and high maintenance? Since when is asking for a little respect high maintenance. I'm not bashing texting, I just think the first date should be a call.
Learn to read and don't be so lazy. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/16/2009 9:55:13 PM | DUH..read it again..
If a man can't pick up the phone and call to ask me out THE FIRST TIME or at least to hear my voice before we go out..then he isn't really going to put up enough effort, in my opinion.
Texting is good for after you are dating or at least after the initial contact off of this sight, but I'd prefer a phone call.
So, whenever someone starts to call me someone high maintenance, it's usually someone who doesn't quite read the posts before he posts. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/16/2009 10:43:00 PM | | I just returned from a great second date with an attorney i met on here. Within 15 minutes she had text me how much she enjoyed the evening and would love to see me again. I love text messages, lol. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/17/2009 8:58:27 AM | | I don't have a problem with texting or emailing, its not always convenient to call, and like me, for most people their cellphone isn't an extra limb! But with a text or email, you'll know they will see eventually. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/17/2009 11:16:26 AM | I don't mind texts, except that I can't hold an entire conversation through them. For me, they're for quick question/response exchanges. I agree that after a date, a "I had a great time" text is a nice thing to receive :)
On the other hand, I don't like talking on the phone much any more, either; not for long conversations, anyway. I prefer in-person over texting AND calling.
And then, there's Facebook..... (grin) ... but that's only for people I already know well. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/17/2009 12:40:37 PM | | after the first date with my boyfriend, he texted me the next morning to say good morning and that he had a great time and then called me later. it was nice to get a message like that, especially since we got along so well. we still txt each other several times a day but at the end of the day he calls to chat or i call to see how his day was. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/17/2009 12:57:15 PM | Russ (soxfan64) typed...
"I almost always text after a date. In my experience most women are not comfortable rejecting someone. I think texting is a fair and balanced way for both sides to "discuss" whether or not to go out again without making the woman feel uncomfortable."
Excellent point! On my last date, the guy kept asking me all throughout the date, how did I think it was going and to tell him something good about the date. He wanted to make numerous plans for the future before we were an hour into the date. That is extremely uncomfortable for me, especially when I don't think I want to see him again. It puts me on the spot. A text would handle that. :)
I never suggest making plans for the future during a first date. If there are future plans to be made, there is plenty of time after the first date. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/17/2009 2:37:52 PM | I personally refuse to speak over the phone with anybody I haven't met in person. Call me weird. Ehh. If I decide to meet someone we decide the place and time thru email-usually quick meetings for coffee or whatever. I text to confirm we are still on and that's it. After the first meeting you can call me, or whatever. If im available I will pick up if not I won't. I don't talk to people on the phone before meeting them because they usually want to have these long in depth conversations to "get to know me" and dude I'm driving,or shopping,or SOMETHING. I save the phone calls for a person I've met and I'm interested in and won't be put off by me bluntly telling them Im too busy to chat.
Im pro text (not constant everyday all day text messages) but I prefer the excitement of that "special" guys call..It may be the age thing too because Im dating a 30yr old and he isn't much of a texter. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/17/2009 4:00:24 PM | Because they are testing the waters too chicken and afraid thinking they may be 'bothering' you......
I had a few who did that and I lost interest really fast.... I don't mind getting the odd cute text if we are both busy at work or just wanting to send a little note to add a smile to the others face but to text rather then call is just immature. If you don't have the kahoona's to call then you don't have what I'm looking for....  | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/17/2009 4:16:24 PM | I'm probably old school but I easily lose interest in a guy who texts instead of calls.. and I have tried to engage in the back and forth texting (in the name of everyone's doing it, can't beat 'em.. well join).
To me, a sexy sounding "hey babe what's up " over the phone is just So different than the same message by text. I prefer the voice while getting to know someone. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/17/2009 4:21:36 PM | I'm with Reaper ... I just see texting as yet another form of communication ... it's not bad or good, just another way to talk. I talk ALL DAY on the phone at work, so I MUCH more prefer texting or IMing compared to phone calls. A call once in a while is nice, though I do prefer the more simple way of having conversation. I'm busy and can't always have a long-drawn out phone conversation, or the desire to SPEAK to someone, so texting is the perfect option.
I see nothing wrong with it what-so-ever. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/17/2009 7:44:40 PM | | I have to say many of you have a lot of rules and conditions about dating. I hope that works for you. I like being in touch, so if a man calls, writes, texts, IM's or emails me, I'm good with that. Obviously longer, serious conversations should be in person or over the phone, but quick little messages or "Hey would you like to grab a bite after work?" is fine with me. I don't have a lot of rules and I date a lot. Wonder if there's a connection? | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/17/2009 8:46:49 PM | | Of course its easier to text. And the best part is that you don't have to hold a phone to your ear every second. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/20/2009 7:02:33 AM | I actually prefer a man text me as opposed to calling. I can't always run to the phone to answer it...but a text message is always there for me to read. Besides, if it's a cute one, I can read it a few times for a smile 
I don't know why every one thinks texting (not overly so) is so wrong? I've been told that texting during a date is rude as well...but I try to answer at least one text because I know my flatmates are going to be wondering if I'm okay with potentially creepy guy I met off the internet (it does happen!). I think people need to relax about texting a bit. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/20/2009 8:21:28 AM | | I prefer to call but I'm realistic enough to know that her life does not revolve around me so I usually text first. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/20/2009 9:25:41 AM | I don't know what the problem is.
I text. I have no problem with receiving texts. If all you want to drop on someone is a quick thought, what do you need to actually call them for? I'm busy. She may be busy. I save the phone calls for later at night when I may have a chance to actually hold a real conversation.
Why so hostile? "Texting is for the lazy." "Texting is for teenagers" and so on. .. It's a TOOL. I think most people have a problem with texting being the ONLY method of communication. Now I can see the problem with that. But not with texting in general.
If your partner is comfortable with texting and you are not, this is something that can be discussed. And mitigated. Surely you would not have such a hard line against texting that you refuse to acknowledge them? Right? From someone you are in a relationship or getting to that point with, right? I'm sure you'd ignore their emails too, right? That's lazy too, right?
Is it really this big a deal? I have a good friend that's a texting maniac. It's her way of communicating. It isn't detracting from how much I like her or anything. It's just her way.
Chill. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/20/2009 9:39:01 AM |
Of course its easier to text. And the best part is that you don't have to hold a phone to your ear every second. This point is being missed by people in this thread who believe they are the center of the universe. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/20/2009 9:47:53 AM | If I do respond at all, I say "call when you can"
If you don't mind, I am going to steal this from you Landra.
I wish I had thought of it earlier this summer when I was flirting with the Mad Texter. Would have saved me some time. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/20/2009 9:56:04 AM | I don't text. And anybody texting me already gets negative association, because I can't read the dam* letters without reading glasses and I don't carry those with me ;-)
Basically, anybody that knows me, knows not to text me. If they don't want to make the time to call me, then he's obviously not that interested in me. And if he doesn't want to take my calls, then it's obviously the same. If I want to write little notes, then I can do that by email. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/20/2009 11:57:41 AM | This point is being missed by people in this thread who believe they are the center of the universe.
^^^Umm and that bothers you? lol | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/20/2009 12:12:48 PM | | Texting is excellent for quick check ups, for small matters, and if you don't want to earn my affection. If you want me to learn to love you, you'll call and do so frequently. | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/20/2009 4:27:34 PM | | Seems like the older generation isn't too fond of texting. For the majority of the under 30 crowd such as myself, it is like a lifeline, especially for small talk. I agree with one of the previous posters though, who said "I prefer hanging out in person over calling or texting!" | |
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/20/2009 6:39:28 PM | Both.
I always text a quick thank you, had a great time after a date. Simple politeness.
Text is also good for quick "I'm on my way" messages.
Conversations, real communication, and idle chat require human to human contact that can only be accomplished by hearing the other person's voice.
Sometimes text is also good for those "I'm dreaming about you, you sexy devil" messages at 1am.
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| Texting over Calling or Both??
Posted: 9/20/2009 6:57:44 PM | Yes, it is easier to text instead of call, when a conversation is unnecessary to be had. Nobody's interrupted, and you KNOW they got the text, as opposed to "oh, I didn't check my voicemail yet..." Texts are great because it's not a "big deal" -- it's subtle, comfortable, etc.
When it comes to those early stages of pre-dating, text is a great way to do a little communication and not come off as if you're clingy. It helps the having to wait 3 days for a call... someone who abides by that won't mind sending or receiving a text a day or so later... and it's a nice way to get a feel for if there's any interest. All they have to do is text! Suddenly the "I didn't have a chance to call you, I was busy" does not fly at all.
Now, some people like to text instead of call. The text-hos can be annoying, where it's not used as a tool but a method of routine conversation. But as a tool to throw a no-risk screen pass? It's great. | |
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