Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financ      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 BrockLee74
Joined: 9/9/2011
Msg: 151
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?Page 7 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
The answer to the topic is simply "no". If he feels like helping out it is by choice, not obligation.
 FlyyinSolo87
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 152
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/13/2011 8:57:44 PM

This is NOT a moral obligation it is more like "Pimp & Whore" and buying someones love

There is a wealthy business 'man' in my town that keeps more than one woman on the side .. He's been doing it for YEARS. Each of the women have children and he pays their rent, buys them cars so he can have sex with them. I have met of 'few' of his 'women' within different social circles at work and casually - and I have no respect for them nor does 1/2 the town.

These women always tend to find 'other' poor schleps who have money & will pamper them, and fool the men into thinking they are 'the only one' they are having sex with! They have 'other' guys on the side too for their own sexual entertainment because their 'sugar daddy's' are not that great in bed or attractive!

I just had a man I was dating dump me for a friggin' retarded reason (his ex wife & his best friend, blah blah blah WTF? ) so he could chase one of the most notorious of these women.... I tried to warn him about her but he didn't listen. He's gonna' have to learn the hard way! The Idiot even introduced her to his Muslim Mother (lol) I can't help but think "You poor bas%''*$ ... you actually THINK you can be PROUD of this one? " DUDE! Your wife cheated with your best friend and now you want the 'whore'? WTF? Guess my telling him of her willingness to have anal sex was a good thing or something?

If you want to be a 'pimp' and have a whore for a girlfriend go for it... it is a free country! You better also pay for their Full Panel STD Test before you sleep with them IMHO. The women I know who do this are not moral people & manipulate manipulate manipulate and take serious risks sexually.

I'd rather work my 40 hrs a week, shop at the dollar store and support myself and go without sex and a man than be someone's whore. Or date a man who has to 'buy' my love


I guess you should be ready to pay for all the dates then, so as not to be sure no man buys your love.

I should also mention that while you're condemning these women for the life they live, and what they do behind closed doors(which is none of your f*cking business anyways), you positively ooze jealousy. Me thinketh you wanted that man to stay as apposed to him going for that dirty anal whore. Don't meddle in other people's lives, nobody likes a busy body, and that's probably why he left you for her.
 QueenBeeSweetness
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 153
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/13/2011 9:04:27 PM
I have to wonder how one would know what type of sex another woman likes, & why they would be discussing it with other people.
 FlyyinSolo87
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 154
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/13/2011 9:08:10 PM
She seems to be one of those women that are all nice and friendly to someone one face to face, acts like a close friend, just to take what they say and use it against them.
 QueenBeeSweetness
Joined: 9/23/2011
Msg: 155
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/13/2011 9:09:34 PM
^^^ i bet you are correct, lol.
 FlyyinSolo87
Joined: 6/15/2011
Msg: 156
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/13/2011 9:13:32 PM
My life may not be long, but I have come in contact with a few too many people like this. I have no need for them, even on the net.
 klc1989
Joined: 12/6/2011
Msg: 157
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/16/2011 1:47:15 PM
There is no obligation to when you are just dating. Though like other people have said, if your living together (sharing expenses) or engaged, then it is a good thing to do, but not an obligation. Now if you get married, that's where it becomes a obligation. But by that point you should want to, not feel like you "have" to do it.
 Dare To Be Happy
Joined: 6/23/2008
Msg: 158
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/16/2011 2:10:36 PM
I sooooo agree with banana197! Women who expect their "date" to help her support her kids obviously don't want to work or don't know how to take care of their responsibilities. I am a single mom and I just bought my own home, own my own car, put food, clothes, toys etc. for my kids. I DON'T NEED a man to support me and i sure don't NEED a man to support my kids. I do Fine by my damn self pardon the french
 ontario_woman
Joined: 4/3/2005
Msg: 159
view profile
History
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/16/2011 2:18:23 PM
I agree with the other posters. Providing for my daughter is my responsibility. That is not to say that he can't provide the occasional small gift or ice cream for her as the relationship progresses,but the primary responsibility for providing for her is upon my shoulders; not his.
 gothicgirl86
Joined: 4/11/2011
Msg: 160
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/16/2011 7:34:59 PM
Um No the man doesn't and if one told me that I'd dump him on the spot. I work full-time with four kids; I don't an obligation owed to me. I do just fine myself.
 fishpizza
Joined: 11/6/2011
Msg: 161
view profile
History
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/18/2011 12:28:49 PM
my ex is now dating a guy exclusively and i would feel really weird about him providing for her financially. we both struggle but manage to take care of ourselves and our kid just fine, thats what you gotta do if your gonna have a kid. it doesnt matter whether your a man or a woman married or divorced having a kid is a responsibility that you chose to accept. look at it this way if a women decides to date a single father wouldnt it sound crazy to assume that she would now be responsible to pay him for that privilege? were living in a new age where we should be able to appreciate all the struggles that women have gone through in the last 100 years, they didnt do it for nothing! i can certainly appreciate it from the point of view that i didnt chose my gender (pretty sure noone on earth can make that claim) and if i had been born female i would be pissed if i didnt have equal rights. however lets not forget equal rights= equal responsibility. ANY differential treatment because of gender by definition is inequality.
 Flurr
Joined: 4/24/2010
Msg: 162
view profile
History
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/19/2011 7:05:35 AM
This is BY FARRRRR! the most ridiculous thread I have ever seen on any website for any topic in my entire life. Hands down. No doubt about it. This isn't an old fashion opinion. Actually I think it is very very shallow to think that you can put a dollar figure on a relationship like this, it really does disgust me that somebody would even think like this. Its funny you said single mother and not single father and assumed the converse either isn't possible or a women shouldn't provide for the man with kids. i hope this thread gets deleted. Ughhh
 Flurr
Joined: 4/24/2010
Msg: 163
view profile
History
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/19/2011 7:20:43 AM
I hope everyone read his profile. This guy has a few screws loose for sure.
 Euroalex
Joined: 2/20/2007
Msg: 164
view profile
History
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/19/2011 7:40:53 AM

The answer to the topic is simply "no". If he feels like helping out it is by choice, not obligation.


well, the correct answer is
"different culture have different moral standards, and these are also changing by time...."
 MOTORCYCLEMAN4U
Joined: 2/12/2008
Msg: 165
view profile
History
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/23/2011 2:59:11 PM
He didn't have the fun their father should help not him.
 xMs_Nicolax
Joined: 12/5/2011
Msg: 166
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/24/2011 3:55:34 AM
I havent read the replies so apologise if Im repeating what someone has already said. I for one would be insulted if someone felt they needed to financially support my children I do this adequately on my own they also have a dad who has a responsibility to support them.
 wildlifelover1979
Joined: 2/11/2011
Msg: 167
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/24/2011 1:14:34 PM
I don't have this problem because I don't date with kids. Don' t want to see the father's face or be near him! Why should I have to pay for some kid that is not mine any way? That includes buying food, etc.

Now on the other hand I would do it if there was no man paying for bills and he wasn't apart of his life period. Basically the woman has to prove the guy is not paying and isn't apart of his life.
 Pink_Roses_1
Joined: 8/17/2009
Msg: 168
view profile
History
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/25/2011 7:45:46 AM
There has only been two times in my life that I expected a man to HELP provide for my daughter. The first one being her father, which he didn’t do until he faced with no other choice but jail. The second was long term relationship in which we lived together and he did it freely on his own. He felt it was his obligation to step up.
 sortofmaybe
Joined: 11/26/2011
Msg: 169
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/25/2011 2:38:16 PM
OP: are you nuts? If someone would like to help out of their own free will then perhaps....but be under any obligation to....never.

I wouldn't be able to let someone I was dating provide for my children, it's not their place, no matter how well intentioned. The whole idea of it freaks me out !
 wildandfreee
Joined: 12/16/2010
Msg: 170
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/25/2011 7:20:22 PM
hey John
'him helping her with her expenses is the least he can do '
I think money issues have to be discuss between you and her, how much both earn and how you two want to spend your income as you are exclusive
'i feel he owes it to her'
to my understanding its like she doesnt want a man , you only need a woman
 Jdadd
Joined: 12/6/2011
Msg: 171
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/25/2011 9:41:44 PM
No i dont agree with you. You should not fill obligated to pay for someone elses shild. thats what child support is for. And if someone expects you to pay for there child, then while can.
 Imclassique
Joined: 12/2/2011
Msg: 172
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/26/2011 10:15:44 PM
Frankly he should help her in many ways, financially assist the family in some areas such as recreational persuits and holidays etc,and the mother to evenings out and treats as any relationship should and rightfully so.
why stigmatise her because she has adorable babies.
If you would date a solo woman you would do that too so why discriminate because she comes whih a beautiful family.
I find this rather hurtful demoralising and rather rude,
If the man has a good relationship with her and her children it is the right thing to do.
She should set her sights higher and dump him if he is using her.
If he does not want to assist her and ease her struggle then he should not date a woman with a family and frankly he needs to grow up.
 Tealwood
Joined: 12/16/2008
Msg: 173
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/27/2011 5:26:05 AM

Frankly he should help her in many ways, financially assist the family in some areas such as recreational persuits and holidays etc,and the mother to evenings out and treats as any relationship should and rightfully so.
why stigmatise her because she has adorable babies.
If you would date a solo woman you would do that too so why discriminate because she comes whih a beautiful family.


I think the idea is based on what a poster so passionately discussed in a different forum....freedom of choice ....on can choose to date a single parent and the children who are part of the package....or they can choose not to assume the added issues and or liabilities that are easily understood.



She should set her sights higher and dump him if he is using her.
If he does not want to assist her and ease her struggle then he should not date a woman with a family and frankly he needs to grow up.


Poster type!

Perhaps the guy is the one who should have set his sights higher and not started going out with the individual in question who has children and is incapable of upholding their own responsibilities and requires someone else to pick up their financial requirements.

But then I see you list study as an occupation....so self reliance might not be a big issue for you?

Perhaps your handle is well named...Im Classic....as in I will be looking for a meal ticket to take care of me? from your own profile!


I am commencing study soon so I can be independent as I want to travel and live abroad, I want to come to Europe and the U.K, find a superb person and live happily ever after.


Now my own preference would be to find a woman who is self reliant and self supporting who can handle her own financial obligations while I handle my own financial obligations...but then life is a series of lessons.....and I was always brought up with the premise that woman were equally capable or should have the same opportunities or one should have the same rules and expectations for each gender....and all I see here ...is a case of special consideration and special rules because I am woman...I am woman with children?
 mftljs316
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 174
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/27/2011 6:20:47 AM
No!!!! a woman who has kids should not accept financial help from someone she is "dating". I am a single mom of 2 kids and I would never accept money or allow a man I was dating to pay my bills. It makes a woman seem like that is the only reason to have a man in her life. It is the father of the child(ren) responsibility to help support the child, not some random boyfriend, even if it is a commited relationship. If the boyfriend wanted to pay for dinners out or pay for dates, then that is perfectly acceptable.
If the relationship has moved forward and they live together then of course the guy should pay his fair share of the living expenses.
 zink6122
Joined: 12/18/2011
Msg: 175
If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?
Posted: 12/27/2011 6:24:04 PM
I personally love dating women with kids because I genuinely like to help provide for her and her kids. That's just my natural, ancient alpha male programming. With that said though, I also won't be taken advantage of. She would have to prove herself to be a rather spectacular woman who cares for her kids and is trying to make something of herself.

If a man knows she has kids, he can't reasonably expect not to help her. Like you said, it is a moral obligation, not necessarily a required one. I think any REAL man will help.
Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > If a guy is dating a girl who has kids, should he help her out financially?