| | Angry DatersPage 3 of 5 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5) | screw it, i am oficially one of those angry daters.
I seriously spent like 5 hours tonight reading through profiles and emailing the women in my area only to get unread deleted or verbally abused by the women I emailed.
Women wonder why they cant find a nice guy????
I will give you a hint...
You can only poke a bear so long before the bear turns around and wants to rip your head off.
I seriously dont get why people post here when they are already in a relationship or just post for shits and giggles. Isnt that what facebook and twitter is for?
I signed up and payed the membership fees because I thought this was a dating site.
Guess I was wrong. | |
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facess
| | Joined: 11/17/2011
Msg: 52 | |
| Angry Daters
Posted: 2/8/2012 3:20:42 AM | | Angry daters are people with very little patients, just keep at it and the nice in you will attract someone special that's looking for a nice guy, so if you're gonna be angry, stay there only a minute, don't waste a day there. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 2/8/2012 3:29:40 AM |
screw it, i am oficially one of those angry daters.
I seriously spent like 5 hours tonight reading through profiles and emailing the women in my area only to get unread deleted or verbally abused by the women I emailed.
Women wonder why they cant find a nice guy????
I will give you a hint...
You can only poke a bear so long before the bear turns around and wants to rip your head off.
I seriously dont get why people post here when they are already in a relationship or just post for shits and giggles. Isnt that what facebook and twitter is for?
I signed up and payed the membership fees because I thought this was a dating site.
Guess I was wrong.
Easygoingguy1974. The key to this site is to not take it seriously. Every dating site is like that. I find a lot of people (both sexes) just window shop. Reading the forums and the complaints confirms that. There are a few gems here and there. They are well hidden and sometimes you will miss them. They may be someone who doesn't look like anything special or is exceptionally good looking. Could be someone you always knew. You don't ever know actually, that's part of the problem. Once again, don't take this site seriously at all, or any other site. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 2/8/2012 3:50:08 AM | Well Lukas, I do take it seriously. I didnt sign on here to play games or pay money to read profiles of people that are already in relationships or simply here to get a free dinner. I actually paid to be a member. Sadly, not until after I paid did I come to realize that not a single woman in my area is a paying member.
No offense to you, But I am 37 years old. I didnt sign on here to play games. I signed on here and paid for a membership to meet some women in my area in the hopes of finding someone for a long term relationship. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 2/8/2012 3:06:28 PM | | I understand. I'm not that far off your age either but this is the wrong site to give money to. Lots of window shoppers here and I find the profiles aren't as accurate as one thinks. I don't play games either and am actually looking for something. But looking for something serious has frustrations so therefore you have to learn not to take it seriously. I've been on a dating site that costs a lot more than here and same thing. It is the internet and quite a few people have a fake persona. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 2/8/2012 10:52:25 PM | Don't worry lucasz, when women get to be in the 50's and still on this site god knows how many years and still have no luck still looking for to fit her needs, they will lower their standards and pursue you. What they say is what they don't mean such as ''not into playing games'' ''not looking for one thing only'' ''no drama'' ''who is fun, lovable, honest, sincere, caring, compassionate'' I agree what they are looking for and not looking for, when i answer ''YES'' to all, they will not respond. Women do the talk, but won't do the walk. If you disagree with me, proof me wrong why not go out with lucasz?
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 2/9/2012 10:28:01 AM |
Don't worry lucasz, when women get to be in the 50's and still on this site god knows how many years and still have no luck still looking for to fit her needs, they will lower their standards and pursue you. What they say is what they don't mean such as ''not into playing games'' ''not looking for one thing only'' ''no drama'' ''who is fun, lovable, honest, sincere, caring, compassionate'' I agree what they are looking for and not looking for, when i answer ''YES'' to all, they will not respond. Women do the talk, but won't do the walk. If you disagree with me, proof me wrong why not go out with lucasz?
Lowered expectation, really? If you believe for someone to be interested in you they need to lower their expectation then it's time to do personal inventory. I think that is the root of the problem with the angry dater, they believe everyone must change to meet their wants, needs and desires.
I went through a period where I wasn't attracting the type of man I'm accustom to dating and my first thought was to blame being over 40, to blame men for being shallow. Then I looked at myself. I was a workaholic, all I did was work, all my interests revolved around work and my appearance was less then stellar. I wouldn't even want to date myself.
Dating to me is like retail commerce. You have sell yourself, honestly. And you have to watch for sales that too good to be true because they usually are. And you have to be the best version of yourself you can be.
And get offline. When you're really living life and enjoying it, people will seek you out. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 2/9/2012 10:35:50 AM |
After reading some of these threads I came to the conclusion misandry and misogyny run rampant in the over 30 dating world. I don't understand how these kind people date..seriously who dates them?
That's easy. Other angry daters. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 2/9/2012 10:37:24 AM | | Misery loves company as they say. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 2/14/2012 3:57:31 PM | Yeep. Then they move in together, abuse each other, he gets her pregnant and they make a bunch of kids who grow up with angry hateful parents, and repeat every 20-30 years. Explains a lot, doesn't it?
 for Ms. Beave! | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 2/14/2012 5:06:52 PM | The modern dating scene is an emotionally disconnected sea of lies where the emphasis is on "hook ups" ( both men AND women).
Is it any wonder people are bitter and angry when everything is not as it seems. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 3/16/2012 12:36:13 PM |
Dating to me is like retail commerce. You have sell yourself, honestly. And you have to watch for sales that too good to be true because they usually are. And you have to be the best version of yourself you can be.
While I don't think that it should all be reduced to tangible commerce or mounting an efficient marketing campaign, it is a huge step in the right direction. It means that acknowledging the needs of the other party (the customer) does matter - something that most people are loathe to do. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 3/16/2012 2:37:37 PM |
Any man worth his salt who would go out with a woman who "lowered her standards" in order not to be alone, is welcome to her. And vice versa. IMO.
Also? We can seem to possess all the attributes someone is looking for and STILL not hit it off together, true enough? A guy could be looking for a 5'4ish, blue eyed brunette who highlights her hair, loves to cook, loves to read, etc etc., and find me dull and dry as day-old toast. Just because someone appears to have on "paper" everything we desire or favor doesn't mean it's a go.
Quite unfortunately. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 3/17/2012 4:24:39 PM | Actually, that is the person I am looking for!! Seriously. People like that are genuine and have depth. They can hold a conversation and don't try to be a huuuuge bore. I love a guy I can sit with and he will, like me, gripe about how people are stupid and selfish, etc. We will also talk about just how lame dating is. Oh, let's go to a movie or lunch or whatever, 2 or 3 times a week - boring. Like a second job , ugh.
Where are those people? If you know of any angry daters let me know! Kindred spirits. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 3/20/2012 5:51:19 AM | For some reason, an ex of mine got angry at me because I no longer wished to see her, because she misspelled a word. She said I was being to (peeky)picky for some reason.  I wonder if she is still misspelling that word.... | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 3/31/2012 9:22:40 AM | What is more distrubing if the women who set certain expectations that have to be met by the guy? If he does not meet them she quits talking to him. I am talking about the women who put a profile up that say you must fit this description with these interest and hobbies, likes/dislikes and you must make at least this amount of money and not live with parents. You know who you are! Those are the women that are losers and stuck up. Those are the ones that end up in mulitple divorces and having kids wihout daddies.
For example this one girl I went to grade, middle, high school with, Would not get the time of day in middle and high school! Would not date? I saw her 10 years after graduation and she was divorced twiced with 4 kids from 3 guys and still refused to go on a date with me saying we had nothing in common and she hated guys. She said would never date or get married again and she is 32 years old with 4 kids. Quite sad that women do this! | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 3/31/2012 9:42:40 AM | Being in any condition (anger, drowsiness, even happiness, etc|) clouds instinctual judgement, doesn't it?
However nobody is ever in a clear state of mind...well, maybe Buddha.
A person can't stay angry for the rest of his/her life. Jaded? Maybe.
Truth is, it's difficult to date in modern days - it's not all fine and easy like in romantic comedies. What makes it possible comes only with timing, and maybe a little fate/destiny/whatever it's called in your dictionary. And that, everyone, is harder than winning the lottery.
In the meantime, don't give up hope  | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 3/31/2012 9:53:54 AM | | I've seen women with all types of men and the mismatches (at least on the surface) continually astound me. Some women seem to enjoy sarcastic, put-down personalities, even when they're the target of some of the scorn, because it somehow demonstrates "wittiness" and intelligence. It's "sexy" to some women. How I can't fathom. To me there's nothing redeeming about the behavior. If you like it go see some insult comic. They do it for a living. But to be around it every day in a relationship setting is toxic and unhealthy. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 3/31/2012 2:12:09 PM |
Women can get away with a profile that pushes people away
Such a double standard.
That's why we probably see more men in the "profile critique" section of this site than women, right?  | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 3/31/2012 3:48:46 PM | | I read alot of women profiles on here that have to meet certain standards. They way they write their profile it sounds like they are mad at the world. It is either my way or the highway attitude. Advice for women like that: Guys don't like that at all! My father does this to me all the time and it upsets me. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 3/31/2012 4:13:27 PM | You got me on who dates them. I know when I have the misfortune of running into them unaware that they're so full of anger and resentment towards my species I can't run fast enough to my car.
Maybe we can get all the angry daters together to date each other? That way they can ensure that each other stays extraordinarily miserable as they seem to want anyways. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 3/31/2012 4:55:10 PM |
Women can get away with a profile that pushes people away
actually, they can't, because no high-quality man has to settle for a bitter, low-quality woman. | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 3/31/2012 7:58:00 PM | Window shopping - you're absolutely right.
I had my first meet, after about six weeks of being a member here and on two other sites - one that's free and named after the little winged guy of Greek and Roman mythology, and another that's all about making matches for adults, which is a paid subscription.
The paid site is where I found this lady.
She has now ended her online dating experiment precisely because too many people are window shopping. Time-wasters, they're called. She called them self-validators. People who get off on sending a flirtatious, anonymous message, or receiving one. Getting a compliment for a picture that's really 5 years old. They don't want to meet because they're either too lazy or simply not what they present themselves as. It's enough for them to have someone give them a self-esteem boost by simply acknowledging them. This means they're forever stuck in the online dating envrionment, wearing down the stamina of the intrepid souls who actually venture online to actually meet someone with ostensibly matching interests.
Once you wade through these idiots, and block them, you are down to the few people who actually are here to meet. I think this means you have a few weeks of work to go through to sift through the time-wasters before you now can see new members, and these are the ones you then need to profile to see if they match.
I think a paid site, for this reason, is much more likely to get you results. Idiots who are only pretending they're someone you can actually meet and have a relationship with are much more likely to infest a site that doesn't hit their hip pocket for the privilege.
As for angry daters, I think anyone over the age of 30 has experienced some irrational bullshit from a former partner. That's life. There is a thing called the Reticular Activation System in the brain which essentially is a feedback system. You notice things you are looking for, and because you notice them, it reinforces them. Try it out - go looking for yellow cars. You'll see thousands. Or "For Lease" signs for commercial real estate. You never even notice it but it's there, and once you see it you can't stop seeing it. Well, your brain does the same thing in all aspects of your life, including relationships. The reason bigots feel justified in their bigotry is that they constantly see their views affirmed. They just don't realise their RAS is focussing on the thing they're looking for.
Men and women who have been f*cked around look for, and see, signs of the same behaviors manifesting themselves in new and potential partners. This is what we call baggage. It's fair enough, too - there are a lot of stupid men out there and a lot of stupid women, too. Half the population has an IQ at or below 100, and 100 isn't all that bright to begin with. It's an uphill battle. So it's fair enough to say you're not interested in this or that, it's fair enough to cull from your list those people who you think are going to prove incompatible. What's not reasonable is wild demands and assumptions.
I don't understand, for instance, why either men or women think they are going to find a stunningly attractive partner who is beautiful in soul and spirit and who shares their interests in a dating site. Those people have no difficulty finding partners. The beautiful people who are still single post-30 are either divorcees who are not interested in the night scene, or shut-ins. Both of these categories of people are going to have baggage. Men do cop the rough end of the pineapple when it comes to divorce, so some bitterness should not be surprising. Women who have wasted a decade or more "being good" and want to let their hair down do exist. So men expecting to get laid easily are not animals. It doesn't mean they're only after one thing - and even if they were, so what? People are free to live their own preferences.
If you're sick of having your time wasted by incompatible people, then put clearly on your profile both what you are looking for, and what you are not looking for. People who should not be on your radar will be offended enough not to bother sending you a message. This is a good thing for both parties. I like it when bitter, jaded ****es complain in their profiles. It tells me to steer clear of them. As my grandfather used to say, "beware the afflicted".
The reason, ladies, why men bemoan that women are idiots who only seem to want to date bad guys or rich guys is because it's a fair comment for a lot of women. Guys, the reason women call us emotionally crippled sex robots is because for plenty of us, it's true. But both miss the point - there's only a narrow spectrum of people who actually meet your preferences. It makes no sense to complain about the others, but that's what all this thread is about.
If you're a nice guy who can't seem to attract a woman, then you're kidding yourself. The women who will go for a guy like you are out there, but apparently they're not the kind of women you go for, because if they were, you'd be with one of them and not single and looking. So have an honest look at yourself and see what it is about you that is so unappealing to the kind of women you like. Fix those things. But be careful what you wish for; you just might get it.
If you resolve the shallow reasons why you're lonely, and that works, then you're attracting women for shallow reasons only. Are those women actually going to give you fulfilment? What happens if a hotter guy wanders into her path? She'll leave you for him, because that's what shallow people do. What is it about that paradigm that you find so attractive?
And women - if you really do despise the get-laid games men play, why the hell are you still pursuing the shallow guys with a cute smile? Why are you still basing your choices on visual, shallow cues rather than actually being what you're pretending to be - thoughtful and deep - and actually choose a guy who is actually what you're pretending to look for? | |
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 4/1/2012 7:57:52 AM | I've always been watchful that I don't turn into an angry dater.
I guess it never comes to that because I never initiate anything with someone new if I don't feel 100%.
In my long membership on here, I have put my profile on hiatus or posted quite honestly that I am not ready at this time to see new people again.
One of my new year's resolutions is to never let the new girl suffer any of the old sins of the past relationships. New dates deserve a clean slate.
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| Angry Daters
Posted: 4/1/2012 11:18:18 AM | Well one of my old housemates was a violent angry man, And I mean it he was scum. But I never ever was him single in all the time he lived with us.
So yes even angry daters can find people. maybe women with self confindence issues date them, or daddy issues, or who are attracted to violence etc. | |
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