| Searches should only return people you can contact
Posted: 10/30/2009 4:59:00 PM | > You mean like how some posters try to insult others by insinuating things?
No insult intended. You said that you "tried it and they all came back with the same theme."
>> Why conclude that everyone is thinking the same thing that you do, when that is not the case.
> I said "It is clearly understood that someone looking for an intimate encounter is someone looking for sex with out any attachments unless otherwise specified."
It might be clearly understood, to you, but meeting to have sex is not the definition of intimate encounter. If 50% of people think that sex means humping a tree, this does not mean that humping a tree is the definition of a sexual encounter, likewise of 50% of the people think sex means picking leaves from a tree. Google shows a number of hits with intimate encounter that have nothing to do with sex, including a number of books.
Almost anything can be said with a sexual innuendo, but this does not make all words a specific definition of sex.
> What or how you want to interpreted something is completely up and is a personal decision.
Yes and my interpretation is congruent with the dictionary definition.
> The site is not responsible for telling people what to think, that is up to you.
Hopefully not, but the status does seek to categorize people based on narrow definitions.
> That is why I like POF, they do not dumb it down.
If only life were so easy, that I could define people by the first two words that they speak. | |
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| Searches should only return people you can contact
Posted: 10/30/2009 5:01:43 PM | From our FAQ's at the top of this page
http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts6052647.aspx#6053277
msg 2 is
I AM LOOKING FOR - Definitions
The following are the general and "INTENDED" definitions of the choices available in your profile - your interpretation may vary, yet they should suffice for the majority of people.
Intimate Encounter
A strictly physical relationship with no emotional attachment, usually - define your own terms.
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Again we can all interpret these things differently but we can use this as a starting point perhaps.
This thread was not about Intimate Encounters and it has been hijacked of sorts.
We have covered the IE angle to death. It is what it is. There is no way to reset the IE filter. Most people like the way it works for obvious reasons. The few that don't like it are caught in the filter. And the rest like it that way.
Cowboy | |
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| Searches should only return people you can contact
Posted: 10/30/2009 5:26:18 PM | Good response, Cowboy.
> The few that don't like it are caught in the filter.
I am not aware of ever having been "caught" in the filter, and would probably not know if I had been.
That is the end of my comments on this topic, unless someone responds to me.
Thanks to those who have shared. | |
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| Searches should only return people you can contact
Posted: 10/31/2009 1:12:34 AM | If a search shows you someone you are blocked from sending to, you may be reasonably able to change you profile to match. For example, "Talk/E-Mail" and "Friends" aren't all that different for most users - though one can include the hope of offline friendship, too - and I often see people seeking one but barring the other. Changing one's staus to make a contact would at least let one find out how fine the distinctions are. I once mailed an "Activity Partner" profile and got told my looks weren't what they wanted (long hair), which one might have thought lessimportant to an AP.
The first time I received a message from a woman specifying "Other Relationship," I replied, asking what it meant. Never heard back from her. Since then, all the contacts I've received from "Other Relationship" seekers were from people wanting to sell me new-agey "healing," "reading" or other mysterious powers. Were it not for the forums, I'd have never guessed - in the two and a half years I've been here - that OR acted like IE ("Intimate Encounter") in tarring one for life. Lucky I never tried to make first contact with any of these folks.
I think that IE is pretty clear, given the context of dating sites. OR seems a good candidate for clarification.
The target I always wish I could specify is "Girlfriend!"
ED BEAR
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| Searches should only return people you can contact
Posted: 11/2/2009 8:32:08 AM | Good post Ed_Bear,
I am caught in the filter, as one person said, because I honestly didn't bother to read the fine print.
It is my fault, and that's that....
But wouldn't it be more illuminating and honest if your profile showed what kind of contacts you were making? Let the people you are trying to make contact with make the decision, is what I'm saying.
I mean, really, if I truly wanted to make an intimate encounter this site would allow me to set up three such arrangements that no one would ever know about. Then I could continue to contact people who would assume that I was clean as snow.
It just seems that it could be improved upon, is all.... | |
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| Searches should only return people you can contact
Posted: 11/2/2009 1:22:35 PM | Were it not for the forums, I'd have never guessed - in the two and a half years I've been here - that OR acted like IE ("Intimate Encounter") in tarring one for life.
Only in Terms of Searches, but these don't "tar" you.
Only messaging Users with a Setting of 'Intimate Encounter' will enable the Filter, as many People also conceive of 'Other Relationship' to connotate non-sexual Activities.
Further, your Mail Settings have a separate Checkbox blocking Contact for each 'Intimate Encounter' and 'Other Relationship'.
I mean, really, if I truly wanted to make an intimate encounter this site would allow me to set up three such arrangements that no one would ever know about.
And one Day you'll be back here complaining why your Profile was deleted and why you can't create a new one. The Forums are full of such Threads.
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| Searches should only return people you can contact
Posted: 11/4/2009 10:28:40 PM | Oh Good Lord.
John, give it up. If you don't have a clue that "intimate encounter" means sex, you are being obtuse. Sheesh.
*EDIT* --- I only read page 1 of this thread before I posted...my sentiment stands, however. | |
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| Searches should only return people you can contact
Posted: 11/6/2009 10:51:33 AM |
I was doing a local search, and didn't put any filters on it. I messaged some of the people, innocently enough, I thought. It turns out that since I told someone that I thought her profile was humorous I now can't contact about half the people here.
(The profile I contacted was one seeking an intimate encounter....)
I suppose that PoF gets the blame for creating this feature, but really the problem is with the people who use this filter. Personally I think it's pretty foolish, but on the other hand it means that I can weed out the fools that choose to use the filter. | |
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| Searches should only return people you can contact
Posted: 11/14/2009 6:33:18 AM | But, TTR - aren't people who have only messaged Other Relationship-seekers are still permanently barred from sending first messages to those who specify nobody who's made first-contact with (several) IE/OR seekers, right? That's the "tarred-for-life" I'm talking about.
The mail filter clearly says, "Have messaged others for sex or intimate encounters."
ED BEAR | |
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