| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 11/25/2005 1:11:50 AM | Hey tallykatt
Most of us (like me) will think you've agreed to come back to the pad to give at least a *little* action. Doesn't mean full on sex, but something. The message we'll pick if you go home with us (or maybe just me)up on is that you're kind of ready to go.
Sex on the first night ruins nothing. How can you know whether someone will be compatible in a relationship iof you haven't slept with them? The sex might end up being bad every time, and then you're involved with someone who doesn't cut it.
If I was the guy you went home with ( let a guy have his fantasy  ) you ideally would make out, get your top off. Anything less would be really frustrating. Remember (hypothetically) you're the one that came back to the pad after drinks and dancing. A real turn on would be, well, sex. An aggressive woman is the shiznit.
And you are making a generalisation by thinking a guy won't call you if you have sex with him. There's guys that go to bars just to get laid and do as many girls as they can. Not all of us are like that.
And personally I don't think you'll meet *any* quality people at a bar or club. They're meet markets. Lots of ho's. Male and female. There's better ways to meet people. | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 11/25/2005 1:33:47 AM | If I meet a man from a bar, I don't put myself in the situation that I even go back to his house or vice versa. I give him my number and tell him to call me, we can do dinner. If he calls, then he's interested in something more than a quick fix. If he doesn't, then he's solved my problem for me.
Simple. | |
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S.W.S
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Joined: 8/3/2004
Msg: 128 | |
| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 11/28/2005 10:56:16 PM | | Live and let Live that is what I say! Emotians are a difficult subject. You sound like a very smart women should I start running. Ha Ha I have to say being a man it sucks somtimes being kind to women , same scenario. Your in controll find it if you want it. And take it if you need it. | |
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LL3
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Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 129 | |
| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 11/28/2005 11:01:29 PM | | I am a guy...and I'll be very honest as to how "some" of us think.....I read the opening line, have seen how pretty you are and a lot of guys would love to "hook" up with you....To sound crass....give it up to soon, all hopes of a relationship are gone.....I"m not talking me or my fellow mates in specific....but really.....we'd like to get to know you as well.....if it's a one sided affair, that's pretty much it... | |
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JDLeon
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Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 130 | |
| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 11/29/2005 12:04:32 AM | i can't fking believe this.
you are 29 and you still go to club. You go to a guy's place but not expect to have sex with him. You think having sex would make the guy dont call. lol too funny.
here is my advice:
if you want a serious relationship. dont go to the club. | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 11/29/2005 1:39:23 AM | Number 1 rule - anywhere , anytime...if you dont want to have sex you dont have to
every adult, male and female, under the sun, could get worked up in that situation...but if you dont wish to proceed any further just say so. Its up to both adults to behave responsibly. S---xual disappointment/ frustration doesnt only happen to men, it happens to females as well. In a way it can be fun to stop ,start, stop and build up the tension between you over a while i fyou intend to date a while. Just make sure you are clear BEFORE you get into those situations and tell them in future BEFORE you start kissing and making out you dont intend to have sex. If either of you change your mind down the track then say so, but remember the other one always has the right to say no and that it goes both ways. That's including for men. [ Yes men do say "no" also ]
But if you are really worried about those situations dont go home alone with men you dont know ...and with whom you dont have some kind of idea how you both interact together
Cheers !! | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 11/29/2005 3:01:12 AM | | Depends on the man what goes through his head. As far as feeling guilty of working him into a horny frenze don't be unless you were also pawing at him. As far as sex on the first night, I would have to say, even though one night stands can be great that is all they are one night stands. Hope this helps you out a bit. | |
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Tinkle
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Joined: 11/2/2005
Msg: 133 | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 12/2/2005 9:30:28 PM |
In responce to sunfishone2001 I have to wonder sometimes if people like you have any friends..... Please befor replying READ All the information..
Yeah? Well you spelled response wrong. How do you like them apples? | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 12/8/2005 11:19:22 AM | I know that women believe that men won't have a relationship with a woman who has sex with him on the first date.
I personally don't believe that. I think men fall in love too and if she is the "right one" then he will be calling her right away whether she had sex with him or not....
There are men that are out there trying to fill up a score card...but I would hope you would see through that bull long before the trip to his house.... | |
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sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 137 | |
| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 12/8/2005 1:13:46 PM | I wish that has happened to me but with a woman , ... I can dream , they are free anyhow.
Yup alot of women do go to clubs to find relationships with the same guy all chicks screw with , guys look to get laid , best place to find women otherwise it is agonizingly hard unless you pay for a hooker | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 12/8/2005 1:31:50 PM | I'm still trying to figure out how to get a girls phone # . I go out to a club here in town sometimes on Friday night sometimes on Saturday. I might end up talking to one or two girls and have even danced with a few but then i forget to ask for a # or some tupid thing like that. I'm not there looking to get laid that night but basically to meet someone to talk to or dance with and maybe even meet up with them some other time just to chat and see if theres anything worth pursueing.
I need to get a clue and maybe not drink so much.
Ladies there are guys like me out there that are just looking to dance and have fun and not rush things . So if you see me some where then give me your # and tell me you'd like me to call otherwise i might never know!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 12/8/2005 1:34:10 PM |
What should she do?
Leave, if she's not interested in just sex.
Sex on the first night? Does this ruin a possible relationship?
Sex on the first night doesn't ruin a relationship but it was pretty obvious this guy wasn't interested in that. He lead her on, plain and simple. He's weak and not worth a relationship.
If you were the guy in this situation, what should she do? What would turn u on the most?
If I was the guy in this situation and I just wanted to get laid, she'd know exactly what she was coming back to my apartment to do. If I was interested in her, we'd watch the movie then go to sleep.
And if she does give in ....... why does he not call??????
As I said above, she got played and she shouldn't have given in if she didn't want just sex. | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 12/8/2005 3:11:58 PM | If I was the guy in the scenario, I wouldn't have a problem with keeping the heat down! I might ask "are you sure?" but if it's a no-go and we end up not going at it, I'll still for sure call her and get her for a date!
I'd be less likely to ask for a second date if we did it... But then, I wouldn't do it on the first night we met anyways.... even if she was as hot as you in that cowboy hat! | |
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sddude
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Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 141 | |
| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 12/8/2005 3:47:52 PM | | I am celibate , women in bars still will not give me thier numbers normally , if by a miracle I ge to dance with one , still not easy to get a number , too beneath them I guess , yeah that is how I think womenin this site see me , beneath them , yeah you too. | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 12/8/2005 4:01:20 PM | This is too funny ....and kudos to "ladydi8"
If you meet a guy and you go to his place on the same day/evening..or at least how you described itn...well what do you think the guy expects???.....to polish his floors..duh duhb]
first of all u took 1 hell of a stupid risk by going there..I am still baffled @ how stupid women can be...I mean he could have been wacko and you on the news next day and his face on Americas Most Wanted a few months after...
If you sleep with a guy the 1st time u meet him....don't expect him to respect you
A guy will think " if she does that with me ..then she does it with everyone"..
So...if ur fine with that kinda casual sex thing..go ahead...don't expect a phonecall the next day & if u do get one.....it is 99% for the same thing..........OR maybe he really does wan't you to polish his floors...... | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 12/8/2005 4:17:17 PM | Absolutely have to agree with rockwell. The vast majority of guys at clubs are there for not only sex, but for trophies, games, and to feed their own egos.
In my experience, women who agree to sex on the first night will probably lose my respect and I likely wouldn't call until the next time I wanted non commital sex if at all. (This has only happened twice in my life anyway)
If I meet someone at a club, and they are still interested after the charm of their alcohol buzz has worn off, and in the light of day, I am more likely to stick around and explore the deeper possibilities. | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 3/22/2006 1:46:56 AM | First off she made a bad choice in going back to his place. unless she knows she wants sex. she doenst know if he is a nice guy or if he is a drunk player that isnt going to take no for an answer.
As for sex on the first date...this wasnt a date..this was going out clubbing and getting lucky and is a hook up nothing more...she shouldnt expect a call back. He might call if he is interested but if he just wanted sex then he has had it and wont call.
There is that problem of when is it too soon or too late for sex...have it too soon then he might just be in it for sex and if it doesnt happen he might give up.
For women it would be best to assume that the guy is wanting to get laid when he askes you home after the club. he might say he isnt but he is probably thinking he will just charm you or the booze in your system will change your mind.
If she really likes him then she should just tell him not tonight we just met...when she leaves she can let him know that she really does like him and why not ask him out for another day?
Just because he is hot and horny doesnt mean he has to have it and she has to give it to him. He wont die. And if he gets mad then thats all he wanted...if he is interested in the girl he will be looking forward to the next meeting.
She should never feel guilty..he was the one working himself into the frenzy. But she should realize that going to a guys place after the bar she has to expect him to paw her. If she wants a date to watch a movie she should just give him her number and say she is free the next night and would love to see the video..at 2:30 am its not the time to start a date. If he doesnt call then she knows he wasnt interested in her but just sex.
Any guy that is really interested isnt going to need sex the first meeting! | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 3/22/2006 9:29:54 AM | I know it's been said before in this thread, but if you want more then a one night stand, DO NOT accept offers to go home with the guy! Big no no in my book. And frankly, not even safe, You could have been raped. You don't know this guy! Take time to know him. If he was really interested in you he's ask you for a date on another night or at least just your phone number.
As a guy that met his second wife in a night club, I will tell you this. I know she was more then a quick roll in the hay. She had class. I was immediately attracted to her. I danced with her all night. Then I asked her out for another night. She accepted. The rest of the story is we fell ion love and married. BTW, she passed away in 1984 after 10 years together.
So no, gentlemen do not ask a lady to go home with them on the first night unless they expect to get laid. So as a gentleman, I NEVER asked a lady to go home with me either.
Now if I figured her to be the one night stand type, that's another issue. *wink* | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 4/5/2006 10:58:08 AM | What should she do?
Sex on the first night? Does this ruin a possible relationship?
If you were the guy in this situation, what should she do? What would turn u on the most?
And if she does give in ....... why does he not call??????
Tell him you like him, you don't want to ruin things, by getting intimate right off the bat, and want to wait...all good things are worth waiting for.
No it doesn't ruin a possible relationship, however, not everyone is the same...know your audience...alot of people seem to feel if they get intimate first date, then it's not relationship material...personally i disagree...If i like you enough to be intimate, then I'm willing to explore the possibilities, I don't mind waiting though.
If I was her...and I've been in this situation before, I would say that I really liked him, that I would love to see him again and that I don't want to ruin things by rushing in, also that I really want to but, I think we should wait...all good things are worth waiting for...now if a man isn't prepared to hold back after being asked to...then he really isn't the one for you.
What would turn me on the most? Probably whispering in my ear the things you would like to do...sometime in the future...would get my imagination going and drive me nuts...
If you give in, well...if you're a poor judge of character, then perhaps you erred...however...its 2000+ don't wait for a call...call him...i think you'll see quite quickly where this will lead.
Hope it helps...
Herv. | |
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| Guys at bars...
Posted: 4/6/2006 9:17:43 AM | | Well...was the guy drinking heavily himself?....were you? I know the bar scene can get crazy at times... I don't think sex on the first date is good... because that would give me the impression that sex is all you wanted... Maybe some heavy petting... enjoy the vibe... because face it... attraction strikes a chord in a male... little humour there. | |
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| Guys i need your help.... let us girls in on your huy stuff
Posted: 4/6/2006 7:46:04 PM |
ROCKWELL: the thing is that most guys see clubs as places to get laid-- not start relationships-- so if you meet one there and go home with him chances are he is going to take it as a given that the two of you are going to have sex.
personally i wouldn't go to a club if i was looking for someone to have a serious relationship with. the whole atmosphere of a club-- from the alcohol being served to the types of music that get played-- is geared towards sex; it's not the type of place one is easily able to show off, or notice, the characteristics that make a good long term (as in anything over a 1 nighter) partner.
Excellent Reply!!! | |
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