| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 2:39:51 AM | Awee.. Well I did but that's only cause he posted that after I posted my reply and I haven't viewed since.
It's important that you bought that up... Let's hope people READ it.
I don't have much to add, you've said it all nappykat... and there's nothing wrong with not being able to have children either, alot of ladies that have children would welcome a man who didn't want anymore, even if that be that he can't have them...
Including sexually, no birth control which we hate, mostly... No fear of pregnancy... and still the same love, if not probably more for her and her children. | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 5:37:20 AM | | you know big ben... immature men are looking for one night stands. you know, the ones that are afraid of commitment. I wouldn't say that it's just the childless men... it's even the men that DO have children that are immature. but i agree with some people on here, it depends on the person. being with someone, it takes 2. it's a team effort. yea, help with the bills might be nice, but it depends on the right person. im a single mom and i take care of my own responsibilities. i go to work full time and support my daughter. and honestly, i prefer it that way... i have too much pride and am too independent to be a stay at home mom and be taken care of. thats just my opinion. | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 7:31:50 AM |
Yes. keyword is MOST. Here's the proof.. ask them if they are willing to sign a prenup. Their answer will tell you if they seek LOVE or money.
It's really that simple.
Oh 1kindman4u, if only people were that simple. I would not sign a prenup agreement and it has nothing to do with wanting to grab at his money or protect mine. A prenup is like a plan for the end of a relationship....if a man thinks he needs to protect against me taking his assets when we split up or I need to do it, then we are not in the right "frame of mind" to make a "life-long" committment. I do not take the committment of marriage lightly and when I chose to marry, it will be for life...the ONLY reason I would ever end a marriage would be if HE broke the contract by abusing me or cheating on me. Hell may have no fury like a woman scorned, but I am still not the "type" of person to take someone for everything they have out of vengeance. I would expect a split of the "marital assets", nothing more and no alimony. Those are my values and if he doesn't know me well enough to know that about me, he should not be marrying me to begin with...... | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 8:39:51 AM |
Prenups should be issued with every marraige licence. Commitment these days has the same shelf life as mcdonalds french fries.
We could make it illegal to co-habit or marry.........
I don't do band-aid solutions....shouldn't we as a society be trying to fix the real problem instead of applying band-aids to a serious problem (that being the break-down of the family unit?). | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 8:40:51 AM |
Oh 1kindman4u, if only people were that simple. I would not sign a prenup agreement and it has nothing to do with wanting to grab at his money or protect mine. A prenup is like a plan for the end of a relationship....if a man thinks he needs to protect against me taking his assets when we split up or I need to do it, then we are not in the right "frame of mind" to make a "life-long" committment. I do not take the committment of marriage lightly and when I chose to marry, it will be for life...the ONLY reason I would ever end a marriage would be if HE broke the contract by abusing me or cheating on me. Hell may have no fury like a woman scorned, but I am still not the "type" of person to take someone for everything they have out of vengeance. I would expect a split of the "marital assets", nothing more and no alimony. Those are my values and if he doesn't know me well enough to know that about me, he should not be marrying me to begin with......
Prenups and trusts are very useful, specially in situations where one party is bringing a child from another relationship, and they plan on having a child between themselves. Here is an example:
Two people meet, one has a child from a previous relationship and the two people plan to have a child between them.
The party with the most assets who also does not have a child yet draws up a prenup. The purpose of this is to protect any future children of this person
The couple have a child.
A trust is drawn up protecting the biological child of the person with the assets. The purpose of this is, without a trust, if the person with assets dies, he/she can not be certain that his or her assets will go to his or her child instead of the step child. With a trust, they can be sure the assets will go to their child.
The above scenario would not be necessary in a marriage where the child from a previous relationship was adopted by the new spouse. | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 8:55:40 AM | My now husband and I discussed a prenup. But it was him that was going to sign. I had all the assets (and the child!) In the end I figured if I was willing to marry this man then full trust was needed. We took the extra time and effort and added both our names to the deed of the house and any titles we had to vehicles. (His racing bike) Now everything is "ours".
I was not looking for someone to support me financially and neither was he. We just wanted someone to be supporting period. | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 10:29:39 AM | I am so happy that YOU arent the "TYPE" of woman who would take a man "for all he's got" out of vengeance. Why cant/wont you put that in writing?
If it can be SPOKEN, it can be WRITTEN.
Like it's also been said, "A broken clock is RIGHT, twice a day" It's just WRONG the other 1338 minutes of the day. So in doing the math ratio here, that means that a man's chances of NOT being screwed over by an upside down legal system is ONE tenth of ONE percent on the CHANCE he meets YOU or your think-alike TWIN.
The OTHER 1338 women out there that make up the 99.8611 percent of the rest of the female population WILL screw him over. You want men to take THAT chance?
Whatever else marriage MAY be to each party, it IS a LEGAL PARTNERSHIP CONTRACT that you have to SUE to end. You are contracted with your state of residence to agree to how to live a life together.
Remember.. ALL marriages supposedly BEGIN with that trust, love, commitment you speak of. Only 15% last longer than 15 years(according to divorce statistics). The 2nd marriage divorce rate is in the high 90th percentile.
This means that close to 90% of men who marry are getting screwed sooner or later.
Planning for a "Never-gonna-happen-possibility" is NOT planning on ending it. In fact, it would sure provide a DIS-incentive to end it so quickly if there were "penalties for early withdrawal from the marriage" in place.
It's nice to see head-in-the-clouds-deny-reality thinking these days. | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 10:45:17 AM | 1kind man , these marrage stats are what I was tryin g to get across to an anti-single parent. His perfect marriage and baby on the way may not be as perfect and forever as he thinks and he could very well be a single parent hiself soon and then what? are all his theories going to change?
although I do wish him the best!! for his whole families sake!! | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 10:48:38 AM | SSD.. ALL the women who go after their soon-to-be-ex's in court were ALSO "so in love" when they married.
Obviously the divorced ones WERENT.
Edit:Oh Nappy.. go re-read the entire thread.
YOU said he MIGHT be sterile, then the OP responded to you by quoting you.
At NO TIME did he say.. "I'M STERILE" He just quoted your MIGHT BE comment.
Taking that into consideration, it would SEEM all the comments still stand. I didnt do a proof-reading though and my statement here does NOT imply that I am agreeing with ANY other poster on here.. except SSD | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 10:51:43 AM | SSD.. ALL the women who go after their soon-to-be-ex's in court were ALSO "so in love" when they married.
I wasn't "in love" or married. I was having sex with someone I could tolerate long enough for the time it took to do that. I'm sure most single parents will say that they were "in a relationship" or whatever but I think there are a lot more "one night stand" babies out there then are brought to light.
So no, not ALL the women, as you put it were. | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 11:34:09 AM | Wow apparently not-so-fab mom.. A self-admission of yours I'm not sure anyone would want to put out there..
SSD and I were talking about the thread in the original post concerning MARRIAGE and PRENUPS. (in case you dont know, a prenup is a written CONTRACT made.. BEFORE a marriage happens) THAT was the foundation of my comment.
So on to my curiosity about your posting
You were having sex with someone you could barely tolerate? For what.. his DNA?
You DIDNT use protection? You know.. A depo shot coupled with an IUD, covered by a diaphram covered in spermicidal jelly backed up by vaginal foam AND his condom?
Then you PURPOSELY made a child under those circumstances?
And KEPT said fertilized egg?
It seems, from your post that you tricked this guy-you-eventually-sued-in-court-for SUPPORT into becoming an annuity for YOUR SELFISH DREAMS/desires to mother a child?
Or did I totally misinterpret your post? Just lookin for some clarity here | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 12:11:40 PM | You totally misinterpreted my posts.
as far as "tricking" that's right....I tricked him into falling into my vagina.
I had no desire to become a mother at all.
We had dated briefly and yes, had unprotected sex ( come on now! If I said we were using protection you would just say I was lying!) but yeah, we weren't.
He knew very much I was against abortion because we had discussed this as the reason I was in the process of getting my tubes tied.
And I had broke up with him prior to finding out that I was pregnant because his habits had become untolerable. That is what I meant by "barley tolerate".
As far as child support. I gave him a choice just like I had. He could be a part of his childs life. Be a father. And have no financial obligations. Or he could pay child support. He chose the latter. I no longer receive child support from him though since the adoption has been finalized.
As far as a self-admission others might not admit it but that is their problem. I have and never will see anything wrong with sex between two consenting adults.
How many kids do you have?
How could you breed with someone who was so obviously not right for you?
You didn't use protection? | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 12:31:11 PM | Heard a good one lately that would slow the tide of divorce.
The person asking fot the divorce would have to throw a reverse wedding and pay for the whole thing. It would include having to reinvite everyone that was there for the first one and a black dress or white tux.
Book the same church, caterer, dj the whole shebang. At the ceremony they would have to explain to the crowd the resons they want a divorce and apologize for wasting their time twice. Also they would have to buy each guest a gift of equal value to the one they gave at the wedding or cash. Plus a free bar at the reception.
Seeing as how it is women who tend to ask more often, they may cut back on the excess the first time around and opt for a quickie in vegas or city hall. | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 12:32:35 PM |
as far as "tricking" that's right....I tricked him into falling into my vagina.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA thank you! I needed that laugh!
As far as a self-admission others might not admit it but that is their problem. I have and never will see anything wrong with sex between two consenting adults.
I agree, theres nothing wrong with sex between consenting adults.
How many kids do you have?
How could you breed with someone who was so obviously not right for you?
You didn't use protection?
I was wondering that myself. | |
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| Are most single moms looking for a guy to care for them financially?
Posted: 10/1/2009 12:34:19 PM | | I tried to convince hubby to go to the court house....we ended up in Jamaica! lol. Where do you get that is is usually the woman that asks? Is that opinion or do you have something to back that up. Just curious. And do you feel the same if the woman is asking because the man is a wh*re who doesn't mind being married and sleeping with other women? | |
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His attitude is very unattractive.
