| | How long before you got your first date?Page 3 of 9 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9) | Far too many 'working girls' for comfort prowling the Internet for easy money- not just on POF, by any means.
It's extremely tedious to be accosted by three word messages from hookers in Manchester, just because you're over 60 and therefore totally desperate!
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/2/2010 3:50:11 AM | ^^^^I can understand guys wanting to avoid these types of members. But why totally ignore the rest of us? I have lost count of how many first messages I have sent recently all to be read/deleted it is so soul destroying. It seems to me that most guys ARE just looking for the type of women discribed above but who will do it for free. I am not one of them!
Like strictly I am very downhearted by the whole experience but am not willing to give up on the idea that there must be some real men who want real relationships on POF so we soldier on.
OT....I meet as soon as possible, I dont have to many servicable years left in me to waste time 
Just received this message, one of very very few I receive is it any wonder we get upset ...
"who ate all the pies who ate all the pies u fat **stard u fat **stard..."
This came from somone I have never ever spoken to, who says they are a genuine kind guy who treats everyone with resepct! Yeah right ok m8 grrrrr | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/2/2010 4:00:59 AM | "It just puts a damper on whether the whole online dating thing works to find any sort of meaningful relationship.."
I take a slightly more positive attitude to it - but only slightly! My take on it is that it can and does work - but to nowhere near the extent one might think it should. It's just another option, and no less like finding a needle in a haystack than the others.
As I have said before, the most valuable aspects of these sites with regards to opportunties to set up dates are their events. Insofar as POF events are concerned, I think it is a pity there aren't more of them.
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/2/2010 4:36:43 AM |
It's extremely tedious to be accosted by three word messages from hookers in Manchester, just because you're over 60 and therefore totally desperate!
Marvellous.
I live in Manchester and don't even get propositioned by three word hookers :(
Time to hang up me keyboard ... | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/2/2010 6:38:08 AM | Hunnibelle - I've had a couple like that too or the one I was sent from an opening gambit to someone who expressed themselves as open, genuine and far from shallow where I to be met with the reply 'I don't date fat ar*ed women!' Fair enough but saying you are looking for someone slim and attractive in your profile would have meant I just bypassed it rather than the whole genuine/non-shallow claims in their profile.
I think Devon Geek has hit the nail on the head - too many time wasters on dating sites (male and female!)
Whilst I am not suggesting people compromise on their wants list, I did expect the guys locally to be a little more open to just 'meeting up' and it would be an interesting experiment to put a few people together and see whether they would respond to each other from their profiles and then get them to meet and see whether their first impressions were different - I suspect it would be rather illuminating with many actually getting on with people they had rejected from their profiles or initial contact. Not saying they would create long term relationships but I think people would 'meet' more people and create more opportunities if they were more open to people that contact them rather than immediately hitting 'read delete' or 'unread delete' without thinking twice.After all, the profile and pictures are merely a flat, 2D persona on a screen, the person you meet is the real deal and it is easier to tell when someone is in front of you whether you are compatible. I just find it difficult because I think too many people write people off purely on face value and chemistry is far more complex than looking at a few pictures and some contrived words on a page imho. | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 5:44:02 AM | Well,
I'm not even sure that I've posted in the right place but it does seem appropiate. I've been a member here for a while now and yes I'm married and yes I'm looking. My profle is truthful and I'm in a position at the moment where for health reasons I cannot and will not leave my wife as I am a primary carer for her. I am not looking for some young single girl to meet but rather someone who may in postion similar to myself that may be missing human/physical contact. I have messaged quite a few of you ladies and have recieved a few replys, some deleted unread, some read and others not read. I am actively chatting with someone at the moment and although she is not exactly what you waould call ''local'' the distance involved isnt that great. I echo what most of you seem to say here that meeting as quickly as possible seems the best way of doing things as opposed to endless emails and messenger exchanges. We have agreed to meet this week but I havent promised anything. Above all I think we should meet to indeed see if we ''click'' and as you've also said it we dont then it would have been an interesting afternoon. We have been chatting here for a week or so and also spoken on the phone. She has thrown quite a few sexual innuendos into our course of chat/texts/calls and I have to say that it has kinda put me off a bit. She said she'd met a lot of guys from here and has told me several stories of bad experiences she's mostly all seem to revolve around hotel rooms. I am now beginning to question if I have made the right decision and indeed maybe should have waited a bit longer before exchanging email/phone numbers etc.. So I guess that kind of contradicts what I've said. What I am saying is I think its important to get as much info as possible before arranging a meeting and not diving in at the deep end like I have just done. I'm not implying that she's a bad person, just that she has me ''A little concerned''. mmmmmm | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 5:57:56 AM | OP I have been a member for 3 months now and not a sniff of a first date. If I email guys the trend is to ignore them (but I realise this is common across the board and that person is wrong for you if they do this anyway). Most emails are one liners (the moths) or I get an interesting email and reply but they never return that email (so I wonder is that mass emailing but with longer emails) so I have only had perhaps 3 or 4 conversations that have gone beyond 2 emails each and these seem to have fizzled out after a few exchanges also - perhaps these people have got bored or been chatting to other women (not naive I am not bothered by this as it is the nature of the game) and gone out on a date and may not be emailing others for a while.
Now that's fine because these people obviously aren't right for me or the conversation would carry on, so not meaning this as self-pity (before the mods delete me thinking that it is) just curious whether or not I am being impatient (one of my faults is that I always want everything yesterday! I have had to learn to temper that as I have got older.)
I was just wondering, how long before you went on your first date from here?
........................Heres the honest answer. You may not like it but if you want quality dates heres what you should do.
Lose weight, get a new wardrobe of clothes/a new look/hairstyle, join a gym/get in shape, project a healthy and positive self image. Get some good pics taken.
Problem solved...next | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 6:11:38 AM |
........................Heres the honest answer. You may not like it but if you want quality dates heres what you should do.
Lose weight, get a new wardrobe of clothes/a new look/hairstyle, join a gym/get in shape, project a healthy and positive self image. Get some good pics taken.
Problem solved...next
Unbloodybelieveable....
Forgive me if i'm wrong & being rather thick (after all you don't think much of many of the women here) but I think you'll find the OP was asking how long before you got your first date? NOT asking for a character assasignation???
OP stick with it girl not all the guys here are complete tossers & do actually appreciate REAL profiles! | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 6:16:49 AM |
But I may just get lucky and meet someone at one of the event meets..who knows..?!
I'm resigned to thinking just that very same thought...  | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 6:18:38 AM | Northern Light, she said she cant get a date and gets few messages, Im helping her, unlike you.
Where did I comment on her character?
Stop projecting your own insecurity. | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 7:03:35 AM | Northern Light, she said she cant get a date and gets few messages, Im helping her, unlike you.
Helping her by what ripping her to shreds on a public forum?
NO I fail to agree with your bleat of 'being helpful' I personally find it darn right nasty & malicious. Being helpful would be in the form of a private mail if that really was your intention? Or again was it to try & make yourself look clever?
Stop projecting your own insecurity.
Sweetheart, YOU know nothing about me bar a few lines on my profile & a photo or two. Let me suggest you don't even begin to start to try & analyse me. I may be a little too complex for the likes of you! | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 7:20:26 AM | Giving positive advice is not ripping someone to shreds, please stop being a prima donna, I did not question the posters character or rip her to shreds, stop telling lies. The thread is posted on a public forum, giving advice on how to get dates in response is reasonable.
You obviously have your own issues claiming your 36 yrs old etc.
Grow up and stop acting like a child. | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 7:31:08 AM | Blimey,
There are some truly awful people here...
People are what they are and don't deserve s**t from someone as narrow minded as you ^^^  | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 7:50:15 AM | Giving positive advice is not ripping someone to shreds, please stop being a prima donna, I did not question the posters character or rip her to shreds, stop telling lies. The thread is posted on a public forum, giving advice on how to get dates in response is reasonable.
& I REPEAT myself once AGAIN... The OP's actual question was HOW LONG BEFORE YOU GOT YOUR FIRST DATE???
How can telling someone her wardrobe, hair, weight is all wrong be positive??!
You obviously have your own issues claiming your 36 yrs old etc.
Grow up and stop acting like a child. [/Quote]
Last i looked it wasn't actually me spitting my dummy??
Well my only issues today are i've wide shoulders, thick skin & can hear the constant babble of attention seeking nonsense today..... Throw at me what you want but I suggest if there is anything intelligent you actually want to spout do so in a private mail i'm leaving this thread & I refuse to feed trolls. | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 7:51:08 AM | Obviously I'm not the only one who thinks that a certain member is totally out of order.
'flaming' other Forum members is unacceptable, unecessary and specifically forbidden in the rules.
Such comments are rude, thoughtless and should not be voiced in public.
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 8:34:21 AM | Cant you read properly northern light? Post 1.
I have been a member for 3 months now and not a sniff of a first date. If I email guys the trend is to ignore them (but I realise this is common across the board and that person is wrong for you if they do this anyway). Most emails are one liners (the moths) or I get an interesting email and reply but they never return that email | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 9:00:40 AM | awwww ... sorry to hear you're not having much luck poster 68 ... keep your chin up ... perhaps you should try losing some weight and going to the gym ... !
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/6/2010 10:40:47 AM | Guys I am cool with it honestly :-) But thanks to everyone who said this guy (can't even be bothered to look what his name is) is out of order.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with my wardrobe (and how the heck the guy here in question can tell me there is anything wrong with my wardrobe from a couple of head and shoulders shots and a picture where I am dressed up on stage performing IN A COSTUME is quite beyond me but hey ho, that's his opinion and he is entitled to it).
As for losing some weight... yeah I could do but you know what I am a busy person, enjoy life, I swim and walk regularly and I adore food, and quite frankly life is too short to waste it worrying about every morsel I put in my mouth. I am happy in my skin and in Reuben's day men would have revered me as a goddess but unfortunately our media is hell bent on a certain image these days that they think everyone should ascribe to be - well I don't! Besides what is a healthy self image? A skinny and starved or emaciated size 6 (sorry anyone who is naturally that slim but I am referring to people who starve themselves to attain a media image of perfection not those people who are naturally slim).
What was the other comment? Ah yes, get a new hairstyle - actually my main pic was when I got a new hairstyle and had had my hair straightened. It is usually curly. I love my long curly hair and lots of other people have said they wished they had it.
As for get better photos? Better photos of what? I am what I am and I am damn proud of what I am, what I have done and what I have achieved in life.
I am have a positive self image and it certainly won't be damaged some pathetic and arrogant little man on a dating site forum who thinks he can tell exactly what a person is or does from a few photos and a few lines on a profile :-) | |
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DaBees
| | Joined: 7/15/2010
Msg: 71 | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/21/2010 4:57:28 AM | | For me it is fine to have couple of the first meets but when the things start to go serious I freak out.. I am now just in that same position.. my brain working overtime to add all of the reasons why not to proceed to a proper date | |
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/21/2010 5:06:19 AM | QUOTE MAVERICK
As for losing some weight... yeah I could do but you know what I am a busy person
As for get better photos? Better photos of what? I am what I am and I am damn proud of what I am
in Reuben's day men would have revered me as a goddess.
....................A Goddess, Lol. What are you on.
....................Excellent, but why post a thread wondering why you dont get messages or dates, if your not willing to accept any form of critical appraisal ?
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| How long before you got your first date?
Posted: 10/21/2010 5:22:30 AM | Beauty is in the eye of the beholder
I always believe theres someone out there for everyone
So dont dare change the way you look dress or act
Love the song I AM WHAT I AM | |
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