| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/16/2006 6:43:30 AM | HI I'v been on this site now for about eight months. The problem I see is that when you write to a lady , ONE you get no answer, TWO you get a responce back that well say, I have my eye on some one els. NOW you now that is a not the truth, because that is a standard line. the lady should write her own message. I also find that there is alot of conceted women out there.
I'm one of those men who loves to treat a woman like a lady, But I guess women want to say in the same habits thier comfortable with. I would like it if some of them would or just one would give me a try, and see some thing differant. | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/16/2006 7:08:54 AM | In my case, I've seen lots of profiles that I'd like to comment on, such as, interesting photos, or commentary that really interests me, etc. However, the "75 mile" limit on their profile makes it impossible to contact them.
I find it interesting that so many people truly want to find someone to make a connection with, but yet, they are unwilling to cast their net further than their own backyard. I realize that long distance relationships can be difficult, but (especially in the case of rural areas) shouldn't you already have an indication of who's single in that area already? Why does anyone screen that tightly at the very beginning? Doesn't it make more sense to cast a broad net and then narrow down after you've grabbed the attention of some?
As to replying, I reply to anyone that is thoughtful enough to contact me, even if it's to let them know that I don't feel it's a good fit. It's courtesy and it's the way I'd like to be treated. However, I don't get upset if I don't get a response, because a lack or response is just as powerful as a brushoff. They indicate that it's a person I wouldn't be compatable with anyway. | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/16/2006 3:19:23 PM | Perhaps we could start by making a punch list of women,, and men,,, not to contact,,, oh,,, if a woman gets 100 messages and cant get to return yours,, you would think she would find someone with so many opportunities,, but guess what,, these women are here,, month after month,, year after year,
i know of a gal here that i contacted and she ignored me,, then i tried again,, again she ignored me,, then she blocked me,,, the i found her on yahoo,,, still lying in her profile there too,,, whats up with this? | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/16/2006 3:28:28 PM | | Baker thats funny. I wouldnt sweat it. Sounds like you probably saw a light at the end of the tunnel but didnt realize it was a train that would run you over. :) | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/16/2006 3:49:19 PM | | well big josh, most women out there are looking for a certain look they think will make them happy, when in fact that certain type is going to hurt them too. they want the bad boys who they think they can help change thier ways. So if you don`t have the look they are looking for they just ignore you like you`re a lepor and don`t have the common courtesy to reply and say ( thanks you but you`re not my type) | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/16/2006 5:14:29 PM | I hate to say it, but I have the exact opposite problem. MEN don't respond to MY messages and if they do it's ONLY to talk dirty and they get pissed at me when I don't go for that kind of talk.  I've been in TX 2 1/2 yrs and haven't found a man YET that wants more than just a sexual encounter. I'm looking for a good man to spend some quality time with, someone to talk with...about things other than sex. So far Texas men haven't shown me they have an ounce of respect for women, especially if she has some meat on her bones. I'm a good hearted woman and deserve respect just the same as all those thin, mindless women with big boobs. I have to say however, my experiences have been on all the other singles sites. i'm new to this one so will reserve judgement for now. So, if there's any man out there willing to give ME a shout, I WILL reply | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/16/2006 6:36:32 PM | Judy, I've experienced this problem and after the first time, I set my account to not accept emails from individuals looking for things like that  As for the original question in mind...I have made some friends on here and have heard of people looking in the wrong direction for someone. "There is someone for everyone"...yes, this is true but are we being realistic with ourselves? Are we looking at what's outside and not inside? There is such a thing as "barking up the wrong tree" I ALWAYS answer someone back but if I'm not interested, they will know but not in a rude way...The only time I will NOT respond is when someone talks "slang" "ghetto" or "sexual" to me. I have responded to individuals like this before and politely said I was not his type only to be cussed at and told "your loss ****"...this is why most of us don't respond to turn someone down. If someone doesn't respond, just know that they were not the right one for you and move on and READ their profiles and be specific about something you read in their profile to show you read it...having a sense of humor helps alot....we all like to smile and laugh and be with someone who can share that So, open your hearts and stop trying...if it's meant to be, it will be
Hugs,
Miss Raven | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/17/2006 4:44:36 AM | Miss Raven
Thank you for your response. I was responding to one of the mens' blog with this question. As I stated in MINE, most of what I was referring to so far, were issues from other sites, which don't HAVE the ability to not receive messages from people with this attitude/history whatever. I HAVE put that into this site. And I did START OUT trying to be polite in my refusals to connect with guys like this but they don't take no for an answer so the politeness has gone away. I haven't been IN this site all that long so we'll see where it goes. So far not much interest here either. Not many Texas men are interested in a pleasingly plump lady, who's a transplant to TX.
Judy56 | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/17/2006 1:56:47 PM | The main issue is not only so much as not reading the profile, but just not having the ability of being able to point out something on their profile that could make for small talk. Admit it, sometimes us men have a tendency to think we should charm them with our picture (not a chance with MY pic) or a line or two of humor.
I figure I send out 10 letters out a week, mostly because I think the profile of the person is interesting in one form or another.
As to why they don't respond vary by individual. It could be that they are overwhelmed by the amount of mail they receive, they had a bad day, or simply just don't get what I'm writing if it has a slightly twisted since of humor in it.
I'm not a total troll, but if they can't read my profile and "get it" then perhaps I'm better off without them.
The big thing is to simply not take it personal, write and move on and try not to write the same person twice if they rejected you.
The only time *I* don't respond to letters is if I think they're spam.
I'm easy, I'll talk to anyone, but just because I talk to someone doesnt mean I'm going to want to jump in the sack. | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/17/2006 4:14:14 PM | 1.) we're picky.. we have to be.. as said earlier.
2.) having a picture helps. its not that we're shallow but lets face it.. probably one of the main reasons you messaged us is because of [u]our[/u] picture.
3.) grammar! i can't tell you how much of a turn off it is to recieve and email from a gentlemen and he abbreviates almost everything, or spells incorrectly.
just a few pointers.  | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/17/2006 5:39:29 PM | im sure if i posted a pic i would get more responses or replies but i like to leave things to the imagination an haven't taken any recently ..doesn't mean i am an ugly girl most say i look better in person anyways | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/17/2006 6:09:27 PM | Well, I was thinking the same thing, but it took me awhile to find a camera that wouldn't break, which was an incredible challenge.
The only real reason why I posted my pic was to prove I'm not a total knuckle dragger, and by my wearing glasses, it proves that I have SOME intelligence. | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/17/2006 6:09:41 PM | | Way to go Rock.....you sound like the type we DO avoid with good cause. You're a male version of what you so lovingly refer to ALL us women....guess you're out on the town nightly aren't you? Treating women with UTMOST RESPECT!!!!! Yeah right!!!!! | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/22/2006 5:15:23 PM | Crickle hit the nail on the head bro ... lol. Big John 69. Did you choose that name because your tall, your name is John and you were born in 1969 .. or were you feeling your wheaties and decided to go fishing with a tag that really means "I have a really big johnson and love the #69 position. lol its all to funny now.
Bro I am not flaming you on this one .. but geeeez get a new tag .. because if I got a message from "Mankiller****ofalltimes" I would be really hesatant to talk to her! | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/22/2006 6:23:51 PM | This reply is for BigJosh69,...What's in a name and a pic posted? About the same image our profiles conjure up. Being relatively new to online dating and this site, the same thought has occurred to me regarding the lack of responses. I haven't personally checked your profile & pics out to understand some of the comments both guys and gals have suggested changes to be made, but I can say a few things about my short experience. I'm on two paid sites and three FREE sites. It amazes me to see the same ladies on 2 or more and to be the ones so picky about the superficial profile & pics.
If anyone should respond,..it should be the wantons that are looking for Mr. Goodbar and posted on multiple sites. Of course the negative sometime surfaces in these threads and I have to remind myself that the majority of onliners,... either kicked somebody or have been "kicked to the curb" in a prior marriage or long term relationship. The psychologist would have a field day making observations about our society so transfixed on the recent substitution of traditional dating encounters in lieu of this online gig.
When you do chat/e-mail and eventually connect with a persone behind an inaccurate profile and pic, . . then show up to meet someone and see how long it takes to be disillusioned about this process. But I can honestly say,..I post pics I believe are worse than how I look now to avoid this issue. For me,...my divorce was final May 11, '06 and didn't just jump online for a rebound relationship or string of one-nighters to confirm "I'm O.K." after the fallout. I still believe there is a God, and a person in line somewhere (maybe WalMart-lol instead of this facade of online stuff,...) that will be right for both people's happiness. Attitude from hope and faith will go a long way until she comes along. Try smiling while you type your IM or e-mail message,...it has a positive effect on the message we send.
Wow,..that actually felt like therapy for me to get that off my chest. Thanks BigJosh69. I do agree with one of the ladies that posted her knee jerk reaction to the BIG Josh 69,...from what my ex tells me about her online experiences - most ladies would run from both subliminal messages. Big Josh and 69 regardless of how they match your stature and year born.  | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/22/2006 7:04:00 PM | I can't believe it's only women that don't reply. I've been ignored by men. And the few men that have IM'd me were weirdos who just wanted to talk about sex. Not that I don't like sex but it's not the first thing I want to talk about to get to know somebody. Or they've IM'd me types about 5 sentences, barely, and want to meet you someplace right away. I'm sorry, but that's just a little scary to me. I'd like to get to know somebody a little bit before I went someplace to meet them.
But stop with the women don't respond! The men don't respond either. And there's men and women who are looking for junk on here and men and women who are normal people looking for friends or more. How can you generalize when it's the same on both sides?
Ok I'm done preaching now.  | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/22/2006 9:40:40 PM | [ Did u think sometimes woman are more looking at the men’s looks. Its summer, it’s the time to show off, and a woman needs a show boy. Anyways no were in the message does it say about IM because that what I am assuming you are talking about, Message in email form, so you have time to write back and so forth. Have you read some of the messages woman write.
Here are examples.
EX 1. About Me
ASK ME....
EX 2. About Me
What do you think its alot about the sex
EX 3. About Me
Tell u later
EX 4. About Me
I need to give this some thought...Will have it done soon....
What you expect with all of these people on here who are clueless.
What happened when it was ok to go together in the bus at the movie walk there spend time together. What happened to being together for each other and not for interests?
Why don’t they put who they are versus what people think of them or say what person they want. ]
Honestly that's not the case . Women can have a whole bunch of wierd ish in there description , men can't . That's just how it is . I have what i deem necessary for a woman to understand . I've seen girl that talk about little green men in their profile and she's still getting offers . Because really us men can care less .
Anyways its time for the dating web sites to change. Pictures need to be clearer, deleted account after 10 days of no use. Removed from web site if they ignore excessive amount of people. Stuff like that. Forcing people to really talk to them and tell them here is what’s wrong with u. I take structural criticism pretty good. If a girl tells me well I don’t like this because… and I see its not to bee of important to change I will, if it’s a personality issue then I will tell them back what I may think. Well gots to go byeeee | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/27/2006 7:26:02 PM | | we all say we are looking for someone but we never take the time to get to know the person...they send an e-mail we sometimes read it but we look at the picture and go on from that...if its not what we like we dont respond... i also have been in texas for about 2 yrs and have yet to meet a good guy here who does not only want sex. i may not be the smallest girl and the hottest girl ever....but i think im cute and look good how i am.i know for myself that i have written a few guys on here and never get anything back. be nice and say hey thank you for thinking im cute or what ever but your not my type. i hope you find what your looking for take care... i know thats what i do.. if people take the time to get to know a person they might be missing out on a great person a good friend or "that one" if we really stop looking at just pictures and read the profile and talk to him/her we could be alot happier!!!! | |
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| Why do most women not reply or give it a try?
Posted: 7/27/2006 8:26:13 PM | | Look! This isn't a perfect world with perfect people (myself included!). Alot of Men and Women on this site have had their share of dysfunctional relationships. What percentage of females on this site are raising kids by themselves? 80%? What about the Men? How many are paying child support or raising kids themselves?......I have hear recently from the Media that about 50% of marriages don't make it. The Leave it to Beaver days are over folks. There are many Grandparents raising their Grandchildren! What's up with that? Since the 60's Society has taken a turn for the worst, so Sociologists say. I believe that!....I really don't expect alot of my e-mails to be returned, I've been on this deal for 2 weeks and sent out 15-18 e-mails and I think about 5-6 returned a note to me. I have gotten 3-4 e-mails from females I did not contact first and I sent a note back to all of them (one was from a female Shrink), I would of been cursed if I did not sent a note back to that one....maybe she thinks I'm healthy or maybe she want to study my brain.....Who knows.....Yeah, I want the young hot educated chick! I will be honest with you and my chances are slim to none but WHAT THE HELL, YOU JUST PRESS ON AND DO WHAT YOU CAN DO, this deal is half fantasy and half reality...you get my drift?????? | |
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