| | How hard do you work on POF?Page 3 of 5 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5) | Right now? I am not even lifting a finger.
I've embraced my forum junkie status.
I guess I don't care anymore... which is sad, really.
It's such a pity my EX's can have an influence over if I want to search again or not. Really, we should not allow other people to damage us this way. Maybe I'll pick it up again in the future. Right now, I just am not in any shape to see anyone new. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 4/21/2012 8:45:54 AM | | I don't work that hard at all, I don't have a strong desire to meet people in the area live | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 4/22/2012 12:56:46 PM | Eh I rarely get messages or responses to my messages. I did and do put effort in to my profile, but I just sort of let it go on its own. Occasionally I will send messages to girls I find attractive with similar interests. Most times they do not respond.
G | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 4/22/2012 6:59:08 PM | Dating sites like this have made me come to wonder if I'm really ugly, really boring or a combination of the two.
I must have sent out a hundred messages between this site and two others and I've gotten almost nothing.
And the only messages I do get that I didn't first send are from women I wouldn't have messaged in the first place.
So really, WTF is wrong with the women on these sites? They're on these sites because they can't meet people in their normal life. You would think they'd be less picky. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 4/22/2012 11:17:22 PM | ^
Nah, you're probably okay. In the real world, I regularly get girls espousing how "gorgeous" I am (how much I believe it, I dunno... but it happens), on here I'm dogs**t.
I've probably messaged 250+ women, yes'd the Meet Me and/or visited profiles for that many again in the last nine months since becoming single... I haven't had a single date from here. | |
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Jen510
| | Joined: 11/12/2011
Msg: 57 | |
| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 4/30/2012 9:57:21 AM | | I wish there was a flirt button, that way if we both flirt we know its a go and we don't waste our time typing to someone who isn't interested whatsoever. hahaha | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 4/30/2012 2:22:42 PM | Hmmm, medium hard :) I have sent plenty of messages to women and rarely get a response. Probably 1 out of 10 or 15. Of those most disappear fairly quickly. Although I have had one actually now write back two weeks after disappearing from our conversation.
Reflecting on this, I have had far more success with women that messaged me first. Probably 75% of the women I have actually met one or more times have messaged me first. Both the ladies I have had relationships with messaged me first. I have 4 pub/coffee first meetings coming up and 3 of those 4 initiated contact. Seems typical that most men get few responses to messages. I guess I have a decent profile so I tend to get 2 or 3 women contacting me every week. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 4/30/2012 2:33:10 PM | | Not hard at all, and 99% of my effort goes into the forums. I'm here mostly for the entertainment value. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 4/30/2012 2:41:58 PM | It's typical.
Wait until a woman you are interested contacts you first. One will, I promise.
Sending out countless e-mails here to women who receive so many new "come-ons" each day that they don't have the time to read all of them is fruitless. Don't you think?
You've got better things to do, I'm sure.
Leave a POF Profile up just like you leave a doughball on the bottom of the river. Just come back to check the line every once in a while. That's all this is, really. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 4/30/2012 2:48:45 PM | Much harder than I think I should have to. (wink)
I wish there was a flirt button,
I use the "favorite" button and the "meet me" button as substitute flirts, as you have to get creative sometimes.
Not that I can tell whether it has really increased my success any. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 4/30/2012 3:09:20 PM | This has turned into an interesting thread. Thanks for the honest answers.
I actually went out on a real life date courtesy of POF the other night. We weren't destined to be, but it was an interesting night out anyway. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 4/30/2012 5:24:04 PM | I read the profile and then reply taking about what they said so they know I read their ad and mix in my own hello and share my commonalities with them.
I put a lot of thought into a reply %95 of the time.
I might get 1 reply in about every 75-100 messages sent out.
You also have to take in account the age bracket and where you live are big factors that determines your odds of a reply. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 5/1/2012 5:39:03 AM | It's an interesting question from the OP.
I get contacted by a reasonable number of women, so in that sense I don't have to work at all, but if I want the freedom to actually choose who I get chatting to and meeting on dates, then I do have to put in the work.
Since I've been on this site, I've sent messages to countless women who haven't replied back, and a few who have.
You can get lucky and message someone right away who will reply, but in most cases it's hit and miss. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 5/1/2012 1:04:10 PM | | I've noticed I only had luck with responses IF the lady was brand new to the site,even had dates with them, so it's good to strike while the iron is hot when you finally see a new face in your search, but with the veterans of the site, they're pretty much unresponsive. Which is probably why they're veterans. lol | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 5/1/2012 6:54:31 PM | | Not really. In fact I see some of the same faces on those sites as well, so why pay. Sometimes I think it's just a tease. Your on here so why not respond to some guys? I guess playing hard to get is the same on-line as it was back in the good old days. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 5/1/2012 10:30:58 PM | I actually used to take this site somewhat serious at one point, but just gave up to be honest. This site has been a huge blow to my self esteem for the most part, when I can go out and just meet someone easier. So I changed my profile up put a silly picture, made my profile a little rediculous and honestly its like they all came out of the woodwork. Haven't met many people from here but the ones that I have weren't really worth the time anyway. I keep the profile up hoping that one day the one I'm looking for will come along.
Honestly based on my experience you have a better chance of meeting a woman away from this site, not trying to deter you maybe try some new photos a different profile write up etc..etc.. I haven't looked at yours so can't offer suggestions just giving you my opinions based on experience.
I used to try to jump through all the hoops women ask for on their profile, but honestly it really isn't worth it you could spend 10 minutes writing up a custom nice though out email only to click send to see it was deleted without even being read. If she's not willing to respond to my hello how are you, then she's shown me that "she" isn't willing to put any effort into getting to know you and doesn't deserve your time. I actually find it rediculous some of the things I've seen women put in their profiles put this word in your message so I know you read my thing etc..etc.. the list goes on and on. And almost all the women's profiles are the same, at least in my area. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 5/2/2012 12:54:05 PM | Got to agree with all of what you said K.
The 'unread/delete' is a classic. I' m not gay (am the extreme opposite) but I am so curious to now check out some of the blokes profiles on here. Looks-wise they look ok and come across as being very eloquent in their posts, but still say how they get hardly any replies, which in all honesty, made me feel a bit better about myself, as I now know it's not just me. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 5/2/2012 6:57:20 PM | no... just think about it even a douche can have some extra bucks to throw their way.
I went on match and found many of the same people from pof there. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 5/3/2012 12:49:26 AM | | My success rate is about 1/20 % I person has responded, she talked to me for like 4 months before telling me she didn't think we would click. I was like, WTF? | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 5/3/2012 1:13:03 AM |
she talked to me for like 4 months before telling me she didn't think we would click. I was like, WTF?
You spent 4 whole months chatting before actually meeting up!? | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 5/3/2012 1:31:17 AM | | Well, Only one email a week, she always laughed at my jokes and said "awww" a lot. We never met by the way. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 5/3/2012 1:44:19 AM | Ah ok. I suppose an email a week isn't a chore.
I know how easy it is to be messaging someone constantly for weeks/months before meeting them (in order to get to know each other better and develop some kind of bond/rapport before meeting), but in my own experience nothing you do beforehand can really change whether or not you'll feel that chemistry when you finally meet - so ultimately the smartest move is to get that first meet arranged as soon as you can.
This way you can quickly find out if you have something with that person (and get on with dating them!), and save yourselves a lot of time and disappointment if you don't. | |
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| How hard do you work on POF?
Posted: 5/3/2012 1:58:31 AM | | To MrJon I agree with the poster above me, Its your job to control the flow of the conversation. Get the meeting asap lock it in otherwise you or she will get bored and move on. | |
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