| | Guys who say Call me in their first messagePage 7 of 10 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10) | | I agree, I had had so many experiences with men who just want to chat online, then it takes forever to really know who they are and what they are like in person because they are still "wanting to know you first", so now I always put on my profile, "no penpals", if you are really serious, we can chat online once or twice and the third time you better be ready to call me on the phone, after that, if you sound good and you pass my "background" test then, we will meet, this whole process can take as soon as four days or a week, but I won't waste my time and your time prolonging a meeting in person. I had had a few men who also emailed me and left their phone numbers for me to call them, each time I emailed back and told them..."I do not call people, people call me". Then I waited for their response and see what they would say, most of the time they didn't respond and the once that did, said they were sorry!Lol I only answer emails when I read their profiles and I see what type of men they are, if they share my same ideals, I usually give them a fair chance, it all depends on how they answer my questions and how they sound on the phone, you can learn alot from a person if you pay attention to how they respond to your questions and their tone of voice...Well, that is my take on this, all I want is to meet the love of my life and to get out of POF for good! | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/1/2012 8:16:11 PM | | I never call them cold like that. In general I really don't like communicating through the phone. When I get a message like that I either assume that the guy is desparate or has another thing in mind. The Idea of calling a guy I don't know well or even at all is creepy. the line may work for some but not for me. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/1/2012 9:49:40 PM | It's a total turn off for me.
They don't even know my name, they don't even take the time to let me know they even read my profile. If all I get is "call me xxx-xxx-xxxx" I just block them, I think it's too weird.
I often wonder what if I did call them? Maybe I will sometime and make them guess which who I am - since I am sure guys mass email this ridiculous line.
If a guy walked up to me in a public place and just handed me his number, I'd feel the same way. At least when you get a number in person, you usually get a chance to feel them out first. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/2/2012 6:27:23 AM | I give out my google-voice number if I am interested to get to know a guy, it is safe for me and I can have a first impression. Email is just not that effective for me to determine if I would like to meet - because of my language and cultural barrier (I have to get used to the American way of dating  ) understanding and getting a vibe is easier on the phone.
With all this technology now its safe easy and convenient 
As for the -To bad you live in...- I would take it as a compliment - why not write something nice if you see it. I would give a compliment to a stranger if he dresses nice, that doesn't have to mean I want to date him  Just means I am able to see and acknowledge beauty when I see it....Life is much more fun and happiness that way  | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/2/2012 9:42:20 AM | | Some do it for dirty chat. Some like me will do it because they want to know if it a real woman or if it is one of these peoplethat want to send you to pay sites. Or after talking to you for a while they tell you they need mony fast because they are trapped in whereever wben every one know go to an embasy and if you are really in need you can get a free plane ticket home. I have meet too many scammers and talking to people helps figure out what type of person they are and if youand sbe wush to go further.most cell phones can block numbers these days so its no big deal. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/2/2012 9:46:25 AM | But one type of message that makes me wonder about what they were thinking is when a guy says "hello, my name is so and so, I liked your profile, my number is___Call me." They are just cruising around sending these messages to every new woman in your area, checking to see how stupid you are. You call him and right away he's sure your stupid and will be easy to get in the sack. This type of guy is after sex and nothing else. A true pig. If you are looking for anything more reasonable, more rational or less disgusting in these messages, you won't find it, unless you are delusional. jmho.
When we were kids/young (mid 20's) adults before cell phone were popular, we gave someone we were interesting in our number You didn't just walk up to someone you'd never met or talked to, handed them your number and rudely said "call me." Or, if you did, what a loser thing to do. If people met and talked, they might give out a phone number, but that is not what the OP is referring to. She is describing a first email contact wherein the woman has not even responded. There has been no correspondence, no contact. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/2/2012 4:59:05 PM | | oh women do the same thing fran morris a perfect example, I'll call you, never call for days after talking for weeks, I'm busy, of course I did'nt realize she was a hooker selling her ass in the bars, a drunk so be careful calling people, you should try to get to know each other alittle first, apparently for more then weeks I guess | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/8/2012 6:13:05 PM | What IS the big deal about this!!!!
Everyone is different and every time you connect with someone on here its different...If after a couple of emails the guys asks for your number or gives you his it dont mean he is desperate or just after sex!!! Jeesh where on Earth do you figure that out?
Personally after a couple of emails then yes I want to go voice either via an Internet link or by phone - They can ring me and withhold their number its not a massive step to make. If I meet someone in a bar and we chat then we might exchange numbers so what is the problem here? I want to talk not exchange endless emails ...Im not asking for an address, your DNA or your bank details I just want to chat with you like I would with anyone else....
Normally within five mins of a chat you are either laughing and joking, maybe exchanging views on anything from the state of the nation to the fun places to go locally.... or the conversation dies - In which case one of you politely makes and excuse to end the call and saves you both the time and effort sending 20 more emails only to discover what you have now found out - Its not going to go anywhere.
But pleaseeee get the off the idea that guys who want to talk are weird, desperate or in need of therapy - If anyone needs help its the ones that want to spend six months in an email relationship! | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/8/2012 8:23:51 PM | | Then when you have met them and you give them your phone number, all they do is text. Don't know about any other women, but I'm just not intersted in having a texting relationship. Been there, done that and wouldn't do it again. Too much lost in texting. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/8/2012 8:31:34 PM | i've had several attractive women give me their phone number on the first email and i make the call.
i'm not chicken and i appreciate the fact that they aren't either. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/8/2012 8:43:52 PM | | I don't call a guy if they put call me in their first message. It's weird to call someone who you have never talked to through at least a few messages first. I actually never call people off this site. I would rather meet in person before calling. I'm quite awkward on the phone. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/8/2012 8:56:20 PM | Well, I could see if two people had been exchanging emails back and forth for a little bit, and then numbers are exchanged. But, to send the first message with a phone number? That just shows that a) It's a cut and paste email b) They don't have either the patience or interest in getting to know you, so why would you bother? c)Who knows if you two will click?
I would prefer the man to call, but I have called, or rather,sent a text on occasion first if they give me their number. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/8/2012 11:25:13 PM | I never call them cold like that. In general I really don't like communicating through the phone. When I get a message like that I either assume that the guy is desparate or has another thing in mind.
Note to self: When contacting this person I MUST use smoke signals or Morse code..
They don't even know my name, they don't even take the time to let me know they even read my profile.
Isn't this usually solved by the guy saying. "Hi, I liked your profile, so what was your name again?" ?
b) They don't have either the patience or interest in getting to know you, so why would you bother? c)Who knows if you two will click?
People that make me curious: Chicks that can "click" virtually over email, but fail over a glass of wine at a bistro..
Stop the planet, I want off this goofy rollercoaster ride.. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/9/2012 12:40:26 PM | | I too get that...why would I call a guy I dont even know??? then they have ur number and call constantly...to me it sounds desparate, but then again, maybe they want to hear your voice instead of messaging bk and forth. I dont call them i ignore. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/9/2012 4:04:34 PM | | Oh I so know that! They will always get my long very long message as to why they obviously are clueless. If a guy doesn't understand life and women better than that, then they are a waste of time. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/9/2012 9:59:05 PM | I tend to be forward about swapping numbers not because i am looking to get laid but because it is already a time-investment process of elimination.
For me it also helps weed out those who are too shy and probably otherwise incompatible.
Some people don't like jumping onto the phone but i have found many do.
Throwing your number in someones face on the first message? umm no that is inappropriate i agree.
But after a conversation is going well i don't hesitate to offer my number.
To each there own!!! | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/9/2012 10:00:30 PM | "I have found that they generally want to "get with you" and quick like or they want to sext'."
and that is the other thing...what's with the whole sexting or phone sex right away when you haven't even met the person?
i think that men who do this are sending out a mass email with their phone number in it. i think it is some sort of "throw it against the wall and see what sticks" tactic. it's a number game. they figure if they send out x number of blanket canned messages with a phone number that evetually some naive woman will call them.. it's really gross...ugh! | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/10/2012 4:25:46 AM | Why must she be naive?
I tend to wonder about people that can only communicate behind a keyboard. I wonder how many women here take their laptops on dates so they can talk to the person on the other side of the table.. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/10/2012 8:03:52 AM | | Granted a 1st email is a little pushy. But try to understand it from a guys point of view. Too many women are overly skittish & no matter how polite, long, short or many emails are exchanged, never muster enough courage to meet. Offering our number is a means to an end, to take her seriously if she's truly looking to date or maybe just online seeking attention. Contrary to popular belief there are more women game players online than men. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/10/2012 6:05:25 PM | | Thank you so much for posting this! Just today I was really upset by someone who wanted to go right to the phone. I politely explained that I prefer to exchange a few emails then go to the phone..just my preference. I said that I respect his preference and understood how he felt. I wished him luck in his search. Figured that would be it. Instead I got ATTACKED! This total stranger wrote back to tell me that I am single because I push people off, that I would be alone forever or get divorced again...etc! And then told me he was blocking me!! I was floored!! I have had several men who want to go right to the phone. I am not comfortable with that. I like to get a sense of who the person is thru email first. It may not be perfect but it works for me. The few times I went against my better judgement and went right to the phone was not good. Today I was thinking maybe there is something wrong with me, but after reading your post and the responses...I feel better and confident in my approach! Thank you!! And stick to your guns. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/10/2012 6:28:35 PM | ^^^^^^ Instead I got ATTACKED! This total stranger wrote back to tell me that I am single because I push people off, that I would be alone forever or get divorced again...etc! And then told me he was blocking me!! I was floored!!
Yes, Virginia, there are immature children on this public site pretending to be adults. You will run into some of them. Just think what it must be like to be a politician, with all the crap thrown at them from all sides, eh? Time to grow a thick skin and move on to the next one. | |
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| Guys who say Call me in their first message
Posted: 1/10/2012 7:39:04 PM | | I've never given my number in a first message, nor had one sent to me. Like someone said though, I get bogus email addresses sent to me from scammers all the time though. Strangely enough, not here, but constantly on Matchdoctor. | |
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