| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/21/2009 3:16:48 PM | Rebounds are very common... Some experts will say as long as you don't get emotionally involved, it is good for you.
No one knows what happened within your marriage and why that has ended and whether it was painful to remain in and how long for and what you longed for and missed out on... But, you.
It's understandable that when vulnerable and perhaps even a low self esteme having not been out into the dating world for years and years that you can get sucked in by words..
I do think that this guy moving on you even though you knew him for 15 years was wrong.. Men like this look for the vulnerable. I suspect he knew your husband too.
So he got what he wanted, after you communicated and discussed the situation and then said seeya.
That is a lesson you have to learn to take time on your own when you separate from a marriage and re-gain you, get to know you, so you can see the bull from the reality...
I would agree with the above poster in as much as "don't take him back", it's going to be such a hard road for you now, 30, was in school, but now for the next 16 or so years your stuck again with changing nappies and saving for schooling and limited to dating, or having a life.
Any "real" man would stand by you and by his words ... Seems they were just that, words.
Best wishes. | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/21/2009 6:26:21 PM | I didn't see any comments from the OP about the baby's father dumping his BABY, just the girlfriend. Why is everyone so sure he's NOT willing to and going to fulfill his obligations as a parent even if they're not together as a couple?
And while it's fair enough that any kind of dumping via text is creepy, in this case I'm wondering about those classic other two sides to the story: his side, and the truth. | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/21/2009 8:31:43 PM | Sorry to hear your a** got dumped. You may as well start preparing yourself for the single mommy lifestyle.
You know I wouldn't be surprised if your bf had a very good legit reason for dumping you, hmm. | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/23/2009 1:51:10 AM | It appears that he is not going to take responsibility for his unborn child.
If he comes back to you and your unborn child, give him a chance to explain why he broke up with you. Being human, he may be scared, or is unable to support the unborn child, etc. He uses the words, '". . ., it's me."'
He probably texted you because it was easier. Facing you, he would have probably felt a lot of guilt, shame, knowing it was not the right thing to breck up with you when their was an unborn child involved.
Try to understand, and if he has no good reason for dumping you and the unborn child, then HE IS AN ***hole. | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/23/2009 2:12:25 AM | This dude or dud i should say, Is 30 omg that boy has alot of growing up to do. something like that is really immture. it sounds like thathe's really dishonest, or dose'nt want to assume responsibility of the aspects of fatherhood that would piss me of to. I'm simply placing myself in your shoes. you deserve btter than that, You need a knight in shining armor, drop that looser | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/23/2009 4:46:38 AM |
Yeah we all fcck up. I do on a daily basis.
Talk for yourself !
Op! You're not in HS however,
- got pregnant (no matter what he said/told you) with another man while you're still married.
As you said, you're 30 and already have 2 kids. You should have known better...
You should have DONE everything, anything in your power to prevent this from happening.
Sh8t like this doesn't happen to smart people! Don't kid yourself!
Bah! No sympathy! | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/23/2009 7:08:47 AM | You've already got two kids, you're still married, and pregnant buy random guy... Stop thinking about yourself and put your kids first.
You should not be on a dating website. | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/28/2009 9:25:11 PM | | yeah thats pretty awful, honestly thank your lucky stars because your life even with a child will be much better without him. He sounds like a complete loser, and if you handle it right he might have a shred of decency to be there for his future child. | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/28/2009 10:11:24 PM | | What an a$$. You look like a lovely young lady, and you're carrying his child. How a man can purposely abandon his children is beyond me. I guess some guys never grow up. Babies are fun. I miss them. I have the opposite problem myself. I was once dumped because my vasectomy couldn't be reversed and she wanted a baby. Takes all kinds, I guess. | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/29/2009 4:35:47 AM |
Try to understand, and if he has no good reason for dumping you and the unborn child, then HE IS AN ***hole.
Wildfire.......IF he has no good reason?????????? WTF???? Why are you giving him a "get out of jail free" card????? Talk about enabling irresponsibility?
Let's try that again.........He has NO good reason! There is NO reason for dumping your own child. | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/29/2009 6:50:15 AM | That is pretty weak. There's nothing inherently wrong with dumping your pregnant girlfriend. Sometimes things happen, and you have to do what you have to do. But doing it via text is the coward's way out. Something of that magnitude deserves a serious, sit-down, face to face conversation. Unless for some reason he is unable to be there in person to talk to you face to face due to work or some other extenuating circumstance. In which case he owes you a phonecall. The part you mentioned about the union and being more close to home made me wonder if that wasn't an issue in this situation.
I also think that dawn1114 is right that people are jumping to conclusions that he is going to abandon the baby simply because he is done with the relationship. I don't think there's enough evidence yet at this point to make this anything more than an assumption. | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/29/2009 6:59:32 AM | He's a jerk... fine...
But what women gets knocked up with a guy who she has no committed relationship with? Ask yourself that. No protection?? No ovulation schedule?? No responsibility? Did you accidently fall on his pecker?
Was you jerk radar not working? Tough way to find out you dated a flake, but you show all the signs of being an irresponsible flake too. Good luck to you and your kid.
You share 1/2 of the blame here. Own it. | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/29/2009 8:55:39 AM | Sorry- but the failure rate for birth control pills is 0.3%. so you're one in a million? I'm usually sympathetic but not on this one. Birth control is your responsibility- not his. he obviously didn't feel the same way. So yes, get child support. And smarten up for the next time. You're not 18, you're a grown woman and if you have a 12 yr old, sounds like this isn't a new route for you because you were 18 with the first child.
I'm 53 and there is no way I ever risked an unwanted pregnancy. Never happened- I made sure of that. You want kids- get married. Until then, get smarter. | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/29/2009 11:25:42 AM | "The guy I was with is out of town working. He broke up with me by text this morning. Said the classic "it's not you, it's me". Said he loved me but just didn't want to be with me anymore. What kind of ass dumps his pregnant girlfriend by text? We aren't in high school anymore, we're 30 and expecting a child together for Christ's sake!"
I would say the gentleman that dumped the OP is a genius and should be rewarded for his heroic act...LOL!!! What does it matter the method he used to do the dumping.. Being dumped is not fun no matter the way in which it is done.. Oh and I would drop the together part and because obviously you two are not together...anymore.. You know they have this things called birth control devices and both who tango are responsible.. None of this is his fault or her fault, because then, that would really be high school-ish.. Oh well, glad to see where my tax dollars are going these days... Great this is just awesome!!  | |
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| pregnant and dumped by text
Posted: 9/29/2009 11:42:15 AM | Was on the pill at the time anyway, and no accidently missed pills. They were taken right, never fail me in that last nine year, and then they did.
That's what they all say. - it's the oldest excuse in the book.
Yes, that is exactly what they all say.
So why did you decide to have the child? Were the two of you planning to get married after your divorce was final? | |
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