| | Phone Number ExchangePage 2 of 2 (1, 2) | There was one person from the forums recently who was such a gentleman that he called me back (one of the few that has my number) because he was concerned about the cost for me to call him (something I hadn't even considered.) Which was such a kind gesture. I don't remember if I gave him my number from the beginning because he's just a trustworthy person so maybe. He's the kind of person who respects boundaries and gives women the chance to feel comfortable.
No hostility, no angry posts with snoring icons (if you're so bored with the convo then why respond?) just a total and complete gentleman. In fact, he's funny as anything, sweet and respectful (I can't use the word "nice," he hates that.) Before took off his pics he seemed to have quite a fan club and I can see why he's been successful with women. And I've never seen him go back and forth trying to trash women on here for wanting to be safe.
So thank God, there are some great guys on here because reading some of the posts on here you wouldn't think so. And they only look better in comparison.  | |
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/15/2012 9:04:16 AM | Lately, with online dating, when it came to the phone call and meeting.....when I would ask for her # to arrange a meeting, she'd always say, "Give me your phone # and I'll call you." And then she would block it, and it would come in as "private".
This is what I call safety, and precaution. Not only that, but I have given my number to a number of men just for it not to go any where. I am mostly referring to flaky men I never even met.
I think it's a wise decision that some people refuse to give out a number, because some of us do so for good reasons. However, safety was not my issue. It was the flakes that through me off. With online dating, I only gave my number to men I planned on meeting and too many times those meets never happened.
As always, it is not only women. I've had men in the past suggest taking my number, and calling me as opposed to me taking theirs. I had no qualms over that. One guy even told me he wanted to make sure I wasn't psycho. I eventually got his number, the door swings both ways and it was fine by me.
Also, what you describe could also be a sign of disinterest but, of course, not always the case. | |
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/15/2012 9:39:15 AM | | If you're so worried about safety then take some self defense courses. Not a hard concept. | |
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/15/2012 11:29:38 AM |
What happens if you cant make the meet or he cant? No way to contact them. You dont have to talk for hours every day. Just dont answer the phone or let it go to message. Simple. Or ask them not to call. Simple. A prepaid phone is the way to go for sure. Then if they stalk or harrass with messages it doesnt interfere with your main communications and you know who would be ringing.
I have a smart phone and so do most people these days so I can pick up a POF message anywhere. Nevertheless a few prospective dates have given the number the day of meeting "just in case" I wouldn't use it unless I was going to be late etc etc. For me I would just rather not. Not that I think everyone is a nut because I have been very lucky with who I have been to meet, its just in case. Just ONE nut can make you want to throw your phone away for ever and I speak from experience.
I can see it from both sides but this is just the way I like it!
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/15/2012 11:33:29 AM |
sprint will allow me to change it as many times as i want and for free. it's very easy to get rid of someone if you don't want them around so it's really unnecessary to act like you're going to get stalked.
Ive had my number for ten years and so wouldn't just change it on a whim. It would take alot to get me to change the number. I had a guy call me non stop for 3 months and I put his ringtone as silent, cussed him out a few times and turned the phone off temporarily while using another number. | |
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/15/2012 12:56:22 PM | Lacalli in msg 26:
There was one person from the forums recently who was such a gentleman that he called me back (one of the few that has my number) because he was concerned about the cost for me to call him (something I hadn't even considered.)
I had to think about this one for a minute. Then I remembered. Back in pre-historic times, when all phones were land-lines, the person originating the call had to pay “long distance charges”, which could be quite steep, as I recall. I suppose only old fogeys like me can remember those ancient days…. | |
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/15/2012 1:46:34 PM | No ohenry, my cell plan doesn't allow me to call other countries. Only within the US. I could add that to my plan but I don't use it enough to make it worthwhile.
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/15/2012 6:58:11 PM |
If it's a safety issue, then buy a prepaid cell phone to use only for contact with online dating.
If I give a woman my phone number, I expect to receive hers. I expect to be able to make calls, as well as receive them.
I think people should be willing to exchange numbers before a date / meeting. That way one person can notify the other person in case he or she is late due to work, traffic, getting lost, prior committments ending later than expected etc. Or ( less likely but still possible ) one person may need to cancel or postpone the date at the last minute. Without your number, the other person may not be able to contact you.
I agree with both quotes. | |
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/15/2012 7:21:45 PM | Let's look at a fine example of how this would usually go for this first time of getting to know a female.
Guy: Hi, I noticed you were standing here and I couldn't let you walk out of my life with out saying hi
Lady: Hi thanks for noticing
Guy: I don't usually do this right away but I would like to keep in touch with you, let's exchange numbers.
Lady: Sorry I don't just give my number like that.
Translation: I'm not interested. | |
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/15/2012 7:29:41 PM | | @34 Yes and that is probably the only advantage of online meeting! You can strike up a convo, that lasts an amount of time for a woman to feel comfortable enough to give you her number or actually accept yours and use it. | |
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/15/2012 8:46:47 PM | if it gets to the point of phone number exchange, i would expect honesty. why play games? the same thing with e-mail and somebody's REAL age. People are so full of garbage and they don't come straight with anything.
It makes me wonder do these people have any character or any backbone? | |
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/15/2012 10:42:45 PM | I am neither psycho, married, or playing online games. (Opinions my vary.  )
I'd describe my online dating experiece(s) as successful, so I feel that my strategy works for me:
email + IM + video chat = successful first date
No man has ever objected---or insisted that we chat on the phone before meeting.
I assume because there is no need since we've already shared a video chat session.
Most people can afford to buy a $10 webcam, and anyone who describes themselves as modern, trendy, friendly, outgoing, fun, adventurous, tech savy, or serious about online dating should already have one.
If you can schedule a time to relax and accept a phone call without any interruptions, surely you can plan a video/chat session.
If you are afraid to try it, I'll assume that your personality and/or looks does not match your profile description and assume that we aren't a match.
I'm not a pervert who immediately asks "got cam?" but as our correspondence progresses I expect a discussion about communication, and will explain my preferences.
In my experience, switching to MSN, unlimited texting, or several telephone conversations prior to meeting do not produce successful first dates.
If a guy did insist that we speak on the phone before meeting, I would call him.
But I'd still refuse to exchange #'s until we've agreed to meet.
So if our phone call does not produce a date, I won't be giving out my number.
Sorry, but I'm not interested in prolonged email/chat/text/phone correspondence especially when MOST first dates do not produce a second.
And it is a terrible disappointment when you finally meet someone after spending hours corresponding---only to discover that there is no chemistry.
Too many people are anxious to get off this site, so they don't use the PoF features.
I am VERY surprised to hear that many members don't use the PoF video/chat feature.
It's not perfect, but it does allow you to view someone's appearance and mannerisms and hear their voice before meeting them. Plus you might get a peek at their surroundings---enough to determine if their signal is coming from a crack house.
And if a guy decides to drop his drawers during a cam session you can simply end the session, block his profile and be thankful that you never agreed to meet him....or gave him your personal telephone #.
If you cannot access the PoF video/chat (as some members state) use MSN or Skype.
I'm not paranoid or insecure.
My opinion is that people who don't respect my preferences won't respect me.
If a guy insists upon receiving my # before arranging a meeting and disqualifies me for not complying with his demands, I would conclude that we were not compatible, and not view it as an opportunity lost. | |
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/15/2012 11:22:43 PM | While I don't ask for a number. I do make a mental note of when a woman does share her number with me without me having to ask.
Also having her number helps in those situations when things don't go as planned and being able to phone and explain is in my my alot better. Then me showing up late and her leaving thinking I was a flake. | |
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Posted: 3/16/2012 4:26:28 AM |
While I don't ask for a number. I do make a mental note of when a woman does share her number with me without me having to ask.
I have no idea what you mean here, seems you've made it more complicated by even the way you phrased this sentence (no offense)
Could you explain in more detail what you mean here, please. | |
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| Phone Number Exchange
Posted: 3/16/2012 4:43:56 AM | | It means that a woman who offers her number without him asking get's bonus points for not making it a ridiculous gauntlet and for taking initiative in making that first move. | |
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