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| | When your best friend is attracted to your matePage 2 of 2 (1, 2) | | I believe every woman on earth was attracted to my best friend. The guy was absolutely nothing short of a chick magnet. We'd walk into a club in the old days, women would send us drinks, ask him to dance. My girlfriends at the time tended to be his rejects of course. | |
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| When your best friend is attracted to your mate
Posted: 7/9/2012 12:24:58 AM | | I've been attracted to plenty of my friends' girlfriends and they've been attracted to plenty of mine. Didn't change anything. Who cares about attraction anyway, I'm attracted to half the women who prance around here, its acting on that attraction that matters. That's a line I don't cross. | |
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| When your best friend is attracted to your mate
Posted: 7/14/2012 6:52:13 PM | | if this sort of thing happens, it is best to try to head it off at the pass by ejecting the best friend from your life as soon as possible. the other thing you can do, (which is not very nice i suppose, but hey, all is fair in love and war, no?) start subtly bad mouthing your friend to your significant other. you have to be very subtle about it. for example, just very nonchalantly let the sig other know that your so-called-best-friend has some issues, or has a past, high light the flaws, preface your conversation about this friend by saying, "...yeah...i've known so and so such a long time...she is great...but _______" and fill in the blank with whatever little annoying flaw that you know would drive your sig other crazy. what you are doing, in essence, is third partying your friend. now, it is not nice to third party someone, but hey, if you suspect that your friend has designs on your partner, then the gloves might need to come off a bit. if you want to protect your relationship from the intrusion of someone else, then this is a tactic to take. you could even go so far as to tell your sig other that the friend didn't approve of the two of you dating, make up some story about how the friend doesn't really like your partner, etc.. the list is endless. after you plant these seeds, then you avhe to be careful not to let them be around eachother too much after that. meetings between the friend and sig other should be fleeting and only in larger groups of friends. yep, i know it sounds mean, and i know it sounds very under handed, and it is all of those things...but this is love were talking about...and you do not hvae to go down with out a fight...lol | |
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| When your best friend is attracted to your mate
Posted: 7/14/2012 7:17:39 PM |
My perspective is that if you dating and meet someone who is better suited and will make you happier, you go with that. It also applies to whoever you are dating - I'd rather see them make the best choice for them, and if that isn't me, then we shouldn't be together. Even after making a commitment, I feel that being together is a choice you have to make each day, so both need to act to make that choice easy to sustain.
As for losing a friend over it, that's your choice, and I think it's a bad one. I'd rather be happy that my now ex-gf and my good friend found happiness together, and keep them in my life.
Now there's a magnanimous attitude, if ever there was one.
*Jac tips hat* | |
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| When your best friend is attracted to your mate
Posted: 7/14/2012 7:33:08 PM | Attraction is one thing. What you do about it is another thing entirely.
Your best friend will not go after your girlfriend. If he does, he was never your friend.
And if she goes after him, you best friend will turn her down. If he doesn't turn her down, he was never your friend. | |
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| When your best friend is attracted to your mate
Posted: 7/15/2012 10:44:22 AM | Well, it makes perfect sense--what attracts you to your best mate? Shared beliefs, shared personalities, shared needs, all that.
What was your lass attracted to in you? Maybe your looks...but also, your beliefs, personality, needs all that.
now, if she wants more than just looks, if she really wants a relationship based on personality and shared beliefs and needs...well, guess where your mate falls into this. Its why so many cheat with friends, brothers, etc--along with, of course, the simple fact of location, location, location :) | |
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| When your best friend is attracted to your mate
Posted: 7/15/2012 11:20:19 AM |
You need better friends.
Good friends go by the Bro Code.
They only approach an ex after clearing it with you, and usually only after a healthy amount of time. Otherwise, it's 100% off limits.
I couldn't have said it better myself................Good Friends go by the Sister Code as well.
Any betrayals of friendship, will not receive a second chance. All I ask, is that they keep a real good distance away from me and my family. Anybody without an honorable system of good moral principles won't have the honor of being called my friend, so I choose my friends wisely. | |
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| When your best friend is attracted to your mate
Posted: 7/15/2012 12:42:15 PM | If that happens, that maybe your fault. Lol
Maybe: you like your best friend and always thinking about him so that keep talking about him all the time. To her, the brainwash works well.....like him
When you are with your friend, you keep talking about her, so...to him, she is amazing
Also, something you like___her, your friend would have interesting . Something you like-----him, she would have interesting.
Now you know the solution: keep the best in your heart only. Lol | |
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| When your best friend is attracted to your mate
Posted: 7/15/2012 3:21:07 PM | | to me . its about respect on all levels . if the freind goes after her . not much of a freind . and not much of a girlfreind . i would trust your gut feelings . just dont make excuses for poor behavior . | |
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