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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?      Home login  
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 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 51
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She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?Page 3 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
I don't get the drama, he's your friend and he's appartently kind of dumb, so you say you heard she's a gold digging bytch from hell who tries to trap guys by faking a pregnacy and getting money. He's says, Huh? and you both go about your day. You've warned him, he's too to care and life goes on. All you can do is report your gossip, you can't make him not be a dumbass.
 NowSucksLess
Joined: 2/4/2010
Msg: 52
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/23/2010 4:43:35 PM
There are times when we need to learn our own lessons..perhaps this is one of the lessons he needs to learn.


True, but Rock Hunter has the Cliff Notes.
 Arabianangel
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 53
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/23/2010 5:00:10 PM

True, but Rock Hunter has the Cliff Notes.


True..but what's the point of theory when you can't put it into practice? Theory brings awareness, but it doesn't enhance your growth nor does it bring actual change. If this man is as the OP puts it "easy prey" or "inexperienced" all the theory in the world won't change a thing in him. He needs to learn his own lessons, sometimes even falling off that cliff.

Anything that doesn't kill you only makes you stronger, right?
 whenwillthiswork26
Joined: 11/13/2008
Msg: 54
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She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/23/2010 5:46:38 PM
Oh please!

She had a miscarriage, she has debts, and her mother is saying their money
problems are over.
What cave have you been in where these things aren't part of life?

Who cares if she wants his money or not. If she makes him happy and he
loves her that's all that matters. It certainly isn't your job to head off every
woman who he is with just because she might want his money.

If she doesn't get him, someone else will.

How do you know if she loves him or not?
 RAMPERBILL
Joined: 2/16/2010
Msg: 55
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/23/2010 6:07:50 PM
If she doesn't get him, someone else will.
------------------------------------------------------
I typed "get" into the search function of google and came up with this:

Get
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Jump to: navigation, search
Look up get in Wiktionary, the free dictionary.

Get or GET may refer to:

Get (conflict), legal issues around the Jewish divorce procedure
Get (divorce document), the Jewish divorce procedure

Hmmmmm, wonder if she's Jewish? This is so funny, just wanted to share. Maybe this is an omen of things to come.
 EVROCKS
Joined: 1/22/2010
Msg: 56
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/24/2010 6:10:41 AM
Definitely tell him. You don't have to present it as fact, just say, "I've been told that..." I've been in this position before and people like her are usually really good at doing what they do. The person with hearts in their eyes won't see it, but at least if you point it out, the red flags will be easier to see. Not to mention, you won't feel horrible when it ends up the way it sounds like it will!
 RAMPERBILL
Joined: 2/16/2010
Msg: 57
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/24/2010 6:40:32 AM
getting pregnant (and having a spontaneous abortion) trying to trap another guy" If she was trying to trap a guy she wouldn't have had the abortion.

"Spontaneous" as in - happened on its own. AKA miscarriage.
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If he said "miscarriage" he couldn't have said "entrapement." If she went out to the mall, happened to pass an abortion clinic, and decided that motherhood wasn't for her., that's spontaneous. There's no such thing as a "spontaneous abortion" except a fly by your seat decision to abort.
 Samantha44
Joined: 10/25/2008
Msg: 58
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/24/2010 7:25:07 AM
Meassage 48 said it best....I would mention something to him.

Good Luck!
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 59
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She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/24/2010 12:00:23 PM
A "spontaneous abortion" is a miscarriage, look it up before you jump to conclusions.
 RAMPERBILL
Joined: 2/16/2010
Msg: 60
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/24/2010 1:36:23 PM
A "spontaneous abortion" is a miscarriage, look it up before you jump to conclusions.
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Then he should have said "miscarriage." Saying "spontaneous abortion" is misleading, which I believe was his intent. I've never heard anyone (until now) say "spontaneous abortion" to describe a miscarriage.
 Marco8711
Joined: 10/25/2008
Msg: 61
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She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/24/2010 6:32:26 PM
If you decide not to tell him anything atleast advise him to get a pre-nup.
 Marco8711
Joined: 10/25/2008
Msg: 62
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She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/24/2010 6:36:30 PM

Who cares if she wants his money or not. If she makes him happy and he
loves her that's all that matters. It certainly isn't your job to head off every
woman who he is with just because she might want his money.



I wonder if your tone would be the same if the situation was reversed if there was a possibility HE was using her for something.
 cap_n_mORGAN
Joined: 7/3/2009
Msg: 63
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/24/2010 7:53:19 PM

If you decide not to tell him anything atleast advise him to get a pre-nup.


Make sure it is Iron Clad pre nup!!!

Also it has been proven that a food can wipe out the sex drive of a female.......It's called wedding cake.......So make sure that there is no cake at the wedding!!!!!......
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/24/2010 8:19:56 PM
An infatuated man or woman doesn't listen to anybody else's opinion.

--And some people do not learn even after repeating similar mistakes.
 NotElvisJunior
Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 65
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She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/24/2010 10:04:31 PM
rock_hunter wrote:
Would you tell him?

Yes, absolutely - but I would also be clear on what was *rumored* versus what seemed to have some sort of truth to it.

Having been the victim of a gold-digger myself - I would not only warn (but be honest about how much I know versus know much I only think I know), but I would find it somewhat repulsive NOT to give such a warning, or to hold back on this information.

rock_hunter wrote:
And if told, how would you react?

If I could confirm it, I'd probably dump her. If I was feeling particularly vindictive, I'd probably use her for whatever I could, just because she'd deserve it - but I most likely wouldn't go that route because I'm pretty much not that type of person.


Once again, though, people, this is assuming it's more than just a side rumor from a person who may or may not like the woman. I mean, come on, when it's coming from her own parents.... Seriously? It's even in uestion?



Oh, and I'm not so sure that the attitude of "this is a lesson he should learn on his own" is anything but vile. What if the roles were reversed? Men going for women for their money? Or even moreso, since this seems to be the stereotype... a man pretending sincere interest and toying with her heart just to use her for sex and leave her hanging?

Shoe on other foot and all......
 RAMPERBILL
Joined: 2/16/2010
Msg: 66
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/25/2010 4:48:21 AM
Oh, and I'm not so sure that the attitude of "this is a lesson he should learn on his own" is anything but vile. What if the roles were reversed? Men going for women for their money? Or even moreso, since this seems to be the stereotype... a man pretending sincere interest and toying with her heart just to use her for sex and leave her hanging?
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So many ways to use someone (male or female). Beware anyone with false intentions. Women get used to. Here's an example:

A mom of three has an unemployed, drug using, womanizer boyfriend who lives off her income and child support. She keeps him around because she loves him, he sticks around because he wants to make her happy and life is easy and good. So what if she's getting used, she's happy. Her happiness will most likely one day leave her destitute. While she's happy, she risks the physical and financial security of her children and herself. Who cares says the one that doesn't. Until the tables are turned.
 principles of magic
Joined: 1/7/2009
Msg: 67
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/25/2010 5:43:24 AM
"A "spontaneous abortion" is a miscarriage, look it up before you jump to conclusions.
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Then he should have said "miscarriage." Saying "spontaneous abortion" is misleading, which I believe was his intent. I've never heard anyone (until now) say "spontaneous abortion" to describe a miscarriage."

I took this to mean that she has been accused of faking a pregnancy.

OP, I would talk with this friend. Present the evidence, such as it is (i.e., this is what I heard the mother say, she asked to borrow $ from me, I'm told she owes others etc., also that you know you do not know her well enough to determine her true motives). Once you have said your piece, tell him it is up to him to decide what to do with the information, but as a friend, you could not stand by and do nothing.
 davdo
Joined: 8/4/2008
Msg: 68
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/25/2010 7:06:25 AM

Then he should have said "miscarriage." Saying "spontaneous abortion" is misleading, which I believe was his intent. I've never heard anyone (until now) say "spontaneous abortion" to describe a miscarriage."


I have heard miscarriage described this way. I think the term was quite common, up until roe vs wade. From the wikki:

In medical contexts, the word "abortion" refers to any process by which a pregnancy ends with the death and removal or expulsion of the fetus, regardless of whether it is spontaneous or intentionally induced. Many women who have had miscarriages, however, object to the term "abortion" in connection with their experience, as it is generally associated with induced abortions. In recent years there has been discussion in the medical community about avoiding the use of this term in favor of the less ambiguous term "miscarriage".[4]


As to the question at hand. Sometimes you just have to let people figure things out for themselves. The worst vice is advice. If he is happy, leave it alone. Maybe he wants to have a kid and get married. If you really feel his future is in danger, than tell him. If you doubt the veracity of the rumors, don't say anything.
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 69
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She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/25/2010 7:14:38 AM
msg1:
No I would not tell him, he won't believe me any way. I would just give him advice to be careful that he is not taken for a ride on dealing with *women,*" take note: not her" so if in the long run he finds out that she is a hard core golddiger I will not be blame...

If your friend is really rich, I am not worried for he knows how to play with his money . He will know his money's worth.. > If he is smart to become rich ,then he is smart not to become an easy prey.<

He maybe generous to his godson but that is different..
 prettypictures
Joined: 1/29/2010
Msg: 70
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She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/25/2010 7:14:48 AM
What if you are wrong?

Come on you have not been out with her, have you?

you have not seen her bank account have you?

who has she scammed money off in the past? and how much? can you prove this?

Usually Gold Diggers are rich women going for richer men to bulk their fortunes of property, houses, boats, cars etc

you say this girl is broke and fallen in love with a man and he loves her back

I see a green eyed monster raising its head here, LEAVE THEM ALONE they are happy.
 RAMPERBILL
Joined: 2/16/2010
Msg: 71
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/25/2010 7:40:27 AM
Many women who have had miscarriages, however, object to the term "abortion" in connection with their experience, as it is generally associated with induced abortions.
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Do they have induced miscarriages too?
 rock_hunter
Joined: 11/6/2007
Msg: 72
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/25/2010 7:46:33 AM
So finally I didn't need to broach the subject, he did it. Last Friday they went together to the Feria de Sevilla and met some people who knows him (and her) and they were surprised, too. Some of them weren't so shy about talking, so he received a quite detailed report. I confirmed I heard the rumors and gave the few facts I had. He matched this with some other things -she never paid for anything, pouting if not eating out, talking about needing money for tuition, that kind of things- and decided she's not the girl for him. The dangers and joys of living in a small city.

By the way, BBD means "big, better deal". Dumping a guy for other with more money. And used "spontaneous abortion" because I was involuntarily translating from Spanish.

And yes, people could be wrong. But he's my friend and she's not, so...
 RAMPERBILL
Joined: 2/16/2010
Msg: 73
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/25/2010 7:54:31 AM
By the way, BBD means "big, better deal". Dumping a guy for other with more money. And used "spontaneous abortion" because I was involuntarily translating from Spanish.
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Great. Did she have an abortion, miscarriage, spontaneous abortion, or induced miscarriage.
 rock_hunter
Joined: 11/6/2007
Msg: 74
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/25/2010 8:18:07 AM
Miscarriage, I think. But it doesn't matter anymore.
 GotAHubCapDiamondStarHalo
Joined: 10/25/2009
Msg: 75
She's a gold-digger...would you tell him?
Posted: 4/25/2010 8:42:14 AM

If he said "miscarriage" he couldn't have said "entrapement." If she went out to the mall, happened to pass an abortion clinic, and decided that motherhood wasn't for her., that's spontaneous. There's no such thing as a "spontaneous abortion" except a fly by your seat decision to abort.
Miscarriage is a type of abortion. It is not "decided." YOU are talking about a clinical "induced" abortion. Other countries do not necessarily have a separate term for miscarriage. She could have tried to entrap with pregnancy and later had a spontaneous abortion (miscarriage).

Did you see OP's post #27?

Spontaneous means involuntary.



Induced abortion and miscarriage are similar life events in that women abort after a short term of pregnancy. However, the two life events differ in important respects. Miscarriage happens involuntarily and suddenly to women who were expecting to give birth a few months later, whereas abortion is a planned and known event.


I don't think the OP intended to mislead. He just ran into the conflict between medical terminology in his language and the "softer" more PC term for the unplanned loss of a fetus that we commonly use in our country. You seem to be one of few who was unfamiliar with the terminology. I hope that means you have been lucky enough to have not been close to any such loss.
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