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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 5/21/2008 4:42:22 PM | Even when a person does look like their picture, there may sometimes be no chemistry or they may not be what you imagined.
I try hard to keep the conversations to a minimum so that if we meet and I don't feel attracted or vice versa no one gets let down. I like to have a few conversations to find out if we are both looking for the same thing and to make plans but I save the longer conversations for our actual dates. | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 5/21/2008 9:30:42 PM | Yeh, I had this happen on the VERY first meeting I had off this site (the only site I've ever been on, this creates enough chaos, who needs an xtra dating site? LOL)!
I will be 100% honest though, she had no pic up AND she did say she was a "little overweight" when I first talked with her, but THAT in itself was lowballing me in my humble opinion LOL. Anyways, we talked on the phone for what was about 2 weeks (my first ever online date experience) and I had no pic to go off, I did like the way things were progressing conversation wise, HOWEVER, I stressed to her that physical activity in a relationship with me is VERY important, she said she could handle that (course that could mean anything depending on who's saying that lol).
Anyways, the night of the date came, we were going to meet in exactly one hour outside the theatre and then we would go in/get our food/watch the movie. Our conversation was going great then JUST as we were about to say goodbye she says to me "I should tell you that I'm not only overweight but some guys have seriously run away from me screaming after they see me walk up for the date", WHAT!!!!!! Then suddenly she says "see you at the theatre!" and hangs up. Man was I pissed off HAHAHAHA, YES I liked her for WHO she was, but really, that's something she clearly believed might be an issue so why did she wait till just before we were about to go on our date?
So anyways, I talked to my sister about it before heading out and she says "she could be overexaggerating" and I said "yeh your right, probably nothing to worry about" HAHAHAHA, yeh right!!! I was standing outside the theatre and I saw her ..... I had hoped and prayed out loud that I was mistaken and it wasn't really her, but damnit it was .... she looked like the Michelin Man (sp?), the big white guy in the tire commercials, all puffy EVERYWHERE and walking like it too, she comes towards me and there was cold blooded fear running through every vein in my body!!! Anyways, to make a long story a little shorter, I stuck it out on the date and let her know at the end that although I did enjoy the movie and our conversation, physically we just weren't meant for one another. End of story.
So yeh, there are liars about their physical being going around out there, no question ..... | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 5/21/2008 11:00:53 PM | I've only met four men from POF in person. Two didn't look much like their photos. They were barely recognizable. One looked better than his photo and we dated casually for a brief period. The fourth one didn't have a photo, just a written description of what he supposedly looked like. I was very pleasantly surprised and attracted to him when we met. After 4 months, we're still together and it's getting better every day. | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 5/26/2008 5:47:08 AM |
@nembatha: why don't you try reading the whole thing next time before you jump in with your judgements. I also said he was a different race. It had nothing to do with the weight, I could have accepted him if he had been honest with me upfront. He has a picture of a WHITE guy on his profile, and he was clearly INDIAN.
So how am I shallow? If someone contacted you and said they were a certain ethnicity, and you met and they were CLEARLY not, how would you react? And no it doesn't matter what race he is, but the fact that he lied to me and I had the image of a white guy.
As for saying I can stand to lose a hundred pounds myself, that is not physically possible without ending up in the hospital on an IV for malnutrition, you halfwit. I am 5'8" about 180lbs. You do the math. There is no need for your remarks, grow up. You sound like the type who would do what this guy did, maybe that's why you're defending him?
Everyone else, thanks for your support. It means a lot to me that there are kind people out there who take the time to share their thoughts.
OH MY GOD!!! ppl get over it, LOOKS COUNT! Im not saying everyone has to be a stunner, but Christs sake, we all have our preferrences, not everyone has the same definition of beauty, but never-the-less we all have our preferrences. Im going to misquote "Liar Liar" and say "Its only ugly people who say that its whats on the inside that counts". Quit raggin' on this woman who was lied to by an onviously disgusting skeezeball. He deserves to be trolling POF FOR YEARS lol. Ps, yes I will get old and baggy and quite possibly rotund, but when I do I will still have a preferrence...it will just be for the Robert Redford/Sean Connery types...so there
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 5/26/2008 6:04:02 AM |
Forum after forum seems to deal with one key issue ..... Honesty. If you read CityKitty's post objectively it is dishonesty that has upset her. It humors me yet saddens me how critical and absurd some replies are. Some seem to be dishonest with themselves. It would seem that looks to them matter not at all. I question their honesty. How about if we line them up with a box with arms, legs, and opposite sex parts? I guess they'd be thrilled. So the same ones will point out over and over again how shallow another is for only wanting honesty. My honest opinion is that the name callers or those who want to label the rest of the world as "shallow," must have reached nirvana.
Throw all the insults you will at me, but in CityKitty's defense, I will say this: Although I am attracted to more of what is on the inside, I still have to be honest with myself and say that I want to have some attraction for the outward appearance also. Oh vain and shallow me. At least the rest of the world can appreciate my honesty in that. I've been burned myself by fake photos a couple of times. Here's what it is in a nutshell that CityKitty has already addressed. The time spent with phone calls and getting to know a person are personal investment as to their future. It is a fraudulent usage of another person's time if you are so flagrantly misrepresenting yourself. I see one of the most important factors of a solid relationship as having a firm foundation of trust. The trust issue is already null and void when you meet that person and they have totally misrepresented themselves. Have you ever thought of that one, oh name callers of the earth?
CityKitty, you are totally right on in your feelings, you were lied to and cheated out of your own time and probably some money too.
now why didnt I have the tact to say it that way? Ive gotta work on that lol | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 5/26/2008 6:13:23 AM | | This is why I meet people right away now!!! I've had my heart broken after months of chatting on the phone, only to meet and be totally confused because there is no chemistry and attraction, and the man in question wasn't unnatractive, he just wasn't for me!! Meet right away I say...then if there is no chemistry, nobody is hurt!!! | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 5/26/2008 8:30:05 AM | i have had this happen to me as well, not a great way to start a potential relationship, with a lie, like sure, i will look past you lied to me before i even met you and continue to trust everything you tell me..run away, fast, lots of fishies out here | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 5/29/2008 3:26:14 AM | | Well i understand with the fact that he lied to you. See you "not attracted to him anymore" so is it his fault that he try to give him self and advantage. I understand that he lied and that should not be accepted. But if he is a nice guy and sweet the attraction factor will kick in. I just think he lied in order for him to even receive a chance, you can sort of say a FIGHTING SHOT. | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 5/29/2008 5:06:47 AM |
this one must've been part nudist...cause half hour after he got here he was naked....not as a mutual thing
First - you met a guy, for the first time, in a place where he could get nude? Good Lord girl, you're asking for horrible trouble!
Second, if the pic is really not of this guy, you should let POF know. | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 5/29/2008 5:07:03 AM | | I think sometimes it is hard to deal with the fact that we like ppl simply for their looks, we aren't Gods, so to becalled shallow ontop of going through that is clearly unfair. Although i once set my mate up with a girl i met and when he met her 2 months later after fallingin love with her on the phone she turned out to beway huger then i remembered andshe was sort of devil worshiping. Go figure that one out. | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 7/3/2008 9:48:10 PM | | Sadly it works both ways. I think if they look better than picture acceptable. Some folks take bad pictures. If that are not even close that is wrong. It has happened to me and it is very akward and you end feeling like the loser. | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 7/4/2008 2:27:32 AM | Hi citykitty,
I would tell him you don't want to see him anymore because he didn't look the least bit like his picture. I wouldn't try and warn anyone else,firstly because someone might still accept him,and secondly,if no-one else accepts the false photo ,then he will eventually get the message. | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 7/4/2008 6:44:01 AM | Welcome to internet dating (LOL) You will encounter this a lot unfortunately. I use to be so surprised when I would meet women and they were absolutely stunned that I looked like my pic. Later they would mention that most guys they met did not look like their pic. Even better was the fact that they felt I looked even better in person than my pic...which is always nice to hear  As far as talking to someone for weeks and into the wee hours, I have never been a fan of that. I would rather meet sooner than later and then determine if it is more a relationship or friendship connection in person versus on the telephone or computer. I know some people would prefer meeting later than sooner, but if you have nothing to hide I do not see the big deal. In the beginning you are just "friends" (if you can call it that) anyway so it is just like meeting a new person at work or in the grocery store...difference is you just happened to initially meet them online. Lastly, to me if they lie to you from the start and they do not even know you...you can expect many many more lies as the relationship continues. | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 7/4/2008 7:42:16 AM | ~CityKitty~, though i am sorry that you was lied to, but in my experience (being overweight), admitting it, is like inviting every woman on the site to treat us like we are infected with the black plague and it can be very annoying.
When alot of overweight people can be very sweet and kind and everyone is avoiding them and go with the slim person in front of them or next to them, who in some cases, treat them like crap.
Hell, its even annoying that its a requirement to have a pic to just chat to someone, i mean its just chatting, if you need a pic to just chat, then you must be really hooked on how someone looks. | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 8/2/2008 11:08:56 AM | I AGREE WITH trkdrvr330c. if they are not truthful in their looks just think of all the other things they could be lying about. I had this happen to me 1 time a couple of years ago he said he was 6 ft. tall and had dark hair and we arranged to meet at applebee's for a drink and i took my sister-in-law with me which he agreed was ok. I walked in and looked around and saw no one that matched his description AND I LOOKED AT THE BAR AND THERE WAS A LITTLE BALDHEAD MAN WHO WAS PROBABLY 2 INCHES SHORTER THAN ME WHICH I AM 5 FT. 2 1/2 INCHES MYSELF. I WALKED OVER TO HIM AND INTRODUCED MYSELF AND HE SAID HI AND THE BARTENDER ASKED US WHAT WE WANTED TO DRINK AND MY SISTER-IN-LAW SPOKE UP AND SAID SEX ON THE BEACH AND THAT THE GUY WAS GOING TO PAY. HE GAVE THE BARTENDER MONEY AND WALKED OUT THE DOOR NO SORRY NO GOT TO GO OR ANYTHING . THEN HE HAD THE NERVE TO CALL ME LATER THAT EVENING AND TRIED TO APPOLOGIZED CAUSE I WAS DRESSED AND LOOKING GOOD HE WAS EMBARASSED. I TOLD HIM THAT IF HE HAD OF BEEN HONEST WITH ME WHAT HE LOOKED LIKE WAS NO PROBLEM. I TOLD HIM THAT I DID NOT WANT A RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE WHO COULDN'T BE HONEST. JUST DON'T GIVE UP CITYKITTY HE IS OUT THERE SOMEWHERE. I HAVEN'T GIVEN UP HOPE YET.. .. .. | |
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| So, I met this guy and he looked NOTHING like his pic!!
Posted: 8/2/2008 11:25:20 AM |
I guess this woman was also lying then that she truly liked this guy for him.Again,looks fade but inner substance is forever.
I wouldn't say that at all. This person totally misrepresented and lied about himself from the very beginning- what kind of foundation is that? What else is he lying about?
When people see others that they are attracted to and begin the communication cycle we begin to build expectations. While sometimes those expectations may be unrealistic I don't think that's the case here. She expected to see the guy that she began to like in her pictures. What I don't get is why do people post pictures that don't look like who they are? As she stated it's not like we are not going to notice when we go on the date with you. I myself am attracted to women of many shapes, but when I believe the woman looks one way and then meet her and she looks much different it always tends to leave me with a bad taste in my mouth- even if I would have been attracted to her as she is in the beginning.
I think if people truly represent themselves how they are they will be pleasantly surprised to find out there are people out there who will like them as they are. Especially when they display the confidence in themselves that they should have. | |
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