One poster said – early on in a relationship he tends to try to impress - isn't totally honest and after a while - ‘i start to resent the fact that i can't really be myself and things go downhill from there.'
I've often heard the expression 'she makes me a better man' - isn't that a good thing? Why would you resent being the person they want? But it definitely proves the point, you have to be honest, even with yourself.
I think he was explaining how important it is, from the very beginning in a relationship, to be true to yourself. He said he was trying to "impress"...meaning he was sacrificing who he truly was...for the sake of the new relationship.
He doesn't say how he was doing that..maybe doing the things she enjoyed and he really didn't or not speaking up on topics that were important to him so he wouldn't rock the boat. But all the same, he was denying himself from being himself around the new relationship..After awhile that can start becoming very uncomfortable. After he realized what he had done the resentment set in. Resentment more probably towards himself because he didn't speak up earlier in the relationship. So the other person in the relationship thought she was getting a certain person...but not really...because he realized that is not who he was...he had not taken the time to share who he really was. Or maybe resentment set in on her part because he finally did try to express who he was and she resented him. He didn't explain where the resentment was coming from.
I think this is one tool that is important. Be true to yourself as you develop the relationship.
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