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 Rossjackson1985
Joined: 4/7/2009
Msg: 101
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?Page 5 of 22    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22)
spanking is not beating your child.. that is making a mountain out of a mole hill.. no matter how you put it.
 Rossjackson1985
Joined: 4/7/2009
Msg: 102
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 8:52:15 AM
beating is abuse, spanking is not. You spank your child.. LIGHTLY.. not to leave a mark and not to hurt, just enough for them to know the boundaries.

Also, Adults do have adequate punishment.. but it is in a mature style.. prison for example, being fired, suspended, fined.. what ever.

you reasoning is flawed, out of context and illogical.
 Rossjackson1985
Joined: 4/7/2009
Msg: 103
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 9:37:54 AM
oh dear.. another follower of the prophet of google and wikipedia..please... come back when you can form your own opinion and not that of a 12 yr old.
 Rossjackson1985
Joined: 4/7/2009
Msg: 104
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 9:52:03 AM
spanking is not beating..how are you not getting this?! lol
 TAKEN fab-mom
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 105
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 10:25:14 AM
I haven't posted on this yet. I did read the article though and it even states that this study is far from being able to be accurate because there is NO way to have a controlled study. They would have to take one group of kids scheduled for spankings and another set that did not receive them. Impossible to get an accurate statistic.

My view on my spankings growing up...I NEVER remember my parents spanking out of anger. I remember being sat down and talked to and explained why i was getting the spanking. i appreciate and learned from every one of them. And DESERVED every one of them.

With my daughter...I have found that the only time I spank is out of frustration, exhaustion, fear or anger. I would LOVE to say that I never have spanked or smacked a leg or hand but unfortunately I have. Although not often I spend days disappointed with myself and feeling like the worst mommy in the world. So no...I do not believe spankings are a healthy form of discipline. I find when i talk to my daughter she will quickly apologize and correct her behavior. Spankings only make it worse. Just like yelling. Unnecessary and uncalled for. But we are human and make mistakes.
 Rossjackson1985
Joined: 4/7/2009
Msg: 106
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 10:29:18 AM
depends how you utilise the spankings..
 TAKEN fab-mom
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 107
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 10:31:07 AM
Oh! And I love how last week my daughter got a yellow star from daycare for hitting someone in the head with a baby doll and some of my friends immediately went to "looks like someone needs a spanking". How exactly is hitting a child going to teach them to NOT hit?!?!
 futureshock
Joined: 5/8/2009
Msg: 108
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 10:32:27 AM
For a better understanding on how and what goes into a study such as the one on spanking, and to be able to make a more educated refutation of this and other studies with which you disagree,
please take a moment and view this:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zcavPAFiG14
 TAKEN fab-mom
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 109
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 10:34:06 AM

depends how you utilise the spankings..


What do you mean?

I THINK you are talking about the two forms of spankings I discussed in my post. And yes, I think in some circumstances spankings might be "effective" (such as in my case) but I also think there are better, less physical forms of discipline.
 TAKEN fab-mom
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 110
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 10:35:22 AM
I know how the scientific method works future. thank you very much. But I also know it is flawed!
 Rossjackson1985
Joined: 4/7/2009
Msg: 111
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 10:46:45 AM
see, most of the people here automatically think if you spank your child that you are some kind of abusing arrgessive child beater..or what ever.. dumb arses.. anyway.. I spank my nephew and cousins and i will even spank my daughter when she is older.. not all the time only when it is justified.. i.e. they broke something on purpose.. they did something to somebody else.. just generally the really bad things. Guess what? they never do that act again after they are spanked. We have tried to talk to them in the past, they'll say they won't do it again.. but you you can't take a childs word as they say one thing and do the exact opposite.
 Spagett!
Joined: 8/9/2009
Msg: 112
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 11:41:59 AM

they never do that act again after they are spanked. We have tried to talk to them in the past, they'll say they won't do it again.. but you you can't take a childs word as they say one thing and do the exact opposite.

That is why spanking WORKS.

I think of it like fire; the first time a person touches fire it "spanks" them with a burn. The person thinks: "Day-um! That shizzle hurts!" More often than not, something is learned. "Don't touch fire!"

Now, if the fire had just told that person: "Hey pal, you better not touch me I am hot!" Then when the person touched fire, fire felt bad and didn't want to abuse so: "Hey pal! I thought I told you not to touch me! Go to your room!" (Which lesson taught, fire is hot better? PERSONAL PREFERENCE, that's which lesson.)
 TAKEN fab-mom
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 113
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 12:11:34 PM
I prefer shock therapy by far
 itsallinthesoul
Joined: 6/26/2009
Msg: 114
Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 12:23:05 PM

NOOOOOOO. Just talk to him like an adult.


Strangely enough that is what has always worked best with my children.....

I do believe fabmom was yanking our collective chain...I hope!

I can think of a few people that might benefit from shock therapy though....
 TAKEN fab-mom
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 115
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 12:38:08 PM
Lol! YES!! I swear I was kidding.
 Consigliori
Joined: 1/7/2008
Msg: 116
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 3:41:02 PM

Lol! YES!! I swear I was kidding.


I thought you were serious and it sounded like such a good idea that I tried it on a couple of the kids this afternoon. Man ... it's the best thing since the closet! My only beef is that I had to lug the car battery around when I was chasing them.
 itsallinthesoul
Joined: 6/26/2009
Msg: 117
Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 5:59:33 PM

I thought you were serious and it sounded like such a good idea that I tried it on a couple of the kids this afternoon. Man ... it's the best thing since the closet! My only beef is that I had to lug the car battery around when I was chasing them.


I hope they were your kids you were chasing around......

On a sidenote, I used to spend a lot of time in my closet growing up.....I preferred it because it was the only safe place at times to be in our house. As long as I had a light and a book, I was a happy girl in my closet. No, my parents didn't make me go there, I chose it to hide out and be under their radar....
 singlesuperdad
Joined: 8/26/2009
Msg: 118
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 6:12:01 PM
closets made good forts, no building involved, lol
 futureshock
Joined: 5/8/2009
Msg: 119
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 6:57:44 PM

I know how the scientific method works future. thank you very much. But I also know it is flawed!


taken fab-mom , I was not directing my post at you in any way, shape or form.

taken fab-mom , How is the scientific method flawed, and what are some ways to improve it?
 ohwhynot46
Joined: 6/28/2009
Msg: 120
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 9:48:54 PM
[ We have tried to talk to them in the past, they'll say they won't do it again.. but you you can't take a childs word as they say one thing and do the exact opposite.]

I have to tell you, I don't think a quick swat is abuse at all, but the quote attributed to you speaks volumes about those who believe that spanking is "effective". Have you ever told your child that you love them & would never do anything to hurt them? If so, then YOU are the reason that your child says one thing & does the opposite; children learn proper behavior by modeling, not physical control. You see, as far as I am concerned (and have seen) spanking does not teach a thing; it hurts, humiliates and makes the child feel powerless. At the very least, spanking does not TEACH proper behavior, spanking appeases the parent & controls behavior, but not long term. Unless of course, one believes that it is proper to hit someone who annoys you or doesn't do what you say, but I'd be surprised if this is what you intend to teach your children. Such methods of "teaching" another adult are termed assault! I don't know of anyone who has actually learned how to behave from being hit. They may learn how NOT to behave, in front of you, at least, but that's about it.

To the poster who stated that spanking "works", well, if you are attempting to raise a violent criminal, it certainly does. As much as I am aware that statistics are used to further both sides of an argument, they are also compilations of data. The data is that nearly ALL those convicted of violent crimes were spanked. True, they may were most likely beaten rather than "spanked" , but for the kids, let's face it, it's relative. If you are hit, you are taught to hit, period. The young child smacked with a hand knows no different than the one beaten with a belt. I don't know if you have kids or not, but if you think physical punishment "works" I question your definition of "works". I will state again that, for short term control, it does work, but as far as discipline or teaching a child proper behavior, it is useless.
 1kindMan4U
Joined: 5/23/2007
Msg: 121
Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 10:08:11 PM
Yeah.. go whale away on the kid.. It'll teach em..

I think that kids should be spanked for dumping in their diaper.. that'll teach em

Then they should be whacked for shoving their baby food off the tray.. yeah teach em

Then they should be whacked for NOT being potty trained when YOU want it.. yeah

Then they should be beaten for not making their bed fast enough.. damn zygotes

I know.. scar them for NOT having a child star agent so I can be paid for being a stagemom and make a cushy living

Or.. Let's make drowning the little b tards for existing.. yeah.. that's a solution.


sheeesh.. you people

Virtually EVERY felon was spanked. I mean almost ALL. Whack a mole, make a felon
 Spagett!
Joined: 8/9/2009
Msg: 122
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 10:20:56 PM

Virtually EVERY felon was spanked. I mean almost ALL. Whack a mole, make a felon

Really? So are you saying every person spanked is going to be a felon?

If not, then what does that point matter?

Correlation does not equal causation.
 ohwhynot46
Joined: 6/28/2009
Msg: 123
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 10:31:21 PM
Spagetti, I am surprised at you, as you have displayed far too much intelligence to utter (type) such a ridiculous statement. You know better! Do you think that if I say that all men wearing red pants are felons, then all felons wear red pants? Please don't insult my intelligence! You know very well that is not my point.

My response was clearly to the notion that spanking works. If all felons were spanked, it obviously didn't work for them, as far as behavior modification, or as a tool in teaching proper behavior. Is that clearer?
 Rossjackson1985
Joined: 4/7/2009
Msg: 124
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 10:56:41 PM
i like it how "ohwhynot" automatically assumes that if i spank a child that i don't love them nor do i talk to them..what an ignorant ass-hat. I say this over and over AND over again.. my entire family including extended family.. all the members of the family that live in Australia, England and Scotland.. they were ALL spanked... and NONE of them had any kind of attitude problem.. they are ALL successfull and ALL intelligent and NONE of them are criminals.. and i having a bloody big family :)

puts those falsified statistics to shame really.
 Spagett!
Joined: 8/9/2009
Msg: 125
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Does this change your mind about spanking your child?
Posted: 9/30/2009 10:57:20 PM
I was responding to the poster under you, but I think your opinion still applies...

As much as I am aware that statistics are used to further both sides of an argument, they are also compilations of data. The data is that nearly ALL those convicted of violent crimes were spanked. True, they may were most likely beaten rather than "spanked" , but for the kids, let's face it, it's relative.

It is NOT relative. Ask anyone that has been beaten and spanked. To compare the two is a little stretchy IMO.

Now, the correlation equals causation part. I am not saying that the coincidence isn't there (assuming there is data, I have not looked), but it still doesn't make it the cause. I know of several parents that refuse to lay a hand on their child because they were spanked. I don't know the true numbers of course, so this is just my opinion.



If you are hit, you are taught to hit, period.

I know of several parents that refuse to lay a hand on their child because they were spanked.

Remember, I am not saying one is better than the other. I am saying it is up to the parents to decide which to use. (Personal Preference)
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