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 Sabrosura089
Joined: 11/29/2009
Msg: 26
Couples 45+Page 2 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
OP: Is this a "typical" Saturday afternoon for you? Do you just go out and analyze people?? Do you do this for fun? or some sort of study you're conducting?

Seriously, we have so much going on in our city, yet you people watch (which we all do/enjoy), and come to all these "conclusions".............

How do you know for sure they are couples and 45+? I don't know, but this just sounds silly (with all due respect).
 Welsh474
Joined: 9/13/2010
Msg: 27
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/5/2010 12:25:26 PM
So maybe it means that folks that shop at a Farmer's Market are leaner than those that shop at Safeway or hang out at MacDonalds. Maybe it doesn't mean anything at all. How the heck can you tell who has been in a long term relationship or a short term relationship by who walks by, no questions asked. Who knows if some were brother and sister or just friends or co-workers. The whole thing seems silly as a way of gathering "data" to form an opinion.
 woobytoodsday
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 28
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Couples 45+
Posted: 10/5/2010 1:09:30 PM
I'd be very interested in the demographics of the post dinner time crowd at Whole Foods versus Trader Joe's. . . . . Or the Staten Island Ferry. Oh, so many choices! So many reasons to love New York, eh?

 DrummingNut
Joined: 4/26/2010
Msg: 29
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/5/2010 1:12:06 PM

The pattern was consistent. Recent Couples (less than two years or so together) ...

O for goodness sake.

You don't know how long ANY of those couples have been together.

That puts a gigantic flaw into everything else you've written in opening post.

It turns it all into empty mumbings of fingers on a keyboard.

(and kinda makes you seem... odd)

But as others have pointed out,
(even if you did know length of years being couples),
it was only one venue for one afternoon.
Maybe the different style shirt people were over across town at something else!
 WalksOnWater2
Joined: 5/19/2009
Msg: 30
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/5/2010 1:43:51 PM
I haven't seen such a great collection of assumptions for a long time. (45 or not)


My take-away. No man past age 45 has any chance in hell of effecting a new Relationship unless he is trim, perhaps exceptionally so. A warm smile is required. A Brooks Bros shirt is an effective mating signal, a sweatshirt is not. Good grooming, i.e. recent haircut, hair combed, fresh shower/shave, is required.

It appears no woman -- herself fat or otherwise -- will accept any man but a trim man. It appears no man -- himself fat or otherwise -- will accept any woman but a trim one. And the trimness was distinctly notable.


I browsed the Pof testimonials the other day, and saw that 70% or more of the happy couples were chubby fellows. That alone demolishes your assumption that the trim only get paired.
I never pay attention to the quality of the shirts men wear, and I couldn't tell a Brooks Bros shirt from e Walmart one, if it walked up and brained me.

The assumption that trim men accept only trim women and vice versa it baloney, look at people everywhere, perhaps the farmer’s market in your neighborhood is not the only place people congregate, although I think that your eyes chose to follow only the trim ones.
Then again I may be biased, see, I don’t like very skinny men, I will not look twice at anyone that I can lift off the ground with one arm … People have different tastes.


 peppermint petunias
Joined: 9/2/2009
Msg: 31
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/5/2010 2:13:59 PM

Unfortunately, none of your observational information is useful, because you started by ASSUMING you could tell at a glance who was a couple, who was a long-term couple, and who was a recent couple. Had you been able to actually verify who was who, your observations might have been illuminating about THEM. Since it was not possible to verify, instead all of your observations illuminate only YOU.


Well said..

When 2 people are into each other/enjoy each other, it can be a second or third date and all you arm chair pseudo experts on people reading would think they had been together for years. PULEeeeese.


Seriously, we have so much going on in our city, yet you people watch (which we all do/enjoy), and come to all these "conclusions".............


SERIOUSLY..

Op You may be what my mother would have called detached from being a part of the human experience and just an observer..
 cmd1957a
Joined: 1/19/2009
Msg: 32
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/5/2010 3:06:36 PM
Ok so the earth is round, the sky is blue and water is wet. So basically your conclusions to this "day of people watching" is that people looking for relationships tend to take care of themselves better, dress better and are more concerned with their appearance than those who are in long term relationships. That is not exactly 6 pm news material is it? I think I could have slept in saturday morning and came to the same conclusions.
 clockwork lime
Joined: 8/12/2009
Msg: 33
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/5/2010 3:18:21 PM

I think I could have slept in saturday morning and came to the same conclusions.

But would you have picked up on the Brooks Brothers shirt phenomeon?
 brattymx3
Joined: 4/24/2009
Msg: 34
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/5/2010 7:32:25 PM
oh i soooo agree with message 10!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not only menopause but thyroid problems, etc.. but yet i still see a ton of men with big big beer bellies!!!!
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 35
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Couples 45+
Posted: 10/10/2010 2:49:09 PM
"what I did for a living, a good living BTW, for 34 years was to observe people."

I wonder what in the world THAT job was. It obviously had nothing to do with science, or marketing analysis, or with anything ELSE that involved actually VERIFYING any of the "data" the OP imagined he gathered.

Apparently, he was able to choose which brand of shirt to wear to try to get laid, so if that DOES work, and he reports back to us, I'm CERTAINLY going to invest heavily in Brooks Brothers stock. THAT would be TRULY useful data.
 ChillinChill
Joined: 10/2/2010
Msg: 36
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/10/2010 3:25:57 PM
I'm sorry OP... but sometimes what goes on in your head is not actually what is going on in the room.
I think your observations are far from fact.

I like to people watch too and It is one of my favorite pass times, especially in Harvard Square..... however I do not think in my imagination are data based facts.

I think you've taken some day dreaming to a WHOLE NUTHA LEVEL.
 soicat
Joined: 3/3/2010
Msg: 37
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/10/2010 9:34:04 PM
I hope you keep casting pearls here, WW, even though we don't deserve it and against the biblical injunction.

Your observations strike me as quite astute, and food for thought.
 christ on a crutch
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 38
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Couples 45+
Posted: 10/11/2010 6:28:20 PM

I wonder what in the world THAT job was.

i was thinking security or law enforcement of some kind, in which instincts and the ability to recognize the quack of a duck are paramount.
 Annie was here
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 39
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/12/2010 1:47:46 PM
I think waywardwynde that you started you little experiment with your thoughts,beliefs and conclusions already"cemented" and came out of it finding "exactly" what you expected to find.Now why do you think that is?
 browneyesboo
Joined: 5/19/2005
Msg: 40
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Couples 45+
Posted: 10/13/2010 11:13:57 AM
I was out to lunch today and I noticed that everyone I saw
was either by themselves or with someone else and I tried to
guess if they were co workers or spouses and I decided they
were all having illicit affairs, so I scowled at them so they
would be aware of what I thought about that sort of behavior,
even though I figured they didn't really care or know what I was about.
I also noted some were overweight and I wondered if they were
allowed illicit affairs or if their affairs were more spontaneous.

Next time I'm out, I think I'll ask them so my findings will be more
beneficial.
 Buckets_of_Sky
Joined: 2/7/2010
Msg: 41
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Posted: 10/20/2010 6:14:14 PM
Your next empirical evidence should be gathered at a Big Truck Rally or at a WWF gathering... please report back I am terribly interested in your finding and if they match your first set of assumptions.
 Free-At-Last
Joined: 7/15/2009
Msg: 42
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/21/2010 8:39:48 PM
Wow....somebody REALLY needs to get a life of his own!!!
I find it amazing how some people go through life analyizing everything
Maybe next Saturday you can go to the Flea Market and count how many fleas are there.......
 rustytraveler
Joined: 4/30/2007
Msg: 43
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Couples 45+
Posted: 10/21/2010 9:47:05 PM

Ok so the earth is round, the sky is blue and water is wet. So basically your conclusions to this "day of people watching" is that people looking for relationships tend to take care of themselves better, dress better and are more concerned with their appearance than those who are in long term relationships. That is not exactly 6 pm news material is it? I think I could have slept in saturday morning and came to the same conclusions.


There ya go.

But let's also mention that there are cultural biases as well... not every country or neighborhood is the same, even from one end to another. Very slim is also media propaganda ... we consume what we're told to... just look at the fashion industry and their impossible position on selling anorexia as a fashion statement, while the average woman is size 10-12-14. My theory is that it's all part of the love/hate relationship that gay guys in fashion have for females, golden coochie envy with lots sour grapes as far as I'm concerned . Or you could also say there are public personas and couplings and private ones.... and that styles change depending on the era and economic fluctuations, a lot of men in poor countries like fat women... because its a sign of plenty... and the way we're going in the present recession.... fat might once again become fashionable in America .
 ALMOSTABLONDE
Joined: 9/30/2010
Msg: 44
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/22/2010 4:08:06 AM
OP, I think you may have done a "1+1=3"...I am sure many of your conclusions are correct, but some may be incorrect...true love- is it that formulaic?

In the past there have been studies & popular books, like John T Molloy's "Dress For Success" & "Why Men Marry Some Women & Not Others", "Body Language Secrets" by Don Steele. Yes, sociology & evolutionary psychology tells us the more successful males marry the better looking females. Bossard's Law tells us people tend to marry someone who lives or works within 25 miles of where they live or work. So yes, perhaps we can stack the odds in our favor ...

"Falling" in love can not be disected, predicted, etc. Think of the lyrics to the song, "This Magic Moment"...recall when you 1st fell in love. Maybe it was pheremones, or some other scientific/sociological gobble-dee-gook. Or maybe it was his big brown eyes looking at you like a puppy, or maybe it was the curve of her hip, her shy smile, a knowing look shared between the 2 of you!

Perhaps we should stop clicking boxes on a website & trust fate, karma, the universe to send us a "magic moment" ...maybe if we all started following our heart's desires & being our true selves, we'd meet that oh-so-unique-other-half
 NotNative
Joined: 5/16/2008
Msg: 45
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Posted: 10/22/2010 2:58:14 PM
Women can and do have relationships and very happy marriages with with overweight men. As they say, Beauty is only skin deep but Ugly is to the bone. If a guy is exceptionally well groomed and trim and is nice "eye candy" or "arm candy," that's just an attention getter, the same as a nice shiny paint job makes me notice the car, but the car could still be a huge POS. It then remains to be seen what if anything more he has to offer. If he has a nasty personality, he's toast. If he's crooked, he's toast. If he's a player, he's toast. And so on. A fat guy or a guy of average looks, or guy with a scar, or a guy who's missing an arm or a leg night be a fantastically better companion and /or spouse and an absolute joy to be with. But Mr. Moviestar Looks might be an all-around loser.

I have never understood why some people have such deep convictions that "he (or she) must be super good-looking to be with me." Yeah? Why? I guess I just have never been status-conscious with people. I like what I like and I don't need to make other women envy me. I appreciate quality, but what I rank as high quality has never necessarily fit what most of the crowd is choosing. I am a Briggs Meyers ENTJ, so I think that "NTJ" part strongly predisposes me to examine the contents, instead of the box. >;-) In the end, looks don't make or break a relationship to me. Lots of other real-life details can, though.

One big difference I see between many young never-married men and many 40+ men is that the 40+ crowd has a real chip. Maybe y'all got used to bossing the wife and kids and being king of the house or something, but man, are y' all nasty and bitter! And bossy! And intolerant. And whiney. And woman-hating. I watch how the young guys are with their women, and they are kind. And supportive. And I don't see a whole lot of fault-finding. As a once-married woman with no kids who never had to do that momma-servant thing, I say maybe some of you self-important Daddy-Os need to cool your jets and get off your high-horse and learn how to be single again, then date. It's start over again at the bottom and work your way up, not stand there and bellow.

Man 40+ = No dam fun at all.
 ~Azul Ojos~
Joined: 7/2/2008
Msg: 46
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/22/2010 4:49:58 PM
I am thinking of doing a similiar study at the dog park tomorrow. Anyone who wants to help tally the legs and numbers is welcome.

JK... of course...
 WasabiGal2
Joined: 1/21/2010
Msg: 47
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Couples 45+
Posted: 10/25/2010 3:55:30 PM
The Farmers Market as the location for this study is not impartial, and probably already screened people.

You're right about getting different results in Texas. Having driven through Texas once, I would say that your observations would be different if you were hanging out at WalMart.

Also, I am not overweight, but am dating an overweight man. Overweight, not obese.
 *topchef*
Joined: 8/2/2008
Msg: 48
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/25/2010 4:54:12 PM
That is quite some observation going on there. 1000s of people over an afternoon.

Let's say for the argument....2000 people, and lets say....a 4 hour afternoon. So on average, you observed, calculated and made judgments on approximately 500 people per hour, or 250 couples per hour, or about 4 couples per minute, giving you little more than 15 seconds to make each assessment and subsequent judgement.

Isnt is possible with the thousands of people there, you were naturally drawn to "certain" people, that you overlooked people who did not fit into the intial premise as it was being formed. I suspect the crowd was a little more mixed in terms of the demographics than you would have us believe.

I go to the local farmer's market every weekend in the summer/fall.....and it is all types, all ages and all flavors of people. Just like the rest of the world we live in.
 WaywardWynde
Joined: 5/19/2007
Msg: 49
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Couples 45+
Posted: 10/25/2010 7:11:09 PM

giving you little more than 15 seconds to make each assessment and subsequent judgement.


Yup, an eternity, including several gulps of coffee and a bite or two on a buttered roll. People specifically telegraph their positions so conclusions can specifically be instantly accurate to all viewing. People WANT you to know who they are.

BTW, the farmer's market at Union Square in Manhattan is in an area of predominately white middle class people. It is a loooooong ways from the effete Upper Eastside, an even longer ways from the (newly) middle class blacks of Harlem and a forever trip for the Hispanics of Washington Heights. It is also a long walk from the weirdo's of the East Village, and too long a walk (with no easy public transportation from the (mostly gay) West Village. It is also a long subway ride from Brooklyn or Queens (which has lower prices anyway) and out of the question for the "bridge and tunnels crowd" from Long Island, New Jersey and Connecticut (difficult to park a car).
 Sabrosura089
Joined: 11/29/2009
Msg: 50
Couples 45+
Posted: 10/25/2010 8:16:44 PM

BTW, the farmer's market at Union Square in Manhattan is in an area of predominately white middle class people. It is a loooooong ways from the effete Upper Eastside, an even longer ways from the (newly) middle class blacks of Harlem and a forever trip for the Hispanics of Washington Heights. It is also a long walk from the weirdo's of the East Village, and too long a walk (with no easy public transportation from the (mostly gay) West Village. It is also a long subway ride from Brooklyn or Queens (which has lower prices anyway) and out of the question for the "bridge and tunnels crowd" from Long Island, New Jersey and Connecticut (difficult to park a car).


^^^The people that reside in the Union Square area may be predominantly Caucasian, but that area is populated on a daily basis with people of all ethnicities. You have the students from NYU, the people who work in the area, etc.................

"weirdos" from the East Village?
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