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| | Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibilityPage 4 of 4 (1, 2, 3, 4) | Hmmmmmmmmm read somewhere that households consisting of just single mom and kid(s) tends to produce homosexual boys. Study said their role model is the mom and thats what they emulate as they grow up.
Must be kind of hard on the kid going thru life knowing he was a hit and run accident. Kids in school can be very cruel when it comes to stuff like that. | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 5/5/2012 7:46:20 AM | Really? You know this how? experience?
My son never gets picked on about his lack of a dad, and with the divorce rate and military being deployed and everything else, it's way more common to have a household with only one parent. My son gets picked on for normal stuff, his clothes not being right (whatever that means), he occasionally sucks his thumb, he says or does dumb things that elicits a response from his peers. He's been asked about his dad, but he's never been teased about it. It's way more common then it should be.
what study? and why is that an issue? Are you a homo-phobe? I've dated a few men raised by only mom.. they were far from homosexual.. trust me.. they were a little more understand then a typical guy, and one knew a lot about hair and nails (his mom was a hair stylist) lol, but he isn't gay.
people are individuals. why do we feel the need to group them all together? Example A is a crappy parent, example B is a great parent, you can't just push them together into one group, they are individuals. Seems most people judge a person in the first few seconds of meeting them. I personally hate the question, where is your child tonight?. Once I told a guy I tied him to a toilet in the bathroom and gave him a water bottle. He told me i'm a bad parent, without knowing anything else about me. I mean come on..Common sense people! Where would you have your child if you went out? That crap about parents shouldn't go out is crap! I remember my parents having date night and leaving us with a sitter, or the neighbors or whoever they deemed good enough, why is it bad that i go out?
You can't say a parent is irresponsible based off observing them for one night while they are out. When I go out, I'm loud, i'm boisterous, I drink, I dance, I hit on men without any intention of bringing them home. I dance some more and usually I'm at karaoke so I sing badly to, and lots of time I sing songs that are inappropriate for children. I do not behave this way if my son is with me, nor do I behave this way at home.(well I might sing appropriate songs badly and dance to them, but you know what i mean lol) Do you? What about at work? I probably miss less days of work then my child-free counterparts, even if I stayed out to late the prior night.
Are all of us like this? No.. but the majority is often silent, it's the minority that screams the loudest.. | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 5/5/2012 1:36:56 PM | | Hey im 23 and a single mum i have a 3 year old daughter i also have a full time job as im a freelance self made beautician. I AGREE that if for any reason that any man/woman becomes a single parent you have to change your entire lifestyle,you have to put your children first the day i had my daughter i had to grow up and be an adult...I now go out about 4 times a years....and if any bloke comes into mine and my daughters life they have to understand that she comes first above everything....rant over :) xxx | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 5/5/2012 10:11:08 PM | s225ironman....
i am 23 years old with 3 sons. a 4 year old and two 1 year old and yes im a single mom. on one hand i agree with u but on the other i think ur an idiot. just cuz u had one bad issue with one single mom doesnt mean were all like that. me for an example... i work, i go to school, and i riase my sons. its not often i get a babysit and i dont mind. i love sitting at home with my kids and watching a movie. but when i do get a babysit i only useally do to go on dates like for supper or a movie. and the odd time i do go to a club is on special occasions or girls nights out. yes i do have a drink or two but i dont get plaster. i rather go to a club and dance then be irresponsible. | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 5/7/2012 9:12:00 AM | | you have thought about this way to much, not all girls are like that some are but most are not, i'm a single mum to my son and i only go out once a month or once every other month, i would rather stay at home with my son then go out, my son is my responsibility, i know a few people that are like that, or just palm there children of to somebody else so they can go out and do what they like, but not all single mummies do that. | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 5/13/2012 3:17:45 PM | While age may play into the maturity level of many single mother's I would also read in between the lines on their profile. I automatically weed matches out due to the type of language, and grammar they use on their profile. This says a lot about how mature you are, and where you are in life- or where you're trying to be.
Age is nothing but a number, and since I fall into this age range, and am a single mother myself, I feel the need to be careful about anyone I may choose to pursue a relationship with. I don't know if the problem is necessarily about being a single mother going out on a regular basis as much as it may be you're just looking for someone who is a little more laid back? | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 5/13/2012 5:16:19 PM | You know what? I don't really think that most guys care WHY you have kids, or how you carry yourself.
There are those few guys who cant mentally stand that you've ever had sex with someone else, and that child is a reminder or whatever. Those guys are weak-minded, you don't want to be with such a person anyway. But most people have the problem with the fact that you have a kid in the first place. Doesnt matter if you partied and got knocked up, or if you planned it with an ex-husband that you planned to be with forever.
You have a kid, that changes the dynamics of what we can do together. My own personal opinion, is I'm not taking a back-burner to the kid, and I'm not competing with the kids either. I do agree that the kid becomes number 1, you have to find someone willing to deal with it. Other than that, its not MY kid, I can't love him/her, and while I am childless, there is no way any resource of mine goes to another man's child, whether that be time, effort, emotion, or money. I haven't done for my own lineage, another's is out of the question.
So basically, if there was a chick who had been 'irresponsibly' living, but didn't have a child from her wild days, I would prefer that over a woman who planned everything responsibly but has a child. | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 5/14/2012 9:21:12 PM | | well that definatley opened my eyes as to why I might be having such a hard time on here! Im a single mom, 33, but I was left by my husband over a year ago and my two children came from him and only him. Im a real person not looking for someone to take care of me just someone to have fun with....all Im saying is Im sorry that you are meeting some crazy girls out there,,,but have some faith because we are not all like that. | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 5/16/2012 7:04:59 PM |
In my opinion, if a woman has children, she should not be going out on a regular basis to get drunk and hook-up with random guys. After all, didn't such a thing lead to them having a child to begin with?
If your first date is going out and getting drunk and hooking up...well a girl who agrees to that kind of date isn't exactly relationship material is she? And a man who suggests that sort of date isn't either. As an FYI....sometimes children are the result of a marriage, and single moms the result of a divorce. | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 5/19/2012 5:32:33 PM | | Thank you NoCretinZone . As a 25 year old with a 3 almost 4 year old I can say from experience that a lot of babies come from long term relationships from where you are actually living with the dad and being a responsible adult with a fultime job who only parties every once in a while. Birth Control isn't 100% effective and the unexpected can still happen even with taking all precautions. | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 5/20/2012 2:43:27 PM | | well i am 24 with 3 from an 8 year relationship which ended in him going else where i dont particularly want anymore so yes every girl is different ive never had a random hook up and thought i was set for life i work and i drive!!! and i only go out about 4 times a year! everyone is different. | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 5/20/2012 3:50:25 PM | | That is a stereotype and while most stereotypes are based at least in part on some amount of truth, not all single mothers are like that. I lived with my son's father and we were married when I got pregnant. My child was not the result of a drunken party night. He wasn't planned but I wasn't so intoxicated that I fathered a child with a stranger. And even if I had, people make mistakes. It's part of life. There are some single mothers who are very responsible. My child is almost 3 and since they were born I have completed a college degree and have started university. I no longer live with his father but I don't live at home either. I work and take on student loans to take care of my child. I pay my own bills and share custody of the child with their father. I rarely go out on nights when I have my child and when I do it's not to get drunk and party. I'm not looking for someone to raise my child because he has a father. If you don't want to date someone with a child or children then don't, but please try not to lump us in these categories and propegate the idea that single mothers are irresponsible and party all the time and are just looking for someone to watch their kids | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 5/24/2012 3:52:37 AM | I am a 24year old single mum to a 3 year old boy who is my world. i think your argument applies only to some women, but trust me not all.
my reasons for joining a dating website have nothing to do with my son, i want to find a special connection for me. if things go well and a few months down the line and i have committed myself to someone, then its inevitable that there will come a point where my son will have to come into the equation.
You should not tar everyone with the same brush... every one is very different. My relationship with my boys father lasted 6 years, childhood sweethearts, it broke down because of his adutery which is something i had no control over...
so to sum it up... you have had one bad experience, but dont let that put you off. everyones different. | |
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| Single mothers, their age, and level of personal responsibility
Posted: 6/8/2012 8:41:22 PM | | ok i am age 23 and i have two kids from a divorce and i spend most my days working and taking care of my kids and i know plenty of other girls that do the same. and i learn from these last years not to date people that are wanting to go out and party all the time and to look for more mature people whom can handle putting their big boy pants on and dealing with those situations like an adult. {btw bc of these stupid comments and men assuming its all up to the woman to deal with this sh*t they can't handle why i decided to come out and dropped guy perm.} FUMEN | |
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