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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 8:59:25 AM | Ya know what... That OP was a good guy, doing life and work that benefits society greatly... It is sad he got run off here... He even said he paid for dates, and supported himself... I feel sad about it to be honest. Little disgusted by some of the responses on this post.. Just sad...
vvvv Exactly what I'm talking about... Did you read this thread?! He is running an Not for profit organization for autistic children. You should be ashamed by your response... Ashamed! | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 9:00:06 AM | no money and looking for love?
excuse me for pointing this out, but you should be looking for a job right now, love can come later.
love does not pay the rent !!! | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 10:15:03 AM | Ya know what... That OP was a good guy, doing life and work that benefits society greatly... It is sad he got run off here... He even said he paid for dates, and supported himself...
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He also said this: It really isn't an asset problem (I have many thousands of dollars of artwork hanging on my walls. Which may have to be sold off to finance the NPO.) :<
It's more like a cash flow issue. Poor not destitute.
Going broke to finance a Non-Profit Organization doesn't make sense. It should be dissolved if it is no longer self-supporting through contributions from multiple sponsors. Sounds like he's the only one supporting it. Maybe his next question would have been "would you like to make a contribution." I wonder how people would have responded to that. Interesting responses though. | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 11:49:01 AM |
Going broke to finance a Non-Profit Organization doesn't make sense. It should be dissolved if it is no longer self-supporting through contributions from multiple sponsors. Sounds like he's the only one supporting it.
This is also the impression I get. Unless someone is independently wealthy, and can therefore pay for everything out of one's own pocket indefinitely, somewhere along the line he has to be able to fundraise - or there will be no longevity to the cause. Being non-profit does not mean he has to work for free, as it's not unreasonable to pay key people a modest salary. One won't (and shouldn't) get rich running an NPO, that's true; but one is also not expected to starve to death while trying to save the world.
OP, if you are still lurking...
I disagree when you say you should "forget about finding someone until I can get my finances in order". Sure, I'm all for making more money so you have more options and better odds, but why not live in the here & now and work with what you've got? Someday, when you have accumulated what you perceive to be enough money, you may still not be able to find true love. What will your excuse be then? | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 12:55:06 PM | If you have to spend money to get love....wait and see what it's going to cost you to keep it! | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 1:02:59 PM | I'm late to the party. . . But I dont think you need to be rolling in the dough to date. So you run a nonprofit. So you're broke. There's still plenty of things you can do to have fun. Make dinner together. Exercise. Have sex. Watch movies. Play cards. Fundraise for your group.
Don't give up. The right one is out there. | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 1:10:40 PM | Love doesn't pay the bills, doesn't pay the rent, love doesn't put food on the table, clothes on our backs, clear our money debts, and give us a job. Sorry to say this but everything adds up in life. Most females ( not all ) want the man who's debt free, has goals and a future in life, makes sure you have a retirement account, wants marriage, wants kids, wants the house, wants a car, has a good job and etc. If you want to be the man females are looking for, you have to make changes within yourself to better suit you and women that YOU'RE looking for.
There are other people who in a roommate situations and cant afford the rent living out on their own. OP if you have 1 roommate ( which I have right now, and he's out all the time ) making time and privacy will work out. But in later stages when you're with the lady you're dating decide to be serious. Step up to the plate and move out and both of you find a place and live together. | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 1:20:10 PM | Oh no, the sweetheart has left?  I was just going to find out where he was from incase I could set him up with someone worthy.
Shame is right, Grrr! | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 4:08:22 PM | | You know, what you say is true in some respects (more so when we were young and idealistic), but while I'm not looking for a millionnaire, I want someone who has a job, is responsible and yes, makes decent money. I don't want to go backwards, I want move ahead. This probably comes from my experience as always having money and over the last six yrs. being living just about on the poverty line. It isn't pleasant. Just saying, money IS important, as crass as it may sound. If you love that man, it's never about money. | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 4:27:13 PM | | Sorry, but why do you use the term "gold diggers"? No one wants to get involved with more money issues than herself. I still offer to pay my part of a meal (most men decline), but don't call people like me gold diggers. It's very derogatory and insensitive. | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 5:44:52 PM | LOL I`m with the OP. Poor but not destitute. When I date, I usually pay as well. But I`m far from rich. But like anything else in life, a relationship should be 50/50. If I start dating a woman, I expect her to have the same views as me on momey, and that is we are there to help each other, 50/50. I buy her gifts, she buys me gifts. Sometimes I cant, sometimes she can`t. Its okay, as long as there is mutual understanding.
NEVER AGAIN will I pay everything in a home while a woman I date has no job, lives with me, goes to school and gives me crap for not buying her 200 dollars a week worth of cosmetics. That`s done, and its OVER.
The right woman will understand and I hope appreciate that fact. | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 6:02:44 PM | " So you're broke. There's still plenty of things you can do to have fun. Make dinner together. Exercise. Have sex. Watch movies. Play cards. "
I like the above statement, but sex can end up costing money indirectly. Wish it was more about mutual enjoyment. The cost of courting.  | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 6:17:27 PM | "Money is just an object. Can have more or less of it and it shouldn't change the type of person you are. "
I would agree that it doesn't drastically change who you are as a person. However, it changes your level of independence (at least to a degree) which has an effect on your outlook, mood, and a temporal effect on your personality.
The best advice I can give is to consider that life situations have an impact (whether good or bad) on our actions and can change the direction of personality traits.
Its true a zebra doesn't change its stripes. However, the stripes can get darker (from dirt which would translate to hardships in life) for instance.
Also, women are attracted to independence. Its certainly not everything and only one of many factors. Regardless, its a major factor. Emotional maturity for example would be another sign of independence. All of it fits into the equation.
I hope this helps
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 6:32:28 PM | | u should find a girl that is in the same boat as u, cause i know...no girl with a good paying job wants to date a bum.. no offense | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 6:54:55 PM | " So you're broke. There's still plenty of things you can do to have fun. Make dinner together. Exercise. Have sex. Watch movies. Play cards. "
I like the above statement, but sex can end up costing money indirectly. Wish it was more about mutual enjoyment. The cost of courting.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
That's why it's right smack in the middle. Dead center even. Remove it and what's the point. You have to include it. That's the carrot. Between that and playing cards they're the only two best not done alone. Everything else are really solitary activities. Is exercising really better with a companion? I'll get on the wind bike, you get on the treadmill. Alone again, naturally. When I watch a movie even in a room full of people I might as well be by myself. Although, interaction would be greatly increased if watching a good sporting event. Making dinner I guess would be I'll peel the potatoes, you slice and dice. I'll marinade, you slap those babies on the grill. That is a fun activity for two. I'd be grinning ear-to-ear when doing this just from sheer happiness. Let's not even eat it and throw it away so we can do it again. It would sell better if everything was omitted except sex and cards. Remove sex, you'd just have cards. Nope. Gotta include sex. Cards just doesn't cut it by itself. | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/11/2012 8:05:11 PM | ok, enough with the what women want from a man. right now, in this economy, not remotely possible when ppl are losing their jobs left and right; spending up their unemployment check and their savings just to make ends meet. we can forget the he needs to have a job crap because a man needs to be hired 1st by any job he applies too!!!!!
i agree love does not pay the bills or anything else plus job hunting comes 1st b4 u get involved with anyone. if ur dating and u have no money, ur date will start to see u as a mooch but that may not be the case she may still see u that way. | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/13/2012 9:01:29 AM | Hit off a heist, steal a few million. Women will flock! Then you can spit on all those schmucks who called you poor. And send me some cash.  | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/13/2012 9:37:41 AM |
Get a better job or a second one! Problem solved...Next!
If it were only that easy. I've met quite a few people with graduate degrees in fields that are actually relevant, and they are working bullsh*t jobs that are getting them nowhere.
And the whole "no money" thing is generally harder for men than for women. Our society pretty much defines men by how successful they are, and as Chris Rock said in regard to women "No man will not fvck you cuz you're broke." | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/13/2012 11:23:04 AM | Come on guys... OP exited stage left on page two!
As far as I'm concerned this thread is done! | |
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/13/2012 11:35:09 AM | ‘Cause ain’t nothin’ goin’ on but the rent
You got to have a J-O-B if you wanna be with me
Ain’t nothin’ goin’ on but the rent
You got to have a J-O-B if you wanna be with me
No romance without finance
I said no romance without finance
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| No Money and Looking for Love
Posted: 2/15/2012 2:50:59 PM | This is the OP. Went to change my screen name and didn't realize you didn't have to delete account. Duh and opps.
Thanks Maffers.
"I feel sad about it to be honest. Little disgusted by some of the responses on this post.. "
You exhibit a great characteristic. Empathy. Rare and underrated quality.
OnlyDateIf.
"don't expect anyone else to pay a price for choices you yourself made-that would be unrealistic as well as unfair."
That was awesome. Made me think a lot. I agree with it. Was hoping to find somebody who wants to go along for the adventure. But I hear ya. You added a different tone to my decision making process.
and Leanco.
"but why not live in the here & now and work with what you've got? Someday, when you have accumulated what you perceive to be enough money, you may still not be able to find true love. What will your excuse be then?"
I think living in the here and now has gotten me in to the situation I'm in. But I agree completely. No excuses. Only results. Sometimes the results aren't always what I want but - no excuses.
Thanks to everybody for their input. The different perspectives helped a lot. Your input was extremely valuable to me and while I like to say that I want to change the world. Everybody here is a world changer. Cause you changed my world.
Thanks.
It helps me formulate a plan and decide how to go forward. I'm trying to win the heart of a wonderful woman and it's a lot like hunting deer with your bare hands. I have to procede with extreme care. One wrong move and "poof" she's gone and I'm left standing there with a handful of corn. | |
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