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Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING      Home login  
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 SpareAir
Joined: 5/6/2010
Msg: 101
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATINGPage 5 of 9    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9)
I would never consent to a background check from some random stranger on a dating site. Why would you want to open yourself up to identity theft? And that is what asking for a background check from a complete stranger on the internet screams to me.
 Bond_Girl
Joined: 6/16/2011
Msg: 102
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/17/2012 12:30:14 PM

I would go to my parish/county sheriff's website and pull a random paroled sex offender then send her his information.
Funny!! And a good point, what's to say that knowing he's been a bad boy in the past that he doesn't just give her a law abiding friend's details!!?
 kiezer490
Joined: 3/29/2012
Msg: 103
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SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/19/2012 2:25:05 PM
Back ground check?...Sounds like she has her head screwed on to me,..thats my girl!..This is the internet after all,.bloody hell,..your first point of contact with me would be through a cam,.if you didnt have one,.id just delete you,.whats wrong with making sure??
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 104
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/19/2012 4:01:35 PM

If you have nothing to hide why resist her demands?

If she's smart enough, she can figure out how to do it without needing to ask me anything. If she wants to do a background check and she needs my help to do it, she's not smart enough for me to want to date her.
 prometheus76
Joined: 1/22/2012
Msg: 105
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/19/2012 5:23:36 PM

Back ground check?...Sounds like she has her head screwed on to me,..thats my girl!..This is the internet after all,.bloody hell,..your first point of contact with me would be through a cam,.if you didnt have one,.id just delete you,.whats wrong with making sure??


Can you give an honest assessment of how this policy is working out for you?
 LAgoodguy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 106
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SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/20/2012 2:52:35 PM
Im not giving no one my personal info what so ever. If someone is so terrifed of going out there and meet some one then there must be something wrong in her head and I dont date a woman that is mental. If anything now I would worry if I'm going to meet someone that is going to flip in the middle of a dinner, cause someone said something or looked at her wrong.
 kiezer490
Joined: 3/29/2012
Msg: 107
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SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/20/2012 3:35:19 PM
Its working fine,.at least i can see that the guy is him from his pics,.soo many fakes here,..one has to be sure,.and sometimes,.i find it is the guy,.but hes 20 yrs older,and 4 stone heavier,.get lost,..lol,.it works it really does:))
 thepigofyourdreams
Joined: 2/23/2012
Msg: 108
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/20/2012 5:46:39 PM
I don't have so much as a speeding ticket against me (no kidding) and I'll be damned if any woman is going to treat me like I'm guilty until proven innocent.

Any man who would cave in to such demands needs to just snip his balls off and hand them to the paranoid lunachick.
 acsmith72
Joined: 12/3/2011
Msg: 109
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/20/2012 8:09:57 PM
Here's the problem I have with this, aside from the violation of privacy: you meet some guy at a bar and you don't run a background check before accepting a drink from him, so why with the online guy?

PLUS, if I give you that information, will you give me yours along with a current credit report, driving record, and recent STD test results? See how bad that looks? It just ruins the whole process and makes it feel more like a transaction. I can pay for that transaction and skip the background checks.
 james78
Joined: 9/3/2005
Msg: 110
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/20/2012 8:32:15 PM
Ya, run. Something.... is wrong
 LAgoodguy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 111
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SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/20/2012 9:22:00 PM
The funny thing is that there are always guys out there that would do anything just for the chance to meet someone or go on a date.. So im sure no matter what some paranoid woman would demand some guy would bow to her will. But then what sort of a guy would she end up with.
 kiezer490
Joined: 3/29/2012
Msg: 112
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SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/20/2012 10:19:53 PM
Theres only one reason why you guys wouldnt want a back ground check,.and its soo obvious,.your either fakes,.losers or both.To be honest i couldnt give a toss what you think,this is the internet and if you cant be bothered to be straight,.then i wouldnt even reply to you,.never mind go on a date...
 good_catch77
Joined: 3/28/2007
Msg: 113
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/20/2012 11:56:49 PM
I often carry my medical charts, background and last five years tax forms with me everywhere I go...esp on dates so that she can get all my information on a moments notice....SARCASM!!! I love it.

If a woman asked me for my personal information for a background check...then she can get that info from another fool. I understand them wanting to be safe, esp if they have children. But a background check only helps for the people that have been caught and/or prosecuted. It still doesn't help against douche bags, cheaters, liars, drunks...and many more. For me it would be almost futile. Actually if she did ask me for mine I'd request hers...if she rebuked then I'd tell her I wouldn't do it for the exact reasons she had just given me. Funny how some stuff is only one way?

Also RUN FORREST RUN!!!! Buy some new shoes afterwords because those will be worn out after all that running.
 Lionesse19
Joined: 3/30/2012
Msg: 114
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/21/2012 12:57:33 AM
Background checks cost money and it would be expensive to do that with a casual net contact who may or may not give you his right name. It think that is taking things too far unless you are in a relationship and have suspicions.
We need to be careful with anyone that we meet as strangers with no friends in common or family but that is a bit paranoid and would scare any man off I would assume.
 thepigofyourdreams
Joined: 2/23/2012
Msg: 115
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/21/2012 1:11:56 AM

Theres only one reason why you guys wouldnt want a back ground check,.and its soo obvious,.your either fakes,.losers or both.To be honest i couldnt give a toss what you think,this is the internet and if you cant be bothered to be straight,.then i wouldnt even reply to you,.never mind go on a date...


Wow, I'm heartbroken.

Keep us updated on how this bullying guys into having their privacy violated thing works out for you.
 vampyreshadow
Joined: 3/21/2011
Msg: 116
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SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/21/2012 4:08:36 AM
People are getting over the top paranoid :P I just meet in a public place, I mean I could ask for background checks, would be easier for me because I am a State Licensed PI (Long story) basically asking random strangers for their personal information when identity theft is prevalent only dates you are going to get are from complete idiots.

Silly method, when you can just as easy wait till later and you are considering making yourself a couple with them.
 FixedVariable
Joined: 10/17/2010
Msg: 117
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SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/21/2012 5:29:09 AM
Theres only one reason why you guys wouldnt want a back ground check,.and its soo obvious,.your either fakes,.losers or both.


I guess the complete invasion of privacy is fine though? The assumption that men ought let you invade their privacy comes off as kind of insane.

It's not as if you can't check up on them a little, say looking at their facebook page, for example, but if you expect complete access to their entire paper trail... you'll be alone a long long time.
 acsmith72
Joined: 12/3/2011
Msg: 118
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/21/2012 7:45:33 AM
Yeah, I'll peek at the Facebook thing if it's not set to private, but that's pretty much it. I don't really have anything good to show in the PAST record-wise, so I would just nip it in the bud and tell that particular girl that obviously we aren't a good fit.

They say the present is a gift, so people should try living in it more. And I'm getting the vibe from the girls on here that want records that they wouldn't be willing to share their own, or would be offended if a guy thought of some record they didn't. Like maybe they want copies of your high school transcripts to make sure you didn't wast time in high school. I did, lol. One big party that was, but you see my point? Records don't tell a single thing about who a person is. They tell about what a person did.

Look, going by records, Germany is a terrible country for killing all those Jews, right? America is even worse for killing all those Native Americans, Mexicans, Spanish, French, Blacks, and anyone else they could. On paper our country looks like crap. But that's not how either country is today. That's the past. If you want to date based on someone's past, put it in your profile that you require background checks to go on the ride, and that you do judge people. They won't even bother with you. Eventually you will find a fellow neurotic and live happily ever after. Unless they turn out to be psycho without a record.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 119
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/21/2012 9:43:51 AM
PLUS, if I give you that information,

Unless your username is a fiction, you already have given someone a lot of the information she would need, if not all of it, if she can make a few educated guesses. If you're going to worry about someone invading your privacy, you ought to do something to make your privacy difficult to invade.

Theres only one reason why you guys wouldnt want a back ground check,.and its soo obvious,.your either fakes,.losers or both.

I'd venture to say that the majority of people who end up in real relationships didn't do background checks on each other. I'd consider such a request the product of paranoid thinking and be happy the person passed on me, so it works both ways.

It's not as if you can't check up on them a little, say looking at their facebook page, for example, but if you expect complete access to their entire paper trail... you'll be alone a long long time.

Most people, especially those who use facebook, have broadcast enough personal information to the world that anyone could get their life histories with very little effort and no one would even know.
 good_catch77
Joined: 3/28/2007
Msg: 120
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/21/2012 11:23:19 AM

Theres only one reason why you guys wouldnt want a back ground check,.and its soo obvious,.your either fakes,.losers or both.


I'm still in awe with this post. For real? That because a man wouldn't want to give his personal information to a complete stranger he's a fake? And yes you are a complete stranger. If you cannot trust him how can you expect him to trust you? In fact these demands would send mega red flags for me.
 kiezer490
Joined: 3/29/2012
Msg: 121
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SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/21/2012 3:26:14 PM
I guess the complete invasion of privacy is fine though? The assumption that men ought let you invade their privacy comes off as kind of insane.

It's not as if you can't check up on them a little, say looking at their facebook page, for example, but if you expect complete access to their entire paper trail... you'll be alone a long long time.

(Excuse me miss,i will have you know that i was married for 27yrs,.and am never alone for long,.if i want back ground checks from someone ive met on the internet,.then thats my business.Each to there own,..
 kiezer490
Joined: 3/29/2012
Msg: 122
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SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/21/2012 3:32:30 PM
I guess the complete invasion of privacy is fine though? The assumption that men ought let you invade their privacy comes off as kind of insane.

It's not as if you can't check up on them a little, say looking at their facebook page, for example, but if you expect complete access to their entire paper trail... you'll be alone a long long time.

(Hang on a second,.this is getting a bit silly,.i never said id be interested in knowing his bloody bank details,credit rating,ect,.what moron would ask things like that??Now i agree that is paranoid,.i mean,.checks on his identity,.work,.is he really single,.my god,.are you people from the US by any chance??
 good_catch77
Joined: 3/28/2007
Msg: 123
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/21/2012 7:00:31 PM

I guess the complete invasion of privacy is fine though?


I never said it was alright to do that...I did say that if a woman cannot trust a man, how do you expect him to trust you. Not all women are made of sugar and spice, never do anything illegal...con artist ring a bell...


It's not as if you can't check up on them a little, say looking at their facebook page, for example, but if you expect complete access to their entire paper trail... you'll be alone a long long time.


Facebook no biggie, heck I'll give everyone the link right now I could care less. I don't have my Social Security Number and only close friends can access my phone number and address. But FB isn't a background check. Background check requires SS#, phone number, copy of license, etc. Results of a background check typically include past employment verification, credit score, and criminal history. I'm not giving my credit score to anyone that doesn't even know me. All this is personal information...and like I said before a background check only helps if the person was actually caught and/or prosecuted. Also if the person has a juvenile record its been taken off too.


Hang on a second,.this is getting a bit silly,.i never said id be interested in knowing his bloody bank details,credit rating,ect,.what moron would ask things like that??Now i agree that is paranoid,.i mean,.checks on his identity,.work,.is he really single,.my god,.are you people from the US by any chance??


Credit rating is a part of a background check...and if you have a SS# you can access their bank account too...generally.

And yes a background check IMO is overly paranoid hence why I said a mega red flag. If someone is that paranoid about every guy the meet then I don't think they should be on the dating scene.

And yes I'm from the USA...
 cajuncooker
Joined: 4/11/2012
Msg: 124
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/21/2012 7:31:12 PM
In todays society I dont blame MEN AND WOMEN for running background checks. But what is the reason. I dated a girl who was raped and she wanted to make sure I had no sex crimes on my record. I also dated a girl who her last boyfriend she found out was a pedophile and she wanted a background check for the same thing. (IE good parenting and smart decisions I applaude them). I dated a girl whose dad was a state trooper and it was part of the daddy requirement for his daughter I dont have a problem with that either.
But then there has been the flip side: one woman said she would not date me because my credit score was way too low. One said because you are clean we want you to do bad things for us ( i wont elaberate).
One wanted to do it because she could.
the point is I think in todays soceity it is a very good thing. YOu can find out if they are physco, have a violent background are looking for sugatdaddies or are gold diggers.
Its just sad though we have to go through those lengths in society today.
Says something about our criminal justice system.
 prometheus76
Joined: 1/22/2012
Msg: 125
SHE SAID A FULL BACKGROUND CHECK IS NEEDED FOR ONLINE DATING
Posted: 4/21/2012 7:59:33 PM

(Excuse me miss,i will have you know that i was married for 27yrs,.and am never alone for long,.if i want back ground checks from someone ive met on the internet,.then thats my business.Each to there own,..


I am imagining the line of dudes waiting outside your door with their paperwork filed in triplicate and in iambic pentameter.
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