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| | That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Page 19 of 23 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23) | some curious whinges projected here from a few increasingly bitter sounding aged men who obviously aren't "getting any"...
ww...you're living in the past. there were more marriages at a younger age, one reason being women unfortunately did not have the opportunities in the work force that exist now. in the corporate world it is still an uneven playing field, but of course a man with your "expertise" would know this.
as for your statement "most men, most women, who marry, stay married" maybe you should take a peek at the latest statistics on marriage and divorce in your country. there are differing stats., for each age groups.
any man who can't afford to wine and dine a lady shouldn't ask her out. dates don't always end happily...so what? when i go to dinner with a man i'm more interested in having a fun evening than worrying about who's going to pick up the tab. whether we're in a restaurant or eating fish and chips by the beach i wouldn't be with that man if i thought he was a penny pinching miser...no matter how much sex appeal he radiated. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/5/2010 6:45:04 PM |
as for your statement "most men, most women, who marry, stay married" maybe you should take a peek at the latest statistics on marriage and divorce in your country.
It is around 41% and that is down from a high of around 43%......Never has the divorce rate in the US been at much less above 50%.
So his statement of most stay married is correct.
any man who can't afford to wine and dine a lady shouldn't ask her out. dates don't always end happily...so what? when i go to dinner with a man i'm more interested in having a fun evening than worrying about who's going to pick up the tab. whether we're in a restaurant or eating fish and chips by the beach i wouldn't be with that man if i thought he was a penny pinching miser...no matter how much sex appeal he radiated.
I agree I have had dates at a swanky restaurant that dived and had ones at the coffee shop that took off. Man or woman can depend on sex appeal.....If their is no chemistry it doesn't matter. Which is why I do coffee meets instead of spending a mint on meeting a lady I don't care to be with. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/5/2010 7:10:56 PM |
as for your statement "most men, most women, who marry, stay married" maybe you should take a peek at the latest statistics on marriage and divorce in your country.
Actually, for my country (the Good Ole US of A), fewer people divorce now than 20 or 30 years ago.
Even in the 1970's (when "no fault" divorce spread across the US of A) and 1980's, most people who were married, stayed married. ONLY by including the (higher) divorce rate of 2nd marriages and the (higher yet) divorce rate of 3rd marriages did the total divorce rate of ALL marriages approach one in two.
Today, in "my" country (the Good Ole US of A), an even larger percentage of those who marry, stay married.
any man who can't afford to wine and dine a lady shouldn't ask her out.
I am speechless.
i wouldn't be with that man if i thought he was a penny pinching miser...no matter how much sex appeal he radiated
"Sex appeal" is, by definition, the projection of the ability to sire (or birth) children more likely to survive to adulthood. Are you saying that spending beaucoup bux is more important to you than having children who survive?
Ahhhhh ... well ... okay ... I guess. But, what has anyone's belief that spending oddles of money "on a date" is a given got to do with "sex appeal"? I once saw a then teenage friend of my brother stop cold twenty cashiers -- no keying whatsoever --in a row at Target as he walked by. Do you think that any of those young cashiers knew his father was rich? | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/5/2010 7:30:34 PM | ^oh pleeeeeze!...
...any many who can't afford to wine and dine a lady shouldn't ask her out FOR A MEAL.
to me sex appeal is "by definition the projection of the ability to" ensure a mutually satisfying sexual union.
"are you saying that" you have no sex appeal?... | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/5/2010 7:38:45 PM |
^^^ Please take your choice of politics offline. It has not a thing to do with dating/mating as is this site, or the sex appeal of dating/mating as is this thread.
I was initially responding to someone who made a statement. You might ask her to take her opinions offline, if you so wish. But of course, you might have liked her 'politics'.
Alternatively, you might wish to take your eyes off-line, if forums posts are not to your liking. You'll avoid popping a vein that way.
It's called discussion, and my post is relevant and on-topic, if you read to the end. It has everything to do with dating/mating (and responding to the thoughts of other forum posters.)
I don't hate women any more than I hate men - I find both sexes quite stupid the majority of the time. In the end, it says more about you as a person by even ALLOWING a guy to take you out and spend money on you when it's OBVIOUS he is BUYING you. In that case, either PONY UP THE GOODS or HAVE ENOUGH SELF RESPECT TO STOP LETTING GUYS SPEND MONEY ON YOU.
He can't be buying if there isn't an agreed transaction taking place. And, wouldn't it be cheaper/easier to get a prostitute if all he's doing is buying sex?? A prostitute is a sure thing.
But yeah, I totally don't get why women allow guys to pay for everything when they are dating. Very, very old-fashioned and silly.
Actually, it has EVERYTHING to do with the thread topic as the OP CLEARLY laid out the scenario of wining & dining and the intent with apparent lack of action. I offered a logical and factual conclusion - but perhaps you didn't understand, let me clarify this again.
If you're PAYING FOR ANYTHING to entertain a woman in hopes of sex, you're a complete idiot. If you're the woman who is dolling herself up and creating SEX APPEAL so men will take you out and spend money on you, YOU'RE ALSO AN IDIOT. And if you're not putting out, you're also a liar ;)
Here are some FACTS:
1. Men KNOW that SOME women will whore themselves out - to be wined and dined, or in any way have money spend on them to provide sex.
2. Women KNOW that they can get SOME men to take them out and spend money on them because of their sexuality, even though they have no intentions of having sex with said men.
3.These men don't seem to understand that spending money on a woman in and of itself does NOT make them attracted to you. Technically they are a john paying women in hopes that she is a whore.
4.Despite statements to the contrary, these women know EXACTLY what they are doing, and why the guy is spending money on them. They CHOOSE to let the guy continue doing so, and either directly have the intent of taking him for a ride (If he's dumb enough to think that spending money on me means I'll have sex with him, that's his problem) or trying to twist the truth of the situation as not to feel they are a "bad" person (Oh, he's my friend/he's doing this because he's a gentleman/he knows that I'm not interested in sleeping with him)
Once again, to summarize: Men are idiots, women are idiots. Men are paying what they assume to be whores, and are disgruntled when they don't get the goods. Women are whoring out regardless of whether they put out or not, merely by leaving it open and letting the man continue to try and "buy them off"
Just because you don't blow a guy, doesn't make you any less of a whore. If your sexuality is all you have going for you, good luck with that whole finding a life partner thing.
Just because she doesn't put out, or she requires a "relationship" doesn't make you any less of a John. Paying for sex and paying for SEXUALITY are the SAME THING. Get some better qualities other than money and you will have people around that actually like YOU, not what you PROVIDE them monetarily.
That is all.
-Jeremy | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/5/2010 8:03:08 PM |
^oh pleeeeeze!...
...any many who can't afford to wine and dine a lady shouldn't ask her out FOR A MEAL.
/null set\
to me sex appeal is "by definition the projection of the ability to" ensure a mutually satisfying sexual union
That's a given, by the definition of "woman", of "man".
"Bad sex" defines neither. Not every women wants a man, not every man wants a woman. Their choice.
This thread IS about women who like men, men who like women ... and want to get to know each other. Tricks and hookers have been mentioned, but neither one likes the other. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/5/2010 8:11:58 PM | To those who feel that most men are honest and decent... do a web search as I did... between 50 and 70 % of Married Men cheated or will cheat in their marriages. More than half of the Married Spouses did not know that their wife or Husband was cheating. One sex was unaware of their Married partner's infidelity 70 % of the time. Yep, it referred to Married Men cheating in those statistics.
my source is ask.com, which directed me to askmen.com
According to those above mentioned statistics, MOST MARRIED MEN ARE NOT DECENT HUMAN BEINGS, if you consider their having committed, or their likelyhood to commit Marital infidelity to be indecent. Do the majority of men become indecent human beings when they become married ? Not likely.
Of 3 statistical reports, men cheated more often than women in their marriages.
In addition to these reported statistics, If most men are decent, why are there multiple dating sites, personality questionaires, with countless women who expressed distaste in men who are married and looking extra marital sex, players, liars, and men who are just looking for sex ? If these qualities that women often complain about in men, were non existant , why would so many women be complaining ?
If most men were decent human beings, why would the statistics that prove otherwise, to be so high ? And with qualities like these, OP, that's NOT Sex Appeal. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/5/2010 8:19:13 PM | ahhhhhhhh .... would you mind very much if you were asked, in the spirit of this dating site, to take your political views somewhere else?
A statement by a man that men as a class are not decent human beings holds little value to most women. If you doubt that, go to any place with singles and music any Friday night and ask around. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/5/2010 8:21:53 PM |
If most men were decent human beings, why would the statistics that prove otherwise, to be so high ? And with qualities like these, OP, that's NOT Sex Appeal. Statistically, women aren't that far behind men in the world of cheating.  | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/5/2010 8:37:38 PM | " ahhhhhhhh .... would you mind very much if you were asked, in the spirit of this dating site, to take your political views somewhere else? "
If you don't like the research and statististics that I've provided, you manipulate them into what you perceive as my political views ? And then you turn those findings into a statement made by a man ? Too bad you can't argue that both Google and Ask.com gave these results.
I am the second person that you have invited to go elsewhere. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/5/2010 8:50:57 PM | | This is a dating site for women and men who like each other. We'd thank you kindly for remembering that. Left-wing, right-wing, zero-wing, aluminum-helmet-wing politics are best discussed on their individual sites. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/5/2010 10:11:11 PM | ^^JSNC7 at least you scored an invite!...
methinks mr ww leans very much to the right, and i'm not talking of below the belt... | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 2:46:26 AM | " ^^JSNC7 at least you scored an invite!...
methinks mr ww leans very much to the right, and i'm not talking of below the belt... "
Thank you, Daffie.
"Sex appeal" is, by definition, the projection of the ability to sire (or birth) children more likely to survive to adulthood. "
The term ' Sex Appeal ' is as simple as it sounds, if one can grasp the concept of abbreviation. In the instance of the original creation of this thread, which is not debatable , the abbreviation SEX, was meant as sexual , as in sexual Appeal.
Not all people who find someone sexually appealing, want to have children, or start a Family with that person, or with anyone else. Money in a bank is appealing to many people. Appealing doesn't mean that they will ACT on that appeal by stealing it.
I'm all for differences of opinion, and different ways of thinking. This original thread was NOT created with the concept of having children, as a thought or goal. I should know.
Since ww feels he knows more about this thread than I do, and he has invited 2 people including myself to go elsewhere, I invite ww to reveal his clout and position of Employment with Plenty Of Fish.
( Formerly, Gone To The Beach, 09 ) | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 4:11:07 AM |
All this sturm and drang and for what??
We're discussing men that drop a wad of cash and then get all butt hurt because they aren't getting any tail. However, the first thing that comes to mind isn't how screwed up the quid pro quo sex for dinner(s) expectation, it's why people are so stuck in that stale old paradigm.
Seriously people, KILL OFF THE DINNER DATE!!!!
I wonder how many women would at the end of an enjoyable evening spent on some non-traditional activity date would be upset that it wasn't an expensive dinner date? Probably not many, so why are people so hung up on the dinner date? I suspect it's because it's easy. It doesn't require any thought, just enough room on the credit card.
[sweeping generalization alert/] I seems to me that if you want to get to know someone's persona, go on an expensive dinner date. However, if you want to get to know the person behind the mask, go have a few drinks, shoot pool, and sing karaoke.
Just my $0.02 USD The above post not only solves this thread, but needs to be posted again.
Men: don't like picking up the tab without a return for your investment? Stop doing it. You can't take women out for dinner to get to know them expecting them all to pan out and become relationships, can you? Suggest coffee or drinks, and just don't date women who tell you they expect to be taken to dinner. This REALLY isn't rocket science. Taking a woman to dinner to get to know her is a throwback from the days women lived withtheir parents and men had to impress the family. He knew her already and wanted one on one time. He picked her up and took her for a meal. She likely didn't work. Total 1957...if you must do things that way, then don't complain about the results. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 4:29:09 AM |
I am the second person you asked to go elsewhere
lol yep, I'm the other person. Must be a very exclusive club if it's just you and me :)
...asking a woman to dinner to get to know her is a throwback from the days women lived with their parents and men had to impress the family.
Some guys normally dine out a couple or more times a week and some other guys like going out to dinner if they get someone to go with - so it's unlikely to change.
I soooo agree with not whinging about the results if you don't get sex. I really had no idea that 'dinner' was code for 'sex' anyway. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 4:41:54 AM |
This is a dating site for women and men who like each other. We'd thank you kindly for remembering that. I am a part of your first sentence. But I did NOT ask you to include me in that "we" thing! Seems to be a bit of "politics" involved when one person says they're speaking for all. Sort of like being the King or something.
From the original opening post:
Most women DO put a lot of effort into getting ready for a date... they use make up, wear bras to show maximum breast appeal, dye their hair, and look as appealing as they can for a man. Whoops, ya lost me there. It's in my profile. No make up, no bras, and certainly (although not mentioned) no hair dye. I've also mentioned, in profile, that I'm not looking to be wined and dined! As for sex appeal.. in my mind, my opinion, that has nothing to do with either person 'putting on' the appeal. It's just there. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 8:53:12 AM |
ahhhhhhhh .... would you mind very much if you were asked, in the spirit of this dating site, to take your political views somewhere else?
The forums are for anyone who cares to post an opinion. Many people are here for posting not dating.
As far as I know, you are not a moderator. Thank goodness. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 9:38:15 AM |
The forums are for anyone who cares to post an opinion. Many people are here for posting not dating.
Well, let me state an opinion then.
-- Men who patronize women as paid companions (whether cash, or dinners, or jewelry) are losers.
NOT an opinion of mine, but rather the consensus of the psychology community in the helping professions:
-- Women who are paid companions don't like men (more generally, no sex worker likes his/her tricks, no matter their orientation or trade).
Anecdote:
Not long ago I interviewed a former high-end call girl for a novel I have in process.
She indicated she LOVED the business. She worked the business for six years as a young woman. During those six years she was homeless for at least six times. After she left the business she was jailed at least once (for petty thievery, she said, food to eat because she was hungry), though a jail sentence would seem rather harsh for her admitted transgression.
She was, when I interviewed her, living in a homeless shelter, unable to scrape together $300 to get to SoCal where she wanted to go (she had written a movie script 12 years ago and wanted to get the movie produced and get rich). When asked why she didn't get a job (and save $300) at Macy*s or Home Depot or wherever, she said "they don't pay a living wage."
By the interview time, she was in her early 40's and when asked about important men in her life over the years, she evaded the question with a tilt of her head, a smile and a comment on my shirt.
Again, my opinion:
-- Men who patronize women as paid companions (whether cash, or dinners, or jewelry) are losers. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 11:48:49 AM | "Sex appeal" is, by definition, the projection of the ability to sire (or birth) children more likely to survive to adulthood. "
To show how this statement is but ONE opinion, or hopeful destination, and not THE majority answer as it was passed off as.... Companies who make products like Trojan Condoms, Flourish, and make fortunes. Hetero couples who want to start a family, do not use condoms, every time they have sex. Gay people who use, or do not use condoms, have no interest in sire or birthing children with their same sex partner. A Simple Google Search would have educated, as well as potentially enlightened the Poster who made the above statement that appears in quotations.
Sex APPEAL is a very different world from a SEX ACT.
Research is sometimes a wonderful thing. It can make people who think they know it all, humble, AND appear as intelligent as they THINK they are. A Humble person can be very sexy to me, where a uninformed, egotistical know it all, with a bully's chip on their shoulder of either sex, in MY opinion, and the opinion of many others, is a complete turn off . | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 12:45:37 PM | I hang in there with the suspicions of "Rape". By that I mean I will "attempt" rape. I will continue until what I believe to be "frozen ambition". This occurs when the woman fails to involve herself in the experience presented to her.
Failure to involvements combined with personal involvement to me constitutes rape, and I refuse to involve myself in it.
The woman I want is my sexual slave. If she can not consent to that, she obviously has NO desire for me. I have no need for such trash distractions.
The woman I want also wants me in return. If she fails such desire, she is worthless to me. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 3:55:10 PM | The other info was just to show anyone can post stats.......How they are interpreted is what is important.
Anastasia did not post the stat originally; she was responding to what someone else had said. How is it helpful to bring up even more off topic remarks in response?
You have to decide what they mean........I didn't even say which gender was which......So if you took it as a offense that is on you.
Why would I be offended by statistics? I do realize you are attempting to cast the blame for the large number of divorces in north America on one gender (which would be silly, because clearly a marriage takes two to make it work) and that's why I thought you were perhaps trying to start another off topic argument.
I am the second person you asked to go elsewhere .................................................................
lol yep, I'm the other person. Must be a very exclusive club if it's just you and me :)
I am the third person who was asked to go elsewhere by the same poster. I did not agree with him, so he thought I should leave!
This is a dating site for women and men who like each other. We'd thank you kindly for remembering that. Left-wing, right-wing, zero-wing, aluminum-helmet-wing politics are best discussed on their individual sitese
Are you using the Royal "We" here? I don't believe you have been elected to speak on behalf of others.
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 4:57:34 PM | I want a hot man to take me out to a swanky restaurant so I can have sex w/ him afterwards...if we get dessert, does that mean the sex will be off the charts? | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 5:28:23 PM |
I want a hot man to take me out to a swanky restaurant so I can have sex w/ him afterwards
If a man is truly hot, what red-blooded woman wants to sit through dinner to get at dessert?
That is the reason hot men seldom(*) do dinner dates, except in an established relationship when they (the couple) want to celebrate something.
Non-hot men (losers in the gene pool) offer any barely-met woman dinner in the hopes she will stick around for a couple hours at a time.
(*) Hot men who in fact are gay or partially gay will often offer dinner to women so they --- the man -- might be seen in public with a woman to stifle rumors.
Want more opinions?
Or, if you want facts, check the psychology details of the typical trick, as understood by the psychology set of the social helper profession. Literature and movies aside, it's an ugly business. | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 5:55:55 PM |
Anastasia did not post the stat originally; she was responding to what someone else had said. How is it helpful to bring up even more off topic remarks in response?
Yes she was the first to post them the post she was rebutting didn't post stats just had the statement. That most men and women that marry stay married. Which is true.
She posted three stats. The stats for first marriage divorces are at 41% leaving 59% married which mean most marriages work.
She also posted the second marriage stats at 60% and the third marriage stats at 73%.
Now the way she posted it it seems as there are way more marriages that end in divorce.
Not true as you can't add the stats as she was leading to. If you add just the first and second stats you get 101% now it doesn't take a rocket scientist to know you can't have a percentage higher than 100%!
The off topic remarks were to show the way she presented the stats were wrong.
Why would I be offended by statistics? I do realize you are attempting to cast the blame for the large number of divorces in north America on one gender (which would be silly, because clearly a marriage takes two to make it work) and that's why I thought you were perhaps trying to start another off topic argument.
Which highlights the way she presented her facts............. slanted to seem that more marriages ended in divorce than stay married.....Which again is not true.....Kinda like the stats I showed which are correct....But don't mean one gender is to blame more than another.....But you thought that is why I posted them......However you were wrong. See how the context in which you post stats can't slant them! | |
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| That's WHY It's Called Sex Appeal Posted: 12/6/2010 6:21:58 PM | But you thought that is why I posted them......However you were wrong. See how the context in which you post stats can't slant them!
You say your intention was to refute the poster's stats about the number of divorces. Why, then, did you make any reference to which gender initiates the divorces? You meant something by it, or you would not have mentioned it at all.... | |
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