| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 7:25:35 AM |
can I get any advice on what she may be thinking?
She's thinking..."ha, I've hooked another sucker. One more soul for my Master."
Get out of there quick. She's never going to be there for you, you will always have to be there for her. You'll give...she'll take and take and take and....well, you get the picture. | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 7:31:31 AM | Young man.... all you need is two very powerful words to get what you need.
Come close so I can whisper what those two words are. Make sure you memorize them so you can say them exactly like I am about to, to her.
Closer....
Ok
Ready?
"FUK OFF". | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 7:31:36 AM |
"I got something I won’t tell, I won’t tell, I won’t tell..." *GAK*
Ha ha! Her role model for life is Cindy Brady!
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 7:48:35 AM | | Anyone else read the thread title and start singing "She's a brick...... house.." in their heads? | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 7:51:19 AM | | No, but I do find it ironic that he called the thread "She's a rock wall" and then proceeded to tell us he wants to climb up on her.... | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 7:57:01 AM | | Sounds like she either A.Wants to be **** buddys but you just ruined that telling her your feelings. OR B.She was going to tell you she got freaked out about the event and she cant see you anymore,And when u told her your feelings she paniced and couldnt tell you | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 8:10:37 AM | In a nutshell, her feelings toward you are flaky, she really is not falling for you/does not love you, you need to break it off and/or date other women, she will dump you eventually. Don't feel too bad about it... a large number of women her age are flaky, too immature to know what they want and not ready for a serious relationship.
Specifically, she approves of you and likes you as a freind.... which means you are doing some things very right, this is good and means you will be ready to make a go of things when you finally do meet the right girl who actually cares... but she is not it. She is taking advantage of your stronger feelings for her, you are enabling her to take you for a test ride. Because she has no real feelings of love for you, she has nothing to loose... but you do. Problem is, there is not enough real attraction for this thing to get off the ground. She is probably going to dump you when she exhausts all her testing and proves to herself that there really is no love possible on her end.
Don't let a women take you for a ride. | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 8:15:14 AM |
She likes you as a batter-on-deck, but not as a star hitter. She enjoys all the attention and stringing you along. That’s why she wanted to play “you tell first”; and then when you told her what she wanted to hear, she didn’t NEED to tell you anything, because she had you eaten out her hand once again. .
I get the feeling she`s looking for Sccc to commence and act like a man,what the heck do you think this gal is looking for? | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 8:31:51 AM | | recently I read another story similar to this, some of the comments here are not helpfull, for one put yourself into this guys shoes, damn you seem like a seriously decent guy with his head on the right way around. Your parents raised a good kid, now the not so good part, your are whipped, it's not a bad thing to devote yourself like you did but you are getting sod all back, do you really want a train wreck on your hands, just delete her no. or better still get a bew sim, ignore this b**ch and forget her, honestly you'll not be single for long. The title is simple plenty more fish in the sea and plenty of girls will go for a normal decent guy, but you have to get tough on yourself. Not saying treat women like ****es some may deserve that granted and this one does but you have to get your needs met, not saying sex or sexual needs, their a bonus but emotionally she has to meet you half way, she is a player and an evil vixen, she has major issues. Just bin her like an old tissue and move onwards and upwards. Guys be nice kid stuck his life story on line and some just sh*t all over it. | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 8:49:40 AM | Scc533, I read your original post and felt really sad for you. That you need to post this to ask our opinions on her tells me that you are seeking some form of validation to pursue her and some reassuring words that you will be able to break down her walls.
Have you always felt drawn to women with walls (aka serious intimacy issues?). You might want to ask yourself why you are (assuming this is the norm for you). | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 9:00:46 AM | Thank you all, especially HairyBear.
I think the point I have to put out is that I am fine with any of the possible results of this situation... I have dated a lot, lot of girls and the honest truth is that the vast majority of them I knew were doomed from the start and enjoyed them until they sputtered out and died. But every now and then I find myself really interested in someone, and the fact that I never lost feelings for her over a year and some months told me that there had to be a little more there. Also the fact that she came out of the blue, when there are plenty of other guys she could have played with, just makes me think there is something there.
I tend to be a decent judge of character, and I have learned some valuable skills in the 21 years of life I have lived and the 4 years of psychology education in particular. I think she is genuine... I think she is scared... I think she is a victim of her "flight or flight" response to emotional situations.
Do I want that in my life? Right now... well... I am okay with it, I understand both sides of what people are saying, But the truth is that I am choosing to stick this out because I think it is genuine.
My real dilemma is the choice to pursue her or sit back and see if she makes the move (since I made the last one by spilling my guts). If I get aggressive I could scare her off or lose her... if I sit back I could make her think I don't care or give her time to figure things out.
Oh man... I can't even lie, this part of life is so fun even if it's giving me grey hair ha. :] | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 9:05:38 AM | u know- i was going to try and be supportive-since u seemed genuine and sincere....but after reading ur final post-UR A FEKKING DOUCHE!!!!
u know good and well she's probably playing games with u-but i think u have the
"knight' complex....don't rescue her-leave her alone so she can work on her issues...god u even admitted u thought it would be fun even tho ur going to get grey hair out of it....maybe ur the trainwreck...god u make me sick!  | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 9:11:55 AM | | Ok firstly you are more than welcome mate, right you are going for this no matter what, you made your move a big big move she know where you stand on her, you don't sit it out now............... you could say in a simple txt not a chat, that I told you my feelings for you, I'm not into playing mind games it's your move now see you around you know where to find me don't make it too long I just may not be available." simple mind games back she commits and you make a go off it or she knows your gone again. There is no point in you making her excuses for her, you cannot know what she is playing at, we all know she is playing but they why's and if's are not clear. | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 9:13:39 AM | Sit back
Enjoy life as it is now
This shi* does not get any easier as you get older
The women just get crazier
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 9:22:57 AM | reelredhead
Joined: 10/21/2009
Msg: 39
view profile
History
Now were complete here!!! This really would be sweet if it were the redhead he was speaking of  | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 9:26:38 AM | OP... the redheads' communication skill sucks monkey juice.. it makes her a flake and gameplayer.. perhaps calling her on it would teach her a thing or two?
Would love to see the look on her face if you do.
My guess is she would gasp like the Home Alone kid
Tears would weld up like the Shrek pussycat then she storms out in a huff
proceeding to tell everyone 'what a jerk'
ack*..... no one is perfect eh? | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 9:37:14 AM | Okay, so, according to this last post, you're actively enjoying the head games.
This new information makes it possible to address your initial question of what she might be thinking.
She's thinking, "He's enjoying the head games, but he'd better step up and match wits with me pretty soon or I'm going to get really bored and have to find some other fool to brain-scramble."
Just a guess really, but, based on what you've put forth here, seems fairly likely. She may be practicing for a future husband.
Beware of people who push the pity button. They know they're doing it. They do it because it's effective in getting what they want. They don't care how it affects you. | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 9:38:26 AM | I see more the problem in that she likes you when you have a backbone and dislikes you when you turn into a mushy pile of noodles. When you're being the distant just a friend guy that hangs out and treats her as nothing more than a friend you're perfect for her. The problem comes when you "drop your guard" you become a different person. As you get older both sides will merge and you'll become yourself.
Looking at things from her side I see more of a defense mechanism in play. It appears that she really likes you but every time you open up and get close she runs away and hides. To me that is a lack of maturity. She's probably not ready for something serious. Especially in this day and age where the 'be young, have fun, you've got your whole life ahead of you, enjoy the college experience' mentality prevails. The easiest way for most people to control emotions is through distance. Feel yourself start to fall for someone you cut contact; notice they are falling too hard for you and you don't want to hurt them you cut contact.
My advice is to just go back to being how you always are. Treat her as the friend that she is. Then sometime when you're hanging out just the two of you, come out and ask her why she goes into hiding when you express feeling for her. Learn to talk things out. Find out directly from her what's going on. All of us forum people can make assumptions and analyze the living sh*t out of the situation but not a single one of us knows for certain what is going on in her mind. No relationship is worth pursuing if you can't talk openly with each other. | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 8:27:59 PM | Okay, so, according to this last post, you're actively enjoying the head games.
Agree with Helen, again.
This is going nowhere. | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/6/2009 11:30:17 PM | I can't really admit that I am enjoying the games them self... let me clarify.
The games are killing me, I will admit to being a fairly emotional guy, and the past week has been rough... It is the romantic interests being let down that sucks but over the year of liking this girl we just happened to become fairly good friends also. What sucks right now is not only the idea that I am being played with by a romantic interest but that someone who I considered a friend is also rejecting me.
I understand a lot of people are going to read this post and the previous ones and just think I am a little ****. That is fine if that is your opinion but who I am is someone I am not ashamed of. Of course it has gotten me hurt in the past, and the present, but it has also helped me make some of the most fantastic friends I could ever have.
With the girl... the feelings will fade, i'll always like her to a point especially because of the situation, but I understand that this is probably a lost cause. I see now that I should probably do some work on myself, my self esteem, and my own psyche. As I do that... maybe she'll "come back" be it just as a friend or maybe more. But if this time has proven anything to me... it's that I am not complete enough for someone to be with... not ready for a relationship of any kind (but especially with someone like this girl).
It is nice to see that my heart still works again at times... even if it is in such a tough way. | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/7/2009 12:04:35 AM | | She broke up with her boyfriend and doesn't have anybody serious right now. She's filling time with you. She gets a boyfriend, she'll appreciate all you've done, then move on. | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/7/2009 4:57:14 AM | You get into relationships that fail...over and over again.
do you, OP, really think this is a coincidence? You are NOT seeking out healthy relationships...otherwise, you'd find them. They surround you, as they surround us all.
There is something else you seek, and that's why you find these women you have to win over. You don't need to win the unwinable, in order to prove to yourself and others you are attractive to people. | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/7/2009 5:14:34 AM | | I'm curious, just ask her to marry you and see what she says. You like her, she says she's a virgin, what have you got to loose? If she says no, shes nothing but a game player. If she says yet, balls in your court! Start plannin' a wedding or tell her the truth, she's a virgin and you only want the goods with no commitment. Either way, you will get results. | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/7/2009 6:13:27 AM |
What sucks right now is not only the idea that I am being played with
I'd shed tears for you (not really) but, unfortunately, you previously stated:
I have dated a lot, lot of girls and the honest truth is that the vast majority of them I knew were doomed from the start and enjoyed them until they sputtered out and died
I'm sure one of your girls in the past had a genuine passion for you but you played them.... I'm guessing you were also playing behind their backs because of the inevitable ending you played out in your mind.
Now, karma has returned in the form of a red head with blue eyes.
It looks good on you. | |
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| She's a rock wall...
Posted: 11/7/2009 9:26:50 AM |
I'm sure one of your girls in the past had a genuine passion for you but you played them.... I'm guessing you were also playing behind their backs because of the inevitable ending you played out in your mind.
Now, karma has returned in the form of a red head with blue eyes.
It looks good on you.
You just may be right sir... I don't deny that. No one is perfect. | |
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