| | A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?Page 19 of 20 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20) | Well, at least xlr8ingmatgo makes it simple. She doesn't have sex on the first date, she is outta there on the third, so bring your condoms on date #2, cause that's when it's going to happen.......sort of takes the challenge out of it, but you don't have to do much thinking or guessing. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 2/14/2011 5:23:53 PM | Agreed^^^ you actually understand something Ive posted!
Thing is even though I have lots of first dates; I have very few second ones in comparison by far. The chemistry Im talking about isnt a joke.
When I find that needle in the hay stack I do pay attention and I dont waste time playing games. I actually do know what I want and what I will tolerate.
 even if sometimes it is just sex. I admit it unlike most. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 2/14/2011 5:33:37 PM | Thing is even though I have lots of first dates; I have very few second ones in comparison by far. The chemistry Im talking about isnt a joke.
Ditto. No chemistry, no second date.
I admit it unlike most.
That's probably accurate. Given that just about every relationship I've ever had in the last 30 years started with sex on a second date, I'd be rather surprised to find many women who wouldn't have sex on a second date if it was the ``right'' guy. In any case, you only live once.
sort of takes the challenge out of it, but you don't have to do much thinking or guessing
The challenge is getting the second date. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 2/14/2011 7:25:46 PM |
I stated that anyone CAN be a great lover... not that everyone will be a great lover... It's like dancing... and like dancing not all moves are attractive to all people... The ability is within all of us to a certain degree, what we do with it, is up to ourselves...
and mechanically proficient is certainly not what I meant...
In Dancing there are types and styles that are exactly the same in every culture and it is the same with sex. There are certain basic things each gender should know (giving head- every guy likes it the same way for the basics anyway and if you don't you are the exception). There are basic places your hands/fingers should go and that is definitely synonymous to each gender and by your mid teens you should know how to do this and believe it or not at 30 there are people who do not know that, at my age I am certainly not teaching someone these things because you should know it already. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 2/14/2011 7:56:43 PM |
I stated that anyone CAN be a great lover...
That's the part with which I disagree. You are confusing mechanical skills attained from experience with an innate sensuality that has nothing to do with anything mechanical or how a person likes some specific thing done. I'd say that if you don't recognize it, then you really don't appreciate anything but the mechanics. When you said that everyone was a virgin once, in effect, you said as much. The aspect of sensuality to which I refer is something you can recognize in a person with essentially no sexual experience. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 2/14/2011 8:49:16 PM |
You are confusing mechanical skills attained from experience with an innate sensuality that has nothing to do with anything mechanical or how a person likes some specific thing done.
It seems to me that you are misunderstanding either my words or my intent...
The sensualness of the experience can still be learned/experienced if one is open to it... and we all can be open to it... The basic mechanics of sex is not what I'm talking about... to my mind too many are concerned with the baisc "Insert Part A into Part B, partially remove, - Repeat until orgasm..." And they don't adapt either technique, or awareness or anything else to each new person... and they don't learn from each new experience... Sure, I guess it's possible to not be a good lover, but I think we all have the capability... unless constrained by limited intellect, awareness, empathy etc.... | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 2/14/2011 8:53:28 PM |
There are certain basic things each gender should know (giving head- every guy likes it the same way for the basics anyway and if you don't you are the exception).
It depends on what you define as basics...
Sure if you're going to define a basic as place mouth over penis... then that's certainly a basic, but even dogs will do that...
I define basics as being on a little higher level than that... | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 2/15/2011 12:33:26 AM | | I think one thing that is becoming obvious here is that what makes a wonderful or great lover is not something to be found in a manual, there is no recipe for it. Different people like different things and feel differently about what makes sex wonderful or great. Why does it take a dialogue like this one for that to be known? If you have had a few lovers in your life, and if you are at all thoughtful and sensitive to the actions and reactions of your partners, you would know that. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/9/2012 8:52:07 AM | Isn't it interesting how some things never change, in the dating world ? It was interesting to me to read about the woman who was mentioned here, saying she wouldn't wait for sex on the 3 rd date, which is a role reversal in many dating situations as we know it.
To me, a third date rule, whether from a man or a woman is a bit extreme. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/9/2012 10:40:26 AM | I would NEVER have sex by date #3.(I say never, but I've done it before). It happenned often enough, and it usually leads nowhere. I've read a few times women mentionning men loosing interest after sex. Well the opposite is also true, and as such, since I want solid, I need to know if she'll stick around for ME instead of the contents of my pants.
Up until now, I've never been disapointed, and neither did they. What I want first and foremost is a relationship. If I want sex I'll walk up to my local gas station naked, and I'm sure I'll have takers a plenty.
Besides, sex is about love for me, and "feeling the right moment". Never done me wrong yet. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/9/2012 10:42:55 AM |
You are confusing mechanical skills attained from experience with an innate sensuality that has nothing to do with anything mechanical or how a person likes some specific thing done.
I'd like to quote Batman on this particular issue, and I've found it to be true throughout most of my adult life;
"The trainning is NOTHING! The WILL is EVERYTHING!".
Thanks  | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/9/2012 10:52:41 AM | " I need to know if she'll stick around for ME instead of the contents of my pants. "
Are we talking about what's in your wallet, or maybe the size of your..... KEY RING ? lol
To the OP, I don't think that sex should be expected. It shouldn't be a performance. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/9/2012 11:34:49 AM | | anyone expecting sex from me, within any set time frame would be a deal breaker, and I am far from a prude :) First time having sex shouldn't come until both parties are comfortable with each other, stupid expectations creates pressure, and sex should be relaxed, flowing, and non scripted, | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/10/2012 5:20:54 AM | well, according to Cosmo (my bible), if sex is gonna happen its usually by the 3rd or 4th date, after that your in friend-zone.This is assumming you both are healthy, normal sexual, adults.When i was in my 20's i once waited a year and a half for this young woman to come around..she never did..and that was a year and half i'll never get back. That aint gonna happen again..burn me once..shame on you..burn me twice ..shame on me..
As to your question..just DO IT, man!! Until you have intimate relations..how do you know u are truly compatible? | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/10/2012 7:03:09 PM | If a guy expects sex by the third date....and won't wait....
then we're not right for each other, and should go our separate ways =)
I won't do something I don't want to do just to keep someone around.
Personally...I prefer sex on the 25th date. lol =) | |
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d2327h
| | Joined: 2/23/2012
Msg: 468 | |
| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/10/2012 7:42:11 PM | I completely agree.
I just had my 3rd date with an awesome guy and everything was going great including the goodnight kiss when he suggested we get together over the weekend and hinted at having sex. I just kind of smiled because....what DO you say? lol At that point he says, "Do you have a 5 date rule or something?"
I have no rules or timetables and it usually happens when it happens, and I told him that. I really liked him but now i feel all creepy like there is some kind of expectation of sex which, for me, ruins the romantic part of it. Now it's an appointment--that I haven't scheduled with him. lol
Oh well! | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/10/2012 8:11:32 PM | Old thread and subject matter 
I believe it all depends on how well you can read people. Majority it seems put way too much emphasis on sex. It should never be a definitive factor in the progression of relationship (if there is a such) nor should there be a time frame. In my understanding 3 date rule came to be to verify that your prospect isn't a psychotic killer. Honesty and mutual comfort levels is what's most important and there is a difference between teasing and playing games. Teasing is fun | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/11/2012 1:25:28 PM |
My question to everyone, MEN AND WOMEN... how would you feel if a potential partner told you, ( or you read in a Forum ) that this person would not wait for sex with you on a 3 rd date ?
Actually this wouldn't bother me, kind of good to know, ya know? Sounds to me this person is weeding out people not of the same ilk. May they find their match! | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/11/2012 7:22:38 PM | | With this being the age of texting and all, it seems the "1" "2" or "3" date really isn't the way it used to be. Some people will text or call someone for almost a month before meeting. The first initial meeting is def a no go, because u need to make sure that there is a physical in person attraction. But if you talk to someone for day's or weeks before the next date, is that really just the second date? I am a firm believer in "it takes time" to know a true person, so I am never in a rush for sex, but if u both feel it, and feel the moment is right, then that's what matters. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/12/2012 3:22:20 AM | " I am a firm believer in "it takes time" to know a true person, so I am never in a rush for sex, but if u both feel it, and feel the moment is right, then that's what matters. "
It does take time to know a person. I also firmly believe that whether 2 mature, consenting adults have sex on their first date, or wait 6 months , their pre existing personal issues are going to be the same, and the relationship will remain or end due to those personal issues, NOT whether the couple had sex on the first date, the 2nd, the 3rd....
I am not , ' blanket advocating' first date sex. I'm saying that in the context of the pre existing personal issues, and conditions that I mentioned in the above paragraph, if first date sex happens, it doesn't matter for those reasons mentioned above. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/12/2012 8:31:21 PM | | I generally take time to get to know him as a friend first. I know that may sound out dated to some but not to me. If further down the road (and there's no time stamp here) You have become friends and want to take it further then communication aught to have beem there already. If you decide to be friends there's nothing wrong with that either! :=) | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/12/2012 9:00:18 PM |
That's the part with which I disagree. You are confusing mechanical skills attained from experience with an innate sensuality that has nothing to do with anything mechanical or how a person likes some specific thing done. I'd say that if you don't recognize it, then you really don't appreciate anything but the mechanics. When you said that everyone was a virgin once, in effect, you said as much. The aspect of sensuality to which I refer is something you can recognize in a person with essentially no sexual experience.
Amen. Thanks for saying this so well, Abelian. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 4/13/2012 1:35:00 AM | | I would think that is nonsense. There are no numbers that are appropriate to this. But also there should be no prejudging if it is the first. It is how you feel, what you choose and when you choose to be intimate. No numbers are approriate. I was told not to long ago from a guy he didnt call because he had been told that he had to wait a certain "number" of days. I said that is just silly. Be who you are, dont play games. Call if you want to or don't call if you don't want to. Just be 'real' stop the games people. | |
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