| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/16/2006 12:51:35 PM | | how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop ? same thing ? the world may never know but who's complaining ? | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/16/2006 3:03:15 PM | Its about the manual dexterity for me. Anybody that can do one thing with one hand....something else with the other....thats sexy. But, hey..I also think that watching a man drive a stick shift is hot. So what do I know? | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/21/2006 12:05:13 PM |
I was never attracted to the " band " type of guy...sorry, but everytime I see girls with musicians, the musicians are broke as hell and the girl ends up closing her savings acct bc of him. I don't see the big deal.
Especially when you consider that very few musicians or anyone who works in the arts for that matter,can reach a level of success where they can be comfortable with music alone.I was listening the other day to a radio show where a call in guest was lamenting the fact that her boyfriend was always broke.He was in his 30's and still living for his "dream" when he would be making records and being famous.The DJ's were saying that if he was in his 30's,it was a safe bet that he would be playing bars the rest of his life.
Even the famous ones,if you read of their exploits,it makes me wonder what the big deal is and why a woman who probably could have any other guy would flock to them.But then we aren't dealing with logic are we? | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/21/2006 12:12:44 PM | It is not my personal experience that being a musician is a selling point. Most women I've met just find it 'quaint'. And given where I live, long hair just generally isn't cool around here, or it stereotypes you automatically as some drug user/hippie/whatever.
Seriously, of all the women I have dated in the past, only one of them went for the fact that I was a musician, and it wasn't one of my original selling points with her, but rather something that she got into later on.
So you actually fall back (so to speak) on musicians, OP? I've sincerely never heard of that. But it kind of fits my motif lately...that all the good ones live everywhere BUT in my hometown. | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/21/2006 12:15:10 PM | I've sung in bands and cabarets and clubs and pubs here in NYC. I think the attraction is part that you're talented, part that you have the guts to go on stage and perform, and that makes you seem interesting as well. People in this country, in general, are awed by performers. I also do some acting, and it's the same phenomena, even more so.
I'll walk into a place, and no one pretty much will pay attention to me. Yet, I'll go up and sing just one song, and boom! everything changes. | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/21/2006 12:21:29 PM | | Oh come on people it's because we are just so cocky and are used to dealing with almost every situation. When you've been everywhere and done almost everything it's just expected that you've learned something. I just got my band back together and I've never felt more at home than when when I'm playing. | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/21/2006 12:22:19 PM | I know women who will date anyone who's in a band no matter how much of a male slut he is, what he looks like, if he's got a job, if he does drugs...there are some true blue groupies out there. Then again, I have seen women try to sleep with bartenders or bouncers too...not sure what the whole staff conquest thing is about, I guess they feel like they are getting attention? From a local guy who delivers pizza on his free nights? Eh, whatever...strange. I've never been the groupie type. I have been in radio and worked with actual celebrities and they really are just people.
I like some guys in bands; the older ones (30s or so) that work full time and play on weekends for fun, and don't need or are not trying to be famous, etc - the younger guys are either so young they are still fascinated by the scene and the women and partying or do nothing else but book and practice (as they should be) and don't really have time for girlfriends.
Most of the guys I'd talk to in that scene are either past that groupie thing, or were never about that....NOT ALL....but some. Of course the ability to sing and or play music is nice, as I am a fan of music, and the long hair is a nice bonus. The biggie for me is that they are in the same industry as me, so they understand me working in clubs till 2 or 3 am and don't harass me about talking to drunk men all night which is just part of my job. The bar and club scene is just like breathing to me since I've been in it 20 years, and there are people in other types of jobs who just don't really get that.
It takes someone who gets the scene to understand you being in it. And of course there is mutual support, meaning I am usually out with them on nights they are playing, or vice versa. | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/21/2006 7:06:04 PM | | I am a musician who has been in a band with 5 guys. All had girlfriends or wives and none of them were interested in the ladies in the bars. Maybe looked alot they can't help it!! I have had relationships with musicians. I don't think they fool around anymore than the average Joe. What get me ladies, is women who go after musicians, want relationships with them and then complain when the musician has to gig regularly or go out of town. For some reason the music is the attraction but once you have them, you want the 9 to 5 guy who stays at home. And I get the same thing..cool your a musician but the idea of me actually having a gig bugs some guys..go figure.. | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/22/2006 12:36:49 AM | Well, back in the 1800's when I used to party  I was always drawn to a member of the band. It was usually the drummer, but the lead singer had eyes for me!  I really don't know the reason except maybe it was that soooo many women were wanting their attention and they were paying attention to you?? Maybe an ego thing? All I know is a drummer can still ruffle my sagging tail feathers!!   | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/22/2006 1:53:40 AM | "I don't think they fool around anymore than the average Joe."
Thank you Blondie....I could probably write a book on all the inclandestine rendevous' I would witness from the stage during my 30 years of playing..... There've been more naked butts plopped down on Xerox machines in offices all over the world to 'make some copies' than supposed 'slut' musicians......But I'm quite sure that would never include anybody from THIS site......heavens NO....
My biggest mistake was actually MARRYING the groupie instead of just DOING her.....
"What get me ladies, is women who go after musicians, want relationships with them and then complain when the musician has to gig regularly or go out of town. For some reason the music is the attraction but once you have them, you want the 9 to 5 guy who stays at home."
And thank you again Blondie.....
Yeah.....it's not just the music that's the attraction. It's the attraction to the people they get introduced to and the excitement as a result of being with the musician.
Funny how my income as a "30 year old stuck playing in bars for the rest of my life" was always GREATER than any of the women's incomes I ever dated or married, or even greater than most of the people who came to be entertained, and I never had to resort to moonlighting as an insurance salesman. But for some strange reason, the one who was attracted to the lifestyle and the money brought in was actually often the insecure and jealous one who never quite understood the concept that it is a "JOB".
Why did this thread suddenly re-energize after a year anyway?? It's such an old thread.... | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/22/2006 2:49:29 AM | [I've sung in bands and cabarets and clubs and pubs here in NYC. I think the attraction is part that you're talented, part that you have the guts to go on stage and perform, and that makes you seem interesting as well. People in this country, in general, are awed by performers. I also do some acting, and it's the same phenomena, even more so.
I'll walk into a place, and no one pretty much will pay attention to me. Yet, I'll go up and sing just one song, and boom! everything changes.]
It may not be that women are attracted to the musician type, but the idea of romance.
I know if a man sang to me or dedicated a song to me, I would find that very romantic. It shows that he has a tender side.
I am very attracted to a man that is strong and and a man in every sense of the word, but a man that isn't afraid to show his heart melts me like butter!  | |
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ousu
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Joined: 6/2/2005
Msg: 169 | |
| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/22/2006 3:29:01 AM | Nota bene, this all is generalizing.
Msg: 162
"AND WOMEN LIKE CONFIDENCE!!!"
I am not sure if there are any published research about this, but those experiments (combined with experiences) I know, are talking against this confidence. Probably many performance artists give impression (and have it) when performing (the way person expresses his needs, face the environment) but their civilian personality is quite the opposite: introvert, shyer, more insecure (innerpersonal emotional needs). So, the change happens basically when they step “on the stage”, you could say that their internal revolving stage spins over. But you need to deal with the person outside of the stage ;)
For confidence… hmmmm, not sure but I would make a bet for an honestly extrovert salesperson.
Msg: 164
"maybe it was that soooo many women were wanting their attention and they were paying attention to you?? Maybe an ego thing?"
Yes, women are good in contending for attention, generally. Plus getting together with an artist will not stop the other women doing it. When you add to this the fact that people forget easily that a person in public has also his private life, and that not all people are respecting this fact. They become sort of public property which can be hard to stand for the family.
Msg:165
"it is a "JOB"
Exactly.
Further more, IMO, if someone wants to have “normal” family life and has strong need to get continuous attention, s/he might be wise if avoiding artists and scientists :p | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/22/2006 4:19:33 AM |
I don't think they fool around anymore than the average Joe.
I agree. Most of them are actually doing something they are good at, and that they love, as opposed to men who end up in jobs to pay bills they really don't like and have no creative outlet. Just because there are more women around doesn't change a man's personality, and a lot of them are content in relationships because they get to see the flip side of it while working and they can make an educated comparison. Muscians who cheat would have cheated anyway if they weren't musicians. It's just the personality they have.
What gets me ladies, is women who go after musicians, want relationships with them and then complain when the musician has to gig regularly or go out of town. For some reason the music is the attraction but once you have them, you want the 9 to 5 guy who stays at home.
OMG exactly, what is that about? My ex is a sound guy so I know a ton of local musicians, and quite a few of them married women they met while working, and those same women wouldn't let them play out once they got married. Huh?? Talk about bait and switch - totally not fair. If you can't accept a guy's life when you date him, then don't date him. This business of marrying him and then making him give everything up is just insane.
I am not sure if there are any published research about this, but those experiments (combined with experiences) I know, are talking against this confidence. Probably many performance artists give impression (and have it) when performing (the way person expresses his needs, face the environment) but their civilian personality is quite the opposite: introvert, shyer, more insecure (innerpersonal emotional needs). So, the change happens basically when they step “on the stage”, you could say that their internal revolving stage spins over. But you need to deal with the person outside of the stage ;)
For confidence… hmmmm, not sure but I would make a bet for an honestly extrovert salesperson.
Very true. A lot of the guys I know are totally quiet and shy when offstage, and just like many radio personalities I know, they develop almost an alter ego. Once you have to perform as part of a job, you almost need to be the opposite when you're not working. | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/22/2006 5:34:48 AM | I didn't read all 7 pages...but the simple answer is passion. A musician has already demonstrated passion & perserverence (2 things needed to play well)....add to that the 'fame' factor of being up on stage and you get a very attractive package for many women.
Interestingly enough, as a man it gives you insight into what it must be like for attractive women. People hitting on you just for a 'physical' attraction, not really wanting to know the real you, assuming you are a certain way because of your looks, etc. | |
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| Why are women attracted to musicians?
Posted: 11/22/2006 11:51:30 PM | | in the animal world...mates are often attratced by physical presentation or prowess..the ability to make music is one of those attractants...u can be butt ugly but if you got rhythm or musicality than u are in! no pun intended | |
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