| | Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?Page 11 of 18 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18) | Someone who hasn't married and hasn't had children shouldn't be seen as a red flag. To automatically assume there is something wrong with them; or they are selfish, commitment phobes or having over all personal issues, is a pretty outlandish judgement.
If we were going to go with that train of thought; I guess we could assume those with multiple kids and multiple marriages/baby daddys are impulsive, irrational and need someone in their life in order to feel validated. That they think of themselves as failures unless they reproduce. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 1:09:40 PM | | It is not complicated peeps. If a woman accuses me of being a red flag because I have never married and I don't have children that is a good problem to have. It means that woman is a red flag and I should run the other direction. I probably would be tempted to send a thank you card for avoiding such a train wreck. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 1:18:46 PM | | I hope that me never being married and no kids does set off some red flag for some people. It will be a good indication of who I should stay away from. Yes, HUGE RED FLAG. Knowing how to use birth control and avoiding a divorce. Put me on an island with the other misfit toys please. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 1:25:05 PM | I hope that me never being married and no kids does set off some red flag for some people. It will be a good indication of who I should stay away from. Yes, HUGE RED FLAG. Knowing how to use birth control and avoiding a divorce. Put me on an island with the other misfit toys please.
It's nice when they self-filter, isn't it? | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 1:37:29 PM |
It's nice when they self-filter, isn't it?
Absolutely. Makes you wonder though. If not having kids or been married is a red flag, what is being married multiple times and having lots of kids by all different people? There's some guy that has over 30 kids in the news in the last month or so. Not a red flag at all. But having no kids/no marriage is horrible. We non-kid/marriage types really need to have some kind secret charm or sign language so we can spot each other out in the wild. I think it should be "pull my finger?" cause that's probably why we're single to begin with. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 1:44:05 PM |
There's some guy that has over 30 kids in the news in the last month or so
It's not a red flag, it's a tactic; it's called "comfortable retirement at a latter date"..........
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 4:01:16 PM | | I guess there are a lot of stupid people out there for not being married.That includes me,i am trying to figure out how becouse we have never been married makes us stupid, angry and none commital.It raises a big red flag when i hear people talk like the way they do. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 4:31:28 PM | | Im working with a guy who is 55 and absolutley gorgeous..he's never been married and I dont think has kids.. RED FLAG! ..remember I said he's gorgeous with Robert Redford movie star looks, great shape, great personality etc., etc., so yes Big Red Flag (no he's not gay either) | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 4:39:07 PM | I say .. the BIG RED ONE would be anyone that would name themselves a CLOWN FISH and thinks that her farts in her panties are WHISPERS !
"""" The Clownfish: You found me, now what's your other 2 wishes """"" ....and it is .... what ARE your other 2 wishes ! ..lol ...;-)) | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 4:41:44 PM |
Im working with a guy who is 55 and absolutley gorgeous..he's never been married and I dont think has kids.. RED FLAG! ..remember I said he's gorgeous with Robert Redford movie star looks, great shape, great personality etc., etc., so yes Big Red Flag (no he's not gay either)
I don't see this as a red flag........However he could very easily be considered a genius! It took me awhile but after having raised my children and two divorces...........marriage has as much appeal as going to prison. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 5:03:40 PM | I will probably get shot down for this, but in my experience the reason that I tend to shy away from guys who have never had kids, is the lack of understanding of the place my kids have in my life. When the kids were younger, I dated a few guys who never had kids, but were child rearing experts and spent a lot of time telling me how to raise my kids. Funny thing was that the guys with kids weren't nearly as full of "good" advice.
Now that the kids are grown, the only man that I dated without kids, resented if I didn't always put him first, such as the time I cancelled a date because my daughter had hurt her ankle and I went to take care of her. His response was she is a grown up, can't she take care of herself. So for me not so much a red flag as a need to make clear that the kids are still near if not on the top of the priorty list. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 5:19:38 PM | *Perhaps I'm alone in this. Never been married- sensible! No kids- wise! But the indication of lack of commited relationships in general is big RED FLAG territory. *
And that's retarded. What if the lack of a committed relationship is only due to the fact that I don't want to deal with someone else's kids, and refuse to take a relationship to that level, if they have kids? The poster above makes one of my points. Her kid comes first. Her kid is not my kid, so I couldn't care less. I'm gonna be second place, I'll put her second place as well...to my dog, car, buddies, or whatever. THEN, we'd be even. But, obviously we wouldn't get anywhere.
Hmmm. So I could tell a FWB, 'lets make it serious' and technically I've had a relationship. I could also get a FWB pregnant, then technically I've had a kid. Those will make me dateable, right?
Also, I'm not offended, I just fail to see the logic that baggage is better. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 5:24:13 PM | How narrowminded and presumptious of you. What does lack of commited relationship have to do with people who have kids? There are plenty of women who don't. If you have reached a ripe age and yet to experience a commited relationship then that is a little suspect!
The obessision with being 'second place' smacks of insecurities also!
As I've said- kids aren't a factor for me. If you say you have never been in a long-term relationship though, I'm going to wonder why. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 5:35:46 PM | Kids were mentioned, because they are my reason for never having been in an LTR. Overwhelming amount of women have them, and I don't date them.
Me being second place isn't a problem. its part of the basis of a FWB relationship; things happen when you make time, everything else takes precedence, on either side.
Trying to have a real relationship with women who is going to expect for me to put her first, while she does not, is a clear double standard. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 5:42:38 PM | ~~~~~~~~~
Kids were mentioned, because they are my reason for never having been in an LTR. Overwhelming amount of women have them, and I don't date them.
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So,.. you don't date single mothers.. ok.. so how are they then the reason for YOU not having a LTR? If you don't date them.. and you date.. then we can only surmise that the reason you don't have a LTR has something to do with yourself. Unless of course you just don't date period, which one can surmise many things from that statement as well. but as you posted.. you do date..soooo.. it comes back to YOU.
To to answer OP: No.. not being married and being child-free is not a red flag.. having never had a long term, committed relationship is. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 5:43:03 PM | Are you telling me you can't establish, and never have been able to, a long-term relationship with a woman? The kids factor is a moot point really- there are plenty of women out there single, free and datable who do not have kids.
If women with kids aren't an option, fair dos. I respect that, it's a lot of baggage/ issues/ general shite. However, my post was purely in reference to men who have never been in a serious relationship. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 6:02:49 PM | | What does being in a serious relationship mean? Does it mean you can,t commit NOT.I know people who have been in commited relationships before and they have been married two and three times...real mature.I am not afraid to commit to a relationship at all.If i get labeled a bad person for not ever being married or forhildre not having kids so be it.Being married to me means forever,thick or thin,good and bad.Just becouse a person has been married doesn,tmake them a better person and anyone can have kids | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 6:09:37 PM | I don't personally see several marriages as a red flag- who are we to judge on face value the reasons for a relationship breakdown. It's not necessarily a reflection on the individuals capabilities to uphold a relationship.
Serious relationship to me means living together at least. It's not really about marriage as such. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 6:17:59 PM | | Thats right who are we to judge a person who has been in a few relationships but people don,t seem to mind judging people who have never lived together or been married or have kids so maam please don,t judge me for not having a child or lived with anyone or married.Who are you or any one else here to say waht kind of person i am or anyone else that has,t been married | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 6:20:44 PM | I never really lived with someone either.. but was with a man for 4 years and another for 3.. the first guy did sorta live with me.. at my mothers for a short while.. but he's also the reason for most of things on my "red flag" list. lol..
Playful pete don't worry.. maybe you're my prince? you're not a felon are ya?? lol | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 6:22:01 PM | | I think it would be silly to say we don't all make our own judgements, as is our perogative. I personally don't see relationship breakdown as anything to be overly concerned by, probably because it happens all the time and something the majority of people experience. Quite an important life experience too I feel! If you've not had a serious relationship whatsoever, I will wonder why. | |
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| Never been married, no kids. Is this a red flag?
Posted: 6/14/2012 6:31:07 PM | | @confuzzeled4ever...yes i am a felon,i stole candy from my neice.She didn,t need the candy...LOL.Just like people put up red flags for people who have never been married and no kids.There are people who will say that being married multipal times is a sign of not being commited | |
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