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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > What is the new dating etiquette for over 40's dating?      Home login  
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 risingmist
Joined: 10/6/2011
Msg: 26
What is the new dating etiquette for over 40's dating?Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
Nearly 100% of the men I have spoken to on POF state that "if there is chemistry between us" then we can go beyond coffee. So, that is setting everyone up for failure and what woman is going to want to show up for the "audition" for a cup of coffee?
I explain that for me, chemistry develops as one gets to know another. It is not possible to know anyone in one minute. Translation: if I want to screw you over coffee, then you get to give me more of your unpaid time.

Wow, how compelling. How actually cowardly.

Date younger and date men who were not raised in the US, sitting in front of a TV.
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 27
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What is the new dating etiquette for over 40's dating?
Posted: 2/28/2012 11:35:16 AM

risingmist:
why, why, why do NONE of them come prepared with condoms.


Do you have them in your nightstand? Why should it be only the man to provide protection? Why wouldn't a smart mature woman come prepared for safe sex? When our daughter went off to college I had my wife sit her down and discuss safe sex practices. I would have myself, but felt she might be more comfortable talking to her Mother than me.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 28
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What is the new dating etiquette for over 40's dating?
Posted: 2/28/2012 11:48:11 AM
Well, why should it all be on the woman,either?
Really? REALLY? We're all supposed to keep condoms in our purses, our glove compartments, our nightstands?
Should that be right next to the .45...or in a separate container/compartment?

Guys, I don't disagree with the point that preparedness is everybody's business, but in terms of social reality-y'all are the ones who carry a penis at all times.
Cindy O
 Behind-Blue-Eyes_53
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 29
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What is the new dating etiquette for over 40's dating?
Posted: 2/28/2012 12:05:00 PM

ladyc4:
Well, why should it all be on the woman,either?
Really? REALLY? We're all supposed to keep condoms in our purses, our glove compartments, our nightstands?
Should that be right next to the .45...or in a separate container/compartment?

Guys, I don't disagree with the point that preparedness is everybody's business, but in terms of social reality-y'all are the ones who carry a penis at all times.
Cindy O


You keep a .45 in your nightstand? I'm impressed CindyO, most women tend towards 'cute' little pistols. Though I go with the advise a Police firearms instructor gave me. Use the same type of pistol as your local PD uses, then they can't make a big deal out of what pistol you used.

As for condoms, I carry them, did before I got married, while I was married, and still have them everywhere. But both parties should come prepared, unless you're just using the lack of a condom as your excuse. Then what are you going to say when he pulls out a condom?
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 30
What is the new dating etiquette for over 40's dating?
Posted: 2/28/2012 12:31:25 PM
Why should it be only the man to provide protection?

Because if you aren't prepared you may not get laid. I don't know about you, but if I was going out on a date, I didn't want to get naked and then go home after having an argument about who should have brought the condoms. If you want to be in a position for something to happen, be prepared. Chance favors those who are prepared.
 tilark99
Joined: 1/21/2012
Msg: 31
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What is the new dating etiquette for over 40's dating?
Posted: 2/28/2012 1:06:03 PM
I'm beginning to think it's more of a free for all, than something with clear and reasonable rules. I don't much beleive in rules, but I think each of us has to be guided by our own conscience, and look our for ourselves. Dating is hard-- harder for stupid people (or people who act stupidly).

I guess I see these as the basics:
If you want to get laid, bring condoms. If you want a great person to show up in your life, first work on being a great person. It's okay to put your best foot forward, it's not okay to lie or deceive. It's okay to not feel attracted to someone, it's not okay to be mean about it. You also have to realize that just because you ARE attracted to someone, does not obligate them to like you back.

Bottom line, every time a guy treats a women badly, he should lose his right to be treated like a good man. And vice versa-- when women treat men badly, they no longer deserve to be treated like ladies.
There's more, but that's a start.
 JoseMadre
Joined: 1/9/2012
Msg: 32
What is the new dating etiquette for over 40's dating?
Posted: 2/29/2012 12:46:07 PM

I'm confused; what is the dating (over 40/single parent) process/etiquette nowadays?


One asks the other out on a date, same as it has ever been.


When do you have sex?


When both are ready. For me that means vows said and rings on fingers. Yes, I'm serious. Millions of single females, there have to be some who still believe this way.


when does it go from dating to relationship and how do you know?


You both make it clear that you are exclusive.

I think current societal expectations and standards (or lack thereof) have made it more difficult than it needs to be.
 ontario_woman
Joined: 4/3/2005
Msg: 33
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What is the new dating etiquette for over 40's dating?
Posted: 2/29/2012 12:51:40 PM

why do NONE of them come prepared with condoms. NONE. Having worked in healthcare and knowing how grotesque dying of AIDS is, why would any sane human touch a man who at a mature age, doesn't carry his own birth control? It is mindless for one, to expect sex instantly, and not care if the female is receptive or not, and beyond insanity to not offer condoms.


As long as at least of us remembered the condoms, all is good.

Although, it's not so good when neither of us remembered...
 trh1268
Joined: 2/26/2007
Msg: 34
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What is the new dating etiquette for over 40's dating?
Posted: 3/2/2012 5:07:55 PM
Actually it worked the other way around, my ex's insisted i don't bring condoms, they all keep them in their night table draws because they are picky in which condoms to buy that they like, not what i like.
 Luv_Lyfe
Joined: 7/19/2010
Msg: 35
What is the new dating etiquette for over 40's dating?
Posted: 3/3/2012 3:11:41 PM
I found my post divorce dating at 52+ was just about the same as back in my twenties. The longest I have dated a woman prior to having sex was about three months. I did this with two women. The soonest I have had sex with a woman after meeting her was 20 minutes - she was a nurse and had brought condoms. Another nurse I had dated a couple of times but with whom I had not had sex called me one evening and came over with a condom, pulled it out of her purse and asked if I was ready to do it. She told me she had not been not enjoying her date that night.
 DameWrite
Joined: 2/27/2010
Msg: 36
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What is the new dating etiquette for over 40's dating?
Posted: 3/3/2012 5:11:20 PM
The new dating etiquette is STOP assuming men are pigs just because they want to have sex! There is nothing wrong with finding if you are compatible in bed BEFORE they commit to a relationship.
Sorry but you are a prude and nasty too.

It doesn't sound like you like men, why do you want to date them?
You are not Cinderella no matter what stories you've been told.
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