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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'      Home login  
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 a_chris79
Joined: 4/23/2009
Msg: 101
from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'Page 5 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
Cover your address with a finger.
Problem solved!
 startle
Joined: 7/22/2008
Msg: 102
from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/1/2010 10:28:18 PM
if a person does not develop a sixth sense about people they are going to pick badly over and over..that is dangerous....technology cannot fill in for an empty headed spacyness that just let's all kinds of clues pass right by....learn to listen closely, ask the right questions and the person won't even know you are evaluating them...also discriminating taste is vital...be observant...
 throwit2me
Joined: 6/23/2009
Msg: 103
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/1/2010 11:14:44 PM
Isn't the time honored practice to introduce a new someone to your friends, your family, and your dog? If they all think your new someone is trouble, there's a good chance they are right and if they all think the new person is golden then, the person is probably not trouble.

With face ids and lies and the rest, it's impossible to KNOW if someone is whom they purport to be, maybe they are in witness protection or are actually uncover agents for the CIA. HEY, it could happen. I just figure that if you are open to hearing what your friends have to say, they can be helpful.
 Eldrida
Joined: 11/13/2009
Msg: 104
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/1/2010 11:32:31 PM
Dated a POF guy before Christmas who offered me his Proof of Age card... I didn't ask to see it, and I can't remember what reason he gave but now I'm thinking he might want to have proved he was who he said he was, told me his last name, etc. In restrospect, it was really quite nice for him to do that.
 lets fish!
Joined: 11/21/2009
Msg: 105
from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/2/2010 2:01:12 AM
I had an ex have his police friend check my details after dating for 6 months.. he never so much as asked me if I had a background (I dont). I was offended as anything, if he wanted to check me out he shouldve asked my permission first.
 chrisofpa
Joined: 8/28/2009
Msg: 106
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/2/2010 3:13:53 AM

Also, if you know a realtor, they have reverse phone listings, i.e., the phone number gives the street address. Yikes!


411.com will do the same thing for reverse phone and reverse address searches. However, it is a little more difficult to find cell numbers.

and, no, I don't do this on dates. I do sometimes get calls on my cell where the caller id doesn't work well and I'd like to know who called
 bchgirl01
Joined: 10/28/2009
Msg: 107
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/2/2010 11:39:52 AM
Good for you babe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL
 **~renegadeoutlaw~**
Joined: 4/23/2006
Msg: 108
from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/2/2010 11:49:08 AM
Well......you can ask me all day long for my driver's license......not that this has ever happened to me......or write down the license plates to my vehicle.........

Where it will turn up..........the physical address and PO Box number to the post office of the city in which I reside. - and yes it IS my legal address and I get everything there as far as mail and correspondence. - it's easier that way.

Not only that.....but being a woman, alone, and who came out of a somewhat abusive relationship.......well......let's just say I certainly do NOT want my ex to show up on my doorstep because he decided to try to find me.

As far as a crimminal check.......well......I personally am clean yes, but you know......it doesn't hurt to be a bit cautious within this day and age with all the weidos around.

 Pirate Mollie
Joined: 7/21/2009
Msg: 109
from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/2/2010 12:02:26 PM
i am up shit's creek without a paddle since i don't have a car and i lost my driver's license. i don't know where its out. i think i left at some random guy's house.i don't think i should have sold my iphone for clothes. the clothes don't as well as they did. and my mom is still pissed at me. the woman can hold a fuking grudge like no one's business. forgive and forget are not her vocabluary.
 Tangled Line
Joined: 4/13/2009
Msg: 110
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/2/2010 2:30:45 PM
I have encountered some nightmare men, con types, who look okay nicely dressed etc...the phone portion went well, but I don't get into a car with a man, till I have seen his license and know more about him. When I meet someone for the first time I also tell someone else his name (first & last) and where we are meeting.
I know it all must sound paranoid to some, but I figure a good guy will understand and a jerk will show his colors. Its a catch 22 with not wanting a stranger to have your address. If you want me in your car or on the back of your bike...show me the license....
 farscapeprincess
Joined: 4/28/2008
Msg: 111
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/2/2010 3:14:20 PM
Dating is supposed to be relaxing, enjoyable and an opportunity to get know the person sitting across from you at the table; not some business proposition. Checking ID's? Are you for real? I'm not doing that for a stranger. HELL NO! The only time I do is because I have to -- for employment. I guess if you know a guy's last name you could verify his marital status to see if he's lying about it. But if someone wanted to know if I'm truly divorced, I have my divorce decree that I will gladly show since he doesn't have my curernt address on it, nor any other info like social security number. Have we all become that paranoid.
 barbee1970
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 112
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/2/2010 3:30:12 PM
Trouble is... I never asked to see his driver's license. 2 guys cost me cars.

Never again, nobody touches my car!
 S.O.U.L
Joined: 11/23/2009
Msg: 113
from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/2/2010 4:10:25 PM
Checking ID's? Are you for real? I'm not doing that for a stranger. HELL NO! The only time I do is because I have to -- for employment.


At least an employer tells you upfront that their doing the background check.

If you're asking for my Driver's License I'm going to assume you're either a Cop on Duty or you work for the bar/club (assuming this where we're located at the time) and you're doing a routine ID check. Otherwise you're not seeing my driver's license.

If you want to do a background check on me, be real and upfront about it and none of this shady business. I'll decide if I want to proceed with dating you at that point.

I have nothing to hide but I just not going to readily allow you to envade my privacy unless you're ready to do the same exact thing for me. With identity theft going on...I need to be just as wary as you.
 arwen52
Joined: 3/13/2008
Msg: 114
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/2/2010 9:55:36 PM
I've been tempted. So many guys lie about their age. I haven't done it yet, though.

I haven't done any sort of background checks but somehow I think going behind someone's back to check them out is at least equally as "offensive" (for lack of a better word) than asking for their driver's license.

What about asking to meet their friends?
 juliet88_10
Joined: 12/5/2009
Msg: 115
from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/3/2010 3:32:17 AM
LLLLLOOOOOLLLLLL

i never ask a guy for that BUT i do dont go to hes place if he ask me a mean i can chat with him for 1 month ....but i really dont know him plus if you go alone with him you have to take care of u self again is just better to go slow and be in the classic one "go to a public place" of curse if u dont planning to meet to have sex
 blondindian
Joined: 10/6/2009
Msg: 116
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/3/2010 3:33:27 AM
I have had several women ask me for my ID and in this day and age I cant say as I blame them Its not really paranoia when there are people in this world that would do you harm. Case in point ...Christmas day terroist bomb attempt-good family -good upbringing -good school-good job-NO CRIMINAL BACK GROUND and lo and behold HE was a still a NUT CASE.I dont have any thing to hide if you want to know just ask ,I've not been an angel my entire life but certainly no demon either, so it comes down to ...you show me yours and I'll show you mine.
 scorpiomover
Joined: 4/19/2007
Msg: 117
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/3/2010 3:35:21 AM
RE Msg: 6 by blueberrywaffles:
TIME would take care of most of the problem...dont' jump. Think. Wait. Ask intelligent questions. Then wait some more. The bottom feeders will make themselves known as a matter of course in time. You are already alone, so what is the rush?
Bingo. An excelled approach. Except that I would say that you are most likely to get far more from a person by simply listening than by asking questions, even intelligent ones. People love to talk about themselves if they are given people who are willing to listen to them. They'll happily tell you their life story without any prodding whatsoever.
 Montreal_Guy
Joined: 3/8/2004
Msg: 118
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/3/2010 10:16:39 AM
By the time I return to the dating world , I am expecting (at the minimum) a mutual full body pat down - in fact I am counting on it.

Can't be too careful these days.

Is that a bomb in your pants, or are you just happy to see me...
 Sharperchick
Joined: 9/10/2009
Msg: 119
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/3/2010 7:19:44 PM

i've read some women saying they will ask a man on a first meet to show his drivers license as an honesty test. i would not go for that. i have nothing to hide, but i do have a home to protect, and i don't know her well enough to be disclosing my address.

so my question is, what are some reasonable ways to verify that people are who they say they are, and what aren't? and on a side note, what lengths have people you've dated gone to to check you out?


I would never ask a man to show me his driver's license on a first date, and I'd get the h*ll outta there if he asked me.

Unless a guy has done something really suspicious, I just follow my gut. The men who can only talk during the day when they are at work, who after a couple of months of dating STILL don't want me to see their place - my gut tells me they are married or otherwise partnered, and I walk.

There was a guy I met from an online dating site (one time) who googled my username there, which was also one that I used to manage an online forum for my office. He camped outside my office for a few days to spy on me, ostensibly to make sure I really worked there.

I let him tell it to the men in blue.
 Wicked_Cricket
Joined: 9/26/2009
Msg: 120
from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 1/3/2010 7:39:41 PM
well it depends on the relationship. I guess I wouldn't need to see a driver's license on the first date - UNLESS he wants to drive me somewhere or drive my car. Absolutely nobody drives my car without checking out. NO EXCEPTIONS
And I won't get in a car with a guy who doesn't produce a driver's license, this just seems common sense to me. I don't write down his address but I do want to see it and I will check the date. And yes, this is necessary to me as someone who got stranded when some loser without a license got pulled over in the boondocks - WHY did I get stranded? Because I took it for granted that he was driving legally. This is a mistake I will NOT repeat, do not expect it.
 Tulips2010
Joined: 1/16/2010
Msg: 121
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 2/27/2010 10:23:33 PM
Davidpiano: Your information is updated every time you move. Whe you get a new sticker to put on your drivers license.. your address becomes public on white pages.. and possible a lot more.
 MrCloud
Joined: 7/18/2009
Msg: 122
from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 2/28/2010 4:15:19 AM
If someone ask for an ID from me, I expect them to have the same curtsey to show me theirs. If thats a problem for them, well, why should I show mine, just because I'm a guy? Misuse of information doesn't account of gender.
 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 123
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 2/28/2010 5:28:30 AM
drivers license sure, no problem i have nothing to hide, but my social insurance number never, or not until we are living together
i would think she was creepy, and it would be a bit of a red flag
 JRodriguez81
Joined: 2/24/2010
Msg: 124
from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 2/28/2010 4:09:05 PM
Im sorry but this could be just me and all, but I wouldnt be interested in a woman that feels the need to ask me for my drivers license or various other personal info on a first date.

That would creep me out.
 barbee1970
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 125
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from one dater to another: 'show me your drivers license, please'
Posted: 2/28/2010 4:16:36 PM
I never asked, trouble is, I find out later he's revoked, suspended, wants to borrow the car!
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