| | A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?Page 2 of 20 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20) |
If they don't want to 'wait for sex with me" then they don't want ME, they just want the sex.
Lol. Poor guys.
Are they allowed to have sex without you while they wait for you to make up your mind? | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 1:54:48 PM |
How many women, and men have not had sex by the end of their 2 nd date, and because of this, were turned down for a 3 rd date ?
lol, this sure does seem like a role reversal here. I have a 4 date sex rule- as in, NO sex until at least the 4th date... if a guy can't wait that long then he was only looking for one thing in the first place, and not worth my time. That goes either way, regardless of gender. JMO. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 1:58:40 PM |
How many women, and men have not had sex by the end of their 2 nd date, and because of this, were turned down for a 3 rd date ?
How many suitors actually tell their dates, “The reason I’m not asking you out a third time is because you didn’t shtupp me in two dates or less”? If the decent ones never give an explanation as to why they disappear, why would the asshats? 
My question to everyone, MEN AND WOMEN... how would you feel if a potential partner told you, ( or you read in a Forum ) that this person would not wait for sex with you on a 3 rd date ?
My inner Captain Obvious tells me that any man who would have a dating stipulation that coitus must occur within three dates is a mismatch for me. I prefer a fellow who has a little less indigo tint on his balls. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 2:07:44 PM | OP
Interesting how many men haven't responded to this thread. Would you dare to take a guess as to why that is?
Many guys don't tell you something like that because they know that it'll scare a woman off. A woman might do so to test a man--to see if he was just wanting to jump her bones or, as someone else suggested, she is just looking for a booty call.
But back to your question. How would I feel? Honestly...it would depend on the man. If I were THAT into him where I thought *I* might want to be more of the aggressor...who knows? If I weren't all that interested or wasn't sure, then I wouldn't be turned off, I'd probably just flat out ask him why he felt that way. If he said that's what he expected all of the time then we'd probably go our separate ways.
But...I find that most men aren't that stupid. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 2:07:56 PM | This assumes they're not. C'mon, now.
Badump Bump!
If the decent ones never give an explanation as to why they disappear, why would the asshats?
'cause they're hoping dinner at their place and a look at their 8-track collection will change your mind? | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 2:15:36 PM | Chemistry drives the desire, timetables do not create the chemistry.
If I feel the chemistry on the first date, I communicate the interest and initiate a second date, third and so on. If the woman I have asked out is receptive to provocative banter and openly communicates the interest is mutual.....then that opens the door for me to be more suggestive and toy with the idea that sex is going to be inevitable...not improbable. And when it does happen....it usually is great.
Good things come to those with no agenda, with a potential long term relationship in the making.....anything else is just getting laid. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 2:37:42 PM |
Consigliori: Are they allowed to have sex without you while they wait for you to make up your mind? They're free to do whatever (or whomever) they please. The man I'm interested in is going to share the same morals, values and standards as I do. It's fairly obvious who those men are. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 3:04:11 PM | | Hmmmm, well I can't see having sex that soon into a relationship, but I might be game if some things get established first. Like I would want both of us to be tested for STD's, and we would need to have a chat about what our taste and expectations are. For me there are just certain must when it comes to sex and if she isn't into them then forget the whole thing. I don't think that a relationship will ever be far enough along for sex on the 2nd date but I guess it could happen. Odds are if a woman gave me that ultimatum I would just walk. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 3:09:30 PM |
The man I'm interested in is going to share the same morals, values and standards as I do.
I wouldn't have expected anything less from you.
It's fairly obvious who those men are.
It can't be THAT obvious or we wouldn't have to read so many whiny hedunnit threads. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 3:12:55 PM | | if you are so rigid and self-controlled you notice what date you are on, you are probably a complete dud in bed so it doesn't really matter anyway...people so self-conscious about how many dates they have before sex must be having no fun at all in life in or out of bed... | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 3:43:33 PM | I now just wait for women to make the first move.
Great line from Murphy's Romance:
Sally Fields: Would you like to stay for dinner?
James Garner: Not unless you're fixing me breakfast in the morning!
Sally: How do you like your eggs?
a perfect way to let the man know that "tonight's the night"
I HAVE asked women when the check came:
Are we going dutch as "friends" or is this a date?
Every time it stimulated quite the conversation to say the least.
In sales.. it's called a "laydown". I figure I'll ask for the order AFTER receiving many "buying signals" and not a moment before.. Dating is like making a "feature/benefit" presentation. You do some "trial closes" along the way.
Having worked in some sales capacity for most of my life.. I certainly dont want my personal time to be filled with as much rejection as I've gotten in selling. and I've done quite well over the years to get enough yes' to live a good life. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 4:00:05 PM | ^^^^^^ You go Margo! A woman first time she meets a guy knows if she's interested in sleep with him right of the bat.
Ok OP and to all women as Rule of thumb under Man Rules!
One month is the time line, anything over as rule of thumb the woman typically
has issues concerning her past relationship or baggage not sure of herself or YOU.
Maybe waiting for something better to come along or taking you for an emotional finical ride especially if your always paying when your dating!
Wake-Up Poster everything in life has a time line and an expiry date, whether you like
it or not | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 4:11:07 PM | OP you are taking things too seriously.
I always say that I like to have sex on the first date but that doesn't mean that it actually happens. People say a lot of things in jest that they don't necessarily seriously mean. I wouldn't put a 'date' on the 'first time' for me if the moment and mood is right, it could be on the first date, second, third, fourth, whenever! You can never really predict how things will go there are too many variables involved, including alcohol :-). | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 4:14:37 PM | | Arbitrary time lines are stupid. No matter what kind of rule you set for yourself, there are going to be exceptions to it. I know lots of people who claim to like to wait until they really get to know a person before having sex, and ALL of them have been in situations where they were intimate much quicker than usual because it felt right at the time. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 4:16:01 PM | I have a few female friends who absolutely will not have sex by the third date... they use it as a filter to see if the guy is after a realtionship or sex only...
In fact they will often be up front and tell the guys they're dating that it could be a few months... It isn't always, but as they say, it gets rid of most of the guys who are only after sex...
I've seen a few guys move on not realising they were only one more date from having sex... it's really pretty funny...
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 5:53:50 PM | | Thanks Impune! I do know what I want and go for it. Life is way too short not to. Some people just have not figured that out yet in life. I enjoy the men I choose to date and they enjoy me. The only complaint I get is when one wants to date exclusively and I don't feel the same. I know what I want in that department to and do not settle for less. I've had healthy long term relationships and will again when I find my Mr. Almost Perfect for me. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 6:23:14 PM | There have been a lot of moderate replies from Men and Women in this thread, as well as some scenarious that I've never encountered in my dating experiences.
Usually, most people hear about the MEN having something like a 3 date rule, or something close, before they will move on, because sex has not occured. A woman poster on this thread has confirmed part of the premise of this thread. She stated that she expects sex by the end of the 1 st, or 2 nd date.
If a man had made a statement like this... would the POF Fire Alarm go off, because there would be too many flamers to count ? Does it sound like there's yet another double societal standard out there ? | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 6:25:36 PM | I've only had one woman in all my years impose some kind of prerequistite for dating before sexual considerations.
She had a 5 date rule. I don't remember if it was after 5 dates or on the 5th date. I didn't think anything of it. We had a good time together and enjoyed each others company while we were getting to know each other better.
So we fulfill the 5 dates or whatever it was. Next date sex would of been on the table. We didn't go out after that for I thnk it was 6 or 7 months. Why? I'm not entirely sure, but from my side it was because sex was now expected. All the spontaneity of the "first time" was lost. You only get one chance at that first time and it might be the most special sexual experience you will ever have with that person. You can't plan it. It happens.
Every LTR I have ever had except one, we had sex the very first time we met. 100% of the ones that waited didn't last. That probably contradicts most of the arguements women have for waiting. | |
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| A Twist on EXPECTING Sex by the 3 rd date. Would You Date Her/Him ?
Posted: 10/16/2009 6:33:43 PM |
I've seen a few guys move on not realising they were only one more date from having sex... it's really pretty funny...
The jokes on the woman if the guy was really great and the control freak mentality of x number of months, less on date made all the difference. Once has to wonder, actually, who the luckier of the two are in missing out on the other person.
If a man had made a statement like this... would the POF Fire Alarm go off, because there would be too many flamers to count ? Does it sound like there's yet another double societal standard out there ?
No contribution to the alarm going off from me...either gender is controling with expectations and rigid rules - one for x number of months and the other for 2 to 3 dates. | |
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