| | Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?Page 3 of 6 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6) | | I think that guys that are single over 40 and have been screwed by the court system in a divorce situation and as you say "jaded",have a new found freedom and don't wan't to go through another relationship/ marriage situation where your potentially stepping back into a divorce situation and having to go through the b.s. court system and losing more than you did in your first divorce.Most guys now wan't nothing to do with a relationship and are just out for sex.They don't need the hassle of the previous,and are just looking out for fun.In marriage you make a living to support your wife,your kids,paying the bills etc,etc, and in most case such as mine you lose everything to your spouse in a divorce including a majority of the custody.So why would a man who's devoted his life to his wife and kids and then get totally screwed want to go through that b.s.again.I know every situation in divorce is differant and sometime divorce is a guys fault for whatever reason but generally thats why guys just want casual or just sex.They don't want or need the hassle of a relationship unless its absolutely a perfect situation. | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/20/2012 4:34:22 PM | Older men usually want long-term and marriage. I am talking Older 50+
probably not in your age group. However, some would love to
have that with a 15-20 yr. their jr. lol
But that usually don't happen. lol | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/21/2012 10:41:47 AM | Maybe it only seems that way because you see more stories of them here in the internet.
Just like it seems we live in ever more violent times but statistically, we are now living in the most peaceful era humankind has ever known. We just get exposed to concentrated news items on violence and therefore we think the world has become really dangerous when the reverse is really true.
Same with this, I suppose.
You may have heard from blokes replying to you that they are not like that.
So there are guys on here who do believe in having an honest relationship.
It is still up to you, the woman, to choose them over the horndog, though. | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/21/2012 2:26:09 PM | Are men more jaded about relationships when they've just come out of one and are over 40?
Post-divorce and/or multiple LTR breakup experience, sure. And women aren't exactly anti-jaded either. :) And I wouldn't call "just sex" something casual. That's less than something casual -- that's a booty call. Something casual is not settling down together but purposely lingering in the casual "just dating" zone (with yes, sex included at some point of course). I think that's what people who are weary of jumping into relationships are open for... and at the same time, more apt to be open to a booty call at some point or phase.
In the end, though, I don't think it's massively anti-relationship or anything. Instead of "whoo hoo, I don't want to get settled into a relationship yet!" at a younger age, you'll find those with "Ehhh, I'm not ready to get back into one" to replace it.
And if he's getting laid with minimal effort required, no pressure to commit, and the "I don't need a man" attitude thrown at him, who could blame him?
Exactly. If a woman carries a smug "I don't need a man, I'm independent, I get what I want" attitude, ya can't blame a guy for not wanting to go down status-quo-courtship avenue. | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/21/2012 11:19:24 PM | | that's simply not true about the courts. I've lost 2 daughters to exes through family courts and also with the first divorce I ended up only owning the clothes that I stood in!!!!!! not sure why the judges hated me so much to crap on me like that. I had to start again. | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/22/2012 10:48:04 AM |
: elednuw on 4/20/2012 4  05 PM Message: I think that guys that are single over 40 and have been screwed by the court system in a divorce situation and as you say "jaded",have a new found freedom and don't wan't to go through another relationship/ marriage situation where your potentially stepping back into a divorce situation and having to go through the b.s. court system and losing more than you did in your first divorce.Most guys now wan't nothing to do with a relationship and are just out for sex.They don't need the hassle of the previous,and are just looking out for fun.In marriage you make a living to support your wife,your kids,paying the bills etc,etc, and in most case such as mine you lose everything to your spouse in a divorce including a majority of the custody.So why would a man who's devoted his life to his wife and kids and then get totally screwed want to go through that b.s.again.I know every situation in divorce is differant and sometime divorce is a guys fault for whatever reason but generally thats why guys just want casual or just sex.They don't want or need the hassle of a relationship unless its absolutely a perfect situation.
I'm not saying I totally agree with this, but if that's so then us single/divorced ladies are royally screwed and I don't necessarily mean literally. If that's all the majority of men want, then we are. Seems to me that the only relationship that would be the perfect situation for a man who is that gun-shy is a woman is very financially well off. If that situation or marriage didn't work out, he could get alimony or palimony. But then, if I was financially well off, I would have to be on the look out for guys only wanting me for my money. | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/22/2012 8:22:19 PM | | I tend to dissagree that men can get laid when they want to. I have found that it is just the oppisite. Everywhere i go there are ten men to one woman. some of us men are looking for a full relationship, but have needs while looking. and it can take a long time to find that righht relationship | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/22/2012 8:39:48 PM | | Alan I agree I get all kinds of nasty names on here in the forums and through messages because sometime I just want sex instead of waiting for a relationship that I know isnt coming. People are just too judgemental that makes them idiots | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/22/2012 9:46:05 PM | | Yes most guys want casual relationships, and the reason is because most women allow it to happen. Of course, it makes it harder on us guys that are looking for a long term relationship though. As you can see both men and women have become jaded and polarized where they tend to over analyze and over think relationship these days. Accepting what is presented at face value which is genuine and sincere is extremely rare trait to find in another person. | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/23/2012 4:34:10 PM | Msg.39
Not blaming women but the courts favor the party with less income. I have met 2 women that pay palimony, so it does work both ways.
Thank you! Finally someone tells the truth. It’s not just men lose their assets, women too. The HIGHEST earner does, REGARDLESS of their gender. That male self-pity is embarrassing. | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/23/2012 6:01:56 PM |
Are men more jaded about relationships when they've just come out of one and are over 40
I'm not jaded, but,I'm also not stupid. If, I sat down and looked at a possible "relationship" and filled out columns with the positives and negatives of this "potential relationship", what column do ya think would have the most "checks" in it????? If there was even a "possibility" of these check lists being at least "even", I would take this relationship thing a little more seriously.
I honestly think the truely "good" people are slowly retreating and are becoming harder and harder to pull out from underneath the rocks. They will continue to hide, unless the actually see or feel the "possiblity" being at least a little positive. You can talk all ya want about how "great" being in a relationship is,but unless you actually show the intelligent people out there(both male and female) they ain't gonna bite. You can't feed BS to a smart person for too long before they tell ya to go phuck off. Just the way it is.
Just imagine what the younger generation is gonna be asking themselves when they hit 40,50 and 60!!!!!! | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/23/2012 10:22:03 PM | Wow. I guess I am an oddball, or I was born in the wrong decade.
I do not agree with casual sex, friends with benefits or whatever term people wanna use these days. If I get intimate with someone, it is because I feel a connection and intend to make it a long term relationship. So I have been intimate with 4 women in my entire life. And for 18 years, it was with just one woman. (yes, there are men out here who don't cheat) So, if this the "normal" way things are, then I am decidedly not normal.
So to answer your question, apparently more and more men over 40 are looking for sex, but that doesn't mean every man is. Some of us are different.
As I told my lady when we first met, how long, how far AND how fast this goes is entirely up to her. She was worth waiting for. | |
|
| |
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/24/2012 10:32:08 AM | I think if all a man is after is casual or 1niters an quickies he should be upfront about that an also put that out there in his profile as well as being upfront about having a girlfriend or wife..
too many times a guy will blah blah on about wanting a good woman this an that an looking for love or check longterm next thing you know the truth comes out an thier only wanting to bang random women an add numbers to thier list or the good respectful man he claimed his self to be in his profile who wasnt looking for sex now turns around an says yes im just looking for a quick booty call im not looking for a relationship..
half of them cant even tell you why they lied an most will not change thier profile an say these things upfront..they will just keep lying an pretending.hoping some sucker will come along.. | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/24/2012 12:43:42 PM | | Its harder to find people that you might want to have a relationship with and they with you. But it's much easier to date other in a casual way. Its not just men but women as well. I often see on a profile "looking to date but nothing serious" I do live in LA so I'm sure that has something to it as well. Women seem to complain about it more then guys on here. But you know what, women do like guys that have game. Its not like we guys are so smart that most of the women dont notice when the guy has the game face. They just complain that when they dont end up keeping him. Guess what the only way you get your game better is by practice. Did meet lots of women too that are players. and lots of guys fall for them. Then they start hating on women cause they got played. Its just how things go in dating. Every once in a while someone would meet someone else and it would click. So they stay longer togher, Thats an all new story on how long they stay togher and why. | |
|
vegc
| | Joined: 4/15/2012
Msg: 66 | |
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/25/2012 8:56:12 AM | | I think maybe its the free site thing! If a guy is serious about finding someone he will be prepared to pay to find her. Its too easy to stay on free sites if you are a player and make less effort with the girl they have chosen to date as it won't cost anything to just put their profile right back up there when it ends. | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/25/2012 12:08:34 PM |
vegc: I think maybe its the free site thing! If a guy is serious about finding someone he will be prepared to pay to find her. Its too easy to stay on free sites if you are a player and make less effort with the girl they have chosen to date as it won't cost anything to just put their profile right back up there when it ends.
So why are you here on this FREE site instead of the pay sites? By your statement, If you're serious about finding someone you would pay to find them too. Or are you another one who thinks the men should pay for everything? | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/25/2012 12:38:02 PM |
Its too easy to stay on free sites if you are a player and make less effort with the girl they have chosen to date as it won't cost anything to just put their profile right back up there when it ends.
Whether or not you can find guys who are serious depends mainly on the way you pick guys, not where you find them. | |
|
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/25/2012 1:18:17 PM |
I think maybe its the free site thing! If a guy is serious about finding someone he will be prepared to pay to find her. Its too easy to stay on free sites if you are a player and make less effort with the girl they have chosen to date as it won't cost anything to just put their profile right back up there when it ends.
since you see women as a commodity that goes to the highest bidder, what does it say about you that you're marketing yourself here in the 99 Cent Store of the dating world? | |
|
| |
vegc
| | Joined: 4/15/2012
Msg: 71 | |
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/25/2012 5:05:55 PM | | Behind - Blue- Eyes. I've never let a man pay for anything. I don't NEED a man to pay for anything I am self sufficient. How dare you assume that I would... The statement was why men are after casual...I was saying that maybe free sites attract more men after casual, whereas men who are after more serious relationship will statistically more likely to be found on paying sites. I personally like the free sites because I am not tied in for a period of time and find it is a good place to meet new friends. I would though go on a paid site, as I think people more serious about finding a long term partner would make the effort to go on a paying site (men and women included) because IF YOU PAY then you will surely put more effort into making it work or it will cost you far too much to be single! I didn't say all guys on here are after casual, there are decent men on here looking for serious, but lots who aren't. God some people..you men WISH we women all took you for a ride...most men i've ever dated freeload from me, in fact I don't know a single girl who does take a thing from any man! | |
|
| |
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/25/2012 11:32:21 PM | | I used to only want serious relationships, but 97% of women dont seem to want that I treat a girl like crap and ignore her and she will txt me for days.... weeks after i stop texting her... then i tell a girl shes cute seems like my type and that id love to treat her to dinner and get to know her sometime.... no response.... honestly when I send "Wanna smash ur hot" or ür nose looks wierd" ill get tons of responses to the point i dont even respond to all of them... I send something sweet respectful and funny... and I never get a response.... Nice guys finish last realized that a loooooooooong time ago the hard way.... also this kinda seems to be an age thing feels like all women 15-25 likes ***holes and dont get it... w/e Ill play those dumb games | |
|
| |
| Does it seem like more and more men only want casual?
Posted: 4/27/2012 11:14:45 AM | Quite honestly it takes tow to tangle and today many women have amazing careers and no longer need a man to take care of them.
I thought sex was easy when I was a teenager in the navy (17 -21 years of age) but today it is outrageously easy to get laid when making a "service call"
I cannot count have many employees over the years I had to fire because they were having a fling or a full blown affair with my accounts
Times have changed and why would anyone want to get stuck for life when they can have a date every night of the week if they want to. | |
|
Home
login 
