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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?      Home login  
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 RockabillyPaGirl
Joined: 10/19/2011
Msg: 26
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship? Page 2 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)

lmao @ men and relationship in the same sentence lol. Thats a good one. Men dont want them because they can get sex free and if a girl isnt a beauty queen or megan fox they wont settle for less


I have to agree with the guys domo...

I am by no means a beauty queen or Megan fox and I have no problems getting dates.

I dated a man for 7 months from on here. Have had several other shorter term relationships that ended on a good note. We just weren't into each other... I am currently seeing someone from here.

You are so hung up on age and some petty requirements you wont relax enough to loosen up and have some fun.

I used to be hung up on height and a few others stupid wants myself. I would have missed out on the guy I am seeing now. He is about 2 inches shorter than myself. Not my usual look. But damn we have fun on several levels and seem to have similar needs and wants dating wise not to mention things in common.

If I wouldn't have said what the freaking Hades after a few crappy blow offs a few weeks ago I would have missed out on one hell of a guy.
 redsox322
Joined: 11/3/2011
Msg: 27
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 7:11:26 PM
Rockabilly I just dont want to settle. You could treat me like gold but if I am not attracted its never going to work out. Age requirement is a huge thing for me. I dont think I have found a single man in their 40s attractive thats not a celeb. I see nothign wrong with dating a 27 yr old instead of older men who have kids which im not trying to spend my money on or babysit
This bottom part isnt directed to you rock since you seem to have manners
Ok correction men in their 20s and early 30s dont seem to want to settle down. Im not stupid so dont be an ***hole.
 Gertrude13
Joined: 5/14/2012
Msg: 28
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 7:13:09 PM
Actually, the OP has a good point. There was another forum thread where they discussed the "deeper meaning" of "not looking for a relationship" or whatever that box says.

A surprising number of the women there said that they immediately reject any man who isn't "looking for a relationship."

Several of the men there admitted that they listed "looking" on their profiles because they wouldn't get any dates (or sex) any other way. So it seems that the men who want to play the field often do list that, even when it's patently untrue.

I wish they'd rename those stupid boxes. How's this:

Desperate to be with someone - ANYONE
Really want to get married soon, will settle for someone with an income and a pulse
Attempting to have sex with as many people as possible before it rots off
Would love FWB, but not looking to bang anything that moves
Not really looking for a relationship, but moderately open to the idea if someone really special came along.
Terrified of commitment, but terrified of dying alone
Playing around with online dating to study human nature, because it's weirder than reality TV.

What would be REALLY fun is if POF could figure out which category the member really fits, and post it automatically.

Summary: Lots of people list that to avoid looking like they are horn dogs.
 RockabillyPaGirl
Joined: 10/19/2011
Msg: 29
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 7:14:06 PM
Ok correction men in their 20s and early 30s dont seem to want to settle down.


Then that section of the male population can't give you want you are looking for expand your world a bit. Nobody said you have to date them seriously. Go out have fun and who knows. And I am not talking about going for the guys old enough to be your dad. I am with you yuck. My dad is only 20 years older than myself and I just can't do it either.

The guy I am seeing is my age (38) never been married. No kids or ex... I have met several like him. I actually prefer men with no kids or kids over 13. I am the one with the grey hairs (damn ex husband and 3 boys). Thank the gods for hair dye.

I have just found when you are out having fun living life and not worrying about statics on a drivers license dating is a lot more fun.
 neck romancer
Joined: 9/7/2006
Msg: 30
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 7:14:36 PM

Ok correction men in their 20s and early 30s dont seem to want to settle down. Im not stupid so dont be an ***hole.


well actually alot of them do..I did! unfortunately they did not want to settle down with you is all.
This goes back to what I said earlier... that you are displacing fault on someone other than yourself rather than working on the real problem. Which is most likely yourself.
 SSC-SAF
Joined: 5/20/2012
Msg: 31
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 7:18:02 PM

What would be REALLY fun is if POF could figure out which category the member really fits, and post it automatically.


It would be PoF's version of the Sorting Hat!
Lots of Slytherins around here.
 catchnrelease71
Joined: 10/11/2011
Msg: 32
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 7:28:35 PM
The irony in this all if you can even call it that is that men that want relationships are going to be more picky than those that want to date. I have that I want to date on my profile, but I really do want a relationship. I just know that I'm not going to settle and if it takes me meeting 100+ women, I'll do it. That's why I put that I'm interested in dating. That's where any relationship starts right? You'll know when you meet one that is relationship material, just hope that they feel the same way about you which is rare, but magic when it happens.
 Gertrude13
Joined: 5/14/2012
Msg: 33
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 7:30:52 PM

It would be PoF's version of the Sorting Hat!
Lots of Slytherins around here.


mmmm....parseltongue rocks!
 MementoMori32
Joined: 9/12/2011
Msg: 34
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 7:34:23 PM
Domo: I can't speak for every man out there, but I was ready to settle down and quit dating around in my late 20's. I don't want to sound like I'm tryin to be rough on you, but there is a good chance the guys you're talkin about just didnt want to settle down with you. Saying you don't want to settle down right now seems a lot kinder than saying "you were fun for a while, but not the type of girl I want to be with long term"
 RockabillyPaGirl
Joined: 10/19/2011
Msg: 35
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 7:54:53 PM
No one is saying settle into a relationship with just anyone. You can date and have fun without settling.

I have been on a ton of meets and greets and first dates that never went anywhere. You know what I enjoyed myself. Met some interesting and strange people. Doesn't mean I need to pick out china patterns with him or anything.

I have met a few guys I wasn't into and a few not into me and a lot more that we were both like no way. I have learned a lot about myself the last two years. It has made me more confident in what I am looking for in a man. And also realize that there are some surprises out there. Sometimes you have to look beyond the way people present themselves. Sometimes we are our own worst enemy and sabotage ourselves.

I am just saying have fun and get out there girl. You are going to hinder your chances and finding him hiding behind your wall.
 Dmaj7
Joined: 5/13/2012
Msg: 36
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 8:03:11 PM
"It's a known fact. You men will be single til your about 50 cause you R too afraid to committ"

Wow you should be on Oprah.
 dearsavannah
Joined: 5/19/2012
Msg: 37
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 8:23:42 PM
Really? I find that on most profiles men are just looking for "casual dating" or... well, anything other than a relationship. Haha.

I can't answer this, seeing as I am not a man.
 redsox322
Joined: 11/3/2011
Msg: 38
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 8:25:58 PM
I dont know what more to do to improve myself other than lose more weight and try to be happy. Its really sad that noone seems to find me the least bit attractive. :( Ok I am kind of negative but its after years of abuse and dissappointments which Im talking to someone about so. Im not perfect but I want love like any other woman
 lynyrd_hatchet
Joined: 5/29/2012
Msg: 39
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 8:35:39 PM
of course most men want a relationship it just have to be with the right type of woman, there are two types of women for most guys ones you bang and one you have a relationship with.
 J_bird61
Joined: 10/22/2011
Msg: 40
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 9:28:20 PM
ok, fess up. Who'd you run into and what'd he do?
 CRTS_fiore
Joined: 3/31/2012
Msg: 41
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 9:29:54 PM
I don't care what you all say negative or positive. It's your Alls opinion.
I didn't intend for negativity. I was half asleep when i wrote the forum, working 3 jobs doesnt leave a lot of time for sleep.
If someone doesn't want to date me, then they don't want to date me. I have that same manner if I don't want to date someone. We all have a special someone out there somewhere.
And neck romancer, I bet you if you met me in person, you'll see I'm actually a nice person. Lol.
 UnreadDeleted
Joined: 6/7/2009
Msg: 42
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 9:55:40 PM
3 jobs and no time for sleep?

While I admire your work ethic, I think that's part of your problem meeting the type of guy you're looking for. You have no time to put into a committed relationship. And guys...at least guys like me....aren't interested in working on a "relationship" if the woman is too busy working. Sounds like it becomes a text/email relationship, and most aren't looking for a pen-pal. Sounds like you need to find a happy balance in your life, first, before you bring others into it...
 neck romancer
Joined: 9/7/2006
Msg: 43
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 10:14:37 PM

And neck romancer, I bet you if you met me in person, you'll see I'm actually a nice person. Lol.


I never implied you were a bad person. Just seeing things from the wrong perspective.
 CRTS_fiore
Joined: 3/31/2012
Msg: 44
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 10:18:02 PM
I think I'd rather find someone who worked a full time job, working 40-50 hrs a week, then someone who is staying home all the time with no stability in their life.
I have an equal balance for work, dating, and fun. On my profile, I have that I'm NOT looking for text or email. I find time to meet someone if I need to.
 VienneSeule
Joined: 5/10/2012
Msg: 45
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 10:21:25 PM
well actually alot of them do..I did! unfortunately they did not want to settle down with you is all.
This goes back to what I said earlier... that you are displacing fault on someone other than yourself rather than working on the real problem. Which is most likely yourself.

Never mind this demeaning B.S.
Theres a lot of bitter men on this site taking out their anger about the fact that theyre still alone depressed and have low self esteem on innocent thread starters.
They have been damaged and can find no other way to feel better about themselves but to lash out at random women who posts threads for advice and make women feel down about themselves.

I think a lot of guys say theyre looking for relationships because
1. They know if they put their real intentions no women will go for that
2. They do want a relationship but their standards are too high or theyre looking for someone out of their league (purely physical or physical first)and therefore havent found anyone yet.
3. They think they want a relationship but really just want to play games and make unreasonable demands and requests which no women could possibly fulfill
4. They think they want a relationship but theyre not over their ex.

Thats what I have found anyways.

(P.S. Youre right a lot of these posters, and 90% of the men Ive ever dated who CLAIMED they were looking for a relationship only to stay single on this site forever, WILL be single till theyre 50.)
 UnreadDeleted
Joined: 6/7/2009
Msg: 46
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 10:28:12 PM
" I was half asleep when i wrote the forum, working 3 jobs doesnt leave a lot of time for sleep "


Your words. Equal balance for work, dating and fun? Have to sleep in there sometime... And again, you "find time to meet someone if I need to"?

Still sounds like you're after a part-time relationship, thinking it's a full-time thing...
 TantricJedi
Joined: 2/22/2012
Msg: 47
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 10:32:43 PM
Hey VienneSeule, I'm gonna give away some insider information...want to keep a man? Make him desire you AFTER the sex:) If I want you in the room when we're done...I'll marry you. Blunt and raw!
 VienneSeule
Joined: 5/10/2012
Msg: 48
So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 10:48:36 PM

Hey VienneSeule, I'm gonna give away some insider information...want to keep a man?


I actually have 2 I cant get rid of...Can you help???
 neck romancer
Joined: 9/7/2006
Msg: 49
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 10:52:51 PM

Never mind this demeaning B.S.
Theres a lot of bitter men on this site taking out their anger about the fact that theyre still alone depressed and have low self esteem on innocent thread starters.
They have been damaged and can find no other way to feel better about themselves but to lash out at random women who posts threads for advice and make women feel down about themselves.


Another fine example of my point. This woman cannot accept that she is the issue and is putting blame on everyone else but herself.
Oh and I get to bring up your favorite book! "Hes just not that into you" applies here. Thats why they dont want a relationship with you. If they were, they would!
 ontarior
Joined: 8/11/2010
Msg: 50
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So how come most of you men say you want a relationship?
Posted: 6/1/2012 11:04:07 PM
I think we're all picky and dating online makes it even worse. When you start looking at all the profiles it reminds me of shopping for shoes on amazon. "No, not that one." "Oooo, I like that one but it looks expensive." Heck, I can't even remember which ones I liked after looking through a bunch! And lets face it, once they show up, half the time you'd like to send them back!

I think the Rockabilly Girl said it best, we need to drop about 75% of all the pre-requisites we've dreamed up for the person we'll give the time of day. Then maybe we'll find someone truly amazing?
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