| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:17:59 PM | There is an etiquette with regards to phone sex???
Isn't phone sex already a passe in this century? Really.....
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:18:34 PM | | On a serious note, is phone sex really satisfying? I mean, how does foreplay come about via the phone? I guess you have to have a really good imagination to pull it off (no pun intended). I just can't picture myself attempting it. I probably would spend more time giggling than getting off. lol | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:26:30 PM | | Damn now my keypad is all sticky | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:28:08 PM | phone sex doesn't necessarily have to be hard core... haven't you had anyone ask you what you were wearing? or tell you that they touched themselves at the sound of your voice? or tell you that they wish they were lying next to you? that's all part of phone sex?
but your post might bring about good joy! your next phone call may be exactly that.....
On a serious note, is phone sex really satisfying? I mean, how does foreplay come about via the phone? I guess you have to have a really good imagination to pull it off (no pun intended). I just can't picture myself attempting it. I probably would spend more time giggling than getting off. lol | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:28:23 PM | | Might I suggest putting your own cell phone on vibrate, stuff it down your shorts (or up your ***) and then call yourself? Then you don't have to worry about phone sex etiquette at all. Just...phone hygiene. | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:37:23 PM |
phone sex doesn't necessarily have to be hard core... haven't you had anyone ask you what you were wearing? or tell you that they touched themselves at the sound of your voice? or tell you that they wish they were lying next to you? that's all part of phone sex?
Unfortunately no 
*waits for the phone to ring*
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/17/2009 10:59:15 PM |
So again I ask. Does 3 calls sounds about right? I'm really serious about this.
Nope. Not with the information you have given.
I got a little confused with the accent below the Mason Dixon line and how that works with the 3 date rule. She is from way further south than I am. So her accent is much more than mine. Assuming I abide by the 3 phone date 2 day rule and he has a 7 date 3 date rule so we add the 2 together and divide by 2 or do we go with my liberal rule or her more stringent rules?
It's been2 calls and it's after 12:00 my time. 11:00 her time so and we have both already agreed that neither one of us are too good at math. I have to figure this out quickly as I'm suppose to call her back. This would be call 3 and day 2.
By what you have posted, it should be on the eighth call. Unless you introduce a random variable. (It better be a big variable.) Telephone that is... | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/17/2009 11:11:06 PM | Don't be a cad!
First, you have to have phone coffee. | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 12:28:50 AM | I consulted my bible....er I mean this random book that just happens to be on my shelf..."The Art of Distance Shagging" by Peter Wanksalot and Richard Gettinhard...
Wanksalot and Gettinhard go with the three-call rule but also state that 45 minutes of phone conversation counts as a "unit"--one call by any reasonable standard. So by that calculation even if you just have one LONG conversation (2 hours and a quarter, to be exact) you should be good to go!!
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 12:52:30 AM | | I used to date this girl that loved phone sex and dirty texts and i used to feel like a tool doing it. I tried it and i don't like so maybe im not a person that is stimulated by words as i am by touch this is why i never bring up the idea but will do it if it makes my partner happy. | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 12:59:49 AM | I hate it when women try getting me into sex on the phone.
I just feel sooooooooooooooooo used.
OMG ,, do ya think her boyfriend freddy is standing there wank'n willie ???  | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 2:36:21 AM | op
a little boy was calling a 900 number when his grandpa caught him. grandpa said you shouldn't be calling those numbers, you could catch a disease. the little boy said grandpa how could i catch a disease over the phone? grandpa said, i don't know but i used to call those numbers and now i have hearing aids......
i tried to have phone sex once, but the holes were too small....
your mama's so nasty i had phone sex with her and got an ear infection...
how's it working for you? | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 2:47:22 AM | Why not rev it up notch and get the webcams going ..
actions speak louder than words
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 3:01:40 AM | haven't you had anyone ask you what you were wearing? or tell you that they touched themselves at the sound of your voice? or tell you that they wish they were lying next to you? that's all part of phone sex?
Sure I have! Numerous times! And thank goodness it was someone who...:
1. Actually knew what I looked like when I described what I was wearing...because he has actually SEEN me in the sexy get-up...right down to my "little mole, you know where"...
2. Actually knew what my real voice was like when he became aroused because he had been with me, and aroused me...whispering the same things in his ear that aroused him beyond belief...
3. Yes, because they actually did wish they were laying next to me...the REAL me...because they had done so before...and nothing else compared to it...
No offense, and no ego trip here...but, reality far exceeds fantasy when the rubber meets the road.
Hate to break it to you guys...and likely will make NO difference, but that "fantasy" chick on the other end of the phone line...is more than likely clipping her corn-chip toenails, flipping thru the Hi-Fi channels, placing tons of incoming calls on "call wait"...answering emails....AND balancing her bouncing checkbook while she is supposedly screaming...."OOOOOH BABY....." *ho hum...are my toenails dry*....
to YOU.
Ain't love just grand?!  | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 3:52:08 AM | Boy oh boy oh boy.....
When you set the playful mood, and get THAT flow going, and she sounds like she is game, you're on. Other than that, forget it. It's not in the numbers.
I'd probably spend the time giggling instead of getting off
Ditto! giggles all the way! | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 4:17:00 AM | OMG... I can't even believe you're serious! Phone sex before you even meet in real life? I hope you know that she is really a he! LOL
If I had someone I spoke with.... never met.... try to do phone sex on the 3rd call... I'd give HIM the DIAL tone! Hmmm unless I was REALLY horny..... NOPE I'd still give him the dial tone! | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 9:38:21 AM | I don't know about anybody else, but I tend to enjoy pleasing. Nothing is better than hearing your phone go 64, 463! 64, 463! 937! 937! 937!!!!!
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 10:04:01 AM | I wanted to thank everyone for their great advice. Things didn't exactly go as planned last night, but I'm still hopeful.
Fantasy woman called me back late last night for our 3rd phone date. I had everything planned so carefully. I emailed her prior to the call with the POF gifts of a candlelit dinner and a glass of wine. I also included some romantic music. She likes oldies so I sent links to "girl, you'll be a woman soon" and "this magic moment".
She finally called me back and I let her know that this was now the 3rd phone date so we would need to oblige the rulebook and have phone sex.
She then told me she wasn't having any kind of sex with anybody unless he passed an STD test. I told her no problem, hung up and googled Standard tests on the internet. There were so many choices so I filtered for standard dating tests.
The first one I took was called "Are you really that into her?" The first question was "what is her name?" and I didn't get passed there.
So I went to the next test titled " Men are from Mars Women are from Venus". Well I have seen the movie "Predator vs. Aliens" 3 times so I figured I would ace this one. But the first question was "are you trying to fix her?" I answered YES. Wrong again. I took it as a sign. Maybe she didn't need screwing.
For those who asked if I am being serious. Of course I am. It says so in the original post 
Have a nice Sunday! | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 10:25:58 AM | | I guess if this is the ONLY way you can get some, go for it. | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 10:28:01 AM | Just remember, kids: When you have unprotected phone sex, you are not only having phone sex with that phone, but with every other phone that phone has had sex with.
(Do phones have genders? Is there such a thing as a gay or a bi phone? Are there female phones "living inside" male phones? Is there such thing as a cross-dressing phone?)
Chauncey - why would we not take you seriously? Especially since you made the effort to phone. (Unless you're just a big PHONEY!) | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 10:40:22 AM | HA HA HA HA HA!!! You guys crack me up!
I needed a good laugh. For those of you that have read some of my other posts on different threads here's a laugh just for you...
Talk about phone etiquette... I just had this guy I've been seeing switch things up on me and broke up with me OVER the phone because I did not feel like driving two hours to have sex! Serves me right! He was so mad he yelled at me and slammed the phone. BAD phone etiquette...
He could have had phone sex with me first! | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/18/2009 11:27:59 AM | | OP, first you have to determine if the lady in question has a "hands free" device. If not, this relationship is going nowhere in a hurry, regardless of how many phone dates you have. | |
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| Phone etiquette
Posted: 10/19/2009 3:39:14 AM | OP!! I tried calling you last night but all I got was your call answer service! So - I told them to tell you "Fvk You!" .. there .. that (In my rules book) counts for our first time and I gotta say I was left feeling, a 'little' less than satisfied.
It was bad enough I got your answering service - but Then "Someone" was trying to beep in on my action! I have Never been so  ! That said - I did have my way with your call service - despite the frequent interruptions by your beep thing And that I don't have a hands free device, nor do I have a hands free phone.
I just thought I should let you know the lengths to which I have gone attempting to do my part, pay for my own coffee .. so to speak 
This morning I tried to call you again, as I have read on the internet that 'morning phone sex' is the best, for no other reason than morning breath doesn't interfere (as much).. BUT - I got that recording that your number was no longer in service. Of course I had to wonder if that was due to all the wear and tear on your lines and the (obvious) abuse of the beep feature.
So, then I thought ' why not take it to the next level? ' - as there was no further thought (aka no reason not to) I decided to text your cell - you know "morning phone text sex" but I didn't know how to type ,,!,,
I am still on hold btw 
(oh and after all the calls, the hang ups, the messages and the beeps - You owe me a ring!)
ring ring | |
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