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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 5:05:15 PM | | LOL, although I do agree with some of your comments in this. It for sure had me laughing, and I broke a smile. I would date a woman 6foot, its not what I'd prefer, but it's not a deal-breaker. There has to be muplitiple things I don't like about a women, before I'll consider to not respond, etc. | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 5:14:55 PM | | I'm listening, but just waiting for the good reader, and person with the good opinion to comment. Yes I'm listening, although your earlier comments, turned me off a lot, so I'm waiting for someone else to comment now. | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 6:04:21 PM | OP - Your profile is just a tough read from start to finish. You have taken the advice you liked and discarded the stuff you didn't. To each his own.
Your profile is filled with a couple positives followed by the negatives. Any woman with 1/2 a brain will know what the opposite of the positive qualities you are looking for.
And I notices that you are "I'm deeply interested in Nature, Animals(our brothers)..." - Now is before or just after you kill the poor defenseless spider? Just curious. And don't try and tell me that spiders don't have feelings either.
Your first date? Are you kidding me? You tell me what woman wants to read about your last exploits with some other random woman? I won't even go into how lame it was.
I think someone else said something about these:
Mail Settings (To message gavreel you MUST meet the following criteria.)
Female
Age between 23 and 40
Live in Canada
Must not be looking for Hang Out
Must not be looking for Talk/E-mail
Must not be looking for Other Relationship
Must not be looking for Intimate Encounter
Must not be looking for Activity Partner
Must not do drugs
Must not be married
Tell, me... who CAN contact you? Sheesh.
When a woman sees this...
gavreel has 0 roses that can be sent.
That means you are spitting hot, hot fire at the ladies. Contrary to my personal opinion, women are NOT that stoo-pit.
One last little thing and I will stop picking on you, promise.
You changed your profile a freakin week ago and you are whining that you haven't gotten a hook up yet? Have you ever heard of that four letter word called "patience" before?
Dude, just kill your profile, jump out into the real world and meet people the old fashioned way. | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 6:12:48 PM | You are getting lots of great advise on how to proceed. It is like performance reviews at work or that type of thing. Seem you put a lot onto your career but cannot make it relate to your profile?
I would suggest reading through everyones responses. Reviewing their profiles to research it out and get a good idea on both sides men and women. Me personally I do very well at a place where I can talk to a woman but here swing and a miss. I know my profile is presentation and I am working on more pictures and how to structure a good profile.
Just take it like a pro and adapt to this situation. Relationships with women is a lot of trial and error. You need big smiles and your profile needs to show that.
-Travis | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 6:24:52 PM | | First date should be something you want to do, not something you have already done in a failed relationship. You can keep all that stuff, but describe it as something you'd love to do rather than something you did with a previous woman. | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 6:30:04 PM | Hi, me again. Just so you know where I'm coming from, I was married to a Muncie Chippewa for 26 years and dealt with all the baggage that came with that, so I think I may have a minor understanding of your thought process here.
Being a private person is important. The profile you have now is good, but not great. You're an average height and average looks (sorry, just my opinion on the looks thing) so that's not the problem with your viewers. It may be that you seem to have no humour. Except for the obsession with Tim Horton's, which I personally find hilarious, I can't really see what makes you smile. Yes, you talk about the rivers and the inner things, but it feels like you may have a big wall up for a new person in your life. Been there, done that.
If you have more pictures of you with a big smile, that will help you feel more approachable. Perhaps you could talk a little about the acting - it seems to bring out some people's passionate side and if you can show your viewer you get enthusiastic about something, it may feel more interesting. See how many times I used the word "feel"? When a female is reading your profile, it will be an emotional response that will win her over, not a checklist of great facts about you. You don't have to spill your guts and talk about the first puppy you ever had, but tell her about something you have great passion about.
If you'd rather not discuss this personal stuff on this thread, you can email me privately. | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 7:02:38 PM | | Actually I laugh about everything, and I'm even laughing while reading your comments and suggestions, but I take out the funny stuff, cause everytime i try and write something funny. Some butthole doesn't catch the humor, and take it the wrong way, so I end up changing it so they don't mix my crap up. | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 7:12:57 PM | Hi, gavreel -
I'm in the process of re-writing my own profile, so don't let my empty profile distract (in comparison) from what I say here in this post.
Before I start with my own suggestions, I will say that you have received a wealth of great information in this thread.
_
*** I think the height thing to be totally superficial, and to write something more descriptive about myself, why? You ladies judge completely by the photo, you proved it by the height comment. As for being an open book, it's really not my style.***
Please do not generalize. Some women have height requirements; some do not.
For instance, the height range of men that I have dated in my lifetime have been from 5'2" - 6'8". I give you this information solely to use as an example that it's silly to say that all women want "this" or all women want "that".
_
*** I'll open up when they message me, and we talk on msn. I deal with dating, on equal ground, always have. ***
It sounds as if you have made your mind up about this particular point. I truly wish you well with that decision. However, do know that, as has been said before, many women do not make first contact. Also, some people will wait to do online chatting until after a few rounds of emails have been sent back and forth. If you're not willing to exchange a few emails in the beginning, it seems to me as if you're closing a lot of doors before they ever get opened.
In the meantime, if you change your mind, perhaps you could write down 4 or 5 different "conversation starters" - questions that would help ease you both into chatting. For hints on specific questions, do a search on Google for "conversation starters". Also, I believe it's been suggested that you comment on something in her profile - that serves a great dual purpose; it starts a conversation and it lets the woman know that you've actually taken the time to read their profile. In the subject line of the email, write something specific to what the email is about. For instance, if I were going to send you an email, the subject line might read, "I love nature, too!" And then, I could write just a bit on our common bond - nature; and if you wanted to return the contact, you could also continue the conversation on nature. People rarely get to know each other when one or both parties refuse to have some type of dialogue.
_
As to your profile:
*** To make you happy, to light your worst moment, to carry you when you can't walk. My highest ideal in life, is to forgive the unforgivable, and love the unlovable. ***
I hear your heart on this; truly I do. But these two sentences should NOT be back-to-back. It reads as if you view women as unforgivable and unlovable. Put these two sentences far apart from each other in your profile. Actually, I would suggest deleting the first sentence in its entirety. I'm one of THE most sappy people around, and even I found the first sentence to be "too much." I hear the sentiment behind your words; but frankly, the wording itself is a bit over-the-top and even smothering.
_
Please edit your wording so that all verb tenses are agreeing with each other and all pronouns are written in the same person. When there is consistency in what you write, it will be a smoother read (and therefore, will most likely keep the lady's attention). For example, in your first paragraph, you wrote, " becoming a manager at work, increasing my income over 60k per year, spend more time with loved one's and to commit to something bigger then just myself." Change "becoming" and "increasing" to "become" and "increase". Revise the verb tenses throughout the rest of your profile as needed.
I would also suggest that instead of talking about what you are going to do in the future that you talk about how you're living your life now.
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*** She'd be elegant, well mannered, but won't complain about a spider. Rather just grabs a shoe and kills it, not that I wouldn't do it for you(wink). She should be someone ..." ***
Consider revising this completely. Talk about what you'd like in a woman as if you are speaking directly to one specific woman; that is more personal and more meaningful than reading what some nebulous woman "out there" would do for you.
If you don't want to revise the wording on the above, then at least use the same personage for the pronouns. You use third-person singular (she) several times throughout this particular paragraph several times; and then, you suddenly switch to second-person singular (you). It's an abrupt change and stops the flow of reading instantly. Also, where you do make the change, it almost seems a bit condescending . . . as if to say, "Other women can kill a spider, but if you can't, then I'll do it for you."
Incidentally, I agree with Majic . . . you're in charge of spider-killing. That's the man's job. 
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*** If you think your these things and not afraid to start a path of discovery, ***
This sounds almost a bit passive-aggressively angry; or at the least, condescending and antagonistic towards women. Consider deleting, "and not afraid to start a path of discovery". Also, "your" should be "you're".
_
Please give much consideration to deleting your entire blurb under "First Date." No one wants to read about the spellbound magic you and another woman felt for each other. It's simultaneously demeaning and has hints of nostalgic regret that you're not still with that particular women.
My late husband and I had a most fantastic first date, but it would be quite silly of me to make him the focus of my "First Date" section in my profile. That's what you did; you made another woman the focus of your "First Date" section. Who wants to be compared to a memory?
Also, "how exciting it is to finally see me" - regardless of whether or not she said this (and, I'm not doubting she did), this seems to be reverse arrogance; in that it seems you almost feel it necessary to mention to whomever's reading your profile that another woman was really into meeting you. Dating is not like a job interview; references really aren't necessary.
I have to get back to re-writing my own profile, now.
I hope this has helped.
~JLS | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 7:16:22 PM | I am SO happy that you are laughing OP. We are too, but only at you.
If you have even a remote possibility that you are funny, why don't you show some of that humor in your profile?
If "some butt hole" (Seriously? You just called some woman a butt hole? Wow.) doesn't catch your humor in your profile, would you really want to hang out with her? But a woman that might (and that is a HUGE stretch for me after reading your BS on this post) get your humor, that would be a big score for you. Score of a lifetime in your case.
Stop complaining about our comments dude. If you don't like them, don't USE THEM. You are really starting to annoy me, but as I have no life I will continue to F with you.
~passes OP some cheese to go along with his whine~
Edit: JLS - Maybe I should start attending church more than 2 times a year and possibly pay attention this time. I might become nice like you.
Naw. Mean is more better.
OP - a successful relationship in my most humble opinion would be like my parents. 55 years and still going strong. Hell, even I can go get a "lady" for one night. Might cost me a few hundred bucks, but it would be a night to be remembered. | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 7:25:57 PM | OK. Please take a deep breath and then slowly exhale.
I think you're getting a bit defensive and are not reading what some of us are actually writing.
I also think that you may be feeling insecure about all of this, which is why you seem to be so defensive throughout the thread (but, that's another topic, another thread). Relax. It's going to be ok.
For instance:
***Yah I can change that about my first date, but I don't agree about it being a failed relationship. That woman and I are very close, it was a sucess IMO. ***
If this was in reply to what I wrote in my first post (and since this response doesn't "fit" with anything the spider conversation that was taking place before I posted, I'm pretty sure you were responding to me) . . . nowhere did I refer to it as a "failed relationship." | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 7:29:46 PM | | Not defensive at all, sweetie. I just state my opinion, that's all. But yah I'm down if you wanna fix it, cause man. I think I redid it like four times now, but isn't love suppose to be easy, LOL | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 7:42:01 PM | *** If "some butt hole" (Seriously? You just called some woman a butt hole? Wow.) ***
I caught this, as well.
_
*** JoyLordStrength
If you want me to send you my profile description, and you can fix it that cool with me. I ain't probably ever gonna get it straight, I'm a diaster on paper I guess. ***
LOL - Well as attractive as that offer is, I'll have to decline. I need to get back to my own profile. And besides, since writing is a service that I provide via my business, if I were to do a complete rewrite, I would need your credit card information so that I could invoice you properly. 
Gavreel, you've been given a lot of good suggestions by several people in this thread. Instead of having a "comeback response" or a refutal to everything, why don't you, perhaps, take time a day to two to re-read through this thread and digest it a bit. You've argued every single point that has been made; and you have argued when someone points out that your being defensive. Do you see the connection between the two? You really are being defensive; otherwise, why argue everything that's posted?
I wish you many blessings, and I hope you find who you're looking for.
~JLS
_
***Edit: JLS - Maybe I should start attending church more than 2 times a year and possibly pay attention this time. I might become nice like you. Naw. Mean is more better. ***
Majic - you truly crack me up!  | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 7:57:49 PM | | I do appeciate all the attention and feedback, although I think I'mma just stay single. If I make my profile perfect, you women will just raise the bar on what perfect is and if I met that. You'll raise it again, till it's no longer 50/50.......... | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 8:16:06 PM |
I do appeciate all the attention and feedback, although I think I'mma just stay single. If I make my profile perfect, you women will just raise the bar on what perfect is and if I met that. You'll raise it again, till it's no longer 50/50..........
Hey it is tough out there any type of acheivement or progress takes work. Here is no exception. A lot of it has to do with being able to roll with the punches and come up with progress at the end of the day.
-Travis | |
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| Tell me the brunt truth, even if it painful! I'm curious
Posted: 11/4/2009 8:21:32 PM | OP - It has already come to every one's attention you are an attention seeking h0. Not one point that has been given to you (just like JLS clearly stated) has been thought about or implemented into your profile. "although I think I'mma just stay single"?
GOOD Choice!
Oh wait, I have a better idea. Swing by my house and I'll loan you one of my guns and you can go shoot yourself. I will however charge for the bullet.
JLS - Close your eyes.
Stop being a whiny ass **** and LISTEN or go away.
JLS - You can open your eyes again. | |
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