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| Am I Doing The Right Thing. Would like a man's perspective as well.
Posted: 7/13/2012 6:14:34 PM | Lets see here, Feb. 2012. He went into my mom's job, she is a manager at Long john silvers here in michigan city, indiana; he is now banned from the store. He went ballistic!! Oh my god, I am the reason he is paying support; not because he went there because I asked for it. He put us in a woman's abusive shelter and my eldest was crying his ass off; and so was his youngest child.
He isn't a loving dad...what is your definition of a loving dad? Because, I honestly feel that you're mental. You don't have to be a trained professional to see when someone is crazy.
His dad, once told me after we broke up. He said, had you not had a child with him; I would have told you to leave him. He use to get in fist fights with his dad and his dad locked himself in his own bedroom!!!! Come on now.. I have text messages where his own step mom THIS YEAR was going to call the cops on his ass; because, he was calling her and calling her names because he wanted my address lmao...yeah I am really going to do that again, give him my address. If you live in Michigan city, come to my house and I will show you my 2 old cell phones with the text messages from him and his step mom!!!
Oh yeah, by the way, him and his step mom are visiting the kids next month and they sad, I quote" there will be no need to tell shawn about us coming to visit." Because it is just grandmother and grandpa time!!! Come on now!! why would his own parents say shit like that??? | |
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| Am I Doing The Right Thing. Would like a man's perspective as well.
Posted: 7/13/2012 6:22:19 PM | The thing is he doesn't ask about him. There were times when I would be at my mom's house and than he would show up and my son says hi Shawn. There are times where I have heard him say, shawn didn't get me anything for my bday. He's 5. So I would say, my son has probably seen his dad 5 times this year. But when it really mattered like Christmas and his bday this year and last March 7, he was no where to be found. I feel like he is the one missing out. But I am not going to help him become a dad either. It takes a man to be one. He didn't call, didn't give him a banana or an apple. Last year, asked me to loan him 327.00 on his son's bday. REALLY? So really, everything he does, makes me become over it anyway. Than I find out...oh he is taking care of some other child and giving her 4 kids everything they want. But they can't get shit....
so I work my butt off doing what I can do and by the way, ummm yeah child support paid for Daycare..oooh wow. They have to be the other parent and watch them....so really him paying child support is him paying the day care for the time he should be watching them...so to me it is, what it is......I know some day god, will bless me with a good man to be their father and if not; I will continue to do what a good dad/mom would do for their sons. | |
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| Am I Doing The Right Thing. Would like a man's perspective as well.
Posted: 7/13/2012 6:30:15 PM | I don't agree with his lifestyle either but it has nothing to do with me or our child.
I have been through soooo much it's crazy. I would fall asleep on the couch and would forget to wake up and go get in bed. Well he would come home and find me there and would get really pissed off.
I use to wake up at 2 am 6 am when he would get home and start making him dinner or warm up food; even though, I had to get ready for work or get the kids off to school. I would make a make up dinner; because I felt like I did all the wrong anything to smooth out the situation.
I pray everyday my oldest son doesn't turn out like him. he has called the cops 2 times.. on him and as he gets older; i see attitude but I keep telling myself he will be a teenager soon. | |
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| Am I Doing The Right Thing. Would like a man's perspective as well.
Posted: 7/28/2012 10:06:28 AM | | This is simple, it was abusive both physically and emotionaly. He sounds still emotionaly abusive. Call your court system and find out where local supervised visitaton places are at. If your ex asks for a visit set it up at the supervised place. Don't deny the visit. Many times you have to pay a fee and you should pay this if you can to show you really do value your child having a dad. But it sounds like he doesn't want them and isn't asking for them. If he wants more than supervised he can take you to court to get it. I would otherwise block this guy from your phone or whatever so he can't abuse you. Find a way for him to contact you regarding visits and otherwise cut him out of your life. If he sn't calling to set up a visit or to talk to your son then you don't need to talk to him. | |
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| Am I Doing The Right Thing. Would like a man's perspective as well.
Posted: 1/28/2013 7:41:33 PM | | to be honest , the other person is write he is paying child support but he dose act crazy thats the bad part the kids will have to see that on there own but you should monitor him you might be able to get suppervied visitation a friend of mine i work with has it set up like tht with his x .i just hope things work out for the kids . | |
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| Am I Doing The Right Thing. Would like a man's perspective as well.
Posted: 1/29/2013 1:02:41 AM | | aww baby my heart goes out to you, and your babies , i have dated women with kids all my life and i treated the kids as they were mine -i would ignore your ex and find another man it wont be easy cause of the kids i am a widow ive had a few women in my life but i ended up raising my kids by my self i never wanted to remarry it just my preference my later when im 60 ill shack up with someone - good luck | |
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| Am I Doing The Right Thing. Would like a man's perspective as well.
Posted: 1/31/2013 8:57:20 PM | | Keep records on everything....keep records on all call...each date he harrassed mom. Everytime he was abusive...keep everything and document it well....... Take it to court and he will have no visitsation unless superevised. Also, you can have a restraining order on him against the kids. Butr you HAVE to have it documented | |
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